Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha. I do not own Inuyasha and Miroku. I do not own squit.

Thank you, Takahashi-sensei!

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Dark of the Moon

An Inuyasha FanFic

By Janice Rips

"What are you staring at, monk?"

His surly growl startles me from my reverie. "Your pardon, Inuyasha. I did not mean to stare. I was merely lost in thought."

"Keh. Probably thinkin' something perverted."

"Not at all. You wound me."

"Whatever. You're supposed to be on watch. Go watch something else."

I lie. I was staring at him.

More specifically, I was staring at his hair. Hair like a long curtain of silk. And black. So black, it seems to draw in all the light around it, draw it in and swallow it. Swallow it, like this void within my hand swallows all in its path.

And I wonder.

I wonder what it would be like to run my fingers through those silken strands, to dig my hands into its denseness. To bury my nose in it and inhale his sweet, human scent as I hold his trembling body to my own and I...

No.

Not happening.

I turn my gaze to the circle of firelight. There, sweet Sango sleeps, huddled together with Shippo and Kirara. She will take the next watch, but for now, she sleeps the sleep of the innocent. Kagome has gone back to her own time. It's just as well. When he's like this, no one can touch him, not even her. And Inuyasha...

Inuyasha sits alone.

"Come, Inuyasha, you should eat. You didn't touch your supper."

"No thanks. I'm not hungry." Just then, a low, gurgling growl cuts the air between us.

I have to chuckle. "Liar."

"Shut up." He turns his back to me.

I get up, walk over to him, hold out my good hand.

"Go away." He doesn't turn.

"Come, Inuyasha, there's plenty of stew left, and you're obviously hungry. Come eat."

"Pack members who don't pull their own weight don't get to eat."

"Really. Then what about Shippo?"

"That's different. He's just a kit. Pups and bitches are to be protected. Besides, right now, even his little foxy tricks are more useful than I am."

I sit down beside him, reach for his shoulder.

"Don't."

Hesitantly, I pull my hand away. Fine. "I don't know why you would think you don't pull your own weight, Inuyasha. You do more than your share. You're our leader."

He won't look at me. "I'm not fit to lead anything," he mutters petulantly. "I'm useless, worthless, weak..."

"Human?" I interrupt.

"...Yeah."

"I see." Silently, I sit back on my heels. "So that's what you think of us."

Were it any other night, his ear would twitch at me. Then again, were it any other night, we would not be having this conversation.

"It's not the same."

"I disagree."

"It isn't!" he protests.

"How so?"

"You, Sango, Kagome... even that old hag, Kaede. You're always human. All the time. You know your strengths. You've learned how to hold your own. But look at me--no claws, no teeth, I can barely hold my own sword! Three nights a month isn't long enough to learn to fight as a human. I'm as weak as a puppy. Father should have drowned me when I was born--that's what you do to the runt of the litter. Kagome should have left me pinned to that tree."

A soft sob punctuates his last word. Wait a minute. Is he...?

"Inuyasha. Are you... crying?"

"Hell no." I can see his shoulders shake.

"You are. But... why?"

"I'm scared," he mumbles.

Did I hear him correctly? "Pardon me?"

"I said I'm scared! Are ya satisfied now, monk?" He leaps to his feet, faces me at last. Tears well in his human eyes, steam down his human cheeks. "You're my pack! Mine! But when I'm like this, I can't even defend myself! Any one of those bastards could take you from me."

"Who do you mean?"

"Naraku, his Lordship my brother, that mangy wolf... any of them! And there's not a damn thing I can do about it!"

Suddenly, his words penetrate my thick skull. I stand to face him. "Even me?"

"Miroku?"

"Would it bother you if they took away... me?" I reach out, caress his cheek, my thumb smoothing away the last of his tears. "Am I yours?"

He stares at me, wide-eyed. Slowly, he nods. I pull him into my arms. I bury my nose in his hair, run my fingers through the silky black strands, hold his trembling body to my own. But that is all. It is everything and nothing as I imagined. I hold him, soothe him, pet him like the wild creature he is. Then I take his human hand in my own, and lead him back to the warmth of the firelight.

I am his. For now, that is enough.