A tale of self insert, written with my dear friend, rupin. If you swear you've read this before, you're not crazy. It was on her account before.
Waterfall4242 epicallylate rupin.
Uhm, I'm going back through and editing these, and pretty much redoing most of it? Yeahhh.
We own nothing.

...

It was a dark and stormy night…actually, screw that. It was sunnier than the average Sunday afternoon in summer. But they wished it was dark and stormy because these two girls, they're awesome like that.

They sat on the bed in the cabin, both of them staring blankly at the wall, not saying anything. That is, they weren't saying anything until Shawna laughed, her dark red hair bouncing as she tried to stifle her laugh.

"What?" The other female, Phoenix, stared awkwardly at her friend.

Shawna looked at Phoenix, then at Phoenix's short brown hair. "Nothing. I just remembered something funny is all." She shrugged, then continued, "So I hear they have ice skating here in the winter. Hockey, anyone?"

"Oh yeah, because you know how great my ice skating skills are. I can jump in the air and land on my ass."

"I feel like we are forgetting something." Phoenix shook her head.

"We cleaned out the old house," the brown-haired one mumbled. Before Shawna could respond, there was a knock on the cabin door.

"It's too early." Shawna groaned.

"It's noon," Phoenix corrected, opening the door. A short man stood outside said door, and he was coughing violently.

"Swallowed that the wrong way," he cleared his throat and Shawna laughed. "Hi, I'm Pascal. I would just like to tell you that we will be at Waffle Island in a few minutes. That will be all." With that, he walked out, only to come running back in before Phoenix could close the door. "One more thing I should mention. When we're docking, please hold on," he advised. Phoenix raised an eyebrow.

"We're on a boat...mother fucker," Shawna told the man.

"Congratulations, Shawna!" her best friend yelled sarcastically.

Pascal walked out, shaking his head.

After about ten minutes, the girls heard a loud rapping at the door again. "We will be docking in a second. Hold on." Pascal then rushed out, going to hold on to something, they assumed. Shawna, being the egoist she was, decided to let pride and smugness take over, and refused to hold on to anything. Phoenix, the smarter of the two, sat on the small bed and held onto a handicap railing that was attached to the wall. As soon as they docked, Shawna began to regret her choice, falling to the ground face first. Phoenix started to laugh, and Shawna glared daggers at her.

"Well, we should get going, then." Phoenix grabbed her bags by the door, which had oddly stayed put during their wonderful docking. Shawna followed behind, heaving her one bag over her shoulder.

The duo walked onto the sand, their shoes sinking into the sand. "There's sand in my shoes," Shawna pointed out.

"Congratulations, Captain Obvious," Phoenix sneered.

"Thank you, Sargent Sarcasm. But no one asked you."

"And no one asked you."

"If I wanted my comeback, I'd wipe it off your mom's chin!"

Phoenix rolled her eyes. Shawna used the same comeback whenever she could.

Huffing, Phoenix lead the way to Town Square, to go find the mayor in Town Hall, where he instructed them to meet him over the phone the previous night. When they got there, Shawna opened the door to find a guy with blonde hair wearing plaid pants and a sweater vest, and started laughing. "What're you, head nerd?" He glared up from the papers he was working on, watching the girls high five each other. "I'm Shawna, and this is my best friend, Phoenix. Now where's the mayor?"

The blonde didn't answer for a minute, and Phoenix, always remembering her manners, stepped in front of Shawna. "What she means to say is, take us-"

"To your leader, loser!"

"Basically."

"Dad!" Gill called from his seat.

"Mayor's boy?" Shawna laughed. "Oh, that's so attractive," she scoffed. Phoenix choked, and Shawna followed her gaze. A large...man, walked out of one of the back room, a huge smile lighting up his friendly face.

"Why hello there girls! You must be Phoenix and Shawna. I'm Hamilton, the Mayor of Waffle Town!" He motioned for Gill to go, who proceeded to get up and walk up the stairs, following a sign that said library.

"Nerd." Shawna mumbled. However, Phoenix knew she was kidding. The red head loved to read.

"Girls, let me show you to the place you'll be staying at." He smiled, holding the door for them as they walked outside. They followed him out the door and around a couple of bends.

"This is some kind of joke, right?" Shawna deadpanned. Mayor Hamilton shook his head. The young girl glared at him. "You're fucking kidding me, right? It's dirty!" She gave Hamilton a terrified look. "And not to mention renovation. This is going to take a lot of work!" As she stared at the small, dilapidated shack muttering to herself, Phoenix turned to Hamilton.

"Thanks."

"You're welcome. Oh, and I think you should go meet everyone in town." With that, he walked quickly away. Phoenix watched him walk away, and could just imagine a few Oompa Loompas coming to roll him off to the juicer. She had to laugh at the thought, and got an odd look from Shawna.

"Well, we might as well get started cleaning up. I heard there's carpenters here, so they can upgrade it for us. I brought money for us to get started with."

"What money? Wasn't the reason we moved here because we were too broke to live in the city?"

"Uh.. don't worry about it." Shawna glanced suspiciously at Phoenix before walking inside, grimacing as she touched the door handle. Shawna could handle most. But dirt and bugs were not some of those things.

The inside wasn't so bad, and Shawna smiled to herself. "We can do some great things decorating in here!"

Thus started her Spring Cleaning mode, and Phoenix just sat back on the couch that was supplied, drifting off.

…

The next morning, Shawna got up to see Phoenix already up, still clad in her pajamas.

"Get ready. We're going grocery shopping," Shawna said, going into a room to change, coming back out only minutes later, fully ready. Phoenix never knew how she did that, but decided to not question it. They walked out the door, finding their way to the general store to get a little bit of grocery shopping done.

…

Shawna turned to Phoenix. "What kind of island named Waffle Town has no waffles? There's pancakes, but no waffles. Ridiculous."

"...You don't even eat breakfast. Why's it matter?"

"Because," Shawna whined, "I like putting strawberries and ice cream on top of a nice warm waffle. You should try it sometime."