Story: Finding Faith
Author: CrystalSaffron
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine, I'm just borrowing them for my own nefarious purposes! Haha, not really, but they do belong to C.S. Lewis.
Description: One shot of how I would have liked a scene in the Last Battle to go. It's AU but I think Susan deserved a better ending then she got, though she does deserve to suffer a bit for how she's acted, she didn't deserve that ending. So here's my POV.

When he looked at the girl, woman really, who was carefully applying rouge in the mirror he almost didn't recognize her. She looked like a stranger; was a stranger really. With her fake, perfect laughter and the darkly shadowed eyes he could almost say truthfully that he did not know that woman. Part of him wanted to say he didn't know her at all. It was as if his sister was dead anyway.

She noticed him staring in the mirror and frowned, eyes at once serious and glassy. Dead eyes. Hopeless eyes. But then that Cheshire-cat smile was back on her face and she turned to face him in the gorgeous navy dress that their mother had given to her. He didn't know why their mother encouraged her, outwardly she praised her daughter's social success, but there were times where he could see their mother sadly looking at a picture of when they were all younger. Younger and happier.

"Oh really, sometimes you look at me like the world is falling apart." She said, tucking a stray piece of hair back into its rigid up-do. He remembered when her hair used to fall freely down to her knees.

"Maybe it is." He muttered, leaning against the banister.

"What was that?" She asked, applying even more makeup to her face. He wanted to tell her that she looked like a clown. She had always looked more beautiful without any makeup or trappings at all. All she had needed was a smile back then.

But maybe that was the issue; she didn't even have that anymore. He wondered if Aslan would have let her stay if he knew this is what was going to happen to her. If he had known she was going to turn out like this.

"Nevermind." He sighed, pushing off the banister to stand next to her.

Maybe this was the whole point. It was all a matter of faith, right?

"Why won't you come to the party with me? A lot of my friends have expressed an interest in meeting you and we'd have such a fabulous time."

He shuddered slightly at the thought of being pawed at those vapid and thoughtless girls. But the thought of watching his beloved, once gentle and once the most beautiful creature in an entire land, melting over those pompous and so-called 'gentlemen' bothered him the most.

"Why don't you come with us to the train station? I'm sure Lucy would love to see you, as well as Peter. You know he has to get back to University soon."

A moment. A single grain of sand of time he saw the façade crack and his glorious sister, gentle sister, majestic sister break through. Her face was one of absolute grief and was completely heartbreaking. The Queen in her could be locked away, but couldn't be washed away completely, as much as she might hope. A small part of her still believed.

In a second the cherry red smile was back and she added the finishing touch of perfume.

"But I could never miss this party, it's the most important social highlight of the season and I just have to be there."

A wounded, but tired look met her eyes in the mirror.

"Even more important than your family?"

Her eyes were suddenly frigid. "What do I have to do with a family that continues to believe in fairytales?"

Everything. His mind responded. But out loud he responded differently, "I suppose nothing. I suppose our faith is silly and outdated."

She smiled that hated smile at him and turned around again to praise him, but as she met his eyes, those eyes who had smiled at her, looked gently at her, held concern for her, held love for her, she forgot what she was about to say.

He looked brokenly at her. "But it's what we believe, and we can't just abandon it as you have."

He looked at her as if looking at a stranger, and she suddenly felt very cold. A shiver swept over her as she thought of never seeing those thoughtful eyes again, or hearing Lucy's laugh or feeling the comfort of Peter's hug. She had felt loved, but now all she ever felt was cold. Empty.

He gazed at her for one more moment, and then sighed and shook his head, apparently not finding what he was looking for. He started to walk towards the door and her eyes followed his every moment. With his hand on the handle he stopped and, without turning around, softly spoke.

"Goodbye, Su."

Su. No one ever called her Su anymore. Her new friends always called her Susan or Suzzy, but never Su. She watched helplessly, desperately as he opened the door and stepped out into the rain, the door clicking behind him with an air of finality.

A sudden seizing in her chest stopped her breathe for a long moment and when she could breathe again she realized she was gasping. A couple seconds later and she attempted to compose herself, grabbing the first makeup brush she saw to apply more powder to her face. As she went to find the powder, her eyes fell upon the small lion statue that Lucy had given her for her last birthday. Normally she put it away, except for when Lucy came so that way she wouldn't be upset, but she had forgotten to put away after last time.

The eyes of the lion looked at her strangely disapproving at her and she shuddered and looked at the mirror. Suddenly she saw an image of herself looking old and worn out, with makeup caked on her face and tear tracks marring her visage. She looked sad. She looked lonely. She looked lost.

Throwing the powder down and forgetting everything as she ran to the door and threw it open, she barely remembered to grab a coat as she dashed down the steps. She didn't even stop to lock or close the door, just ran like a madwoman down the street, her gorgeous silk dress ruined by the rain and her hair undone. And her makeup, the layers and hours of detail, ran in rivulets down her face, and she didn't pay it a moments regard.

She saw his back, hunched and defeated, as he was about to step into a cab. Seized by a moment of panic she ran faster and screamed his name in desperation.

"EDMUND! EDMUND PLEASE WAIT! EDMUND DON'T LEAVE!" He stopped getting into the cab and turned to her direction, startled at her appearance and demeanor.

"Su, what-" But whatever he was about to say was abruptly cut off as she threw herself into his arms, tears intermingling with the rain.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. Please forgive me, I just couldn't believe, I was so hurt. Please forgive me, I'm so sorry, so sorry. Just don't leave, please I'm so sorry!" She babbled on and on until Edmund stopped her and looked at her.

She was a complete mess, hair in her face, black makeup streaming down her face, face red from running and her outfit a mess, but she hadn't looked more beautiful in years.

He smiled at her and she tentatively smiled back, her blue eyes begging for forgiveness.

He kissed her lightly on the forehead and pulled her towards the cab that was patiently waiting.

"I forgive you. We forgive you." He said simply, pulling her in the cab where she sat close to him and leaned on his arm like she hadn't done in years, when they were older.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you." She kept murmuring, a fervent prayer to him and to anyone who would listen.

And as they drove towards the train station where they would meet up with the rest of their family, Edmund couldn't help but feel a deep sense of relief and thankfulness towards the Great Lion who he knew had saved his sister.

Loved it, hated it? Want to throw me off a bridge, let me know!