Loving Lily was the biggest mistake I've never regretted. Lily was everything good and pure about this sick, and infested world. Lily...What exactly do you say about the now dead, love of your life? I will never find anyone like Lily Evans. I knew the second I met her. And I knew that I would never love anyone like I loved her, the second I lost her to him. But still, here i sit, fully and completely in love with her 10 years after her death. Here i sit on the anniversary of her death, staring at this headstone, with tears in my eyes. I long for the moment when I die, so that i can see her, look into her emerald green eyes, and hug her. Oh how i long for that moment! It's painful, the hole that she has left in my 's more painful than anything Potter could have ever done to me! God, i miss her with my entire soul…
Seeing her son walk into the great hall at Hogwarts a few months ago, almost matched the pain I'm feeling right now. He's a spitting image of his father, except one small detail, his eyes. He has her eyes and I can't bare to look at him without see her, seeing my Lily.
I turn my attention back to the headstone of my best friend. My mind flashes back to that night. The night I lost her. The night he took her from me. God, if only i could make him pay for this! Lily should have never died! He had no right to take her out of this world! I would give anything to trade places with her. God, if i wasn't such a coward maybe she would still be alive!
"Lily, i'm sorry." I mumble to the headstone. "I'm sorry I failed you."
I try to imagine what she would say to me in this moment, how would she respond? "Now Severus, you and I both know you did everything you could… stop being an idiot!" Lily's voice echoes through my mind as if she were standing right beside me.
The tears begin to well back up in my eyes and I have to brush them away. God, I'm pathetic… I shake my head as one last attempt to compose myself, determined to end this pity fest that i've created for myself.
"I love you, Lily." I mutter again.
I stand, brush off my robes, and with one final glance I begin to walk away. But before I'm out of sight I look back at her grave and I hear her again.
"Take care of my son, Sev." Her voice says, with a hint of a threat. "He's in your hands now."
I continue to walk away with only word coming to my mind, "Always."