Chapter 1

How the Mighty Have Fallen

"Tommy?"

The call echoed through the empty house and Haley shivered, dropping her grocery bags on the floor in a rustle of plastic to pull the front door closed behind her.

"Tommy?" she called again, a little louder this time.

Silence.

"Stubborn man..." it came out on a sigh, her shoulders dropping fractionally as she realized today was going to be another uphill battle. So what else was new?

Her mouth set in a thin line; she quickly pulled her hair back into the elastic band from her wrist, both already bearing marks from the many handles that had been digging into them. She gathered up the bags once more, struggling with their weight just as she had up the driveway. "Tommy!"

"In the kitchen," the stiff voice drifted from her destination and she tried not to wince at it as she hauled her burden through the living room.

"Hey," she greeted, dropping the bags in a heap next to the refrigerator and shaking her hands as the blood rushed back into them, "I brought groceries."

"I can see that."

Haley frowned at his back, noting the taunt shoulders as he hunched over the kitchen's island with a whiskey tumbler of orange juice...at least that had better be what was in there. One leg was wrapped around the leg of the bar stool he slouched on while the other dangled free. She knew he could feel her gaze, but other then that terse comment he made no move to acknowledge her presence. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"Tommy..."

"Don't."

The brusque order gave her pause. After a moment's consideration and another quiet sigh, she bent over the bags and started putting things away.

Tommy made no move to help.

It was only when she ventured to the breadbox to replace the moldy loaf she knew lurked inside and he shifted to keep his back to her did she realize what he was trying to hide. "Did you shave?"

He still didn't turn around, "Yes."

"I would have helped you with that..."

"I can do it."

"I know you can...but you always cut yourself." Haley moved closer to see what the damage was. The loss of his usual beard always meant the loss of some blood too and she dreaded the thought that he wouldn't look at her because it was bad this time. He batted her hand away as she reached for his face and that was when she saw it...

"Tommy, let me see your hand."

"No."

"Thomas Oliver..."

"Do NOT." He finally spun around and she backed away from the anger in his gaze. "Do not take that condescending tone with me, Haley. I get it from everyone else; I don't need it here, in my own home."

"But your hand..."

"I cut it, okay? I dropped a plate and cut my hand cleaning it up."

She took in the sloppy bandage barely wrapped around it, "Why didn't you call me?"

"Because I'm not an invalid!" he exploded, surging to his feet. "I can take care of myself and I don't need you at my beck and call to clean up every little mess I make!" He stalked closer with every word, "I...don't...need you! I can buy my own groceries and keep my own house and clean up my own damn plate!!!"

By the time he bit out the word "plate", Haley was backed against the counter with the marble digging into her back and his fury looming down on her. Something dangerous sparked in her eyes and she shoved his chest, "No! You're not an invalid. You're just a stubborn bastard who can't seem to get it through his thick skull that things are different!"

"I know things are different!!!" his voice rose even more if possible. "Every time I go to tie my shoes or wash the dishes I know!! I can't even—" he cut himself off and scowled down at her, "Nevermind..."

Haley watched him with clenched fists and a steely glare as he went back to his stool and hunched over the tumbler once more, taking a long swallow in a way that made her suspect all the more that there was something a lot "stronger" then orange juice inside. She cursed under her breath and turned her back on him as well, throwing things into the refrigerator with the force of her displeasure.

Snatching a rag from the stove and shooting another glare at the brooding man, she set about cleaning the scattered food off the counter.

Her hands stilled...finally seeing the items she seized with hard, angry actions.

Bread, stale but edible...lettuce, wilted but yes, fit for consumption...mayonnaise and mustard...an open package of cold cuts...her favorite brand of hot peppers...there was even a candle shoved behind the bag of bread. It hit her then…why he had bothered taking down real plates when paper or Styrofoam was so much easier.

"Tommy...were you trying to make us lunch?"

His jaw clenched but the telltale shimmer in the brown eyes that refused to meet hers betrayed the suppressed emotion.

Haley felt something inside shatter. "I'm so sorry..." he flinched away from the hands she rested on his shoulders and she bit her lip.

"God I'm pathetic." Tommy's husky voice had her blinking back tears.

"No...you're--"

"Stop. Just...stop." He shifted enough to look at her. Haley couldn't help but note the small cuts on his face, barely starting to scab over. "You were right. I can't shave without hurting myself. I can't even do something nice for you without screwing it up and then blowing up at you for something that wasn't your fault."

"But you tried..."

He turned away again, "That's not good enough."

She stood silent, helplessly watching him draw in on himself. Tentatively she sat down next to him, "Can I see your hand?"

He extended it without looking at her.

She turned his palm over and blinked, "Duct tape?"

Tommy shrugged fractionally.

"But how…"

"My teeth. That's how I tore it off before anyway."

"Resourceful." That was an understatement and she knew it. The things he managed to accomplish in this state still amazed her.

Tommy didn't bat an eye as she tugged off the makeshift bandage though Haley winced herself, knowing how much it had to hurt. She peered at the wound and grimaced, "There's still bits of ceramic in there."

"I know. I couldn't get it out..."

That something inside that broke just moments ago fractured even further at the quiet admission. The past six months had been about little else but proving he could function on his own power...take care of himself. To confess there was something he could no longer do was a terrible blow to his pride.

She patted his arm, knowing a comforting smile would be anything but. "I'll be right back."

Haley didn't really expect a reaction...so why did she still feel the sting of disappointment when he did nothing to acknowledge her slipping out of the kitchen and down the hall. To hell with Tommy coping...why wasn't she beyond this?

She went straight to the medicine cabinet above the bathroom sink, automatically putting away Tommy's razor before pulling out what she needed and sliding the glass closed again. He hadn't moved when she returned to the kitchen...his arm still extended across the island's marble counter. And he still didn't move as she used tweezers to dig the shards out of his palm.

Haley watched his face for any flicker to hint at what he was thinking, feeling. There was nothing. Just an empty stare directed away from her searching eyes. His fingers twitched when she dabbed antiseptic on the cut...that was it.

So this is what it took to bring down the mighty Thomas Oliver. All the megalomaniacs that tried and failed over the years to shatter his spirit...and in the end he self-destructed.

He hadn't given up or fallen into depression like many people in his position had done. He'd started out with a defiant spark in his eyes and every intention of going on with life like normal. He plowed through his physical therapy and faced every menial task with the same determination that made him a legendary ranger. Everyone thought he'd be fine. And for a time he was.

Haley gave the fresh bandage a final tug but did not release his hand. She cradled it between both of hers, running a thumb in circles over his calloused skin, reluctant to say anything.

The one thing that kept him going when he was a ranger was the one thing he didn't have now.

Hope.

This big bad wasn't going away, couldn't be defeated.

It was the little things that slowly chipped away at him. Forgetting...in a moment of distraction, and then the shame of something like a broken plate to snap him back to his altered reality. The frustration at himself and his inability that he pushed away, but it kept slithering back.

Haley started when Tommy's fingers tightened around hers, gaze flying to his face. He wasn't staring into space anymore, but he wasn't looking at her ether. His eyes closed and the tension left his shoulders, replaced by sagging weariness. Slowly, he slid forward and pillowed his head against his elbow with a deep sigh.

Haley wanted nothing more then to reach over and wrap her arms around him. But she knew better at this point, the well meaning comfort would only be an insult. He couldn't return the gesture. Not the way he wanted...

He couldn't bring himself to hug anyone since it happened.

So she just continued holding his hand, the gentle pressure where his fingers curled around hers saying everything he couldn't

TBC...