TITLE: Life Signs
AUTHOR: Dantzi Jean
E-MAIL: phantom_lass@hotmail.com
WEBSITE: My Voice in the World of X-Files Fanfiction http://www.geocities.com/myxfvoice
RATING: PG
TIMELINE: Pre-S8
CATEGORY: MSR, Fluff, MPOV
SPOLIERS: Not a one.
ARCHIVE: Please drop me a line, I like to visit my babies ;-) And leave my name and headers on the fic.
FEEDBACK: Have you ever seen 'no' written in this spot?????
DISCLAIMER: Only the idea is mine, everything else belongs to...hmmm...good question.
DEDICATION: This one goes to my long-time boyfriend Xeng, whose constant worry and sometimes nagging keeps me going. ;-)
AUTHOR'S NOTES: I wrote this in one hour, out of boredom and out of some creative juices that were brought together in primordial soup to form conscious thought and then this fic.
SUMMARY: In...out...in...out...the slow breath and the steady vibration of her heart.
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I wait. I watch. I see. Her chest moves rhythmically, up...down...up...down. Over and over, as constant as the ocean tides. Each breath drinking in precious oxygen. Something disturbs her sleep and the rhythm is interrupted, before returning, once again, to its previous state of easy relaxation.
I lift my arm from its resting place at my side and place it on her chest, above the heart and her breasts. At first, I feel nothing, then comes the reassuring, slow motion of her heart. The life-giving vibrations run through my fingers and my hand, to my arm, traveling through my sinews and muscles. Until the pulse that I feel through her skin climbs into my own chest and starts to bring my own heart to its slow cadence. As if we are two drums in a band, playing in perfect time with the other, one dependant on the other's rhythm to survive.
I watch her face. Her slightly down turned chin tucked into the crook of my shoulder, her warm breath warms my skin and heats my blood with the fire of passion, of love, and from a never-ending devotion. Her lips, ripe, and full relax, far from the pressures of the outside world. Her eyes, closed against the garish light of day, welcome their respite from life. The deep blue color of those hidden orbs, remind me of the sky, hidden by the night, but with the dawn the blue shines its way into my soul and chases all my demons and makes them hide with the light. Her eyelids flutter, for a split second. They move so fast, that I'm not sure I actually see it. She dreams. It's amazing, with the daily monstrosities she sees every day and the horrors she faces, she dreams still. I haven't dreamt for a very long time.
My eyes come to rest on the top of her head, her bright coppery hair gleams in the moonbeams that make their way through the small crevices in the blinds that shade the window. The separate strands shimmer and each become a living flame, burning bright, strong, and true. One errant strand falls in front of her eyes, across her forehead and my fingers tremble as they warily push the disobedient lock back into its proper place behind her ear. The corners of my mouth turn upward as I know she would never let me do that if she were awake. She hates when I push her hair away from her face.
I take in all of her. Her scent, her warmth, and the way her body melds to mine when we sleep. This tiny package contains my life, my soul, my body, and my mind. Some people wait their entire lives to change the world. She does it with a gesture, a look, a sound, with one message she changes the world through my eyes, and nothing has ever been the same. This tiny woman changed my life. It never manages to escape me how this life hangs on so tenuously. As a carnival actor on a high wire, she balances through life. Life can be taken away swiftly, with a single gunshot, with one blow to the head, with one careless mistake, or it can be taken slowly, drained and sapped from the body. I can loose her very easily. That knowledge is constantly my guide, and my compass.
'I love you' is not enough for her, not nearly enough. To say that would only be touching a branch of a tree when reaching for a star. She's my life force. She breathed life to me through her honesty, she made my heart beat strong and true with her determination. She was the mirror or my dreams and my truth with her strength. She is my precious oxygen.
I will make it up to her one day. I will give her life, I will breathe for her, and make her heart beat with the rhythm of life. If I was put on earth to do anything, it was to give this woman life. My love, my life. I will be content to watch and wait, for now. But one day I will compensate her, and the debt will be paid in full.
In...out...in...out...the slow breath ad the steady vibration of her heart. Tenuous and strong. Love and life. You and I, forever.
*****************THE END************************