Disclaimer: I do not own FMA or it's characters. Thats all I have to say.
A/N: Hello, I hope you enjoy this story. There is a warning for character death and its somewhat disturbing too. Umm..I had more to say but I forgot so on we go!
Artistic Tendencies
I don't wish anyone to feel the way that I do right now. It's a most horrible feeling. You never want to see someone you love with another person.
I wasn't supposed to be home that day. We had been living together for a couple of months to cut the cost of living expenses. We had been friends for a while so when it was suggested it seemed to be a great idea. Until he actually moved in. He had taken interest in everything that I did. No one had ever done that. He had even brought me a turtle that he had found on his way home because he said that I was the only one he felt like it was safe with. It made me feel good to know that he had thought about me at least once while he was gone. That was when I realized that I was starting to look at him differently.
I remember wanting to tell him before things got any worse. But I was scared to. I had never been any good at telling people my feelings. I always felt that I was being selfish by telling them things that would only lead to change. When you do something like that you are basically forcing them to change a part of their life. So after thinking about it for a while I decided it would only cause more problems for him so I wasn't going to tell him.
It got harder for me. I had no idea what my silence would soon cost me.
I soon started to become obsessive. I found myself waiting by the window for him to return and when he did get home I would run so that he didn't know I was waiting. A few weeks ago he didn't get home until almost 4 in the morning. When he finally walked up the street, I noticed he was not alone. He was with her. I had seen her in the office frequently. She always walked by his desk flaunting everything she had. Sometimes she would drop things and bend over just enough to where he could get a good glimpse at what she had to offer. I hated her. She was a dirty whore. I couldn't figure out why he was so interested in her. She had nothing to offer. She would never be able to treat him the way he needed to be treated. She wasn't good enough for him at all.
After the 4 o clock incident, he started doing it more regularly. Sometime he wouldn't even come home. I know where he was. He was out with her. The winch that didn't deserved him by no means.
I started to harm myself to try to stop my feelings. It wasn't working but I did realize that if I thought bout her while I did it, it made me feel better.
One day, while I thought he had gone out with her again, I started to do it again. I don't remember much when I'm in that state but I do remember screaming. Then I heard his voice. He was telling me to let him in but I already had. I started to scream for him to let me in because he never did. That's all I wanted was to be let inside his heart. To be loved by him. He had busted down the door and grabbed me by the arm before I had a chance to do anymore to myself. A lot of stuff happened that night. He told me that I was like his best friend and he didn't want to loose me. He loved me then.
After that happened I felt better for a while and he would barely leave my sight. But once again, eventually he started to leave. So naturally I would wait up for him. That's when I saw her again. I couldn't believe it. Why would he choose her over me? There has to be something wrong with me. So I secretively started to hurt myself again. Before I would just do it all by myself. But now I wanted to watch them. I would get so angry. But I never did it too bad or else he would notice. That wouldn't do.
One day he had asked me if he might have been able to have the house to himself. I didn't mind if he was alone. I didn't want that filth in my house. I agreed to it though. I would do anything for him no matter. I was supposed to be gone by the time he got back at 6. But I was busy. I was in the bathroom when I heard them come in. I stopped what I was doing and listened to them walking around and talking. I couldn't handle it. The blade that I was holding was digging more and more into my skin. I could hear everything they were doing. I heard him ask her something and then I heard her reply. Soon after I could tell that things were getting pretty heated in there. By that time even in my state of incoherence, I could tell that my self-inflicted wounds would need stitched.
I could hear her moaning and saying his name. And soon my need for the cutting of flesh became more intense. I started to think about cutting her. Seeing her face when I slid the sharp blade down her check, ruining her face. Her screams when she found out how horrible she looked. Would he be mad at me? I didn't really care. I just wanted to cut her. No…kill her. He needed to get away from her and I could help. Then he would love me. I didn't realize what I was doing until I was creeping down the dark hallway into the bedroom. She had her smooth thighs resting on either side of his hips. She was riding him like a little pony making him emit sounds that he thought could never come from his mouth. Within seconds I was standing right next to them and they didn't even notice. He had his eyes closed and was breathing heavily from his mouth. She had her head back revealing her snowy white neck. The curvature of it was amazing. Almost like a painting. It was flawless but not for long.
I reached slowly up and grabbed a hand full of her hair making sure that my fingers were wrapped tightly around the soft locks. She immediately opened her eyes with a slight smile on her face. The way her expression changed almost instantly when she found out that instead of him it was me, completely soaked with my own blood, was to die for. She opened her mouth to scream but I was quicker. I quickly but smoothly brought the blade up to her throat and created a perfect cut into the flesh of her neck. She had no time to react. After all a struggle would of ruined the beauty of it. By then he had already opened his eyes and had plastered himself against the headboard. I felt bad for putting him in such a state of shock, but I had to do what I had to do. I still had her hair in my hand as we watched her slowly bleed to death. Right before the end she started to twitch so I gently laid her down and restrained her from doing so. I couldn't ruin my masterpiece.
When I looked up he was in total shock. It felt weird seeing him like this. He was supposed to be strong all the time. I never realized how much of a human he was. He was needy. That's why she was here. He wasn't able to appreciate good art when he saw it, evident from his facial expressions. He looked scared. He wasn't supposed to be scared.
I started to wonder what it was that I saw in him. He wasn't the perfect thing that I thought he was. He was actually nothing to me. Nothing. I started to get mad. He had lead me to believe that he was something more then what he really was. He lied.
I wanted to kill him for it.
I slowly walked towards him. He didn't even try to move. He was supposed to fight for his life! He didn't even move. I was furious. I launched myself on him and continued to stab him until I couldn't feel him moving even the slightest bit. When I got up and looked at him he looked absolutely wonderful. He was cut up from head to toe and it became quite a characteristic. I had just made another great piece of artwork.
I had moved her body over to him and posed them together. While looking at them I realized just how beautiful they were together. I smiled when I heard the police. Finally, I would have someone here to see if they like the display I had so generously created.
When the cops got there they were in total awe. Some of them even got sick it was so overwhelming. It was then I decided that I could do this more often. The colonel and his little boyfriend would look excellent like this.
That took me and locked me away from every piece of supply that I had to work with. I've been in here for a while. They say I'm completely psychotic. I turned one of my nurses into a sculpture soon after I got here. They weren't very happy. I guess I didn't do such a great job. Oh well.
There is one thing I regret, I never got to apologize to Havoc. Like I said before, I never wish anyone to feel as guilty as I do now. I made the man's life a living hell. You never want to see someone you love with another person. You tend to do stupid things and make rash decisions. What's worse is when you come to the realization that you never really did love them. You just hadn't found your place and were lonely. I want to say sorry to him and his girlfriend for being such asshole to them. Oh well, I guess I will see them tomorrow. They are going to create me into my very own piece of work. I'm very excited and I hope they do a good job. That reminds me, maybe Havoc and his girlfriend will consider the fact that what I have done to them could be a gift to the beginning of a wonderful relationship. After all…
They were my first and greatest masterpiece.
Lieutenant Cain Fury Aka Yokoshima A-tisuto
Psychiatric Ward
Cell # 617 Jacket number # 125698
USE EXTREME CAUTION! REQUIRES LEVEL 5 SECURITY AT ALL TIMES! DO NOT REMOVE
BONDS UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES!
Did you enjoy? A little strange don't you think? It's a new side of Fury! Review and tell me what you thing! Please! --Marie