(Author's Note: This is the story of the same summer day through four different viewpoints. Enjoy)
Ness's Story
A beautiful sunrise arose over the crater-filled hills of Onett, beaming its cheerful rays onto to green ground below. It woke up the birds and made them begin to sing their jovial songs. Although the beauty of this was completely wasted on Ness because he was still asleep. It was the first day of summer for him and he planned on kicking it off by not getting up until at least noon. He wanted this summer to start out perfectly.
Ness was in the middle of having a great dream involving ninjas and monkeys, when he was jolted awake by a blinding beam of light. He shot up in bed to see his mother walking around his room opening up his window shades filling the room with cheery sunlight. Ness rolled over in his bed and looked at his clock. He decided that the sun was far too cheerful for ten o'clock in the morning and fell back to sleep with an unsatisfied grunt.
His mother woke him up again within minutes speaking in a gentle tone," Ness dear, I really need you to get up honey. The Henderson's are coming over today and I want you to clean your room before they show up."
"But mom! It's the first day of-"
"But nothing young man! You get your butt out of bed or I'll send Tracy in here to wake you up, and you don't want that again do you?" She added in the same gentle tone.
Ness thought back on the last time Tracy had woken him up for Mom and remembered it ending with him on the top branch of a tree wearing nothing but his boxers. Needless to say, he decided against sleeping in. He made a visibly exaggerated effort to get out of his bed and stumble to his dresser. After changing into his usual purple and yellow shirt he stumbled down to the family room and turned on the T.V. to ENN.
The oddly robotic newscaster was finishing his story,"...and the elephant cried until sundown. In other news, earlier this morning the production of the upcoming film, The Town, was halted due to a boy destroying the set. Oddly, Galaxy Studios has decided not to press charges. More at eleven."
Ness shrugged and turned off the T.V. He hated slow news days, but the mentioning of movies gave Ness an idea on what to do to make his day a little better. He decided to go to the movies with Paula. He picked up his phone and dialed the number.
Paula answered sounding very frustrated, "Yeah?"
"Er, hi Paula. Are you okay? You sound kinda ticked."
"Oh I'm fine thanks. It's just that today is the last day of preschool here and the kids are getting a little hyper-PUT THE KNIFE DOWN BILLY!"
"A-are you sure you don't need any help?"
"No, it's all right. What did you call for?"
"I just wanted to see if you wanted to go see the movie, The Day After Yesterday with me. It would give you a good excuse to get outta there."
"I'm sorry Ness but I just couldn't leave my parents alone with these kids so crazy like thi-OH MY GOD JIMMY NO!" And with that the two were disconnected. This left Ness a little concerned about Paula's safety, but he decided that she was probably fine and that he should go to the movies alone.
Ness walked down the busy streets of Onett on his way to the newly constructed Peaceful Theater. As he approached it, he noticed a large crowd surrounding the building. He knew the movie was popular, but he didn't think it was this popular. It wasn't until he got closer that he realized that there were flames and smoke rising from the theater's roof. Some police officers were already there putting up road blocks and clearing a path for the fire trucks.
Ness walked up to the nearest person he could find, "Hey! What the heck happened here?"
Unfortunately for Ness, the nearest person was Lardna Minch, "Don't address me like that you filthy little urchin-oh! It's you Ness. Some filthy little urchin crashed something into the theater. Well anyways, nobody's been seriously injured. And by-the-by could you get your father to pay off the debt you have to my family sometime soon. We're just festering in poverty you know. Tch! I'm getting soot on my mink coat. I'm getting out of this urchin-hole!" She gave a final scoff and walked off in a dignified matter.
Ness looked around him to see if there was anybody he could help. It looked like the firefighters had the blaze under control and all of the people out of the building. He ran over to the injured and quickly healed them before the press could start in on him, but it was too late. The reporters and camera men were on him faster than the raptors in Jurassic Park. He quickly bolted away from them down a nearby ally at speeds only true fear can bring out in a person. He was making a good space between him and the other reporters until one jumped off of a fire-escape and landed in front of him.
He found himself surrounded. He quickly dove through a door in a nearby building. He heard the door hit someone on his way in and yelled a quick, "Sorry!" back at the person. He glanced behind him to see that the reporters had had their attention diverted to something else in the room. He didn't press his luck to go and find out what it was; instead he ran out of the building, across the street, and to the burger place. He sat down at a table and gave a big sigh. Frank walked over to him and sat down, "What's wrong Ness? Bad day?"
"Yeah, I've been trying to get this summer to start out right, but things just keep going wrong."
"Well that's the way life works I'm afraid. Just drink some of this 'mineral water' and you'll feel much better."
"Why did you say 'mineral water' so funny and overly-inconspicuously like that? There's not something in it is there?"
"Oh? Heh, of course not...heh where would you get that idea my frien-HOLY MONKIES WHAT IS THAT!"
Ness turned around and then turned back again to see that Frank had left both the table and the building. He gave another sigh and ordered a burger and fries.
Ness walked out of the restaurant feeling a little better and felt like a swim. He had an uneventful walk down the street to the pool. He changed into his swimsuit in his backpack and dove into the water. He swam to the opposite end of the pool and lounged in the water for a few minutes. Suddenly a basketball, from a nearby game being played in a nearby court, fell into the water next to Ness. He picked it up, backed up a little in the water and threw it back to the players. However when he backed up he nudged a 14 year old boy who had a mullet.
When Ness turned around to apologize; the boy flung himself at Ness at started spitting streams of water at him. Between breaths he screamed, "WANNA FIGHT BUB? HUH? WANNA FIGHT BUB?"
Ness was confused and slightly frightened by this so he just got out of the pool as quickly as possible and started to dry himself off with a towel. Fortunately the angry kid had the attention-span of a rodent and started picking a fight with someone else. Ness was drying his hair when he noticed that the rather attractive female life-guard was looking at him. He saw his chance and ran to the thirty-foot high diving board, shoving all the other people in line out of the way. He made a quick pose and prepared to do an impressive dive in an attempt to impress the girl.
unfortunately he didn't even get to the end of the board when he heard a yell behind him. He turned to see the mullet kid running at him wearing a towel as if it were a cape screaming,"I AM DARKWING DUCK! TERROR OF THE NIGHT!"
He shoved Ness off of the board and dove off in a Superman-esque pose. Although Ness didn't see this because he had lost his balance, fallen off of the thirty-foot high board, and was now unconscious in the water.
Ness woke up with to a wonderful view of the hospital ceiling rushing past him as some doctors rolled him into a room. He couldn't be sure, but Ness was almost positive that one of the doctors bore a striking resemblance to Jeff. He didn't have much time to contemplate this however, as he passed out again. He woke up again much later to find himself in a hospital room. He sat up in bed but almost immediately went back down due to the feeling that his head had been trampled by a stampede of crazed elephants. It took him a few moments to remember what had happened. He remembered falling dangerously close to the side of the pool and then the next thing he knew, he was laying in the hospital.
Well it didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what had happened, so he quickly used Life up on himself, found his normal street clothes, and wandered down to the front desk. The sickeningly cheery nurse told him the bill and Ness reluctantly paid, he'd done most of the healing himself after all. He stomped out of the hospital and went home. From the look of the sky, it was about eight o'clock. He wanted nothing more than sleep at this point after such a crappy day. He opened the door to his house and walked up to his room.
"Going to bed already Ness? "Said his mother as he walked into the house, "Well I guess you should, a doctor just called and told me what happened. Are you okay?"
"Yeah I guess, it's just been such a bad day...although I'm sure I'll look back on all of this and laugh."
"Well, you know what they say, 'Tomorrow is another day.'"
Ness shut the door to his room and lay down on his bed. He thought about what his mother had said that thought, "It had better be!" before drifting off into sleep.
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Paula's Story
The morning sun that was shining over Onett was not seen by the residents of Twoson as it was storming outside. Paula looked out of her bedroom window as she awoke at eight o'clock and jumped when she saw the rain. Today was going to be the last day of preschool for the kids that went to Polestar and they were going to be hyper. Of all of the possible days for it to rain, this was the worst. The kids were usually hyper on rainy days but with the last day and a rainy day combined, it would be like trying to look after Steve Irwin on drugs in the middle of a zoo.
Her feelings of dread grew even more when she was downstairs setting up for the last day of school party. She looked at the food items that they would be giving the kids: cupcakes, cake, Mountain Dew, and pixie sticks. This was the last time she let the kids write down their own ideas for the food at the party. She could see that her mom and dad were nervous about today also. Her dad had begun developing a nervous twitch ever since he woke up, and her mom was making an unusual amount of Hand-aids. The doorbell rang at about nine o'clock and the three family members nearly jumped to the ceiling in nervous surprise.
The first to arrive was Billy Henderson. His parents nearly threw him into the school before driving off in the direction of Onett. He was running around in circles screaming and waving around a plastic sword. Paula shuddered to think of how this would be once they served the food. The doorbell rang again and Jimmy Jimerson burst through the door screaming something about monkeys. Soon three more kids: Samantha, Dan, and Ashley, showed up.
Once all five of the preschool students were there, Mr. Polestar began to reluctantly serve the snacks. Within thirty minutes, the entire house was in chaos.
Mrs. Polestar was desperately trying to calm the hyped up children, "Wait Billy, that's not a toy! No Samantha! Jimmy's those are not edible! Wait!" This type of shouting went on for another few minutes until she gave up and took a seat on the couch next to the already tired Paula and Mr. Polestar. Almost as soon as she sat down the phone rang.
Paula stood up and wearily went to pick it up. It was Ness; this made her feel a little better, until Billy ran into the room chasing Jimmy around with a knife.
"PUT THE KNIFE DOWN BILLY!" At this random shouting Ness seemed a little taken aback, but he continued talking. He was saying something about helping and something about a movie, but she wasn't paying to much attention. She answered as best as she could, but was more distracted by the reaction Jimmy had taken to seeing the knife.
Jimmy had jumped up onto the kitchen table and stood right underneath the low hanging chandelier. He was shrieking like a monkey at Billy and dancing around in a manner that would have made a lesser person cry upon seeing it. He then proceeded to jump up onto the chandelier and swing on it wildly. Paula's parents reacted at this and dove toward the table, but it was too late. Paula managed a scream mid-sentence before the lighting fixture fell onto the table and sent food items everywhere. A stray Mountain Dew can knocked the phone off of the hook.
Paula rushed over to where the accident had happened to see if Jimmy was okay. There was no movement for a few moments and everybody was getting worried when Jimmy suddenly sprang out of the debris howling. He grabbed a banana that had fallen on the floor and ran for the front door.
"Grab him!" Yelled Mr. Polestar as the kid ran under his legs. Jimmy ran out of the door just as Mrs. Polestar slammed it shut.
She sighed, "Well Jimmy always did have an overactive imagination. We'd better get him soon before he hurts himself. Paula, can you go and find him?"
"Er, okay Mom, but will you guys be okay watching the other kids?"
"Yeah, they're having a sugar crash finally; they won't be up for hours. Jimmy should too; it's just a matter of finding him..."
Paula nodded in agreement and ran out of the door with an umbrella. She looked on the wetted grass and could make out the tiny footprints of a four year old. She followed them throughout Twoson and all the way to Berglin Park. Of all the places for a little kid to end up in, Burglin Park had to be the worst. After a nervous gulp she entered the deceptively cheery park. Even for a rainy day the park was bustling with people.
She walked up to a guy in a hockey mask and tapped him on the shoulder, "Um, excuse me sir, have you seen a little boy about four years old and acting like a monkey?"
The man answered in an unsettlingly uneven tone, "Yeah I seen a kid like that. Yeah he was acting all crazy-like yeah! I tried to sell him a sign yeah, and he just threw a banana at me YEAH and then he ran off YEAH!"
Paula, wanting nothing more than to get away from this lunatic, asked him another question quickly before he could continue, "Where did he run off to? Did you see?"
"Off toward Everdred's old house, yeah! Hey, would you like to buy a sign?"
"Oh, heh, no thank you." With that she quickly ran off toward the old house. Ever since Everdred had disappeared, the house had become an even worse wreck than it was when he was still living there. The paint was peeling and there was always a sign hanging on the door that said, "KEEP OUT!" Paula, of course, ignored the sign and went in anyways. She had walked in on a poker game between a hippie, one of Twoson's Mr. T look-alikes, and guy in a funny hat.
The Mr. T guy was throwing things out onto the table, "...three pencils and a Rolllex foo's!"
The man in the funny hat reached down under the table to produce a sleeping Jimmy, "I see you Rolllex and pencils and raise you this kid I found!"
The hippie spoke next, "Dude, you like, can't bet a kid dude. That's like, making him not free dude. You're like The Man dude."
"Hey, I've already bet and lost everything else today! Besides, this kids in good condition..."
"I piddy da foo dat bets small childrens!"
"Yeah dude, like, why do we even play with you dude?"
At this point the funny hat man raised his arms into the air in an attempt to look non-threatening. This was a mistake, however, because this action caused the extra cards he'd had up his sleeves to shoot out and fall to the floor.
"I piddy da foo who cheats Mista T!" The Mr. T look-alike dove across the table and tackled the funny hat guy. Paula took this opportunity to run into the room and grab Jimmy. She also got in a few hits on funny hat man with her frying pan. She ran out of the old house and all the way back home. To her relief, Jimmy remained asleep the entire time. She walked in to find that everyone in the house was napping in the family room. She put Jimmy down on the floor, sat down, and quickly joined them.
She woke up a few hours later to see the last of the childrens' parents leaving with their kid. Paula yawned and walked over to where her parents were standing, "Thanks for letting me sleep guys. Anything happen while I was sleeping?"
Paula's father chuckled and turned on the T.V., "Quite a lot actually, look."
Paula turned her attention to the news on the T.V. to see a picture of three mobsters and the man with the funny hat being escorted into a police car in front of the Twoson dept. store. The newscaster continued his story as the footage of the arrest continued, "No one here knows who the vigilante is that stopped the robbery from inside the store, but one thing is for sure, wherever you are, we salute you...And now sports!"
At this the T.V. was turned off and Paula sighed, a little disappointed that she had missed all of that. Well besides that, it was an uneventful night for Paula but she was excited that tomorrow was going to be her first real day of summer. She decided, as she drifted off to sleep later that night that she would kick it off by not waking up until at least noon.
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Jeff's Story
The morning sun was just as spectacular over the snowy fields of Winters that day as it was in Onett. Although the brightest of suns wouldn't have been able to bring the temperature above twenty degrees. It was about nine o'clock at Snow Wood boarding school when Jeff Andonuts woke up excitedly. He jumped out of his bed and threw on his hiking gear. It was the first day of Snow Wood's summer break in which the students returned to their families. Jeff wasn't excited because he was leaving school for three months or because he was going to see his father again, no, he was excited because today he would make his first trip into Onett to begin his long-awaited summer project.
Although first, he had to trek all of the way down to his father's laboratory and get the Sky Runner VI, there had been some other unsuccessful versions recently. He grabbed a couple of new guns, just in case, and quickly went to the front gate. Students were bustling everywhere waiting for it to open and release the students to sweet sweet freedom. Although you wouldn't know that the students were eager for the end of school by listening to their conversations.
Indeed, they sounded more like they were still in class, "Well," said one boy to another, "my recent ape-man experiment concluded that apes can indeed use fine china when eating a turnip!"
"Ah, but you see," responded the other boy, "Jeff Golblum's theory of monkey-china relations clearly states that said ape would not enjoy said turnip! Ha ha!"
This line of conversation went on back and forth and in an almost continuous circle while Jeff waited for the gate to open. Eventually a loud creaking noise could be heard all through the school. Time slowed to a sickeningly crawling pace for Jeff as each moment of the gates opening went by like an eternity. After a few more grueling seconds, the gate was open and Jeff ran out of the school yard and into the woods onto the way to the lab. In fact, he was the only one out, as the rest of the school had been caught up in a debate over weather or not Jeff Goldblum was in fact, a turnip.
Getting through the woods was easy for Jeff now. He'd done it so many times he could almost do it without thinking about where he was going. He soon came out onto Lake Tess and onto the familiar view of the many pitched tents of the Tessie watchers. Oddly enough, every time Jeff had the Bubble Monkey summon Tessie, the Tessie watchers were always distracted by something. On his way to the small jut of land where Bubble Monkey stood, Jeff passed a man wearing a tinfoil hat and muttering something about "them."
"Poor Sebastian," thought Jeff, "he just hasn't been the same since that Starmen Abduction..." As he was thinking about the poor Tessie Watcher, Bubble Monkey had floated up above the water. Jeff looked down to see the familiar shaped shadow rising from underneath the murky water. For a moment Jeff thought that the Watchers might actually see Tessie this time.
As if in answer to his thoughts, Sebastian stood up suddenly and ran into the woods screaming something about UFOs and the government. The other Watchers jumped up and followed him. Jeff sighed at the irony as he hopped onto Tessie's rubbery back and floated down to the opposite end of the lake. He eventually arrived and had an uneventful trip until he'd gotten close to Stone Henge.
There was a loud explosion in the direction of the lab followed by a series of grunts and howls. Jeff ran over to his father's lab to see that everything looked alright. But suddenly a stampede of Cave Men busted out of the lab and ran away terrified. Dr. Andonuts followed waving his fist in the air screaming, "Ingrates! Dare you dismiss the brain power of Dr. And-oh hi Jeff."
He stopped suddenly in front of his son, hugged him, and then began to walk with him to the lab, "I'd forgotten you were coming over today. You need the Sky Runner right?"
"Yeah dad thanks, but what were you doing with those Cave Men?"
"That was my newest experiment. I was trying to use a new machine to make them more intelligent, but I guess loud explosions and machines that spew fire frighten their puny Cave Men minds."
Jeff laughed at this and hugged his dad goodbye as he climbed into the Sky Runner. He entered the coordinates and took off. Instead of enjoying the scenery below him, he was preoccupied with his calculations for his summer project. He was so preoccupied that he didn't notice that the Sky Runner was losing altitude over Onett due to the fact that his father had forgotten to refuel the machine the night before because he'd become fascinated with the anatomical structure of his pizza box. Jeff looked up just in time to see the Peaceful Theater collide with the side of his machine.
He awoke a few minutes later with a very bad headache. It took him a few minutes to realize what had happened, but he remembered suddenly when the building burst into flames. He instantly blasted a hole in the wall with one of his guns, providing a safe way out for him and everyone else in the building. Before anyone could ask questions, he used his new Shrink-O-Matic to shrink down the broken Sky Runner and run off with it. He ran into an alley and into an old abandoned building. Well, he thought it was abandoned.
"Hey!" Said a voice from behind him, "You're in MY hideout! Get out bub!"
Jeff turned to see a kid who appeared to be about fourteen years old with a mullet, "Oh, I'm just passing through here, if I could just maybe share your 'hideout' with you for a little while, it would be greatly appreciated."
"I said get out stupid!"
"Well in that case, I'm reminded of an old saying we had at Winters, 'Those who live in glass houses shouldn't-BLAHRGHEN!" Upon his crazed scream, Jeff pulled out his new Brainshock Gun. This gun had all of the effects of the PSI move, Brainshock. He scored a direct hit with the kid's eyes. The kid stood dazed for a little while until he suddenly grabbed his nearby backpack and ran out of the room screaming, "I AM DARK WING DUCK!"
Jeff stood in wonder for a few moments but could only say, "Huh, well that's never happened before...well it should wear off eventually..." He shrugged and made the Sky Runner normal size again. He then pulled out a small device from his backpack and, upon setting it down next to the Sky Runner, pushed a big shiny button on it. The machine sprang into life and many tiny mechanical hands sprang out of the machine and began fixing the Sky Runner.
This is turning out to be an even better day than I though it would be though Jeff I've been able to try out all kinds of new inventions. Unfortunately, his revelry was cut short when a person came bursting through the nearby door which, in turn, smacked Jeff in the face. Jeff got up to see a large number of news reporters come through the door as if they were following the other person. Jeff's repairing machine made a pinging noise to show that it was done. Upon hearing the noise, one of the news crews stopped dead and looked at the newly repaired Sky Runner and then at Jeff. Sky Runner, Jeff, Sky Runner, Jeff. This went on for a few moments until he called out to the other reporters and soon Jeff was surrounded.
The reporters began to swarm him with questions, "Are you the one that crashed into the Peaceful Theater?" "Are you some kind of space alien?" "What is the average amount of rainfall in the Amazon Basin?" Eventually Jeff couldn't take it anymore and he dove into the Sky Runner and burst out of the building and down the street until he reached the old abandoned house at the point near the ocean. He landed the Sky Runner safely inside of the house through the gaping hole in the back wall. This was where he planned on starting his summer project, but he'd need some things for it first.
He pulled out his checklist and began to read it out loud, "Mineral water, a broken dishwasher, and raw plutonium. Well the last to might be a little hard to find...I'll look for mineral water first." He put the list away and walked out of the poor excuse for a house and out onto the cheery streets of Onett. He was passing the Burger Shop when a man that Jeff recognized as Frank Fly charged out of the place and right into Jeff.
Frank got up quickly and spoke in a very surprised tone, "Oh hello Jeff can'ttalknowgottagobye!" Jeff was wondering what was wrong with Frank when he felt something bump into his leg. He looked down to see a bottle of mineral water that Frank must have dropped. He laughed to himself as he picked it up and went back to the run down shack.
Upon his arrival, he was surprised to see the Onett police force putting road blocks up at the front door. Jeff waded his way through the police cars and roadblocks and marched up to Captain Strong, "What are you people doing here?"
"Well we heard from a reporter that this was the place that that thing that crashed into the Peaceful Theater landed here! Wait a minute...green uniform, blond hair, big head...you're the guy that witnesses said they saw fleeing from the scene!"
"My heads not big..."
"Are you listening to me?"
"Yes, yes, I intend to pay for the damages to the owner tomorrow and I-"
"Well you'd better pay him off soon! He said that if he didn't get the money by seven o'clock, he'd start having us arrest suspects!"
"Erm well okay then...thanks." And with that, Jeff walked away from the shack and ran all of the way over to the Peaceful Theater. He was relieved to see the owner standing out in front gazing at the damage.
"Excuse me sir," began Jeff nervously, "I-I'm the one who did the damage, I'm here to pay for it."
"WHAAAT? Kids like you shouldn't be flying around into buildings! You should be home calling somebody a name on the internet!"
"I'm very sorry sir. It was an accident...here; this should be much more than enough to pay for the damages!" The owner looked to see that Jeff had taken out a huge wad of money out of his wallet. Enough money to not only pay for the damages, but build another theater. As the owner looked at the huge wad of cash, his eyes grew big and he began to sweat. He suddenly clutched his chest and fell over unconscious.
Within moments Jeff had called the hospital and was in the ambulance on the way to the hospital. When the paramedics weren't paying attention to Jeff, he slipped the wad of cash into the owner's pocket. After the ambulance had arrived at the hospital and the owner had been reeled out, Jeff began to walk back home when a surgeon that looked almost exactly like him stopped him in the parking lot, "Hey there sonny, can I have that mineral water, I'm parched!"
Jeff looked down to see that he was still holding on to the mineral water from earlier. Before he could even say anything, the surgeon had grabbed it and took a small sip. His face lit up suddenly and he began to gulp the entire thing down. He began stumbling around and then spoke to Jeff in a slurred voice, "Thunks kid, you wannaname tag fer yerself hic!" Once again, before Jeff could respond, the surgeon had pulled off his name tag and put it on Jeff. He then stumbled away only to fall asleep in the back of a pickup truck.
Jeff wondered what was in that mineral water when he heard a voice from behind him, "There you are Dr. Armstrong!" Jeff turned to see an intern running up to him, "We've been waiting for you to come and perform the operation in front of the visiting med students!"
"Oh, I'm not a doctor I-"
"Now I've heard you're a modest person before, although I've never seen you before, you match his description, although you look surprisingly young. Now come on lets get you into your scrubs!" The man dragged Jeff into the hospital while completely ignoring his protests. Within seconds he was in the scrubs and ready to operate. He was ushered out and into the operating room. On his way there, he could have sworn he saw Ness getting wheeled into a room.
Jeff was thrust into the operating room to see that other surgeons were already working on the patient and that a large group of med students were watching from behind a large window. Jeff nervously walked up to the patient and another surgeon forced a scalpel into his hands although he was still insisting that he was not Dr. Armstrong. The other surgeons just dismissed his pleas and said something about Dr. Armstrong always being a kidder. Jeff panicked and began to speak and operate, to his surprise, well.
"Now, a snip here and a sew there, and bam! We have successfully removed the patient's appendix!" Jeff looked up triumphantly only to see all of the other surgeons glaring at him, "We're removing his left kidney..." Said one suspiciously. Jeff instantly threw off his mask and gloves and charged out into the hallway, out of the hospital, and all of the way back to his shack. He was thankful to see that the cops had left and he ran into the house and packed up all of his things onto the Sky Runner. He jumped in and flew back to Winters. On his way back to his bed at the lab, he thought about how productive this day had been. Sure he never got to start on his project, but he got to try out a few of his new inventions and that was all that really mattered to a man of science such as Jeff Andonuts.
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Poo's Story
The sun rose over the cloud-filled landscape that gently moved under the floating island of Dallam as a boy sat on the highest point in the country and watched, meditating. After having his arms and legs taken from him more times than he could count that morning, the young prince of Dallam decided that he'd had enough meditation and it was time for him to go about his day as he had planned. His first act of the day was to fling himself into the clouds below the island. As the air rushed passed him and he hit the white puffs of perspiration, Poo activated his Teleport ability. He soon noticed that he was beginning to fly towards the ground at a quickly increasing speed. The mountains rushed passed him as did the birds, the trees, and soon the ground was coming up to meet his face. He was inches away from certain death, when he blinked out of existence.
He blinked back into existence shortly however just off of the coast of Summers. Well, a little above the coast of Summers actually, as he had appeared twenty feet above the water. He curled into a ball and splashed into the warm salty ocean below. His method of teleportation was needlessly dramatic, but Poo liked it nonetheless. Within a few seconds he had climbed up onto the shore and dried himself off. There were no beach goers as it was still early in the morning. Poo stretched out a bit and then prepared for his next task. He had come to Summers to see the sights for a day. He had no idea where to go, what to do, or what he should eat. In short he was there as a tourist.
Poo started to walk around the town and saw that it was still too early in the morning for much to be open; he rounded a corner and walked past a small alley when he heard a shriek. He poked his head around the corner to see a large hooded creature looming over a woman and a dead man.
Poo instantly got into a fighting stance and screamed, "Lay your hands off of them creature of darkness! Taste my fist!" He lunged at the creature and kicked it directly in its hooded face. To Poo's surprise the creature let out a wimpy, "Ouchies!" and toppled over backwards. He hit the side of the "alley" and tipped it over. Poo looked with surprise to see that it was painted cardboard.
To his even greater surprise the dead man got up and began speaking, "Great! Now we have to shoot the scene over again! Thanks a lot!"
"You're welcome." Said the bewildered prince. The woman ran over to the "monster" and helped him stand up. It pulled its hood back to reveal a disgruntled man with a broken nose. At that moment a man wearing odd pants and expensive sunglasses waddled up to Poo, "You idiot! Do you realize what you've done you moron?"
"I was defending this woman. I did not intend any harm. Please, I am rather new to this country and am confused about your people's customs, I am sorry if I offended you." He gave a deep bow. This only caused the short man more exasperation, "Let me explain it to you in words you can understand. This is a movie set. You know moving pictures? Those guys are actors and I'm the director! What you toppled over was a set that was very expensive and youruinedityoumoronichalfbrainednincompoop-" The passing traffic drowned out the next few words, but Poo was certain that he didn't like them anyways and he was loosing his patience with the tiny man.
"Sir, I do not like your tone. I am sorry but I must leave now. Good day!" The director jumped in front of him and shouted at him red-faced, "You had better pay for the damages you-" Again, traffic, "or I'll press charges!"
"Oh, is this about money?" He withdrew two large red gems from his pockets, "Well then I hope this will be enough..." The director's face shifted from red to a sickly green in seconds. Before Poo knew it, the gems were out of his hands and the director was off running to his chair, giggling like a school girl.
Poo shrugged at the oddities of foreigners and continued on his way. It was a little later in the day now and shops were opening. He walked into the one that looked the most appealing, the Floating Island Store of Low Priced Goods. As he entered the store, Poo noticed first that the word "Summers" was on almost every piece of merchandise in the store. Poo wandered over to the various souvenirs and looked at them for about an hour. Eventually the owner of the store, from behind the cash register, began shouting, "Hey boy! You gonna buy something? We have a policy against loitering!"
"Good shop keep, do you know the prices on these goods?"
The owner grabbed the clothes that Poo had picked up and ran them through the register, "The total comes to...$50.00"
Poo thought for a moment before handing over the money, "Are you sure that this isn't what my friends called, 'a bad deal'? I've been to Summers before, but I've never been able to see the sites and look at its various stores."
At this moment the gears in the sleazy owner's greasy head, "Oh, well would you look at that? I got the decimal wrong, the real total comes to...$500.00"
"Are you sure?"
"I've never been more certain sir!" said the man as he quickly grabbed the naive Poo's money, "And while you're at it, why don't you go and see the world's largest ball of sand? It's owned by my brother and it's just down the street."
"Thank you good shop keep! You have shown me kindness beyond words." He gave a deep bow and left the store. The owner began giggling to himself, not realizing that the person behind Poo in line was a cop that had seen the whole thing.
Poo walked out of a nearby bathroom a few minutes later wearing his new clothes; an "I survived the Kraken battle of '9X" t-shirt, blue shorts with large yellow s's on the sides, and waving a small, "I Poo paid the admittance and entered another small room. He stared up in awe at the large dried ball. The owner was talking to other people dressed very similar to Poo, "Yes ladies and gentlemen, this amazing ball of dried sand stands at an incredible diameter of thirty feet! And believe it or not ladies and gentlemen, small plastic replicas can be yours for the low low price of seventy dollars!"
"We must obey, he has a tie!" Said one of the tourists, the others followed suit. While this was happening, Poo had gotten curious as to the feel of a giant ball of sand. He reached out and poked it with his finger, causing it to collapse and send sand flying everywhere in the room. The owner screamed in shock and dismay as he ran over to Poo and grabbed him by the collar, "You little, you ruined my, they're all, you stupid, GAHGLESHMORT!" And with that final enraged noise, he threw Poo angrily out of the building.
Poo looked around to see that he had been thrown into a seedy back alley; he began to walk back into the store to apologize when he was clubbed in the back of the head with a blackjack. He awoke an hour later to find that he had been tied to a chair in the alley. He looked around to find a group of mobsters staring right at him. The shortest one ran up to him and began to question him, "Hey you! How did you find our secret hideout?"
"Secret hideout? I thought that this was just a normal alley..."
"What?" The mobster turned to the tallest one of their group, "Yo Tony! I thought that you said that the invisibility cloak was around this place!"
"It is Rocko; the Sci-Fi monthly magazine said that it was a real Klingon cloaking device but I think those blockheads lied!" He pounded his fist in his hands angrily.
The normal sized mobster spoke, "You wanna I should take cara dem?"
"Fo'get about it Bruno." Said Rocko, he then turned to see that Poo was gone. During their conversation, Poo had turned himself into a nearby pebble and rolled out of the chair. He turned back into himself right in front of Rocko, much to his surprise. Poo reached back his hand and prepared to punch him when the mobster shouted suddenly, "STOP!"
Poo lowered his fist for a moment to listen to what he had to say, "That was an interesting trick, we could use you."
"You are criminals, I will not help you!"
"We're not criminals, Bruno, we criminals?"
"Well boss we are-" he was quickly elbowed in his side by Tony, "-definitely not criminals!"
"See? We only knocked you out earlier because we thought that you were a criminal trying to mug us!"
"Really?"
"Yes my Dallamees friend, really. You see, we have a friend in Twoson who says that the Department Store is closed today, and the owner of the store hasn't been paying us back for our agreement for him. So we're gonna go and take pay it for him by confiscating some objects. Using your skills, we could get past the security much easier."
"I don't know, that sounds a lot like some kind of crime..."
"But my foreign friend, this is how things work in this country. Isn't that right Tony?"
"Yeah Rocko!"
Poo thought for a moment and then spoke, "I will aid you. It is my duty as a Chosen One to help those in need!"
"Erm, yeah, well get in the car around the corner. It'll take us to the airport, and then we'll leave for Twoson."
"I can take you there now. I have a teleportation ability."
The mobsters all gave Poo a strange look for a few moments. Poo sighed and began to concentrate. The mobsters began to scream like babies as they began to spin around faster and faster beyond their control. Within seconds they found themselves in front of the Twoson Department Store in the middle of a rainstorm.
Rocko began stuttering in amazement, "How did you? We were just! I was! INCREDIBLE!" He pulled out a small cell phone and dialed a number, "Yeah Gordy? Meet us inside the store in a few minutes...yeah; we got here sooner than expected. I'll explain when you get here now hurry!"
He put away the cell phone and pointed at the front door of the Department Store. A sign that read "Closed for Remodeling" hung from it. Rocko assured Poo however, that there wasn't anybody remodeling at the time, or so his informant had said. Poo turned himself into a chipmunk and scurried in-between the glass doors. He turned himself back to normal again and then disarmed the security system. The other mobsters entered the store and instantly began their looting and vandalizing.
After a couple of hours of this, another person entered the store. It was a man wearing a ridiculous hat and bearing large bruises all over his face. Rocko ran up to him and began speaking, "Gordy? Why are you late? And what happened to you?"
"I don't want to talk about it...who's this kid?" He said, waving his sling-ridden arm at Poo.
"Oh, this is Poo; he's how we got here so fast. Poo, this is Gordy, our informant." As Rocko began to explain things to Gordy, Poo wandered off to a toy store. He casually slid behind the counter and pressed the silent alarm. He quickly ran back to the mobsters.
"Poo," began Bruno, "where'd you run off to?"
"Just wanted to see the toy store for a few moments. You know, just looking at the games, seeing the DVD's, triggering the silent alarm."
"Oh all right I was just-YOU WHAT?"
"What? You didn't honestly think I was that naive did you? I was just waiting for the last of your friends to arrive before I stopped your robbery. Now do you want to give up peacefully?"
Rocko jumped forward waving a gun, "Fat chance! Time for a dirt nap!" He fired the gun to find that Poo was already behind him. He was out cold before he even knew what had happened. The other two mobsters began to draw their guns but were stopped when Poo did a spinning kick into their faces. He turned to see that Gordy was gone.
Poo ran out of the front doors to see him running down the side walk. He wasn't looking and he ran into someone. Without looking up Gordy began yelling, "WHY DON'T YA WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING YOU STUPID-" he looked up, "OH MY GOD WHY!"
"I piddy da foo dat runs into Mistuh T after already crossin' him earlier in da day!"
Poo dragged Gordy's unconscious body back into the store and set him next to the others. He heard police sirens and quickly teleported back to Dallam.
Poo returned to find that in the Dallam time zone, it was already night time. He entered his throne room and was greeted by one of his servants, "Prince Poo, how was your day among the foreigners?"
Poo thought for a moment and then said, "It was a nice place to visit, but I wouldn't want to live there."
-------------------------The End----------------------------