A/N: A fic about Leia and her weird Force-using brother. Oh, and also their dad.
Leia's relationship to the Force could be described in three words: soothing, present, and complicated.
Soothing, because when her friends and family were close, the comfort of the Force was there to remind her that these relationships were truly important. So often (perhaps too often, a flaw she was more than aware of), she put duty before her relationships. Her relationship with Han, with her brother, and, then, when her son was gone, before anyone.
The Force was always present. Even when she renounced it, explaining to Luke all those years ago that she felt her place was elsewhere—distinctive not harnessing her ability to use the Force to become a Jedi—that she knew her path was different than her twin's. The Force was there, when her Force connection broke from her son, when the first home she really had was blown to bits, when she needed to find comfort in her own parentage and bloodline, when Han's light burned out.
Ultimately, her relationship with the Force was so complicated. Even when she didn't want it, when she tried to pour herself into what she was really good at—leading people—it would always creep back in to remind her of her ghosts: a brother disappeared, a husband separated, and son lost to the very evil she was fighting to destroy. Really, the Force manifested itself more in Leia when painful memories rose to the surface.
It was especially complicated when true ghosts—the dead kind—kept trying to make an appearance in her life. In the beginning, when Leia had just married Han and they were assisting the rebuilding of the Republic while also preparing for the birth of their child, she constantly felt a tug on what she had then, only recently, identified (with Luke's help) as the Force. The tug was almost physical, like a hand tirelessly pulling at her shoulder, wanting to be noticed; it happened in the private moments, when was alone in her bedroom, in a closet, always when Han was gone.
The thing is, Leia shrugged it off constantly, every time it happened, and pretended like she didn't know what the literal force was pulling at her. "Stop it!" she would say over her shoulder.
It would stop, for the time being, until the next time she was alone.
After this particular moment, she forcefully pressed the door button and it opened with a hiss, most similar to her feelings. She stormed down the narrow hall to Luke's quarters, only a short way on this freighter. His door crashed open. She hoped to scare him and throw him off guard—that was just the type of mood she was in—but then when she arrived, he was calmly lying on his couch with a datapad, which he looked up from with his blue eyes.
She sighed. "I kind of wanted to scare you."
"I sensed you coming," he said calmly, and then gave a small laugh: "You're mad."
She pouted, and he moved his feet as an invitation to sit down on the couch next to her. "I think I hate this Force thing."
"It's…" he started, then sat up straight, putting a hand on his sister's shoulder (right where the Force tug has been), "It's father, isn't it?" He hastily grabbed a blanket from behind them, spreading it across her shoulders. She curled up upon its touch.
She nodded, looking down and spreading her hands in her lap, around her belly. "I know it's him."
"I talk to him all the time, you know," is what he said after a while.
Of course he does, she thought, rolling her eyes. He laughed, and she their eyes met for a second as Leia remembered their twin connection. "He knows you need time."
"You talk about me?"
Laughing, "Well, yeah, Leia. What do you think he asks about?" He noticed her purse her lips and he sighed. "He wants to apologize to you directly…"
"Oh, well isn't that just so nice? He has so much to be sorry for—he… he… Isn't it so convenient that he is allowed the opportunity to haunt me for the rest of my life?" She was standing up now, above Luke, blanket dropped to the floor, her voice raising and her arms so close to flailing. "I didn't ask for any of this, Luke!"
She was breathing heavily and silence fell between them. Luke stood up and stared her sister in the eye, putting both around around her shoulders. Her brother was comforting, and Leia began to calm down. "Just give him a chance, Leia."
She nodded, looking down away from his piercing blue eyes. "Could we…" she started, "Could we talk to him together?"
He let out a soft laugh, nodded, and they both sat down on the couch. Luke said, "I guess we just wait—oh."
In the corner of Luke's tiny quarters, a shadowy blue man—scruffy, young, in Jedi robes—stood almost nervously in the corner. The ghostly glow around him followed his body as he pulsed nervously, waiting for someone to say something.
Finally, Luke said, "Hello, Father," with a sheepish smile. Luke reached for Leia's hand as he realized her mouth was agape, eyes fixated on Anakin Skywalker's ghostly appearance.
"Hi, Luke!" Anakin said a little too excitedly. Familiar. He straightened up and took a few steps toward his children. "And… hi, Leia." If he wasn't a blue ghost, one could probably see him blushing nervously.
Leia's gaze met the floor. After a few moments of awkward silence, feeling Luke's breath and his eventual sighs, knowing that father and son were making eye contact, she looked the ghost of her father in the eye and said, "What gives you the right to bother me every single time I'm alone? I am positive there are less intrusive ways of reaching me than by physically pulling on my shoulders." Her lip was quivering, the anger boiling. She felt a bead of sweat form on her temple.
As if ghosts had weight, Anakin sat on the coffee table, their knees—two human pairs and one ghoulish pair—were inches away from each other. "I am sorry about that," he said calmly, more calmly than Leia had expected. "And so much more, Leia."
She crossed her arms and felt six years old. In that instance, she was jealous of Luke's forgiving nature: how could she possibly forgive someone who had committed so many personal atrocities against her, against everything she stood for? Someone who had watched her torture, someone who stood by and murdered her entire livelihood? How did Luke forgive someone who had hunted him like an animal, tortured him like prey?
Somehow, Luke did it.
"Your brother was right about me. So very right, and it took me so long to believe him."
She forgot about the Force, the telepathy, the familial bond. Because the figure in front of her was her father, Darth Vader. No. Anakin Skywalker. When she felt it, that bond, she felt the warmth, the feeling she gets when Luke hugs her close, when Han gives her that side smile, the feeling of good things. That was it, really: the ghost of her father emanated a feeling of only pure warmth, of good. Of light.
"Leia, my darling," he placed his blue hand on her knee. She mentally remarked how much softer his voice was; she wasn't expected that. It separated itself in stark contrast to the breathing machine that held him together during their plight. "I am so sorry for my past. I cannot change it, or the pain it caused you. Your brother. Everyone in the galaxy." Leia and Anakin's eyes locked in what felt like an unbreakable gaze. "Stars, you look so much like your mother."
Leia blushed, broke their gaze, and placed her hands in her lap. "I do?" she said, quizzically. "Wait, don't answer that. I'm still mad."
Both Anakin and Luke shared and laugh and Leia cracked a sly smile.
"You know, I was convinced that your mother was having a girl," he said. "She thought otherwise. Turns out, we were both right."
She laughed, not wanting to admit that she was touched by this story. The Force around their union was so bright, so familiar, and, admittedly, so comforting. Her brain wanted to run away from this conversation, but her present body which felt the Force flowing through it never wanted to leave.
"Can she visit us to?"
Anakin shook his head, letting a frown cross his face. "The Force is giving and navigable, but ultimately, no, your mother cannot explore both its celestial world and its mortal world."
Leia nodded. She saw Luke's jaw tighten.
"You know, Leia, I've been trying to talk to you for a while to tell you two things: the first being my apology, which I expect to exceed your lifetime. You're stubborn just like me." They laughed. "The second, is, of course, congratulations."
"Oh! Oh. Thank you." She blushed. It was odd, her father being there. Present in her life. Congratulating her on her marriage and relationships and impending motherhood.
"No doubt he will be strong in the Force. And yes, he… I am never wrong about this." He winked.
She laughed. "Actually, Luke beat you to that one the other day—he actually told it the baby was a boy, much to my chagrin…"
"Leia, you're going to be a wonderful mother. You're a tireless leader and you'll be a marvelous mother," Anakin said. "Oh, please tell Han I'm sorry about Bespin…"
Luke and Leia shared a knowing chuckle and looked at each other, "Oh, I don't think that will ever come easy. Sorry, father, but if you think Leia is stubborn—she has found a partner that could be even more so…"
She blushed at the talk of her misunderstood partner. But she had to agree. Han would never be able to forgive their father—the man whose alter ego they were constantly escaping, fleeing, fighting for their life against—like his own children would. Leia would be lying to herself if the Force didn't guide her forgiveness—which still wasn't complete, and wouldn't be for the foreseeable future—in this moment. It soothed her. The presence of her father and her brother, together, calmed her anger and her fiery temper.
They talked for the next couple of hours, swapping stories from the Clone Wars, about their mother, about their hidden romance, about her career in politics, about Luke's life on Tatooine—Anakin and Luke spoke to each other for a brief moment in Huttese—, about Leia's upbringing as a princess. About their life fighting for justice.
Then, finally, Anakin said to Leia, "Would it be okay if I kept visiting you?"
She took a second, swallowed, and then nodded.
He bid his children goodbye, and then disappeared.
Twins instantly locked eyes: Leia's mouth agape, in disbelief of the power of the Force, Luke's mouth tight, curling up to a smile, knowing.