"Three doughnuts, a cup of coffee with triple sugar and whole milk, a pop tart and an energy drink." Stephanie rattled off tapping her fingers as she spoke. "It's not that much."
"Babe."
She could almost see his eyes fighting to roll back into his head.
"Seriously. I'm an adult. I eat what I want." Her hands crossed defensively over her chest as she widened her stance. "I don't eat rabbit food like you do. I actually enjoy eating. I would die if I had to eat like you every day."
"Stephanie, you're being dramatic." He chuckled, shaking his head at her adamant declaration. "I didn't even say anything about this." He waved his hand toward her kitchen counters they were standing in front of.
"You were thinking it." She huffed, turning her back to him and stomped into her living room. He looked around the kitchen at the explosion of fast food and candy wrappers, empty coffee cups with solidified sugared milk, bowls of cereal and ramen noodles and beer bottles. "And another thing…"
Ranger watched with amusement as she continued her tirade. Honestly, he wasn't really listening but watching her face and body as it tensed and twitched with her annoyance. Words like "unrealistic" and "pressuring" and "none of your business" swam around and around her dialogue.
"Stephanie." His tone was firm and succeeded with stopping her in her tracks; her mouth shut tersely. He rose his eyebrows waiting to see if she was really done or if she was just amusing him. After a moment, he decided that he could proceed. "Did you even hear what I asked you?"
"Well…I mean you just stroll into MY apartment whenever you want. You can't expect me to have this place spotless all the time. And to make a big deal about my.."
"STEPH!" He shouted, making her jump. Taking a deep breath he slid one of his hands down his face and around to the back of his neck. Her posture had changed the moment he raised his voice. Her shoulders slumped and came forward, her hands were clamped together and she didn't make eye contact; she was cowering away from him. He hated when he yelled at her because of her reaction. He knew that his voice was strong and that it can be rather intimidating, but he never wanted to scare her. "I'm sorry I yelled." He whispered, shaking his head and chastising himself internally.
She sniffed and shook her head.
"Babe." Scooping her into his arms, he whispered in Spanish all the words that he was too afraid to say to her. He felt her relax and curl her arms around his waist. "Would you like me to ask you again?"
She nodded against his chest, not looking up at him.
"Would you like to come to my mother's house for dinner? It's her birthday this weekend and she is requesting that I bring you." His breath tickled her neck as he spoke and stirred that unquenchable heat that always surrounded his presence. "You don't have to if you don't want to, but I would love it if you would join me."
Tilting her head back, she looked at his face. His smile caused her breath to catch in her chest and she couldn't help but to smile back. His hand slipped up and swept a curl from her face, cupping her cheek.
"You want me to go?" She asked timidly, her eyes dancing over his face searching for any sign of his true feelings.
"I want you with me always." He laughed softly and pressed a kiss to her forehead. She could have sworn that her heart stopped and it showed on her face. "Steph, you know that I love you. I've never denied that. Why else would I bug you all the time?"
"Entertainment?" The words flew out of her mouth before she could even stop them. His smile waivered. "Shit, I didn't mean to say that."
"It's okay, I deserve that." He sighed and unwound himself from her, taking her by the hand to the sofa in the living room. "Maybe it's time we finally sat down and squashed all this shit and get down to what we both want."
She sat down on the sofa and watched as he pulled the coffee table toward her and sit down. They were face to face, knee to knee. Her anxiety skyrocketed and doubt and fear flooded her body.
"You make me nervous." She blurted out, once again before she could stop herself. He nodded and took her hand, pressing his lips to it and curling it into his.
"I know I do." His eyes burned into hers. Normally, looking into his eyes this intimately involved less clothing and more sweating. "Can I ask you something?"
"You can always ask me anything." She smiled rubbing her thumb over his fingers laced with hers.
"Am I worth it?" He swallowed and finally let his guard down. His eyes burned with insecurity and hope. His face was anxious and beautiful and strong and loving all at the same time. Reaching up, she caressed his face; her heart fluttering as his eyes closed momentarily and leaned toward her touch.
"You are worth more than I could ever afford." She finally spoke, her voice thick and soft.
"There is a question that you have wanted me to answer for years. It's probably time for me to finally answer it." He took a deep breath and looked into her eyes more focused than he ever has before. "You question what you are to me and I don't blame you. You landed into my lap all those years ago and my entire world was flipped upside down."
Her face fell and he swore under his breath. "I don't mean it like that. I really suck at talking, Steph."
"I could have told you that."
"Smart ass."
"Do you want to know who you are to me?" She smiled as he nodded. "You know you are my best friend. I know that you will always be there for me no matter what. I would do anything for you, even if it meant that I would suffer because of it. Every day that I get to be with you is the best day of my life, even the really crappy ones. You are my hero and my cheerleader. You don't tell me I'm a screw up or a loser and you make me want to be a better person."
"Babe." He pulled her into his arms, and took her place on the sofa with her sitting on his lap. His mouth crashed on to hers, arms and hands desperately seeking contact. The kiss slowed, and stopped their foreheads pressed softly together. "What if I asked if I could keep you?"
"What?"
"I can't get married again. Not right now anyway. I have always said that I don't do relationships and technically that hasn't changed, but I can't stop wanting you in my life. I want to see you when I wake up in the morning, and fall asleep with you curled around me. I want to eat every meal with you, even if it's pizza or subs every night. I want to celebrate holidays and birthdays together and even go to family dinner on Sunday at your mother's house. I want you to drive my car, wear my shirt and claim me as yours." He took another deep breath and continued. "I want you to be mine and mine alone. I could spend the rest of my life sharing you with someone else, but I want you all to myself. If it was between having you in any capacity or not at all I will choose to be in the wings. I just need to be near you."
"Ranger, I…"
"If you don't want that, we can forget this whole conversation. We can go on like we have and I will accept it." He leaned back and took her face in his hands. "Can I keep you?"
"You already have me." She whispered. Even through the tears that were blurring her vision she could see his face light up more than she has ever seen.
"I love you." He pressed his lips to hers, whispering over and over again of his love.
"I love you, too."
