Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of its characters. (Because if I did!...)

Author's Note: Yay! New fic! I absolutely love the Marauders so I decided to muster some courage and write a story about their time. It spans their last two years of Hogwarts and switches view points from the boys, Lily, and Snape. From the looks of it it's going to be pretty lengthy and I am going to make Lily's and James' relationship progress realistically and gradually.

Who's To Say?

Chapter 1

And you say we're too young but maybe you're too old to remember

And I try to pretend, but I just feel it when we're together

And if you don't believe me you never really knew us

You never really knew…

The subject of James Potter was mentally challenging for Lily Evans and usually resulted in a headache, anger, or both. This said topic was even more difficult to think about after what had occurred last week during OWLs and the many feelings with which it had left Lily.

Here she was on the Hogwarts Express going home for the summer at the end of her fifth year and, if she was perfectly honest with herself, she felt horrible. The end of the year was usually a celebratory time but Lily felt like doing anything but celebrate. What did she have to be excited about? The loss of a good friend? She envisioned a long, awkward summer at home with no one to spend it with now that she and Severus Snape were no longer on speaking terms.

It was hurtful for Lily to know that she and her close companion were no longer friends, and that he had shattered their bond with a single word. She had thought she knew him better than that, thought he was a genuinely good person under his murky exterior—is this not what she had constantly told her friends? And perhaps Severus still was a good person and had merely called her that awful name because he was embarrassed and panicked at that moment, not truly meaning it. But Lily could not get past it and did not feel she should have to. Severus was supposed to have been her best friend and friends did not shout slurs at friends, especially when the latter friends were trying to help. Lily had looked past Severus' immoral discrepancies countless times, telling herself his Slytherin friends were influencing him and that he would outgrow it. But he still had not, and to add insult to injury, he had called her, his best friends of years, a Mudblood. Lily could no longer look the other way; Severus had proven himself to not be the boy she had cared about.

It was a terrible feeling and she felt betrayed. Lily could only imagine what her friends and peers were saying when she was not around, that they had been right about Snape all along. And the self-dubbed Marauders must have had a field day all week long, especially James Potter. At the thought of this name she inwardly groaned, and the memory of the lake fiasco and Severus dangling in the air played in her mind for about the 10,000th time. Why did Potter and his stupid friend Black have to attack Severus when he had done nothing to them?! Their arrogance and all assuming manner was completely repulsive. And then why did Potter have to stand up for Lily, so sincerely, when Severus had uttered that foul word? That was not like his usual, self-absorbed self and she found it unsettling.

"Lily, I think you've been in here by yourself long enough!" a voice remarked as the compartment door opened. She looked to it and saw her good friend Dorcas Meadowes.

"Is it my fault you three left me? What do you want me to?" the red head replied.

"Come out and be social!" Dorcas commented, smiling. She was a rather short witch, a half blood, with dark hair that was styled into a bob and framed her pleasant face. She was also a fifth year Gryffindor like Lily and exuded lively confidence.

"I'm not really in the mood, Dorcas. And besides, the only ones I want to speak to are you three. Where did you run off anyway?"

"Alice is with Frank and Marlene wanted to talk OWLs with her Ravenclaw friends. Why she is still discussing those damned exams is beyond me!"

"And you?" questioned Lily.

"I was… noting the finer points of Quidditch with some of the wizards!" Dorcas innocently claimed. Lily smirked. For her friend to scold Marlene for discussing academics was hypocritical because Dorcas held the same passion for Quidditch! (She was also on the Gryffindor Quidditch team and had been for two years now).

"Then you all seem to be getting along without me just fine! I'm not needed. I've got prefect rounds soon anyway…" Lily informed.

"Yes, but you're wanted Lily!"

"Dorcas. Really. The thought of talking to multiple people is not really what I want to do right now."

Dorcas frowned slightly, looking at her friend.

"Are you still upset over this Snape issue?" she asked.

"If I am, I have every right to be Dorcas," Lily quietly noted, looking at the other witch, "He was my friend for years, since we were little. Before Hogwarts was even a part of my life."

"I know you two were close, Lily, but he is obviously not worth your grief! He thought nothing of calling you that horrid name!"

Lily gave a small nod but did not verbally reply. Dorcas could see that her friend truly was dejected and mentally kicked herself.

"Never mind what I said about coming out. I'll sit with you again," she said, walking in and taking a seat.

"Oh, Dorcas, don't feel obligated to stay. I know you were having a good time." Lily protested.

"And I can resume it here," smiled Dorcas.

"Resume what?" a witch questioned, coming into the compartment and shutting the door behind her.

"Nothing. Where were you?"

"The loo. Ugh, but it was such a headache!" Mary Macdonald answered, rolling her eyes and sitting next to Lily.

"How so?" wondered Lily, eyebrows raised. Mary was the last fifth year Gryffindor witch in their dormitory and was a Muggleborn like Lily. She had curly black hair and a rather serious demeanor.

"Two sixth years decided to magic the floor into quicksand right near the bathrooms and a couple of second and third years got caught in it. The Head Boy and Girl had to come and help sort it all out so it took much longer than anticipated," she reported.

"And you stayed the entire time?" Dorcas wondered.

"Of course! I helped! I really had to go!," Mary answered. Lily laughed lightly and Dorcas smiled, "Where's Alice? She was here when I left."

"Oh, off with Frank Longbottom." Lily told her. Mary smirked knowingly and then said:

"She really does fancy him, doesn't she? They've been going out for a month and she's been with him nearly all four weeks!"

"It's fresh," Dorcas interjected, grinning, "What can you say? Wait 'til September comes—they'll have seen each other so much during the summer they'll be knackered out."

The compartment door then opened once more and laughter greeted the girls' ears. (Lily's time alone was clearly finished). Marlene McKinnon strolled into the small room smiling and the companion she had brought with her stood in the doorway. Marlene was a tall witch with long, wavy, copper brown hair that sprawled across her back and gleamed. She came from a pureblood wizarding family and was one of the most amicable, optimistic people at Hogwarts. The person in the doorway was in fact a wizard and not a witch, but did happen to be a fifth year Gryffindor. He was fairly tall and had a head of brown hair.

"You're back," Dorcas began, looking at Marlene as she sat next to her, "Done boring people with OWLs talk?" The smile that had illuminated Marlene's face left momentarily, replaced by a frown. Lily shook her head, hiding a small smile, before turning to the wizard.

"Hello Remus!" she greeted.

"Lily," he smiled in return, "Mary. Dorcas."

"All right?" Dorcas pondered.

"Just fine, thanks."

"Remus walked me here because he needed to get you Lily." Marlene informed.

"Yes. The Head Boy and Girl want us to start our rounds now it seems. Matthew said something about the bathrooms, magic, and prefects doing more…" Remus Lupin added.

"D'you see?" Mary said triumphantly.

"Okay then," Lily stated, standing up, "I'll be back in a bit." He moved aside to let her pass first and they started down the corridor.

Lily had been slightly shocked when she had received her prefect badge in the mail last summer. She had spent her entire fourth year thinking that Marlene was the obvious choice for prefect even though both girls were exemplary students, so it had been somewhat of a surprise, though she accepted it happily. Consequently, she had known Remus was going to get it without much question. His only possible competition had been Frank, and Frank, while a great student, was quite absentminded and disorganized at times.

"So are you looking forward to the holiday?" Remus asked.

"Mmm… not in particular," she admitted.

"Really? Why?"

"I have nothing to look forward to, really. Well, I suppose I can count on my sister ignoring me and not having my friends around. That'll be great." Lily commented, smiling sadly.

"Do you really have no one?" he inquired.

"I used to…" she responded. Remus looked at her then straight ahead, feeling guilty for some strange reason. He knew she meant Snape; she had told him during their fourth year that Snape lived near her.

"But, my parents did say they were planning a trip to New Zealand in August so I do have that to be happy about," Lily noted after a brief period of silence, smiling, "What about you Remus?"

"Well, no trips to New Zealand," he grinned, "But one of the Ma… one of my mates, invited me over for two weeks in July."

Lily scrunched up her face slightly, knowing he was referring to one of the Marauders. As much as she liked Remus, she could not stand his friends and rarely hid it. She had wondered many times in the past five years what they had in common or what he saw in them, for he was nothing like them.

"Remus," started Lily, figuring now was the perfect time to ask him her old question, "Why do you spend your time with Potter and Black?" He quickly looked at her sideways and stuffed his hands in his pockets, his face beginning to show signs of discomfort.

"I mean, you are—"

"Nothing like them? I know," he finished.

"Then why—"

"Because they are wonderful friends, Lily." Remus told her softly.

"Are they?" she challenged.

"Yes," he replied firmly, looking at her with conviction. He then sighed wearily, "I know what they do is completely wrong sometimes. I'm very aware of it."

"A lot of times." Lily muttered.

"But unless someone takes the time to look past the surface, to actually get to know them, then… it's hard to explain."

She did not answer and appeared to be in deep thought, looking ahead and frowning.

"Look Lily. What James and Sirius did down by the lake was just uncalled for. It was wrong. Snape… Severus, didn't deserve it. I should've put a stop to it, as a prefect and their friend. I hadn't gotten the chance to really talk to you about it this past week, but, I'm so sorry," he explained.

"You don't have to apologize Remus and don't apologize for them. They should've had the decency to do it themselves and it shouldn't have been to me. Severus, on the other hand…. As cruel as they were to him Remus, it let me see his true colors and just how cruel he is. He made me feel so stupid." Lily said.

"Well, he obviously has no idea what he's lost." Remus remarked, smiling faintly. She looked at him appreciatively, her green eyes bright.

Their rounds lasted half an hour and without much incidence. As they prepared to go back to their respective compartments and let the Hufflepuff prefects begin their shift, Remus noted that they would be pulling into King's Cross soon enough.

"Yes, a little less than half an hour. I'll change out of my robes in a bit."

"I'll see you off the train then Lily," he remarked, his compartment coming up first.

"See you," she responded, moving onto her own and not daring to look inside of his, least she make eye contact with them.

In another nearby room, a blond boy sitting on one of the seats with his legs thrown haughtily in front of him noticed Lily walk by.

"Oh, oh! Your ex-girlfriend just walked by Severus! Not going to go out and greet her?" he remarked, smirking wickedly and looking at the boy to whom he was talking. Sixteen year old Severus Snape sat in the corner by the window on the opposite seat of the blond boy, looking sour and forlorn all at the same time. He had been staring out the window but upon being addressed he turned to his fellow fifth year Slytherin and replied:

"Shut up, Rosier."

He appeared angry now. Evan Rosier continued to smirk.

"Well, we are angry! Using surnames and what have you!" he said.

"I hope you're not sulking over filth like that, Snape. Her lot is the first to go you when he is triumphant." Walton Mulciber added, sitting next to Rosier. He had brown hair, was a large, muscular boy, and a fifth year Slytherin as well.

"Sulk?" Severus repeated, eyebrows raised and arms folded.

"Well we know of the friendship you two had. You wouldn't say you were rather close, Severus?" Derrick Avery commented, looking at him evenly. (He occupied the same seat as Snape). Avery was a tall, slender boy with dark hair and a very shrewd demeanor, also a fifth year Slytherin.

"It's ended now so what does it matter?" Severus retorted defiantly.

"And it's a good thing it has, even if it did take too long to happen. You don't need to keep company with Mudbloods or other low life!" Rosier told him. The Snape boy glared at him.

"We just don't want you to get lost, Severus. Begin to lose your focus?" Avery remarked, smiling darkly.

"Your concern means the world to me, Derrick," Severus said sarcastically, "But I don't need it. I know what I'm doing." He went back to his window watching. Mulciber glanced at Avery.

Severus' dorm mates, and Housemates at that, seemed to have an understanding: while they could bring up his disintegrated relationship with Lily (to a certain extent), they could not bring up the incident by the lake. A third year who happened to be one of Regulus Black's friends made the mistake of openly laughing at Severus and taunting him for what the Marauders had done, trying to win clout in his House. Not caring about the consequences or age difference, Snape made the boy sprout an extra leg before spinning him in the air upside down very violently. He ended the show by placing a nasty hex on the third year; after that, the incident was not talked about again by anyone.

But the sole thing currently dominating Severus' mind was that he had ruined everything with Lily with one word. Since it had happened he had been miserable, although he was skilled at not letting this show to his Slytherin companions. Lily had been the only person in his life who genuinely cared about him and was able to see past his icy exterior, the only person with whom he felt comfortable sharing certain parts of himself. Severus would have done anything for her and instead he had verbally slapped her in the face because he had reacted poorly to being humiliated. He had attacked Lily because his own pride had been attacked. This was a poor excuse, yes, but it was the sad truth. Severus had been cornered and, with such a large crowd watching, felt fury and embarrassment he had never known before. As a result, he had lashed out at anything in his path, and it just so happened Lily had been in it, trying to defend him….

Potter and Black. Snape's face twisted into a hateful scowl as he continued to peer outside. Those two were the reason for all of this, the reason he had been made a laughing stock and the reason Lily would no longer speak to him! They thought they could get away with anything because a few idiots at Hogwarts worshipped the ground their disgusting feet walked on! Well Severus absolutely abhorred them, especially Potter, and the werewolf and Pettigrew coward were not far off. The lake had been the very last straw—Severus was completely determined to find something on those four and make them suffer the way he had suffered at their hands countless times. This entire fifth year they had been hiding something, doing something that was wrong… the Slytherin knew it, and he would get them back with it.

But for now, Severus had Lily to think about and what he could say to make her see how truly sorry he was. Even if it took all summer, he was adamant in getting her to speak to him once more. He could not lose Lily.

When Remus entered his very loud compartment ringing laughter filled the air. This was a common occurrence, however, and he did not bother to ask what the joke had been.

"Frank is still gone?" he inquired, sitting down on the same seat as his friend with the mused hair and glasses.

"I would be too if I had a permanent snogging partner!" Sirius Black replied, arms folded and positioned on the opposite bench along with the shortest wizard of the four.

"They're called 'girlfriends', Padfoot. I know you're allergic to the name but if you say it enough times I'm sure you'll start to get over it!" James Potter quipped, grinning, arms behind his head. Remus found himself laughing along with Peter Pettigrew.

"You mean they really do exist?" Sirius answered in mock awe. There was more laughter.

"So! Moony! How is Evans doing?" James wondered, turning to Remus and changing the subject. He usually questioned Remus about Lily since he was the only Marauder she'd willingly talk to, unless it was to insult, deny or scold.

"She's all right. I asked her about her summer… she's still upset about the Snape thing," he informed. James gave a slight frown.

"Right," he noted, sounding a bit put out.

"When is she going to get over it? We did her a favor." Sirius remarked. Remus looked at him incredulously then responded:

"It happened last week, not a year ago! She's not going to get over it like that. And you attacked Severus Snape, who was her friend!"

"Don't remind me." James darkly stated, brows furrowed.

"Yes, a friend who called her a Mudblood, thereby finally letting her see his true, slimy self! We opened her eyes—that's a favor," contended Sirius.

"This is true," his best friend added, brightening up once again.

"So you don't care that you attacked him out of boredom?" Remus dryly asked. Sirius, arms folded, swayed with the motion of the train and shrugged.

"It's Snivellus," he simply said.

"All right, why are we wasting our precious breath on him? Enough! I think we can all agree he's a waste of life," interjected James. Peter sniggered but the Lupin boy said reflectively:

"I just think statements like that are the reason Lily isn't very fond of you."

James looked at him, mouth slightly ajar. He then closed it and furrowed his brow, fuming morosely. Sirius glanced at him.

"Moony, you are ruining the mood in here! We do not need a guilt trip right now—the term is over!" Sirius admonished.

"Sorry," he grumbled, looking away. There was silence.

"Well… w-we can look forward to James' place next month! Snape free! Just the Marauders." Peter told them looking from one to the other, trying to make them feel better.

"He speaks the truth. And since Mr. and Mrs. Potter just adore us, we can get away with practically anything!" Sirius answered, grinning.

"Devising wonderful new plans to leave the Marauder signature all around Hogwarts, for Filch to sort out!" James added, smiling wickedly. Remus found a smile twitching his lips despite himself.

"And maybe we can practice perfecting our new found… skills, more. Privately, of course! I'm still having a bit of trouble." Peter noted thoughtfully. He was referring to the boys' achievement of successfully becoming Animagi that school year.

"You're a rat, Wormtail. Is it so difficult?" Sirius remarked.

The door of the compartment then slid open and in walked Frank Longbottom, their fifth dorm mate. He was tall and lean with light brown hair that was always combed back, and currently had a wide grin plastered on his face.

"Back already Frank?" James questioned happily.

"Yes, well, Alice and I had a great time talking, but we thought it'd be best to get back," he replied, sitting down. Sirius snorted loudly.

"Talking. Right," he said.

"Wish I could 'talk' with Evans." James noted. His friends laughed.

In a short matter of time, the Hogwarts Express had pulled into the station and all of the young witches and wizards departed from it with their belongings. They said their goodbyes to one another with promises of letters and visits before leaving with their families to begin the start of summer.

"Like I said Lily, I'll ask my parents about having you and Marlene round so you're not dying all holiday!," Dorcas said as the two hugged quickly, "And I'll write of course!"

"Thanks. I'll really need it this summer!" the red head stated, hugging Marlene next. They had already said their farewells to Mary, who was already gone, and Alice, who was saying goodbye to her boyfriend.

"Take care for now Lily!" Marlene instructed.

"See you!" Lily waved as her two friends walked to their nearby families and she prepared to turn to hers. In the next moment, Lily's eyes had accidentally locked with someone else's close by: a wizard with black hair. His best friend was right beside him babbling away; they appeared to have just departed from their other friends, and they were en route to greet an older, married wizarding couple.

When James felt Lily return the gaze and saw her looking at him, an excited grin broke across his face. He winked at her. Lily, realizing she was making eye contact with James Potter, felt an unpleasant jolt. She glowered at him pointedly before turning sharply on her heel towards her parents.

As Mr. and Mrs. Evans engulfed their daughter with hugs, kisses and hellos, Lily noticed that her sister Petunia was absent once more. (She had not been there at the beginning of fifth year to see her sister off, either). Lily should have expected this, and did, but there was still a small part of her that was wistful for the relationship they once had. Conversely, what she did not notice was a sullen Severus Snape being led away by his mother a few yards off. He glanced at Lily once before preparing to disappear onto the other side of the platform.

A/N: First chapter down. Reviews are gladly always welcomed!