Summary: It was easier to live in the comfort of his lies rather than face reality. It wasn't love, whatever it was that they had. But he had Lucas, and that was all that mattered.

Pairing:Farkle/Lucas/Riley. Rated 'M' for language and adult situations.

Notes: It's a three parter, each chapter reflecting Farkle, Lucas, and Riley's POV on their relationship.

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Chapter One: Wildest Dreams

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He should have been drowning in bliss, really. Here Farkle was, wrapped up in a bright blue blanket with Lucas's arm draped over his body, fingers ghosting over his hip. Sweat had dried into his skin, making him uncomfortably sticky-Lucas's added body heat wasn't doing anything to help that situation. That was the price, he supposed, for the previous night's activities. His hand trailed the base of his neck and collarbone, where Lucas had been particularly aggressive. He was sure the bruises would be quite visible in the morning.

If only time could stand still… He sighed as he reached down to clasp the Texan's hand in his own, shame slowly washing over him. There were only a few hours left before the sun rose, bringing with it his departure. Why do I keep doing this? Of course, the boy genius knew the answer to this. How many times had he asked himself this question?

These were the nights that Farkle lived for, where it was easiest for him to pretend that this was a normal, healthy relationship. These were the times that he could believe that Lucas truly loved him. He could push all other worries out of his mind, believe that he had finally found happiness. He could tell himself that Riley didn't matter, that he should put his desires before hers. Life wasn't fair for anyone, Riley included. Deep down, he knew better. He was disgusted with himself.

Four years ago, at the start of their high school career, Farkle had confessed his love. At the time, he had told himself he was over the bull riding Adonis, chalked it up to him idolizing the guy. On top of that, Lucas was in love with Riley; there was no way he could ever come in between the pair. So when he had finally mustered up the courage to tell Lucas his feelings, he had accepted defeat and bowed out gracefully. Lucas just wasn't into guys; Farkle's world wouldn't end because of it.

He hadn't anticipated that Lucas just might be a little receptive to the idea of being with another dude.

**Flashback**

"Look, Lucas, stop. I'm not interested." The younger teen had lead Lucas into an empty hallway, away from everyone else. It was Friday, after all: only nerds and dorks would remain on campus so late on the weekend. While Farkle was comfortable and 'out' with his friends, he didn't want the rest of the high school to know his preferences.

"Will you just hear me out?" Lucas pleaded, taking a step closer.

"No. It's not fair to anyone, Lucas. Not to me, not to Riley." Farkle could see a flash of regret cross his face. "Just...stop now. I won't tell anyone." He added softly.

"It's not like that. I'm not just stringing you along for shits and giggles-"

"Riley." Farkle gritted out. "What about your girlfriend?"

"Farkle," Lucas said softly, "Don't worry about that. I know Riley will understand." He took another step forward, causing Farkle to take a step back. The smaller teen found himself pressed against a locker. "Trust me."

"Lucas…" Blue eyes met green, and Farkle knew he lost. The last of his resolve crumbled when Lucas's lips pressed gently against his own.

/end/

A quiet groan escaped Farkle's lips and he gripped the strong, calloused hand tighter. If he hadn't been so weak, he wouldn't have gotten himself into this mess in the first place. But his life had been so lonely, so miserable-particularly after his parents divorce. There had been some good moments here and there, he wouldn't lie. And hell, he had some amazing friends. But this was the one thing Farkle had ever wanted, the only thing he felt he had been denied in his life: love. Now that he had gotten a taste for it, he wasn't about to let it go.

Lucas's hand moved up over to Farkle's stomach, and the older teen pulled him closer to his body. The movement caught Farkle off guard, and for a moment, he was drawn out of his thoughts. Small gestures like these meant the world to him. Lucas couldn't possibly fake things like this. Right?

Get it together, Farkle. He allowed his head to rest against Lucas's bare chest. There's no point in overthinking it. Even if Lucas is using me...it's not like I would leave him. He twisted his head to look at his best friend's face, and was surprised to find green eyes staring back at him. A small smile formed on his lips, despite himself.

"You're up early." Farkle commented. "What's the occasion?" He felt his smile slip. Is it time to leave already?

"I could feel your angst radiating into my dreams." Lucas's voice was thick with sleep, but it was still the sexiest thing he had ever heard. "Care to share your thoughts?"

"No, not really." They had this argument far too many times for his liking. It didn't get them anywhere. Really, the best thing to do was to ignore it at this point. After all, doing the same thing over and over again while expecting a different result was the very definition of insanity, right? "It's nothing we can fix."

"Ah, buddy...don't be like that." Lucas sat up. Farkle couldn't help but notice that the blanket was barely covering his lap. "Just talk to me."

"Really, Lucas. It's alright." Farkle did his best to give a reassuring smile. I mean, it's been four damn years. It's a little too late to end it now. Seeing the skeptical look on his partners face, he leaned forward and kissed him. "It's getting late-or, rather, it's very early. You need to leave soon, right?" His heart clenched. Back to Riley, yes? As much as he'd love to tell Lucas exactly that, he held back. He always did.

"Nah. I wanna stay with you tonight. If you'd let me?" His green eyes seemed to shine in the darkness, piercing straight through Farkle's being. It was almost as if he was daring Farkle to deny him.

"You want to...stay?" Farkle swallowed hard, butterflies erupting in his stomach. It seemed that Lucas could tell when Farkle was doubting this-whatever it was they had. Those were the times when his Texas-Style manners kicked in, when he felt that maybe a fuck and flee was a tad harsh. Whether it was out of pity, desperation, or genuine affection, Farkle didn't care to find out. He grabbed Lucas's hand again, giving it a gentle squeeze as Lucas nodded. "Of course I'll let you."

Lucas grinned in response, pulling the younger teen into a kiss. "Good. Are you ready for round two?"

Lucas placed open mouthed kisses on Farkle's throat, and he lost himself in the moment. When all was done, only Farkle would lie awake until the sun rose. He would be disgusted with himself for allowing this charade to continue. He would hate that he valued this more than his relationship with Riley. What he hated the most, though, was that he gave Lucas so much of himself, that only a shell was left.

I want you to stay all the time. Not just when you feel guilty.

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Wearing turtlenecks brought a certain comfort to Farkle. It reminded him of simpler times, back when his biggest worry was whether he should take Maya or Riley to the Buggy Awards. They also provided a great way to hide the love bites (Lucas had come up with that term) that decorated his neck. He examined himself in the full body mirror, making sure not even a single strand of hair was out of place. He was sure that the girls, and even Zay, would question why he switched back to the turtleneck geek chic. His outfit would have to be immaculate, the perfect "Throwback Thursday" look. It was a weak excuse, but it would work well enough on his friends.

Strong hands gripped his hips, and Farkle winced-just how many bruises did he get last night?

"Mornin'" Lucas pulled Farkle in, kissing the genius' temple. "I hope I wasn't too rough last night."

"It wasn't anything I couldn't handle." Farkle mumbled, blushing.

"'Course you could." Lucas laughed. "You're cute when you blush." He continued to place kisses along Farkle's jaw, making his way to the younger teens ear lobe. He gently bit down, earning a moan from Farkle.

"We have to go to school, Lucas." Farkle tilted his head up to get a good look at Lucas. "We had plenty of fun last night."

Lucas let out a sigh. "I guess." He released Farkle and made his way to the door, picking up his bag as he passed the threshold. "You coming?" He called from the hallway.

"Yeah, I'll be right there." Farkle released a sigh of his own before gathering his belongings. He trailed behind Lucas as they left the Minkus estate. Briefly, he wondered if he had upset Lucas; rationally speaking, there was no reason for it.

I only said we should get going… He absentmindedly ran his fingers on a railing as he walked. He's so unpredictable. I never know what he's thinking. He glanced at Lucas, and was surprised at how far ahead he was.

"Lucas-" God, he hated how desperate he sounded. Regardless, Lucas stopped for Farkle and turned around. He smiled warmly as Farkle approached. "Can we talk about this?"

"What do you mean?"

"Us, Lucas." Farkle was determined. He wasn't going to drop this: he deserved answers, and damn it, Lucas was gonna deliver.

"What about us?" Lucas appeared genuinely confused, which only furthered Farkle's frustration.

"You can't be-" He was cut off as Lucas took his hands in his own.

"There's nothing to worry about. You know I love you." He brought Farkle's hands to his mouth and placed a kiss on his knuckles. "Really, what's there to talk about?"

The thoughts died in his mind. It appeared that Lucas had won once again. It didn't matter that, when the pair met up with the girls, Lucas embraced Riley and and kissed her. It didn't matter that, once again, Farkle was treated as nothing more than a friend while they were in school. Maya's suspicious glances, Smackle's concerned stare, and Zay's exasperated sighs were ignored-all because Lucas said the words Farkle had never dreamed he would ever hear, least of all from Lucas.

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I hope you enjoyed this. Please leave a review if you liked it. Chapter two will be Lucas, and I'm so excited to write it.