Chip and Dale's Rescue Rangers: Old Flame, Old Habits

Chapter 1

'Maybe he's just going to the bathroom or something,' said Dale, who was thoroughly bored of tracking Mepps from the air. The villainous alley cat seemed to be walking all over the city without any aim at all, except to sniff around the odd rural area.

'Don't be stupid, Dale,' said Chip. 'He wouldn't come all the way out here for that.'

'Cats like their privacy,' said Dale. 'Oh, now look - he's going into the woods. We'll lose him. Might as well go home.'

'Actually,' said Gadget, 'I think he's stopping.'

All five of the Rescue Rangers peered down through the trees, but they couldn't see much, as it was dark and the foliage was thick. Chip decided to manoeuvre the Ranger Wing between the branches and land on a relatively tree-free patch of ground. Mepps, who was sniffing around a semicircle of cedar trees, couldn't fail to hear them. He looked up as the Rangers all alighted from their craft.

'Oh no,' he said. 'What are you doing here?'

'That should be obvious to you, Mepps,' said Chip. 'We're following you. Now, the real question is, what are you doing here?'

'Nothing,' said Mepps. 'Leave me alone.'

'Maybe he is going to the bathroom,' said Monty.

Mepps frowned at him. 'I am not! I'm just checking things.'

'What things?' demanded Chip.

'I don't have to tell you,' said Mepps. 'You can't do anything to me. Doesn't it bother you that I'm a cat? I could tear you all to pieces, you know.' He said this with a distinct lack of conviction.

'We're not going to get anything out of him, Chipper,' said Monty. 'Might I suggest we start searching the place?'

'Good idea, Monterey,' said Chip, and they did.

Zipper and Chip made a thorough search of the trees, while Monty and Gadget stuck to the low ground. Dale yawned, thought of his bed at home and then took off after Mepps when he saw that he was leaving.

'Hey, Mepps!' he called. 'You done here?'

'Never you mind,' said Mepps.

'Say,' Dale went on, 'you weren't being a decoy or something, were ya?'

'A what?'

'You know, a distraction to get us out of the way while Fat Cat does something.'

'I'm not telling you,' said Mepps, and with that, he turned and slunk off. Dale turned too, in the opposite direction, found Chip halfway up a tree and voiced his decoy idea.

'Well, why didn't you think of that before?' said Chip.

'Why didn't you?' said Dale.

'I don't know! Well… there doesn't seem to be anything here, or not yet, anyway. Maybe we should head back and see if Fat Cat's up to something.'

'Aww, do we have to? We've been at this for hours!'

'Of course we have! We're Rescue Rangers. This is what we do. Is there any reason why you're so keen to get home? Do you have plans with Foxglove and that horrible friend of hers, or something?'

'Who?'

'You know,' said Chip. 'Linny or Libby or whatever her name is.'

'It's Liddy,' said Dale, 'and she's not horrible. She's just, she, she, she takes some getting used to, that's all.'

'Oh yeah? Are you used to her?'

'Well, not yet, but…'

'Come on, we'd better go.' Chip ran down the tree trunk and called, 'Gadget! Monterey! Zipper! If no one's found anything, we're going.'

Once they were all back in the Ranger Wing, Chip explained that they were going to check on Fat Cat, as it had occurred to Dale that Mepps might have been a decoy.

'Wish you'd thought of that sooner, pally,' said Monty.

Dale scowled. 'I'm the only one who thought of it at all.'

'That's true,' said Gadget. 'We all should have thought of that, really. Oh well, it's too late now. And if Fat Cat has been up to something, I'm sure we can deal with it.'

A visit to the Happy Tom cat food factory showed that Fat Cat was doing nothing more sinister than reading the newspaper, and a look-in at Sergeant Spinelli's office turned up no crimes for which the notorious feline might have been responsible. After that, the Rangers went home at last.

'Mepps could still have been acting as a decoy,' said Chip, as they filed through their mailbox front door, 'or he could really have been up to something. Either way, we'll have to keep a close eye on Fat Cat. I call first in the bathroom!'

Dale came out of his fatigued stupor long enough to race Chip to the bathroom, but didn't manage to beat him. He wasn't particularly sorry. At least he had seen a little of the old, pre-Rescue Rangers Chip, as he sometimes did, and that was always nice. He decided to go straight to bed, and was about to do so when there came a knock at the door. Dale went to answer it.

'Holy cow!' he said, slamming the door in the visitor's face.

'Dale!' said Gadget.

Dale blinked a few times, pulled the door open again and said, 'Hi, sorry, come in. Wow. I wasn't expecting -'

'Hi yourself!' said a voluptuous female chipmunk, flinging her arms around Dale's neck. 'Oh my gosh, it's so good to see you! Is Chip here too?'

'Uh… yeah,' said Dale, making no move to free himself from the woman's embrace until he heard the bathroom door opening. Then he prised himself away and said, 'I'll get him. Chip!' He ran on all fours towards the bathroom. 'Chipper!'

'What?' called Chip, who had been about to settle down for a few hours' sleep.

'Clarice is here,' said Dale.

'Who?' said Chip.

'Clarice.'

'No she's not.'

'I think you'll find she is,' said Dale.

Monty, Gadget and Zipper could hear every word of this. They exchanged a puzzled look, and then all turned towards Clarice and smiled at her. She smiled weakly back, clearly feeling awkward about the whole situation.

'What are you…?' Chip came stalking into the room, frowning at Dale. Then he did a double-take when he saw their visitor. 'Clarice! Uh… hi!'

'Hi!' Clarice glided towards him and embraced him as tightly as she had Dale, or perhaps even more so. 'Oh, it's been ages! How are you?'

'Good,' said Chip. 'Great. Oh! Okay,' as Clarice made so bold as to squeeze his tail, eliciting a slight frown from Dale. 'So what are you… what brings you…?'

'Well, I'm in town,' said Clarice, leaning back from Chip and rubbing both of his arms as she spoke, 'so obviously I came to see you guys. I thought maybe you'd offer me a drink and let me tell you all about it.'

'Absolutely,' said Dale, taking hold of Clarice's elbow and gently pulling her away from Chip. 'But first let's introduce you to our friends.'

'Oh, right!' said Chip. 'Clarice, this is Monty, Zipper and… and…'

'Gadget,' said Dale.

'Gadget! Right. Wowser.' Chip slapped a hand to his forehead and tried to gather his wits. 'So… come on, I'll get you something to drink. Are you coming, guys?'

'I think we'd better stay out here, Chipper,' said Monty. 'Give you three a chance to catch up.'

'Oh,' said Chip. 'Okay. Come on, Clarice.'

He shepherded her through to the kitchen. Dale did not follow them immediately, but stared after them while Monty, Gadget and Zipper looked enquiringly at him.

'This is so weird,' he said. 'I haven't thought about her in forever!'

'No need to ask who she is,' said Monty. 'Someone from a long time ago who's had a lasting effect on both of you.'

'I'll say,' said Gadget. 'Golly, Dale, I've never seen anything like it!'

Dale snapped out of his reverie and looked at her. 'You haven't?'

'Hadn't you better get in there?' said Monty, to nods of agreement from Zipper.

'Oh.' Dale glanced towards the kitchen. 'Yeah, I guess so.'

He went into the kitchen, and the other three Rangers dispersed. They caught up on a couple of hours' sleep, then continued to leave the three chipmunks to themselves for another hour or so. Then, after what they all seemed to think was a decent interval, they began to gravitate towards the kitchen, from which was coming a stream of high-pitched, very fast and incomprehensible chatter.

'Maybe we should leave them a little longer,' said Gadget.

'They've had long enough, love,' said Monty. 'Besides, it's getting on for lunchtime.'

They found the trio sitting round the table, collapsing with laughter and struggling not to spill their drinks out of their thimbles. Monty, Gadget and Zipper all experienced an odd feeling as they looked upon the scene. Here was a glimpse into a part of their two close friends' lives that they themselves would never really understand.

'Oh, hi!' said Clarice. 'Good, now I can meet you properly. Chip and Dale have told me all about you. So, Rescue Rangers, huh? That sounds… exciting.'

'It sure is,' said Monty. 'And worthwhile too. I'm glad I bumped into these two.'

'Me too,' said Gadget.

'Me too!' buzzed Zipper.

'It's nice that these guys have moved on since I last saw them,' said Clarice. 'I wasn't expecting it, somehow. Silly, really. I guess we've all changed since then.'

'Clarice left to pursue the stage,' said Chip. 'And now she's back to… well…'

'Pursue the stage,' said Dale.

'I certainly am,' said Clarice. 'I've been pretty successful on the small circuit, so now I'm back here with some experience under my belt. No more singing in seedy nightclubs for me, giving weirdoes their kicks! Oh… no offence, guys.'

'I should hope not, Clarice,' said Dale. 'After all, you invited us there yourself.'

'Yeah, that was fun,' said Clarice, with a giggle. Then, to the Zipper and the two mice, she said, 'These guys sometimes used to sing with me, you know.'

'That doesn't surprise me,' said Gadget. 'Sometimes they sing on cases.'

'Only if we have to,' said Chip.

'Really?' said Clarice. 'Well, that's great! I was thinking of asking if you wanted to get back together. We could be a trio of singing chipmunks.'

'Well, that's original,' Dale said with a laugh.

'But it is!' said Clarice. 'There's a gap in the market wide open for a mixed gender trio. With our vocal blend, we could take the concept to a whole new level. But I guess you're busy with your crime solving and everything.'

'I'm afraid so, Clarice,' said Chip. 'We were never serious about singing and stuff anyway, but we are serious about this.'

'Oh yes?' Clarice looked at Dale, rested her chin in her hand and leaned towards him. 'Are you serious about this, Dale?'

'Of course,' he said.

'Anyway,' said Chip, 'his girlfriend wouldn't like it if he went off to be a singer.'

Clarice slid away from Dale a little. Monty and Zipper exchanged a wearied look. Dale scowled.

'She's not my girlfriend,' he said. 'She's my, uh… hang gilding buddy.'

'Hang gliding?' Clarice's apparent interest in this took everyone by surprise. 'You do that, Dale?'

'Um… sometimes.'

'You mean you attach yourself to a kind of kite thing and jump off stuff?'

'Yeah,' said Dale. 'That's pretty much it.'

'And you don't do that?' Clarice turned to look at Chip, but stayed close to Dale.

'No,' said Chip. 'I have better things to do.'

'I'm sure you do,' said Clarice. She turned back to Dale. 'It would be fun if the three of us did sing together again, though. Just once, for old times' sake.'

'Well golly,' said Gadget, 'I'd sort of like to hear that.'

'So would I,' said Monty.

Zipper indicated that he was in agreement.

'We don't want to disappoint them, Chipper,' said Dale.

'Well,' said Chip, 'I'll think about it.'

'It can't be now, anyway,' said Clarice. 'I really have to be going - I've an important meeting to get to. I didn't tell you guys, did I? I got picked up by an agent after a performance the other day.'

'Wow, that's great!' said Dale.

'Yeah, it is,' said Chip. 'Congratulations. Where were you performing?'

'Oh,' said Clarice, 'some club. That's why I didn't invite you. It… well, it just wasn't a very nice place. I guess I sort of put off coming to see you until I had something to show for myself.'

'You didn't have to do that,' said Chip.

'Maybe not,' said Clarice, 'but I did it anyway. But listen, I'll want you to come and see me perform as soon as I get something good, okay? And bring your friends.'

'Count on it,' said Dale.

'Aww, you're the greatest,' said Clarice, smiling sweetly and batting her eyelashes. Then she got to her feet and gave Dale, who was still sitting, the most enormous hug. She wrapped her arms around his head and pressed her chest up against his ears. No one quite knew what to do with themselves, least of all Dale.

'Well,' said Gadget, 'good luck, Clarice. I hope you find something soon.'

'Oh, she will,' said Chip. 'She's really talented.'

It was obvious to everyone that Chip was hoping for a hug like Dale's, but he didn't get one. Instead Clarice put her hand on Dale's shoulder and said, 'Will you see me out, Dale?'

'Um.' Dale looked at Chip, then at Clarice. 'Okay.'

He stood up and escorted Clarice out of the room, looking utterly bewildered, while Chip stayed in his seat and glared after them.

'Old habits die hard, I guess,' said Monty. 'Are you all right, Chipper?'

'I just don't understand it,' said Chip. 'She never… like that…'

'No one looks more surprised than Dale,' said Gadget. 'Golly, all the girls are after him, aren't they?'

'Seems so,' said Monty. 'It's funny. When that Clarice first got here, she seemed more interested in you, Chip.'

'Actually,' said Gadget, 'I thought so too.'

'So did I!' said Chip. 'But then after all that, I thought I must have been imagining it. Oh, look, Casanova's back. I'm sure Foxglove would be very sorry to learn that she's only your hang gliding buddy.'

'Chip,' said Dale. 'Are we really going to start fighting over Clarice again?'

'Oh, I guess not.' All at once, Chip snapped out of it. 'We have to decide what we're going to do about Fat Cat. We definitely need to keep an eye on where Mepps was. We should fly out and look at the place every day.'

'Every day?' said Dale. 'Well, that sounds like a big fat waste of time.'

'We'd better do it anyway, Dale,' said Gadget. 'Just in case.'

Five days later, the place Mepps had been sent to hadn't changed a bit, and Fat Cat himself was still engrossed in the newspapers. He really seemed to be doing nothing at all besides reading, and running his casino as normal. Clarice had been quiet too, but nobody thought much of that. They assumed she was busy with this agent of hers, if they thought about her at all.

'Fat Cat's behaving very well, isn't he?' said Chip, as the Rangers re-entered their headquarters after a day of fruitless surveillance. 'Too well, in fact. He's definitely up to something.'

'But he's not doing whatever it is right now because he knows we're watching him,' said Dale. 'Mepps would have told him we followed him.'

'So what are you saying?' asked Chip. 'We should just leave him to it?'

'I'm sure Dale isn't saying that, Chip,' said Gadget. 'But maybe it wouldn't hurt to take the heat off for a few days.'

'Sounds good to me, Chipper,' said Monty. 'We can look for other cases, and if Fat Cat starts doing anything in the meantime, we can deal with it then.'

Chip saw the sense in this idea, and had to agree. The Rangers then went about their own business for a while, and met up again for their evening meal at half past six. When Dale entered the kitchen, he was clutching a piece of paper.

'Hey, Chip,' he said, handing the paper to his friend. 'Did you get one of these?'

Chip glanced at the piece of paper, and at once his face fell into a scowl.

'No,' he said.

'Oh!' Dale snatched the paper back, as though hoping to take back the action of giving the thing to Chip in the first place.

'What is it?' Monty crossed the room, took the sheet from Dale and read it out loud. ' "Dear Dale. Meet me tonight. Love, Clarice." Kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss. Crikey, that's a lot of kisses, Dale.'

'Why would you think she'd send one to Chip as well?' asked Gadget.

'Because that's what happened the last time I got a note like this,' said Dale. 'She, uh… used to do stuff like that.'

'Did she now?' said Monty. 'Well, that sounds like a nasty little game.'

'I'll just bet she's grown up a lot since then,' said Gadget. 'Well, she's only sent one note this time, anyway. It's not very specific, is it?' She took the note from Monty and looked at it. 'It doesn't say where she wants you to meet her, Dale.'

'I guess she wants me to go to where she's staying,' said Dale.

'How do you know where she's staying?' asked Chip.

'She told me when I saw her out the other day.'

'She what?'

Dale looked taken aback. 'It's no big deal, Chipper. She just… happened to mention it. I… I'm sure she didn't mean…'

'Oh, don't mind me, Dale,' said Chip, his tone softening. 'I'm just being jealous 'cos I don't have a note.'

'Oh.'

'Are you going to go?' said Monty.

'I guess.' Dale took the note back from Gadget and stared at it. 'It'd be rude not to. She's an old friend.'

'She clearly wants to be more than friends, Dale,' said Chip.

'Maybe not,' said Dale. 'Well, I guess I'll find out later. When exactly does "tonight" start, anyway?'

'I said it wasn't specific enough,' said Gadget.

'I'd go right now if I were you, pally,' said Monty. 'I should say that dinnertime officially qualifies as tonight.'

'Oh,' said Dale. 'Well… I guess I'll see you guys later, then.'

'Aren't you going to dress up?' asked Chip.

'As what?'

'As a respectable member of society. Last time you went to meet Clarice, you put on something nice.'

'Oh,' said Dale. 'Well, I don't think I will this time. I don't want to give her the wrong idea.'

'What wrong idea?' said Chip. 'You mean you're not…?'

'Oh, I don't know!'

With that, Dale dropped Clarice's note and fled from the room.