Valkyrie yawned as she sat up in bed, wondering what had woken her up. She was on vacation, all the way in Hawaii, and it was pitch black outside her window. Sure, she missed Skulduggery and her work, but she did need a holiday once in a while, away from all the action and adventure of being a detective. It took her a moment to realise her phone was ringing, and she picked it up hastily, wondering who would want her at this time of night.
"Hello?"
"It's Vex." Someone responded on the other end of the line. They were obviously deliberately changing their voice, and she couldn't make out who it was.
"Who is this?"
"It's Vex!" Dexter Vex screamed on the other end of the line, followed by hysterical laughter from himself and other Irishmen in the background.
"Wow, Vex, you're so funny. Now shut up and go away; I'm trying to sleep." She grumbled. Valkyrie was obviously on loudspeaker, as there was more laughing following her words.
"Erskine!" Vex called. "I told you to check the time zones! She's sleeping!"
"Yeah, but Val could sleep all day." Erskine protested from somewhere else.
"You didn't really check them, did you?" Ghastly asked. There was a long silence.
"Hang on… are you guys using the phones around Skulduggery's house?" Valkyrie caught on immediately. There was yelling in the background, and a door slammed somewhere.
"He found me!" This was Saracen Rue.
"Shhhh… come into the kitchen, that's where I am." Anton Shudder said in his quiet voice.
"Guys, what's going on? Why is there yelling and doors slamming and is that Skulduggery?" there was a scream, a crash, and the fading sounds of running footsteps. Erskine muttered something unintelligible, but she definitely caught her partner's name in there.
"Ah! Val. Hello. Help me." Her partner yelled into the phone.
"What's going on?"
"These… these… morons have broken into my house and started messing with my telephones! What do I do?"
"Well, I mean, you guys are Dead Men. There isn't a lot anyone can do."
"Come back and help me!"
"It's one in the morning over here! Do you expect me to just teleport?!" she hissed. There was another silence apart from the stifled giggles of the other Dead Men.
"Yeah, Val, teleport." This was Tanith, and Skulduggery groaned.
"Not you too… I'm sending Fletcher over." Skulduggery cut his line short, and there was raucous laughter from Erskine and Saracen, who were now sharing a phone.
"OK, so where are you guys?" Valkyrie asked. The Dead Men started babbling away, all at once.
"One at a time!" she complained.
"OK. Me and Tanith are in Skul's bedroom…" Ghastly started.
"Me and Saracen are in the living room behind the big sofa…" Erskine whispered.
"I'm in the kitchen." Anton stated.
"I'm in the bath!" Vex finished cheerily.
"Aw, Vex, c'mon. Don't give me that image of your sexy um, body." Valkyrie protested. There was a rush and pop of air behind her, and she turned to see Fletcher Renn looking bewildered, his hair a mess and a bruise starting to appear on his left cheek.
"Um, Skulduggery-" he started.
"Yeah. I know." She said through a sigh.