Author Note: This is a sequel/spin off from my last three fics (Trying To Forget, No Other Way, Through The Dark). I originally said NO MORE and ended it when I ended Through The Dark. But within hours my mind was racing, ideas were flying at me from all angles and I don't know if any of you have come across plot bunnies, but they were really beating up the work bunnies that were trying to get me back on track with my degree work. I won't update this story as much as I updated the rest, I will make sure I don't do that because I need to work hard for the next 8 weeks and then I'm off away, so well I'm going to attempt to get this story done and dusted by the middle of June, but in the meantime I can't be updating millions of times a day, so just to warn you all.
This is from a mixed point of view, rather than switching the views and it's more related to Katie with a sideline of Naomily in there.
Disclaimer: I don't own Skins, but I did write this story.
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The blood soaked the white cotton sheet, deep red seeping through the material, searching for every last inch of white it could find. The pain was immense. The cramping dug into her stomach, picking at the edges as though a knife was cutting tiny holes in the skin, letting the blood ooze out. It had been six days. But the pain was still present, invading her mind in every waking hour. She was tired. No, she was exhausted from feeling the pain that wasn't really there. Except that it was. It wasn't caused by the cramping in her stomach or the blood that had surrounded her, it wasn't caused by that night when she went to bed with a little bit of pain in her side and woke up to her whole life being ripped apart. It was caused by the loss, by the words that had been said, floated into the air like they meant nothing. But they didn't mean nothing to Katie Fitch.
"Miscarriage," was the first one. The doctor had said it in such a way that she knew it had been said too often in that same room.
"Too much blood loss, too much damage," came after, the words hit her hard, knocking her for six, sending questions flying through her brain about what it would mean for the future.
"Probably wont be able to conceive," the final nail in the coffin, the words that answered every question she'd hoped to ignore.
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The zip from the sofa cushion dug into her face, it hurt, but she left it there. The pain of the blunt edges rearranging her skin was little comparison to the bigger pain that was still clouding her existence. The television was on, the room was the same as it usually was. But she wasn't paying attention to the talking box and it didn't feel the same.
"Cup of tea?" Howard asked, sitting beside her, brushing the hair from her face as though to comfort her. She just shook her head, knowing that she was pushing him away by her silence.
The kettle boiled and Howard poured himself a drink. It was hot, too hot as he gulped it down, barely noticing the burning sensation in his throat. He stood in the doorway to the lounge, watching as his girl lay there, broken. He wanted to hold her, he wanted to do something to take away her pain. But she wouldn't let him and even if he tried, he knew that nothing would change the fact that they had lost their baby, lost their only chance to have a child. A lump in his throat travelled to his eyes and he retreated to the kitchen where he leant against the work surface and let his heart empty in a flood of tears.
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There was a distant knock at the door. Katie listened carefully as Howard answered the door, the voices sounded so far away despite only being on the other side of the wall.
"Katie?"
A voice was calling out to her; it was familiar, it was comforting. She looked up as Emily walked into the room, her red hair cut slightly shorter than usual, her usually smiling face was dull and concerned. A lump formed in her throat as she realised that Howard had told her.
"Why didn't you call me?" she asked, her voice wavering.
It took all of Katie's energy to pull herself up into a seated position and form words.
"You were on holiday,"
"I would have got the first flight home," she cried out.
It was heartbreaking to see her sister sat there, her eyes hollow, her usually painted face looked dull and uncared for. She moved across the room, not pausing to say anything more as she sat beside her twin. Her arms reached up around her shoulders and after a moment of resistance, Katie sunk into Emily's arms. The silence was filled by sobs as her body shook with tears, letting out the grief she'd been holding in.
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The room had gone quiet again when Katie had lay back down on the sofa, closing her tired, red eyes. Emily brushed her hair gently with her hand as Katie's breathing levelled out and she fell into a slumber. It was hard to watch her usually stable sister break down, the lack of words she spoke and the general change in her being. She stayed with her for a while, waiting until she knew she was well gone, before Emily pulled herself off the sofa and went to find Howard who was entertaining Naomi in the kitchen.
"Did I hear her crying?" Howard asked, his voice almost as broken as Katie's.
Emily nodded her head, struggling to find the words she wanted to comfort her brother-in-law.
"Howie said she's been in there ever since it happened," Naomi muttered, filling the silence the only way she knew how.
"I thought these doctors could fix anything these days," Emily snapped, "How could they let it get that bad?"
Howard's voice was laced with tears as he spoke, "It wasn't their fault, they did everything they could, but there was some infection or a tear or something."
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The house had gone quiet; Katie was asleep on the sofa and Howard had gone up to his room get some rest. Emily sat at the kitchen table as Naomi cooked some pasta. It smelled great, but Emily didn't think she could stomach the taste.
"I can put it in the fridge, Howard and Katie can eat it tomorrow," she informed Emily, but she wasn't even listening.
Naomi took a deep breath and turned down the pan, before sitting down opposite Emily, intertwining their fingers.
She didn't know what to say, or what to do, so she just said the first thing to come to mind, "We should go home soon,"
"No, I need to stay," Emily cried, her eyes filling with tears, urgency in her voice.
"Okay, okay, we can stay," Naomi mumbled, stroking her shoulder.
"Why can't this be like the other time?" Emily asked, her voice tiny.
"I don't know," Naomi sighed, reaching over and pulling her into her arms.
"If it was just a miscarriage then she'd be okay, she'd get through it like the first one. Why can't it fucking be the same?"
Naomi took a deep breath, trying to find the words to comfort her love.
"Sometimes bad things happen and we don't know why, there's no reason,"
Emily felt herself snapping, "I don't fucking case about reasons or bad things, I just case about Katie,"
The words were harsh and Emily meant them, but she didn't mean to snap at Naomi, she was just trying to help.
"I'm sorry," she whispered.
Naomi was holding her tightly again, arms that usually made Emily feel alive wrapped around her, comforting her as best as they could. She was angry, she was feeling pain for Katie and she was taking out her frustration on the girl she loved. But Emily knew that it didn't matter, because Naomi understood.
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Author Note: Thank you for reading, I am curious to know your thoughts on the story since it's obviously not in the usual falling in love, sex, drugs, rock and roll that is common in the Skins world. So please press the review button and let me know!
