TAKE IT ALL
Didn't I give it all?
Tried my best
Gave you everything I had
Everything and no less
"Lily! Lily, I'm sorry, I never meant to—" Snape began eagerly as he saw the angry and upset figure of Lily Evans walk towards him in the dark corridor. Lily cut him off with a withering glare from her brilliant green eyes.
She pressed her lips together before deigning to reply. "Why'd you do it? In front of EVERYONE, no less. You SAID it didn't matter what your parentage was, back when we were kids. You've changed, Severus."
Severus was nearly begging now, practically on his knees wanting mercy. "I didn't mean to say it, it's just—" He left off, not knowing what to say. How could this be happening? He blamed James Potter. If it hadn't been for his humiliation on the school grounds, Lily would never have stood up for him and he wouldn't have had to insult her.
Snape frankly didn't even know why he did it. All he knew was that he'd called his best friend, the love of his life, a "Mudblood" and she hadn't spoken to him for days. And know, when they were speaking, she showed no sign of forgiveness.
"That it slipped out? Ugh! Severus, you're being an idiot. I mean, really." Lily crossed her arms angrily. "I bet those creepy friends of yours told you to do it. Did you hear what they tried to do to Mary the other day? They're in with the Dark Arts, Sev... I don't like them. Why do you hang out with them, anyway?"
Severus tried not to smile at Lily using his old nickname. Rather, he tried to think of an answer to her question, tried to ignore the stabbing pains in his chest and the uncomfortable feeling in his gut—a mixture of heartbreak...and guilt.
I didn't do it right
I let you down
Maybe you got too used to
Having me around
"Lily, I—I—they're cool, okay? And the Dark Arts... they're really, really interesting. I'm going to be a real Death Eater one—"
"THAT'S DESPICABLE!" Lily shouted. "DO YOU KNOW WHAT THEY DO TO PEOPLE? I can't believe you, Snape, wanting to be a real Death Eater. You-Know-Who kills people, and you want to join him? No wonder my friends all hate you." Lily left off there, feeling a little bit guilty for pulling the "hate" card, but angry still with her old friend. Didn't he know that Voldemort was hurting people? How could he want to DO that?
"Lily, I'm sorry, it's just... that's my life now. You've got to have some sympathy, I mean, look at that Potter boy you like, he's going around hurting people all the time." Snape raised his eyebrows, waiting apprehensively for a reply.
"I most certainly do NOT like that arrogant toe rag. He thinks everyone else is worse than him. But that's better than wanting to join the most evil wizard of all time!"
"Look, maybe you and I have different priorities now, but—"
"I get it, Severus, You've chosen your way. I've chosen mine."
And with that, Lily Evans stalked off.
Still, how can you walk away
From all my tears?
It's gonna be an empty road
Without you right here
Tell me is this over?
Is this really it?
You're giving up so easily
Thought you cared more than this
Snape leaned back against the brick wall. Idiot, he berated himself. He sank to the floor and sat in his pool of torchlight, growing cold. Suddenly inspiration struck. "Lily!" he cried, loudly enough for her retreating figure to hear. Finally, socially awkward Severus Snape had thought of another thing to say.
Lily turned, her eyes still full of defiant fire, her lips still pressed tight and her forehead still lined. Snape smiled internally. How he loved that fire, even as it was directed at him.
"What do you want, Severus? I thought this conversation was over." She scowled, waiting for him to make a comeback.
I will change if I must
Slow down and bring it home, I will adjust
Oh if only you knew
Everything I do is for you
Snape took a deep breath, ready to take the plunge. "Why can't you give me a second chance, Lily? Everyone else gets one. I promise... I'll give it all up. I won't ever call you a... Muggle born... again. Please." Snape could have kicked himself; he sounded like he was grovelling.
"I've given you enough second chances, Snape." Snape cringed at Lily using his hated last name. "You're never going to change. I should've seen it sooner."
Snape's shoulders slumped. It was a long shot, but he had hoped that asking would work. He should have known better. Once Lily Evans got an idea in her head, it was hard to dislodge. She wasn't going to forgive him.
"I thought we were friends." He said dully, just so that this last conversation with Lily would last just a little bit longer.
Lily bit her lip and swallowed before answering. "We were friends. But people change, Severus, and sometimes there are mistakes made that can't be fixed. Sometimes people just can't deal with each other anymore; it doesn't work out."
Snape nodded, but really, he didn't understand.
So go on and take it,
Take it all with you
Don't look back
On this crumbling fool
Just take it all
With my love
"Goodbye, Severus."
He didn't reply, something he would regret the rest of his life.
Lily walked away.
Just take it all
With my love...