"Father!" I called, my back to the door. I rolled the bright, red apple over in my hand a number of times before I eventually heard the creaking of the door.
"Yes, Regina?" my father says to me, as he walks into the room.
"I'll be going out for a time. I'll be back soon." I told him, heading towards the door.
"Where are you going, Regina?"
"I have business to attend to." I said to him. He glanced towards the apple in my hand.
"And the apple?" he asked me, one eyebrow raised.
"Am I not allowed a snack?" I asked him, feigning innocence.
Sometimes when I lie
I know you're on to me
I wasn't completely lying to him, I told myself. The apple was meant to be a snack... Just not for me. My father looked at me, a sort of suspicious expression evident on his face. He clearly understood what the apple was intended to do.
Sometimes I don't mind
How hateful that I can be
"Regina..." he said taking a few steps closer to me." Is that really necessary?"
I knew that he was not pleased with my plan of revenge on Snow White.
Sometimes I don't try
To make you happy
He never had approved of it, but I chose to ignore that fact. He stood by me anyways, and that is the only thing that mattered to me.
I don't know why I do
The things I do to you but
"Goodbye father." I told him, as I walked towards the door.
"Goodbye, Regina." I spared one last glance at him before I left. His expression was one of sadness, pain. The look on his face almost made me doubt what I was doing.
Sometimes I don't want to be better
Almost. I may be hurting many people through my actions or maybe just Snow
White, I thought to myself as I left the castle. Either way, I honestly don't care, as long as I get my revenge on Snow.
Sometimes I can't be put back together
I believe myself to be beyond repair. All I care about now is getting my revenge. At some point I realized, my true love is dead. My mother is his murderer. What do I have to lose, that I haven't lost already?
Sometimes I find it hard to believe
There's someone else who could be
Just as messed up as me
I truly am messed up. All of my time is spent trying to ruin Snow's life because of something she did as a child. Pathetic isn't it?
Sometimes I don't deny
That everything is wrong
But she took away all that I loved and now I will take away all that she loves.
At first, I used this as an excuse for what I was doing. A reason that what I was doing wasn't wrong. At this point, I've stopped bothering to deny it.
Sometimes I'd rather die
Than to admit it's my fault
At a time I had pondered the fact that my miserable life is not entirely her fault. I could've attempted to move on, at least. But that was long ago. Now, I am so far gone that I reject even the possibility of that.
Sometimes when you cry
I just don't care at all
I know that my father does not like what I've become. A monster. Evil. Obsessed with revenge and only revenge. Occasionally I try to make my father happy and act the way I used to. I've realized that it doesn't work, and at this point...
I don't even care.
I don't know why I do
The things I do to you but
Sometimes I don't want to be better
Sometimes I can't be put back together
Sometimes, I desperately wish that I could go back and change things. Put myself back together. But, of course, those kinds of thoughts might hinder my revenge.
So now, I choose instead to push those thoughts away.
Sometimes I find it hard to believe
There's someone else who could be
Just as messed up as me
I want someone to hurt
Like the way I hurt
All I truly want now is to see Snow in as much pain as I was when, because of her, my true love's heart was torn out of his chest and crushed to dust.
It's sick but it makes me feel better
Sometimes I can't hide
The demons that I face
Sometimes I don't deny
I'm sometimes sinner sometimes saint
Sometimes I don't want to be better
Everything is wrong forever
In my opinion, everything will be wrong for me until I get my revenge. But then what will that get me? Nothing will ever be right. Revenge won't bring Daniel back- no. I can't think like that. Revenge will make me feel better... Won't it?
Sometimes I can't be put back together
Sometimes it is gone forever
Daniel is gone forever, but does that mean that I shouldn't avenge him? That's what this revenge is about, isn't it?
Sometimes I find it hard to believe
There's someone else who could be
Just as messed up as me
There isn't anyone as messed up as me... I'm a monster. Truly evil. Despicable, that's what I am. But none of that matters. Only revenge matters. I looked down at the apple, rolling it over in my hand. Only revenge...
Just as messed up as me