Life on Mars

A small tribute to the late and great David Bowie, based on his song "Life on Mars." Song lyrics follow this one-shot so you can see the inspiration (I recommend listening to the song while you read). XMFC post-Cuba pre-DOFP, AU, told from Emma Frost's POV. No relation to my other stories. Telepathic conversations/thoughts in italics.


What a god-awful small affair, Emma sighed as she crossed her arms and leaned against the doorway, languidly gazing into the Brotherhood's living room. Erik, Angel, and Janos were seated on the ancient couch in front of the team's black and white television, bickering over TV stations and who controlled the remote. She could hear Mystique humming to herself from the nearby kitchen, and soon the smell of hot butter and salt wafted into the room, permeating the air. A quick survey of the room showed that Azazel was nowhere to be seen. Typical, thought the white mutant in annoyance, he always finds a way out of Erik's silly attempts at "team bonding." As if hearing her thoughts, Erik glanced at Emma from the couch, frowning.

You don't have to join us, you know, Erik thought loudly in Emma's direction, startling the white mutant from her own observations. It was merely a suggestion. Emma met her leader's clandestine comment with an arched eyebrow. Inward, she chided herself for being lazy and leaving her mind open too long. While Erik wasn't able to read her thoughts, he had seen that Emma had been scanning the collective thoughts of the room. In the short time Erik lived with Charles, he had become so good at projecting his thoughts that sometimes she swore that Erik could read minds as well as control metal. Emma sighed and waved her hand in dismissal as she walked into the room proper.

"No, it's fine. I was just…thinking." Emma spoke out loud as she took a seat at the table behind the couch. As Emma sat, Mystique entered the room carrying a large bowl of popcorn. The blue girl put the bowl on the table and took a seat across from the white mutant. Janos spun around from the couch to face Mystique, holding up his and Angel's empty bowl and shaking it, showing that they had no more popcorn. Mystique merely smirked as she put a handful of her popcorn in her mouth and pointed towards the kitchen shrugging, implying that Janos could make his own popcorn if he wanted some. The Latin youth glowered at her and Emma absentmindedly took a handful of Mystique's popcorn and looked towards the television.

At least our seats have a clear view without having to be stuck sitting on that gross old couch. Emma met Mystique's mischievous amber eyes across the table as she smiled. Emma was rather fond of Mystique; the blue mutant's former life with her brother made her apt at having telepathic conversations, and Emma very much enjoyed having someone to talk to who understood how to use her mutation.

"Ooo, how about this one?" Angel had gained control of the remote and was flipping through the channels as rapidly as she and Janos spoke Spanish to each other. She stopped on The Pink Panther, looking for teammate approval. "Well?"

"Nah, I've seen it ten times or more." Erik crossed his arms and Angel rolled her eyes, looking as if she wanted to spit at him. So far, Erik had vetoed everything the winged girl and Janos found to watch. Why he thinks a movie night is a good idea, I will never understand. Mystique shrugged at Emma's mental comment and sliding a nearby stack of magazines towards her, she stared flipping through them and copying the people and clothing styles inside. She had already lost interest in the television.

"Fine, I give up! You pick something." Angel complained after yet another veto. She tossed the remote at Erik as Janos left the couch and walked towards the kitchen with his empty popcorn bowl. He stuck his tongue out at Mystique as he walked past her and Mystique - now appearing as a redheaded young man with a lighting bolt painted across his eye - playfully gave Janos the finger in return.

Emma looked back at the silver screen of the television. Erik had stopped on some war movie; a chaotic scene of several sailors fighting in a dance hall over some silly girl appeared on the screen. What brutes, Emma thought projected to Mystique who had shifted back to her natural blue and looked towards at the TV frowning. Men, Mystique snorted to Emma, always fighting over some pretty girl like cavemen. She rolled her eyes. Erik always finds the freakiest shows.

Red and black smoke suddenly swirled next to Mystique and the blue girl jumped back in her chair. She still wasn't quite used to Azazel's fondness of appearing randomly and without warning. The red mutant looked down at Mystique and smiled quickly, showing too many teeth and in Emma's opinion, doing a piss-poor job of pretending it was always a coincidence that he just happened to appear very near Mystique when he teleported. Azazel was utterly head-over-heels for the blue girl - it didn't take a telepath to figure that out - and despite Mystique's cool indifference, Emma could see the images of little hearts that fluttered around her thoughts when Azazel was in the room. Emma looked at the red mutant and put her hand to her mouth, stifling a laugh. He's still wearing that silly policeman's hat he picked up yesterday after our mission. Mystique looked at Azazel and then back and Emma, giggling. Azazel smile fell at the women's obvious secret conversation about him.

"Why are you still wearing that stupid thing?" Angel snickered from the couch, unknowingly echoing Emma's observation. Azazel shot the winged girl a scowl as he puffed out his chest in a gesture of bravado.

"I look dashing." He adjusted the hat, as if to drive home his point. Angel rolled her eyes at him and unfurled her wings. One of them hit Erik in the face, possibly not on accident. She ignored Erik brushing her wing away and continued.

"No Rojo, you look like some idiot lawman. Take it off."

While Azazel was focused on his exchange with Angel, Mystique smiled wickedly and behind his back, grabbed his tail and gave it a playfully hard yank. She dropped the spade as Azazel whipped around, looking for the culprit just as Janos walked through the kitchen doorway holding a large bowl of fresh popcorn. Azazel narrowed his eyes at the Janos for a split second before jumping him, knocking the Latin youth to the floor. Popcorn flew in the air like confetti at a ticker-tape parade.

"But I didn't…!" All three women laughed as Azazel wrestled a very confused Janos to the ground. Azazel hated anyone touching his tail, although Emma was quite sure he'd wouldn't have hated it so much if he knew it had really been Mystique. Back on the couch, Erik ignored the spectacle and continued to change channels. This is better show than anything on that damn television, thought Emma, as she watched the two men comically roll around, Janos now trying to snatch the policeman's hat from the red mutant.

"Why is it so difficult to find one decent movie on TV?" Erik sighed as images of Mickey Mouse and Clarabelle Cow flashed across the screen. Emma turned away from the television. On the table in front of her was a heavily beaten-up copy of the Communist Manifesto, along with a large stack of other books in both Russian and English. Emma rolled her eyes at the mess.

If you keep leaving books scattered across the house, Emma thought projected at Azazel, I swear to God I'm going to sell them and keep the money. The red mutant stopped play fighting with Janos and sat-up, looking at the white mutant with a lopsided smile. Both of men were covered in crushed popcorn, and Janos had managed to snag the police hat away from Azazel and sported it like a king with a new crown.

"Nice work you clowns," Angel wrinkled her nose at the crushed popcorn strewn about the carpet. "We're going to get hordes of mice in here if you don't clean that up."

"From Ibezia to Norfolk stations, there is utterly nothing on TV." Erik dropped the remote on the coffee table in frustration. "I give up!"

"You could try the BBC" Mystique giggled and raised her eyebrow slyly at Erik. He scowled at her thinly veiled reference to him calling Charles; Charles was an out-of-bounds topic for Erik.

"Give it here; I'll find something!" Janos reached for the remote but he was beaten by Azazel who snatched it from Janos's hands with his tail. Before Azazel could gloat, Angel flew off the couch and seized the remote from him, laughing. Erik threatened the trio that he wasn't getting a new remove if they broke it - again. Mystique rolled her eyes and returned to mimicking figures from her fashion magazines. As the team melted into yet another argument over the remote, throwing words and crushed popcorn at each other, Emma sighed pulled one of Mystique's magazine towards her. She knew Erik's movie night was a bad idea from the start. Emma had lived this argument with her teammates ten times or more; on the battlefield, they were flawless as a unit, but socially, they could never remotely agree on anything when it came to watching TV. Emma flipped open Time to a random article titled "Is There Life on Mars?" The white mutant smirked as a handful of popcorn hit her in the face.

If there is life on mars, it's probably more civil than it is in this room.


A/N: I grew-up listening to David Bowie; he was the first concert I attended and Labyrinth is still one of my all-time favorite movies. I was very saddened to hear of his death. "Life on Mars" is one of my favorite songs and this story popped in my head as I listened to it the other night. I hope you enjoyed it. Long live the Starman!

Life on Mars

by David Bowie

It's a God-awful small affair
To the girl with the mousy hair
But her mummy is yelling no
And her daddy has told her to go

But her friend is nowhere to be seen
Now she walks through her sunken dream
To the seat with the clearest view
And she's hooked to the silver screen

But the film is a saddening bore
For she's lived it ten times or more
She could spit in the eyes of fools
As they ask her to focus on

Sailors fighting in the dance hall
Oh man look at those cavemen go
It's the freakiest show
Take a look at the lawman
Beating up the wrong guy
Oh man wonder if he'll ever know
He's in the best selling show
Is there life on Mars?

It's on America's tortured brow
That Mickey Mouse has grown up a cow
Now the workers have struck for fame
'Cause Lennon's on sale again
See the mice in their million hordes
From Ibiza to the Norfolk Broads
Rule Britannia is out of bounds
To my mother, my dog, and clowns
But the film is a saddening bore
'Cause I wrote it ten times or more
It's about to be writ again
As I ask you to focus on

Sailors fighting in the dance hall
Oh man look at those cavemen go
It's the freakiest show
Take a look at the lawman
Beating up the wrong guy
Oh man wonder if he'll ever know
He's in the best selling show
Is there life on Mars?