February 6- Criminal Minds, Derek Morgan and Penelope Garcia: UST, cute pajamas and lumpy couches
Derek grunted as he tried to get comfortable on Penelope's lumpy couch. It was a great couch for sitting, warm and comfortable, but for sleeping it was a nightmare, it dipped in all the wrong places, and he kept hitting the metal back as he tried to find a spot that didn't make him crazy.
Of course, he could just get up and crawl into Pen's extremely comfortable bed. It would be so easy to cuddle up next to her, feel her warm body curve against his.
But he couldn't do that, he'd never survive it.
It was way too much of a temptation. It was hard enough staying here with her. He wanted to stay, wanted to protect her, be there for her nightmares, but….
It was slowly driving him crazy everyday. Before he'd just dreamed about her, in the dead of night, and in the morning he could pretend it never happened, but now…now he had images he couldn't ignore.
He knew how flimsy her pajamas were, how easily he could tear them off. He knew that she did her hair adorably even if she was just going to sleep, as if she was expecting someone might need her at 3 am and she'd have no time to do it. He knew what she smelled like in the morning as she glided past him into the shower.
And he knew what it was like to have her body pressed against his, her head tucked under his, her nails digging into his back as they hugged.
He had to stop thinking about it, he couldn't think about how good she felt, how perfect they fit together, because he wasn't ready.
And neither was she.
The shooting had woken him up, it became crystal clear to him that he loved Penelope Garcia and that he wanted her, and not just for a night, but for good.
He also new he wasn't prepared to get into a relationship right now. He'd come along way in the last year, confronting his…molester, admitting what had happened to him, going to therapy (which only Hotch and Pen knew about), but he wasn't there yet. He wasn't at the place he needed to be in a healthy, committed relationship.
And he couldn't give her anything less than that. He wouldn't.
Forgetting his own problems, the shooting had given him the chance to learn about Garcia, about her past, her parents, her insecurities. And he was fairly sure she wasn't any more ready for the two of them than he was. She still didn't believe in herself, in the fact that she was worthy of love. She was really just learning to trust and live again after her parents' death.
She wasn't ready. He wasn't ready.
But someday, he believed, they would be. No matter when it happened he knew that in the end he'd be with Penelope.
Until then, well…he'd learn to like the couch.