I open my eyes,
I try to see but I'm blinded by the white light,
I opened my eyes, only to see a massive bright white light shining in my eyes and taking up my view.
So... am I suppose to go towards the light or something?
I felt myself laying on my back on damp, cold stone....
Must be pavement.
The light seemed comforting compared to the reality of where I was lying. Also to the sharp pain that was lighting my chest on fire.
Wait... sharp pain?
I can't remember how
I can't remember why
I'm lying here tonight.
Why is there a light? Where am I? Why is there a sharp pain. Just then the familiar name of someone very close to me triggered my memory.
Johnny. Johnny died.
And I lost it.
I freaked.
I got shot down by the police, and I'm left in the middle of the street to die.
Hmph. It's just the way everyone thought I , Dallas Winston, was going to go anyway.
And I can't stand the pain
And I can't make it go away
No, I can't stand the pain
Surprisingly the only pain bigger than the bullet in my chest was that the fact that Johnny was dead.
And I couldn't stand it.
And I still can't stand it.
I thought this was the solution. I thought this would make it all go away.
But it's even worse. I know I've done a lot of horrible things in my life, but does anyone really deserve this pain?
How could this happen to me?
I've made my mistakes,
got no where to run.
The night goes on as I'm fading away,
I'm sick of this life,
I just want to scream.
How could this happen to me?
Everybody's screaming,
I try to make a sound,
but no one hears me.
I could hear the gang around me. But still see no one because of the damn light in my eyes. I tried to whisper someone's name,
" Ponyboy.."
I could only manage a small whisper, and even then I lost most of my energy. I could hear Darry scream,
" YOU STUPID FREAKS!! WHY?!"
I was glad that he was yelling at the police, cause if I wasn't in this condition, I would have done it myself.
I'm slipping off the edge
I'm hanging by a thread
I want to start this over again
I heard a vehicle rush by me on the street and I thought that it was most likely be the ambulance. I was quickly pulled off of the cold hard stone and placed onto the something more suitable for my condition.
I heard someone say, " we're losing him. I think it's too late."
I change my mind... don't let me die!
So I try to hold
onto a time when nothing mattered
And I can't explain what happened
No I can't erase the things that I've done
No I can't.
A couple weeks ago, everything was fine. The gang would hang out like normal, everyone would have a good time. Johnny was still alive and wasn't in any trouble. And we would just live our life. Regret and problem free.
Now that I'm seconds away to dying, I'm full of worry and regrets.
But I can't change or erase anything of that, can I?
How could this happen to me?
I've made my mistakes,
got no where to run,
The light slowly disappeared.
the night goes on as I'm fading away,
I'm sick of this life.
I just want to scream.
The pain in my chest slowly disappeared.
How could this happen to me?
I didn't even have a chance.