Title: From Sarah with Love
Author: TartanLioness
Summary: "The pain in Sarah's eyes almost brought tears to Grace's. The younger woman stood and with a clenched jaw and sorrowful brow she said goodbye and left the office."
Pairing: Grace/Boyd
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Peter Boyd woke up slowly for once, enjoying the exquisite feeling of a soft, warm woman in his arms. Her hair felt silky against his chest and he could smell her perfume. He had almost forgotten how wonderful it felt to wake up with someone and not jump out of a cold, lonely bed like he too often did.
Boyd tightened his grip on the woman and she snuggled closer, laying a gentle hand on his chest, playing with the smattering of hair surrounding his nipples.
Grace.
Her hand stilled, fingers splayed across his stomach. A few moments passed, then she slipped out of bed. Boyd instantly missed her heat and her scent and her skin against his. He could hear her walk around in his bedroom, probably looking for her clothes, and he kept his eyes shut, imagining her naked body next to his and not wanting to see that naked body covered up.
The door opened and then closed again and when Boyd finally opened his eyes, the room was empty and a trace of her perfume hung in the air.
Moments later, he found Sarah in his kitchen making coffee and he stopped abruptly in the doorway, disoriented. Sarah. Of course. His 'girlfriend'. Who was visiting from New York. Yes. Of course. Sarah. Not Grace. Not Grace. Of course not Grace! His thoughts whirled, but he stepped up behind the dark-haired, strong-jawed woman and kissed her good morning, silently berating himself for letting his colleague crawl into his thoughts – again.
When Sarah didn't respond to his kiss, he pulled back, glancing at her worriedly.
"What's the matter?" he asked carefully. Sarah looked at the floor.
The matter?! Well, you being in love with someone else might be a bit of a problem, Sarah thought, not without a generous amount of bitterness. "I… I'm going back to New York, Peter. Tomorrow."
Boyd stared at her. "What?" he said in his typical deadpan, flat tone of voice.
"I'm sorry, Peter, but I have to." I'm sure as hell not going to stay here when you're infatuated with bloody Grace! She left the kitchen, presumably to pack her things, and left Boyd alone with his thoughts.
Later, Sarah stepped through the double doors tentatively, wondering for the hundredth time if she was doing the right thing and deciding – for the hundredth time – that she was. He stride became confident, just as much from her decision as from pure acting, and she calmly greeted the two junior officers.
"Boyd's in the lab," Spencer said helpfully.
Sarah smiled but said, "Actually I'm here to see Grace Foley."
Both officers looked surprised and Stella wordlessly pointed to the right office. Sarah nodded her thanks and knocked on Grace's door, entering before she got her reply. The older woman looked up expectantly, her expression turning to one of surprise when she saw who it was.
"Sarah!" Her smile seemed genuine but Sarah doubted that it was. "Boyd's in the lab. He should be back soon though."
"Thanks Grace," Sarah smiled thinly. "But actually I'm here to see you."
"Me?" She was surprised; Sarah couldn't blame her. Sarah would have been surprised too had the roles been reversed.
"Yeah." She sat down. "Are you in love with Peter Boyd?"
Grace stared at her, her jaw dropped and her blue eyes widened.
What?
"I'm going home tomorrow," Sarah continued and Grace wondered if she had imagined the previous question. But then the American continued, "And I'm not coming back."
"Have you and Boyd had an argument?" Grace asked kindly, wondering why Sarah had told her this and confused because Boyd had seemed in a relatively good mood this morning; he wouldn't if he'd had a row with his girlfriend – even in her thoughts Grace snarled at the word.
"No," Sarah sighed sadly. "He's been just as wonderful as he always is."
Yeah, fucking right.
"But he doesn't love me. He loves you." Sarah's voice was quiet and sad but composed and Grace couldn't help but admire her – she wondered how she, Grace, would have reacted if she believed her lover was in love with someone else. Then Sarah's words sunk in and she protested, wondering briefly how stupid Sarah was if she thought Peter Boyd was in love with her, Grace.
"He said your name, Grace," Sarah cut through her arguments. "This morning he pulled me to him in bed and whispered 'Grace'. I don't think he even realises that he spoke out loud, because I didn't say anything, but he loves you, Grace."
Some silly part of Grace couldn't help but leap with hopefully joy, but her sensibility overrode it quickly.
"That doesn't mean that the man is in love with me, for God's sake!"
"It's not just that. This just seems to confirm it without a shadow of a doubt. At least for me," She smiled sadly. "The way he talks about you, the way he looks at you, even the way he argues with you. You know, he never argues with me. He needs you, and he knows it. You're his counterbalance. And he knows it. And you know it too, don't you?"
They were both quiet for several moments. Yes, Grace thought; he needed her to draw a line somewhere. But that did not automatically mean that he was in love with her. But, her heart sang rebelliously, please let it be true.
"And you are in love with him." Sarah's words were a statement not a question and when Grace opened her mouth to protest, just like she did every time one of her children asked her that question, Sarah just smiled and said, "Don't even bother protesting, Dr Foley; I can see it in your eyes. You love him and he loves you. And you can have him. If he loved me, I'd fight for him, don't doubt that; I'd fight, claws and teeth. But he doesn't." Her voice was strong, but filled with sadness and Grace's admiration for the younger woman's strength of mind grew. She had no doubt that Sarah was in love with Boyd, yet here she was, calmly telling another woman, her rival, that the man they both loved was in love with her, and she, Sarah, was letting him go without a fight.
"But…"
"Grace. I've had my chance. You let him go without a fight because you didn't think he loved you. Now I'm giving you a chance. Thing is, he hoped he'd fall in love with me. He's already in love with you. I can't compete with that." The pain in Sarah's eyes almost brought tears to Grace's. The younger woman stood and with a clenched jaw and sorrowful brow she said goodbye and left the office.
Grace stared after her as she strode out the door, passing Boyd who was coming back from the lab without a word. Boyd too stared after her quickly retreating back with a blank expression on his face. When Sarah finally slipped out of his sight, he turned his gaze back towards the office and, noticing that her door was open, he went to Grace's office.
"Did Sarah come here to see you?" he asked uncomfortably, crossing his arms in front of his chest. Grace, still shocked, could only nod. Boyd frowned. "What did she want?"
She looked up, finally meeting his eyes with hers.
"She wanted to tell me that I can have you," Grace whispered hoarsely, her shock evident in her voice. "And to point out that she knows I'm in love with you."
Boyd stared at her. Now, the first part, about Grace being allowed to 'have him', he could understand. Sarah had seen right through him and had told him so this morning after she'd packed her things – in slightly more and louder words. This he could deal with. But he had no idea how to deal with Sarah's accusation or observation – he wasn't sure which – of Grace's feelings.
Choosing the easy way out – leaving the ball in her court – he leaned nonchalantly against the doorframe. "And, um, was she right?" he asked, fully expecting her to laugh in his face and tell him not to be daft.
She didn't say anything, though, just averted her eyes and played with her wedding ring. She mentally scolded herself for getting into this position. On the other hand, Sarah might be right, and honestly, Grace was tired of waiting, tired of wanting something she couldn't have. She wanted Boyd and if his lover – ex-lover, she corrected herself – thought she had a chance, she was bloody well not going to waste it. She looked up again, knowing that her lack of answer had already given away what she was going to say, and nodded.
Boyd closed his eyes tightly, and tried to suppress the immense joy that flooded through him at her answer. Rubbing his forehead, he prepared to tell her that Sarah hadn't been entirely off the mark with her assessment of him either, prepared to tell his best friend that he cared for her. Telling her that he loved her – even though he knew he did – wasn't really an option. It was much too complicated, much too early and much too scary.
Grace made a strangled noise, a mix between embarrassment and disappointment and quickly stood, striding past Boyd decisively, not about to let him reject her just yet. Her hopes had gone up with Sarah's words and now he was going to tear them down. I don't want to hear you say you don't want me.
She'd barely made it out of her office and into the corridor between it and his before she felt a strong hand gripping her arm, pulling her back roughly. She was about to yell at Boyd, but didn't get a chance. He had made her lose her balance and she was now flush up against his chest with his hand still gripping her arm tightly.
Boyd didn't even consider the junior officers still in the main office. He just didn't want Grace to walk away from him – again. And he certainly didn't want Grace to walk away from him with the notion that he wasn't as crazy about her as she was about him. So he had pulled her to him and now he didn't even bother looking for confirmation or approval in her eyes before he descended his lips to hers.
The kiss was briefer than either would have liked, but it was full of promise. Boyd caressed Grace's lips with his gently, not wanting to rush her, and she gradually got over her initial shock and responded eagerly.
When they parted, Boyd smiled down at her and stroked her hair. "I don't think Sarah was completely off the mark when it came to me, either," he said quietly, with a smile in his voice. Grace chuckled and buried her face in his shoulder, sneaking her arms around his waist.
THE END