A/N: Okay, so I made a comic book of the Clique after BaT's came out. My friends all laughed at this, so I decided to put it on FF in script form. I know we all love the Clique, but sometimes, you just can't help making fun of it.

First chapter's really crappy. It doesn't go along with the book but the rest of them will. Hope you enjoy it!

Disclaimer: don't own, don't own. If I did, I'd make it a comic book.

First Day of School (8th grade)

BOCD

The Great Lawn

Tuesday, September 8th

7:38 A.M.

Massie slipped on her very expensive D&G sunglasses and scanned the crowd for her friends. The school was toe-dally infested with boys, but she knew she would make it through the day as long as she got at least ten ego-boosting complements and a fresh load of Glossip Girl. Most of all, she wanted to be reunited with her friends, the girls she had dearly missed all summer. She quickly spotted them and sauntered over like one of those extremely bored supermodels. The Pretty Committee was finally reunited!

Kristen: so, how's everybody doing this year?

Massie: man, look at that sevie's ugly outfit. She has NO taste. (flips hair)

Dylan: (sob!) I just (burp) gained 0.00001 pounds!

Alicia: ooooh! Look at all those CUTE boyzzz!

Claire: I can't BELIEVE Cam dumped me AGAIN! (Sobs)

Kristen: oh boy…this is gonna be a long day. (rolls eyes)

Massie: please excuse me; I feel a rush of power…must...destroy…someone! (twitches uncontrollably)

Dylan: do you think the fat is noticeable?

Alicia: GASP! (choke) They're coming closer!

Claire: ehmagawd, is Cam there?

Massie: Kuh-laire, are you a midget?

Claire: uh, no?

Massie: then get over him!

Alicia: shhh…here they come!

Dylan: I'm outta here! I don't want them to see how fat I got! (Runs away)

Kristen: uh, I'll go with you!

The boys come closer, but stay a safe distance, talking amongst themselves.

Massie: pretend they're not there! We're better than them! Act like they don't exist! Let them come to us!

Claire: Yes of course! You're so wise, Massie!

Alicia: but, but… (sputtering uncontrollably)….okay, fine. (contorts her pretty features into an adorable pout)

Massie: ehmaGAWD, my lips are SO dry! I only drenched them 58.5 times today in a thick delicious coat of caramel fudge sundae! Need…gloss…

Alicia: hey, did you know that Glossip Girl just made a new flavor called caramel double fudge sundae?

Massie: NO WAY…that's so ah-mazing! By my calculations, that little newsflash deserves precisely 3.4675 gossip points.

Alicia: ehmagawd, I'm like, toe-dally slipping! Opposite of cool! I mean, I know that wasn't the best gossip, but…

Massie: hey, it's JUICY, 'cause it's about lip gloss! Get it? (slaps knee and laughs heartily)

Claire & Alicia: (blank stares)

Massie: um, hullo? For the love of GAWD, laugh! We have to look like we're having fun!

Claire & Alicia: (burst into fits of hysterical laughter)

Derrick Harrington finally decides to approach the girls.

D: hey ladies!

Massie: hey lady.

Alicia (who has been suffering tremendously from cute guy withdrawl): hi… (giggles)

Claire: (who has been suffering tremendously from Cam Fisher/gummy worm withdrawl): where's Cam? I want him to give me my gummy worms!

Alicia: (drools while little hearts dance over her head)

D: Cam has gummy worms? I want some!

Massie: honey, you shouldn't eat those. They'll give you rotten stinky teeth.

Claire: (sighs) I know. (cheeks redden)

D: did you just call me "honey?" (eyes widen)

Massie: (flips hair) I wasn't tawking to you, doorknob.

Claire: Yay Massie! You're so cool!

D: whatever, Block.

Massie: (ahem) I'd like you to call me "Miss Universe."

D: "Miss Universe?" AHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Massie: I can feel my horns growing in…must use my lightening of rage!

CRACK! KABOOM!

So yeah. That was my attempt at a Clique parody. Did it totally suck? Or was it okay?

If you haven't noticed, I portrayed Massie as a power-hungry diva with raging superpowers. (I know, I'm a nerd)

Claire was a Cam-obsessed Massie-worshipping gummy worm addict.

Alicia was the boy-crazy beta who didn't want to get in the way of her alpha.

Dylan was the girl who couldn't stand being fat.

And I couldn't really think of anything to make fun of for Kristen, so I just made her the normal girl.

Anyway, review this if you liked it. If more people like it, I'll continue writing.

Love,

Juicyfruit007

PS: Also, those of you who read TBAMFS, tell me how it was! Was it actually good, or just another book I can make fun of?