I own nothing except the plot.
Told from the point of view from Gaston from Beauty and the Beast.
I'm Perfect (ly Insane)
Why are there no mirrors in insane asylums? I mean I was the most handsome guy around but now I can't even see my face to tell. Of course I'm sure I'm still perfect. All the girls loved me when I wasn't in an insane asylum, except for that do-goodie, Belle. She even tried to ignore me! I mean how could you ignore me with those rippling muscles and that dashing face. Who did she think she was, choosing a book, a book over me? Anyway now hear my story.
All I did was offer her a chance to marry me, to be a perfect little housewife, but she refused. I used to think she preferred people of the same gender, but then she ran away. After that I had no choice but to kidnap her precious father and "gently" persuade him to tell me where she was. All he did was blabber about some beast and a talking candlestick. I got very annoyed and started muttering to my beautiful self about cheese. As you can tell my friends got a bit scared, so I sent them to the show called "land of faeries" where little cows in faerie suits tried to dance. If you want tickets to that show call 1-800-YOU'RE-NUTS. Okay anyway then Belle came back and I of course thought she was coming to beg forgiveness and my wonderfully perfect self was going to give her another chance to become my wife. But no all she did was gush on and on about some beast named, oh this is so original, Beast. I was about ready to go eat m & m's and move to China when she showed us this mirror. It had some picture of an ugly dude and I was wondering how perfect me could be replaced by this hideous thing, so I tried to go kill it. Long story short, I fell off a cliff, the Beast turns into a person, I get sent to an insane asylum, and Belle and the Beast get married living happily ever after. Actually, the last thing I heard Belle was having an affair with the talking candlestick. I've got to go. I have to try to look at myself in the padded walls of my cell. Remember, if any cute girl wants a perfect guy, just look me up in the insane asylum telephone book.
Told from the point of view from Gaston from Beauty and the Beast.
I'm Perfect (ly Insane)
Why are there no mirrors in insane asylums? I mean I was the most handsome guy around but now I can't even see my face to tell. Of course I'm sure I'm still perfect. All the girls loved me when I wasn't in an insane asylum, except for that do-goodie, Belle. She even tried to ignore me! I mean how could you ignore me with those rippling muscles and that dashing face. Who did she think she was, choosing a book, a book over me? Anyway now hear my story.
All I did was offer her a chance to marry me, to be a perfect little housewife, but she refused. I used to think she preferred people of the same gender, but then she ran away. After that I had no choice but to kidnap her precious father and "gently" persuade him to tell me where she was. All he did was blabber about some beast and a talking candlestick. I got very annoyed and started muttering to my beautiful self about cheese. As you can tell my friends got a bit scared, so I sent them to the show called "land of faeries" where little cows in faerie suits tried to dance. If you want tickets to that show call 1-800-YOU'RE-NUTS. Okay anyway then Belle came back and I of course thought she was coming to beg forgiveness and my wonderfully perfect self was going to give her another chance to become my wife. But no all she did was gush on and on about some beast named, oh this is so original, Beast. I was about ready to go eat m & m's and move to China when she showed us this mirror. It had some picture of an ugly dude and I was wondering how perfect me could be replaced by this hideous thing, so I tried to go kill it. Long story short, I fell off a cliff, the Beast turns into a person, I get sent to an insane asylum, and Belle and the Beast get married living happily ever after. Actually, the last thing I heard Belle was having an affair with the talking candlestick. I've got to go. I have to try to look at myself in the padded walls of my cell. Remember, if any cute girl wants a perfect guy, just look me up in the insane asylum telephone book.