Leibestraum

Chapter One

Franz Liszt

"Jesus fuck. Fucking Sollux always bragging about getting ass from his stupid boyfriend," You rebuke, falling back into the cream couch. Slowly sinking in, you continue your soliloquy. "What's so special about him, anyway? Is it because of his money? His looks? His charm? I just don't understand..." You trail off, eyes moving their way up the white wall toward the alpine ceiling. The crystals dangling from their aerial chandelier drip with dusk light, gingerly swaying to and fro. With fingertips grazing against your scalp, between jet black threads of carotene, you sigh. Ever since you moved out of your apartment you shared with that dimwit you call your best friend, you've been utterly depressed; looking for potential partners here and there. Sexual partners, of course. You're not ready for a fucking relationship, hell no.

The eventide light fades before you take notice. Your thoughts had consumed you long enough to completely take your attention away from the crepuscular glow, beckoning the darkness. Left with nothing left as assistance to see but the illumination of the muted television, you continue to stir more thoughts into the mixing pot of emotions. What is this? What is that? How is this? How is that? What if I did this? What would happen? Question upon question stack themselves up, one atop the other, in your blue mind.

Finally, you come to a conclusion. What will be your emotional remedy. What can take your mind off of things...

are that low of a person, you think to yourself as you stand stiffly. Letting go of the hand of common sense, you make your way out to the white marble, double staircase, taking the left ascending archway to the upper level. With each pat of the foot upon anew stone step, your gut begs you to stop. What you're doing is wrong, it screams and you know it's right. But, because you are a stubborn little bastard, you continue your trek upward.

Once you get to the hall leading to your destination, you halt. You can faintly hear Notturno No. 3 "Leibestraum" by Franz Liszt spilling it's way into the hallway. God, how you love classical music. The music crawling toward you only pulls you in more; it draws you closer to the door, whispering to you 'come to me...come to me...' sweetly. It's pianic tone reassures you, tells you that it's alright...it's okay...

Come to me...

Your feet stop before the white door and hands gingerly grasp the brass doorknob to his bedroom. The music fades, coming to an end, as you step into the moonlit room. But it begins again, replaying it's sweet tunes.

Come to me...

Stop! Your gut continues to scream, but it's no use.

The way the moonlight caresses his body makes you lose your breath and you search for it. Body trembling, steps matching tempo, you reach his king sized bed. You feel one hand, then another, work their way to crawl you up onto the bed, sinking into the soft, feather filled comforter. His body shifts and you to freeze mid-creep, but to your luck it was simply a stir; nothing more. A ginger sigh escapes his sleeping lips as he settles back into the dough-like mattress.

The sweet lullaby begins to climax as you crawl atop his benumbed body, removing the white silk coverlets and exposing his toned, almost still figure. Only his chest moves slightly, expanding and contracting with long, soft breaths.

You exhale, your breath quivering. How many times have you thought of this cinerio over the past few months? Ten, maybe twenty times? But why does it keep running through your mind? It's not like you have any feelings for your housemate. So...why has this been the only thing on your mind? Maybe you're hormones are getting the best of you these days. It wouldn't come as any surprise to you, considering you haven't had sexual relation with any one in about half a year.

It's the cadence of the flowing music that beckons you toward the unconscious body until you finally reach him. You straddle his hips, almost instantly leaning in to nip at the man's neck. Once again, he stirs, but you can't help but not give a damn at this point. This beautiful body is already under yours, exposed, open... You choke back moans tickling at the back of your throat. Just touching his radiant form gets you going.

"Mmnnn..." the weary man groans, shifting under you.

"Shhh..." you coo under your breath, sliding your hands up his bare chest and to his jaw line to cup his face in your hands. You've already unintentionally begun to grind yours hips against his in attempt to invigorate his limp body.

"Wh-what're..." He rubs at his eyes. "What're you doing...?" His voice is low and raspy, rough, thick. He sits up, still rubbing his eyes, but your lips do not cease. They continue their trek in leaving light patches of red, trailing further down his body. Until finally, they reach his clothed over manhood. The only thing between you and it, is the other's dark purple briefs the man wears, but those are quickly rid of as you're lips' journey ends and begins a new.

Once he has taken account and registered in his wringed mind what the hell you've done and are about to do, he grabs you by the head, abruptly, "Karkat!" and pulls your chin up to look him in the eyes.

He's hard to see in the dim light, but you can still make out his features. "Gamzee,"is all you can falter.

"What the motherfuck do you think you're doing there?" He practically yells it.

Wow. Gamzee is usually so calm and relaxed. For everything. "Are you sober...?"

"Yes, I'm fucking sober! I don't smoke in the middle of the god damned night!"

Holy shit he's a totally different person when he's not high.

Nothing will come out of your mouth. It's been completely closed off by the lack of preparation. This is not what you had expected to happen, at all. You figured he'd either stay asleep or at least wake up halfway through it and be too engrossed to kick you off of him.

"Karkat!"

Hesitation takes over before you are finally able to speak. You swallow hard. "Go back to sleep." Another dry gulp.

"What- why?" He sounds irritated above all things.

"Because, I fucking said so, alright? Lie back down" You're sitting up now, pressing your hands to his chest, attempting to push him back down.

"Give me a reason why." His tone is now sturn. He won't budge.

May as well tell him why. "I..." you trail off, searching for the right words in your corrupted mind. "I want to ride you."

You're such a fucking idiot.

There is a long silence strung between the two of you. The only sound engulfing the room is the music, which has once again started over.

"You want to...what?" He sounds baffled.

You sit up, now, shaking your head and looking down at your lap. "There doesn't have to be any emotion involved, I just want to get Sollux off my mind."

"And you think having sex with me will help?"

You think about this for a moment before finally deciding "Yes. It will."

(( Fuck. I'm sorry. I know I need to be getting to Chapter 3 of TWOFO (The Wonders of Flipping Out) but I can't think of a damn thing for. I really need some ideas. Gimmie some ideas! If you haven't read it already, and you like Solkat, then go read it. If not, then it's just Sol and Kar as college kids who share a flat.

GIVE ME IDEAS! I'M HELPLESS!

-Bug))