(Got this idea from a rivalry I have with my mom)
Batman vs. Superman
"You're so wrong, Finn; he is ten times better", Sam insisted as he walked down the hall with Finn to Glee practice.
"Dude, are you crazy? He can't even compare", scoffed Finn as they entered the choir room. "
He is too better", Sam insisted.
"He is not", Finn shot back at his blonde friend. This developed into a round of "is not, is too"s, much to the dismay of the other Glee clubbers.
"They have been doing this for two weeks now", Tina moaned to Mike.
"Try dealing with it in football practice", Mike replied.
"You think that's bad Mike? I actually live with one of them", Kurt added in a huff.
"I swear to God they should just run away together", Santana said crossing her legs indignantly.
"Wait, since when were Finn and Sam boyfriends? Kurt was right about Sam being gay?", asked Brittany.
"No, Brit. He wasn't right", Sam said annoyed.
"But I was right about your hair", Kurt added in a sing-song voice. Sam narrowed his eyes at Kurt.
"Can I ask what this fight is even about?", Mercedes asked.
"Sam can't be mature and admit Batman's better then Superman" Finn exclaimed.
"Correction. Finn can't admit that Superman is better than Batman", his rival interjected. Everyone looked at them dumbstruck.
"Are you two serious?", Artie said. Both boys just looked at everyone.
"Oh, sweet Jesus, they are serious" Mercedes responded. "Superman has great super powers, and all batman has are puny gadgets and a car", Sam argued.
"Batman has better villans. All superman has is a bald, rich guy and an imp that has an unpronouncable name. And never disrespect the Batmobile", Finn shot back with conviction.
"Batman's girlfriend is an s&m reject", Sam added
"Oh, like having Lois lane, the screaming wonder, is so great? She is such a victim", Finn countered.
"OH MY GOD, WILL BOTH OF YOU SHUT UP?" Rachel hollored standing up."You two have had a fight based on men in long underwear. This is what interrupts our make out sessions, Finn?"
Rachel realized what she said, and all the eyes of new directions were upon her. She gave out a nervous chuckle and sat down trying to avoid the many gazes.
"Anyway", Blaine said looking at the two boys, yet giving Rachel another look because he was surprised at what she'd said. "Guys, I don't think this is such a big deal. Can you try to tone it down for the sake of the club?"
Finn and Sam agreed with Blaine.
"Plus Spiderman is so much better", Blaine added.
"Excuse Me?", the once feuding boys said in shocked unison.
"Of course you'd like someone who shoots sticky webs", Santana said with a smirk.
"Shut up Santana; my boyfriend has a point", Kurt defended.
"No he doesn't, Kurt. Batman would kick Spiderman's red and blue ass", Finn chimed.
"Oh come on, Finn. Batman is lucky he has the money to fund his superhero escapades. Spiderman's gadgets are created on a photographer's salary, and they work too", Kurt shot back.
"You're my brother, Kurt. You're supposed to be on my side; you know the whole "blood is thicker than water" thing", Finn said feeling betrayed.
"Finn. You're my step-brother, first of all, so technically there is no blood. Second of all, if we are really getting into this, all three of you would know that Thor is the greatest."
'"Oh yeah, Kurt, because he's a God? Big whoop. Any idiot can use a hammer", Blaine hissed. Kurt gave an angered look to his boyfriend.
"Better than some stupid boy who dresses like an arachnid", he scoffed.
"You losers are crazy", Puck stepped in. "The Hulk is the most bad ass of them all, just like me". Puck flexed his muscles for emphasis.
"Please, Puck. Professor x is tops", Artie spoke up.
"This coming from his reincarnation", Santana said, pointing to Artie's chair. "Wonder woman is the greatest super hero" she added.
"You just want to get into her star spangled bikini," remarked Quinn.
"Oh! Queen Fabray has graced us with her two cents. Care to tell us who you think is the best superhero?" Santana spat.
"Archie", Quinn said.
"Girl, are you for real? He isn't even a superhero", Mercedes said.
"In his comics he is, super powers or no super powers". Quinn defended her claim.
"Well, we all know Black Canary is the best because of her amazing voice", Mercedes told everyone.
"Mercedes, you're crazy. Vagita and Goku are the greatest", Mike said, and Tina agreed. Everyone looked at them.
"What the hell? Is a Goku some kind of tree?", Kurt asked. "Besides that, what's a Vagita?"
"Sounds like a feminine hygiene product", Puck added. Both Tina and Mike had disgusted looks on their faces.
"Are we the only ones who read Manga?" Tina realized what she'd said when everyone looked confused.
"This is rediculous. We're fighting over people who live in comic books and ware capes", Rachel finally spoke up.
"Professor X doesn't ware a cape, Rachel", Artie explain. But he became silent when Rachel gave him a glare.
"Hello Kitty is the best", Brittany shouted.
"Britt? Sweetie? Hello ki- You know what? Never mind". Santana said patting her friend on the shoulder.
"As I was saying, this is pointless. So can we get to the task at hand?" Rachel jibed. "Your right, Babe. I'm sorry. We'll stop" Finn comceded, smiling.
"Thank you. Plus, any one who's anyone knows that Blade is the greatest". Everyone stopped what they were doing after hearing what Rachel had just said.
"What?", Rachel asked, staring at everyone who was staring at her.
"Rachel. You actually read and watch Blade? Gory, vampire killing blade?" Sam asked.
"I've got all his movies on blue ray and have most of the comics. What do you think?" she replied. At that moment, everyone started to argue and challenge each other. Their super hero was the best. This caused a loud ruckus in the room. Mr. Shue walked in and just managed to get everyone's attention.
"Kids, kids, kids, this is crazy. You're fighting over super heroes. Can we hold this till after practice?", their teacher asked. Everyone agreed and sat down.
"Plus, if we're talking about superhero greatness, Green lantern kicks the most ass."