This has been in my mind for a couple of weeks and I just couldn't let it go.
It's Kate and Rick's second Christmas, so season 6-ish. Based on the song 'All I want for Christmas is you' by Mariah Carey. No spoilers. And yes, it's a bit dramatic at first, but it gets better towards the end. Mistakes are all mine.
Enjoy!
Disclaimer: I don't own anything.
All I want for Christmas
December 22
Kate stared at her apartment door; the very one Rick had just slammed shut behind him in anger. She was pretty mad herself, too. But as she thought about it she realized that she had no right to be. Not really. It was mostly her fault, after all.
She went over to the couch and sat down, guilt washing over her. Kate realized more and more that it really was her fault. Oh god, what had she done? She'd really screwed up now, hadn't she?
She knew Castle would never cheat on her, that he wasn't the playboy anymore who he used to be. And while he could be an immature, egotistical, self-centered jackass sometimes, he was also sweet and caring. And of course their relationship meant something to her. Hell, it meant the world to her. If only she'd told him any of that. But she hadn't, she'd only yelled a bunch of horrible things.
She had to fix this. She didn't know how yet, but she had to.
She called him, but of course he didn't answer. Kate decided to let him cool off for a bit, and went to the precinct, trying to focus on something else for a while.
Ryan and Esposito figured it out the minute she got there. Her nearly permanent shadow not there and the sad expression on her face? It didn't take a genius to figure out what happened. They wanted to know all about it, but Kate shook her head, silently telling them not to comment on it.
Meanwhile…
Castle hadn't even bothered to wait for a cab. He just marched right on towards his loft. It gave him some time to think.
He really thought they'd been doing great. They had been together for about year and a half now and of course they'd had their arguments, but this topped it all. He couldn't believe how she could possibly care so little about him. About them. And maybe she hadn't meant all of the things she'd said, but somewhere there had to be some hint of truth hidden in them.
His thinking was interrupted by his cell phone ringing. Without looking, he knew who it was. He took it out of his pocket, confirmed his suspicions by a simple glance and ignored the call. He really wasn't up for that now. He had reached his building and took the stairs, taking two steps at a time, fuelled by his anger. He reached his loft in no time and angrily jammed the key in the lock. But when he saw all the decorations, the ones she had helped them with, his anger disappeared and sadness took over. He couldn't help but think how much fun they'd had decorating his loft and how much fun they were supposed to have during Christmas.
And most importantly, he couldn't stop thinking about the gift he'd gotten her.
Xxx
December 24
The 22nd and the 23rd had gone by very slowly for both of them. Kate kept on calling and texting Castle, but he never answered or replied. And now, on the 24th, Kate had nearly lost all of her hope. She'd called and texted him so many times, even gone to his loft once or twice, but nothing had worked.
It was nearing 5pm, and she was still at the precinct. Within a couple of minutes, her shift would end and she'd have 2 weeks off. However, since she no longer had someone to celebrate the holidays with, she seriously considered volunteering to work.
Just then, a Christmas song was on the radio. It was 'All I want for Christmas is you' by Mariah Carey. Oh, how many times she had played that song on her guitar when she was younger. And then it hit her. She knew what she had to do. It was her last hope, and if that didn't work, so be it.
Kate packed her bag, shut down her computer and got out of the 12th as fast as she could. It had been a long time after all and she'd need some practice.
Xxx
Alexis and his mother hadn't arrived yet and Kate… She probably wasn't coming. Castle would love to think that she cared enough and he had always believed so, but now he wasn't so sure anymore.
It was as if everything now became clearer. Kate, the love of his life, might not come over for Christmas. She might not come back at all. Castle sank down onto the couch as the realization dawned on him. He and Kate could be done forever. How the hell would he go through that? He put his head in his hands as he tried to stop the sob that was coming, to stop thinking in worst-case-scenario.
Just then, he thought he heard a guitar. Castle sat up straight, thinking he had imagined it, but then he heard it again. Someone was playing a guitar, and he or she was outside his front door. It sounded like 'All I want for Christmas is you'. Then, a soft voice began to sing. It was Kate's voice.
I don't want a lot for Christmas
There is just one thing I need
I don't care about the presents
Underneath the Christmas tree
I just want you for my own
More than you would ever know
Make wish come true
All I want for Christmas is you
The guitar playing got stronger now, and Castle stood up, walking towards the front door, not yet opening it. This couldn't be, right? He stood still, listening as Kate continued singing, slightly faster than before.
I don't want a lot for Christmas
There is just one thing I need
And I don't care about the presents
Underneath the Christmas tree
I don't need to hang my stocking
There upon the fireplace
Santa Claus won't make me happy
With a toy on Christmas day
I just want you for my own
More than you would ever know
Make my wish come true
All I want for Christmas is you
The song was slower than the Mariah Carey version, but it was way more beautiful, and there was something… fragile, maybe. Castle walked on towards the front door and sat down with his back against it, unknowingly mimicking Kate's position as she sat on the other side of the door playing the guitar and singing the song she'd done before already but never for him, hoping this would all turn out okay.
I won't ask for much this Christmas
I won't even wish for snow
I just want to keep on waiting
Underneath the mistletoe
I won't make a list and send it
To the North Pole for St. Nick
I won't even stay awake
To hear those magic reindeer click
Cause I just want you here tonight
Holding onto me so tight
What more can I do?
Oh baby, all I want for Christmas is you
This was not just Kate singing some song to him. No, she was letting him know exactly how she felt, in a better way than he would ever come up with.
All the lights shining so brightly everywhere
And the sound of children's laughter fills the air
And everyone is singing
I hear those sleigh bells ringing
Santa won't you bring me the one I really need
Won't you please bring my baby to me?
Oh I don't want a lot for Christmas
This is all I'm asking for
I just wanna see my baby
Standing right outside my door
It got slower again now, and Castle felt every single word cut through him, the honesty breaking his heart.
Oh I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true
Baby, all I want for Christmas is you
All I want for Christmas
Is you
In those last couple of words, so beautiful, so soft, so fragile, he could feel her true emotions, her just how much she meant it. The tears he'd had in his eyes now flowed freely over his cheeks.
On the other side of the door
Kate took a deep breath as her emotions got the better of her. Then, she stood up and put her guitar back in the case, busying herself while waiting to hear his front door open. But it didn't. She knew he was home, she'd heard him walking. But the door still didn't open. Kate stood and took a deep breath, but this time she couldn't keep the tears from falling. She started to walk towards the elevator, crying silently. She was heartbroken and lost, and she had no idea what to do next.
His soft voice from behind her stopped her.
"Kate."
She turned around and walked back towards him, no more words needed. When she reached his door, she put her guitar down and before she fully faced him again, his arms were wrapped around her tight.
For a couple of minutes they just stood there, not saying anything, just letting the last tears flow.
Castle pulled back, smoothing his thumb over Kate's cheek, wiping a tear away.
"Let's go inside," he said and picked up her guitar. He placed it inside and waited for Kate to follow him. Once they were both inside, he pulled her with him towards the couch and they sat down. Castle took her hands in his, seeming not able to not touch her.
"I'm sorry." They then both said at the same time. Before Castle could say anything else, she removed one of her hands from his and put her finger over his lips, effectively silencing him. She removed them and started talking.
"No. You shouldn't be sorry. I should. And I am. What I said two days ago… I had no right to say any of it. I was just… I was angry and I said things I shouldn't have. And you should know that I didn't mean any of it. I love you, Rick, and our relationship means the world to me. Know that, okay? Because I love you and I wouldn't ever want to give this up."
Castle squeezed the hand he was still holding and smiled. "I know. And I love you too, Kate. Always have, always will. No matter what happens."
She gave him a smile back and they just sat there in a comfortable silence.
That was, until they heard someone put their key in the lock. They simultaneously turned their heads towards the door and soon saw Alexis and Martha coming through, both carrying food and presents. The couple stood up and waited for the two redheads to put their stuff down.
Alexis and Martha were both surprised to see Kate, knowing about the fight, but Alexis recovered quickly and headed towards Kate, hugging her.
"I knew you'd come back," Alexis whispered. She pulled back and smiled. "Merry Christmas, Kate."
Kate smiled too. "Merry Christmas, Alexis."
Castle stood watching this small exchange, happy to see it.
Xxx
After some more hugs, the food was put into the oven and further prepared. About an hour later, everyone was seated at the dining table. They had a lovely dinner, Kate and Rick continuously holding each other's hands, softly touching backs and sharing smiles which lead to Alexis and Martha smiling as well.
Xxx
A little after dinner, it had been time for the presents. Everyone had gotten great things, including Kate, but Castle's gift had really touched her. It was a collection of photos, all put together in one frame. All of their friends and family were included. Some pictures featured only two or three people, like the ones with Rick and Kate or Martha and Alexis; others featured a whole group, like the one with Lanie, Esposito, Ryan, Jenny, Rick and Kate. All the pictures had been edited in such a way it looked like a real piece of art. But what touched Kate the most were the pictures with her mom in it. One was just Jim and Johanna; two others included herself as well.
Kate stroked her finger over a picture with her mom. She felt tears welling up in her eyes.
"Thank you, Rick," she whispered. "It's beautiful. And mom… You made her blend right in. That means a lot to me."
She put the big frame down on the table and wrapped her arms around Castle and hugged him tightly. For a little while, they just sat there. No one was talking; only soft Christmas music could be heard from the radio.
"Move in with me," Castle then suddenly whispered.
Kate pulled back immediately. "What?"
"Move in with me," Castle repeated, his voice sounding stronger and more confident now.
Kate still didn't answer. Castle took her hands in his and sighed.
"Look, Kate, we've been together for year and a half now, longer if you ask other people. I loved every single second of it, and I wouldn't trade it for anything else. But I… I want more. I want to see your stuff mixed with mine, I want to wake up to your gorgeous face every morning, and I want you here… Always, through our ups and downs. I want you to call this home. Because this is where you belong, Kate. Right here. So, move in with me."
Not for the first time that evening, tears sprung in Kate's eyes and she nodded.
"Yes. Yes, I'll move in with you, Rick. Of course I will." She looked into his eyes, hazel melting with blue.
"Well kiddos, I hate to break up this gorgeous moment, but could you help Alexis and I clean all this paper up? I gotta be somewhere soon."
The happy couple turned their heads, a bit embarrassed they'd forgotten about the other people in the room.
"Sorry Martha, of course we will," Kate said.
With the four of them, they cleaned up pretty quickly. Martha and Alexis than put on their coats, both needing to leave.
Castle wrapped one arm around Kate's waist and pulled her into his side.
Martha had already left, Alexis was about to.
"Hey dad?" She said.
"Yes, pumpkin?" Castle answered.
Alexis pointed to the ceiling above her dad and Kate and smiled. "Mistletoe." Then she went out the door and shut it behind her.
Kate and Rick both looked up and then back to each other. They leaned in and kissed, knowing this was just one of the mistletoe kisses from many more to follow.
The end.
Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed this. Reviews would be appreciated.
Merry Christmas to you all!
-xxx-