B/N First off, this fic is not by Keri, Lindsay or me, but by my cousin Kelly, since she doesn't have the internet. Poor child. However, she reads fanfiction when she goes to work with her dad sometimes, and has therefore written some of her own. So, being the wonderful person that I am (heh heh…), I told her that I'd type some up for her. So over the summer, there may be several stories of hers up, so keep your eyes peeled! I haven't done much editing on this, either, besides spelling and grammar (though there weren't too much of those errors). Oh, but Kelly, sweets, "idiot" only has one t
Far AwaySasuke rubbed his burning eyes thinking to himself, Don't cry over him. If he wants to go through with this, then fine. I don't care. If he wants to ruin his life, then he should just go ahead and ruin it. That idiot…
He sniffed, wiping away the last stray tears from his previous outburst with his brother. Itachi never got angry with Sasuke. He always listened but…due to all those "damn drugs", his brother's head was majorly messed up and he wouldn't listen to reason! He was blinded by all these drugs and alcohol, and deaf to everything his friends warned him about.
Sasuke was so heartbroken and had gotten so upset when Itachi had screamed and yelled at him in such a harsh way. His words returned to him now as he sat huddled in the branches of the tree that he always fled to when he was upset.
"Who cares what you think, you little twerp?! It's my life! You just don't matter in it!"
Don't matter? Sasuke croaked in his mind. He said I meant everything to him once. And…he means so much to me still.
"Why?" he whispered out load, hugging his knees closer to his chest. "I thought…I…"
This time, this placeMisused, mistakes
Too long, too late
Who was I to make you wait?
Itachi's footsteps were silent on the earth below. He stopped at the foot of the tree he knew Sasuke was sitting in and hesitated. Did he dare look up, for fear of what state his words had turned Sasuke into? He put his hand on the rough bark and pressed his palm against it until he felt warm blood trickling down his hand. Then, he forced he forced himself to look up into the branches of the autumn tree. Sasuke's back was to him but Itachi could see that he was huddled in a tight little ball.
He took his hand away from the bark and stared at the wounds he had given it.
This bark and I are a lot alike. We don't mean to hurt people. All we want is peace. But there are things that can manipulate us into hurting people. I manipulated this bark into hurting me and those stupid drugs manipulated me into hurting everyone, especially my little brother. Come on, Itachi. You're so much smarter than that. Why the hell did you accept those things? It was in preschool when we learned about drug abuse. You idiot.
Just one chance, just one breath
Just in case there's just one left
'Cause you know,
You know, you know
Itachi looked back up at Sasuke again and sighed quietly, hoping he wouldn't hear him.
Please forgive me, Sasuke-kun. I pray I haven't lost you due to my selfishness. I hope you still have the power to forgive your older, foolish brother. If you do forgive me, then I vow by my own blood on this hand that I will never hurt you like this ever again. And, again…I pry you'll forgive me. Please…
Itachi closed his eyes and took another breath, thinking about what Kakashi had told him after the little "Battle Between Brothers".
"Don't just stand here and stare. Go after him. There's still time to set things right. There's always time. Just because I decide to ignore it doesn't mean you have to. I'm no influence on you, anyway. Now go! Before I sick my dogs on you."
Itachi took yet another deep breath.
Come on. Whatever happens, happens. I won't be surprised if he rejects me after that. Good luck.
With that thought in mind, Itachi quietly and carefully climbed up the rough tree trunk towards his little brother.
That I love you; I have loved you all alongAnd I miss you; been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me, and you'll never go
Stop breathing if I don't see you anymore
Sasuke couldn't stop the flow of memories of him with his brother from running through his head as he sat alone in the crisp, autumn afternoon. All the times Itachi had been there when no one else had been. He was always there when he really, really needed a shoulder to cry on; when he needed someone's arms around him to protect him while he released his hurting; when all he wanted was someone who truly, honestly understood how hard life was for him.
He was well aware that Sakura had always been there too, and that did mean a lot to Sasuke but…for some reason…Itachi meant more. He was Sasuke's brother, after all. Ever since Itachi had returned to the Leaf, a changed man, Sasuke had changed too. He was no longer afraid to let his tears run down his face and break past the dam he had built so long ago to hold them back. He could let all of his feelings come out. Itachi had been the "cure" to Sasuke's "sickness" all along. He felt so much better since his brother returned to him.
But…now he felt that Itachi, his medicine, was his poison. Sasuke's grip around his knees tightened and he felt hot tears at the corners of his eyes. He squeezed them shut and forced himself to fix the crack on his dam.
Brother…why?
On my knees, I'll ask
Last chance for one last dance
'Cause with you, I'd withstand
All of hell to hold your hand
Behind Sasuke, Itachi was walking up the tree's branches, just as if they were stairs. He had to duck under a few, but he managed to make it without much difficulty, and sat on the branch about a foot away from Sasuke, his back to him, his legs hanging off the edge of the branch. He sighed and turned his face towards the sky. Sasuke opened his eyes but restrained himself from looking at his brother.
He wanted to run away, as far away from Itachi as he could. All he wanted was anyone but Itachi sitting in the branch beside him. Anyone at all! And when he wanted to run, he found that he couldn't move. All he could do was sit there and wait for what Itachi would say. Was he back to finish screaming at him and hurt him even more?
Please, no, Sasuke begged to himself over and over again. Please, no. I can't bear it. God, I just can't!…
Itachi's mouth opened, but no words came out. He turned his head away from the sky and stared down at the ground.
Say something, you jerk or else you'll really lose him! His conscience screamed in his head
Shut up! I'll come up with something soon. I'm Mr. Perfect First Born, after all. Or…not so perfect…
He sighed again and began his long apology.
"Sasuke…I'm really sorry about this. I don't know what came over me when I accepted those…poisons."
He struggled with his words, trying to make as convincing an apology as possible to win back his little brother.
"And…when I yelled at you before? That wasn't me talking. I wouldn't say things like that…ever. I never wanted to hurt you again when I came back. But there I went, getting addicted and upsetting everyone. And I do realize that I am one, huge Itachi-baka."
I'd give it all, I'd give for usGive anything, but I won't give up!
'Cause you know,
You know, you know!
Itachi stole a glance at Sasuke, who still refused to look at him. Itachi looked back at the sky, continuing his apology.
"A simple 'I'm sorry' doesn't seem like enough to me to make up for what happened. And I suck at putting serious words together to make a real apology. So…I really don't know what to say. Honestly, I'm counting on my mouth entirely to come up with something."
Okay, that was stupid. I should just give up. I'll try just one more thing, though, and see what happens.
"I was really, really, unbelievable idiotic and stupid and way out of line. I understand if you never want to see me or speak to me ever again. I entirely go along with it. You didn't deserve to be spoken to the way I spoke to you. I guess I got that from dad."
Sasuke squeezed his eyes shut, thinking about his father. Itachi was right. Their father had never cared about Sasuke. They never spoke to one another unless Father was screaming, scolding, reprimanding…Sasuke had feared him when he was little. He rested his hand on his knees and silently cried into them.
"The point is…" Itachi continued, "…that I…I…"
He looked back at Sasuke again, his heart aching as he held back his desire to throw his arms around his little brother's shoulders and hold his head against his chest to let him cry there.
"…I…"
What? Sasuke's mind screamed. Say whatever it is you want to say and just go away! Leave me alone!
"Sasuke-kun…"
"Sasuke's shoulders were shaking as he cried, and it made Itachi reluctant to leave after he said what he wanted to, which was, for some reason, very hard to do. Finally, he sort of blurted the words out.
"I love you, little brother."
That I love you, I have loved you all alongAnd I miss you, been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me and you'll never go
Stop breathing if I don't see you anymore
How many times had Itachi said that in the past? Had he ever really meant it? He'd always said it when something had deeply upset Sasuke just to make him feel at least a little bit better. Were they only five words of comfort, or did they mean so much more?
Sasuke didn't know what to believe. Were the words just a trick to lure him into a trap or the truth from his real brother's heart. Sasuke felt torn. He searched desperately for an answer, his heart and tears racing.
"Sasuke?" Itachi asked hopefully.
But Sasuke couldn't answer, and Itachi got the message that that had been his last, failed chance.
"Okay. I get it. You never want to see me or hear from me ever again. I should have known."
So far away (so far away), been far away for far too long So far away (so far away), been far away for far too longBut you know, you know
You know!
Itachi jumped off the branch and landed in a crouch on the ground. When he stood up, he walked away, taking one last long look up at his brother, whom he cared so much for.
Let him go. You can't force him to forgive you. If only I could hold him one more time before I leave- if only I could…I've ruined everything that was my new life! God! If I could go back in time and stop myself from accepting those drugs, believe me, Sasuke, I would.
It was hard for Itachi to take his eyes away from Sasuke, but once his eyes were on the path, he couldn't keep them there. He ended up looking at his wounded hand, thinking about what he did to everyone by taking drugs. His throat became sore and his heart began to ache even more.
Just go home, pack your things, and find yourself a new apartment, his thoughts sobbed.
His eyes began to burn, but he held back his own tears as hard as possible, still walking forward, his shoulders shaking.
No! Don't cry over your mistake! Just don't…!
But without his command, one, single, stray tear rolled down his left cheek.
Everything's ruined…
I wanted
I wanted you to stay
'Cause I needed-
I need to hear you say
Sasuke's entire body was trembling madly as he cried into his knees, trying so hard to decide what to believe. He tried to escape his troubled mind, screaming theories back and forth
Stop! Let me think! Help! God, help me!
He tore himself away from his screaming thoughts and desperately searched the air.
What do I do? What do I do? Please! Someone give me an answer…!
But he wasn't granted one. He was forced to decide on his own.
"I don't know," he cried quietly so Itachi wouldn't hear, holding his waist, "I just don't-"
He stared at the landscape before him that he'd never noticed before. There was a mass of lush, rolling green hills that seemed to never end. They just kept flowing into the vast, never ending rainbow sky. How many sunsets had they sat and watched together since Itachi had returned? How many? How many times had Itachi sat at Sasuke's bedside when he was ill and comforted him? How many soft words had he spoken?
How? How many? How many times? How long ago was that? How much I miss it…
Sasuke gazed at the colors again and the dark clouds that played the images of Itachi's face. Sasuke abruptly turned and stared at the receding form of his brother. He was already so far away. Would Sasuke be able to catch up if he decided to go after him?
"Wait!" Sasuke called, jumping out of the tree.
That I love you,
I have loved you all along
And I forgive you
For being away for far too long
I've ruined everything. I no longer have any friends or family. God, why didn't you stop me?
Itachi glared up into the heavens, a few tears gleaming at the corners of his eyes. He couldn't hold onto the glare, though, due to the tears fighting to fall out over his face. He sniffed and wiped them away.
It's the end of the book…my old, yellowed, torn book has finally been closed. You knew it would end eventually. I just didn't think that it would end like this. I prayed for a happy ending. But I should have known that everything else symbolized a tragic ending…Sasuke, I'm so sorry.
He shivered at the thought of never seeing Sasuke again after he had been so happy to be reunited with him
Should I commit suicide, get reincarnated, and try again? Yeah right.
However, the thought of suicide got Itachi thinking. Maybe Sasuke would realize how sorry he was and how much he loved him. But then, Itachi would be dead. What would the point be? That fact didn't come to him in time. His hand was already strapped to his shuriken holder strapped to his leg.
Goodbye…
But before he opened the holder, someone ran into him, stopping him in his tracks. He didn't need to turn around to know it was his little brother. Sasuke's arms were around Itachi's face and Itachi felt his face in his back.
"Please don't go," Sasuke cried, his shoulders shaking, "I miss you too much already."
So keep breathing, 'cause I'm not leaving you anymore,
Believe it,
Hole on to me, never let me go
Keep breathing, 'cause I'm not leaving you anymore
Itachi turned to face Sasuke, who took a small step back and stared at the ground, tears running down his face.
"Promise me you'll never do something stupid like this again," he sobbed, meeting his brother's gaze.
Itachi drew Sasuke closer and put his arms around his waist while Sasuke wrapped his arms around his brother's shoulders. He cried there for a minute or two, and Itachi rested his head on Sasuke's shoulder.
"I promise," Itachi replied, glancing at his bloodied hand.
I vow by the blood on this hand that I will never hurt you like this ever again…
His hand clenched into a fist.
"I'm so sorry, brother."
"It's okay, Itachi. I forgive you."
"No one else will, though."
"They will. I'll make sure of it!"
"You'd do that?"
"I love you, too, Itachi."
There was a pause and Itachi smiled, resting his dead against Sasuke's neck.
"Let's go home."
Believe it,
Hold onto me, never let me go
Hold onto me, never let me go
Hold onto me, never let me go
So what does everyone think? This is Kelly's first fanfiction being put up on this site, so reviews are greatly appreciated!! And any replies back will be from her. The moral of this story? Don't do drugs, guys. Thanks for reading!