A Life Worth Living
by EMPG22HoPe
The sun will stop shining soon
And you'll be gone from my life
Yeah, you'll be gone, it's as simple as a change of heart
Hannah's head felt like it might split open. It was a mistake, of course, consuming all that alcohol in one night. She was surprised to find that she was still alive after so much consumption, among other things that happened last night.
Her long nails tapped the mahogany table as she waited for her coffee. At the time of her ordering a drink, she might have said a couple of expletives without meaning to towards the barista. And it was a shame on her end, too. The barista looked really pretty.
"One dark espresso with zero sugar for Hannah."
She recognized the voice to be the barista she had unfortunately verbally assaulted earlier on.
Hannah removed her shades briefly to look up at the barista. She had flaming scarlet hair, bright blue eyes and an innocent face that could melt even the coldest of hearts. Melt even Hannah's.
"Thanks," Hannah said as the barista placed her mug on the table. "I'm sorry about earlier. I was indisposed and had a rough night, but that doesn't mean I should have taken it out on you."
"It's no trouble at all. You're not the first drunk person that's come in here today." The scarlet-haired girl laughed brightly. "I'm Susan, by the way. Susan Bones."
Hannah regarded her weakly. "I'm Hannah, but you already know that. Hannah Abbott."
"Well, Hannah Abbott," Susan started brightly as she placed her hands on her hips. "As an employee of The Witch's Brew, it's my duty to make your day and see you leave this coffee shop with a smile on your face. You look like you could use company."
There was an air of positivity to Susan as she looked down at her with mirth. If she had been another person, Hannah would have immediately snubbed their company and asked them to leave. But there was something about the girl that was compelling. She was such a bright light in the dreary looking coffee shop.
Perhaps company wouldn't be such a bad idea. It could help to get rid of her blasted hangover.
"By all means," Hannah smiled wearily, offering the seat across her.
Susan removed her apron then rolled it up into a sort of sausage form before taking the seat she offered.
"So tell me, Hannah," Susan leaned forward, placing her elbows on the mahogany table. "How are you?"
Hannah was about to take a sip from her mug when she choked on it at the barista's question. She placed her mug down and looked at Susan. "Well, where do I begin? My boyfriend of five years just broke up with me, my parents are getting a divorce and I just lost my job for losing my shite at my boss."
Susan's eyes widened. "All in one night?"
A smirk graced Hannah's lips as she flipped her blonde hair back. "Would you believe me if I said yes?"
The look on Susan's face softened into worry. "I'm so sorry. I… I probably shouldn't have asked."
"It's fine. You were only being nice." Hannah waved a dismissive hand before taking her mug in her hands. "I thought I'd hit rock bottom, but apparently rock bottom has a basement. That basement, being, that I'm still alive after all that's happened."
"I wouldn't say that," Susan tried to sound upbeat. Then, her features morphed into a hopeful look. "Time heals most wounds, as my mum always says. I understand it might take you a while to adjust to all that's happened, but I know one day, things will turn around for you."
Hannah offered her a tired smile. "I wish that were true. Everything just feels… temporary, you know? I thought Neville and I would get married at some point, but that ended in a flash. I thought my parents would stay married long, but that turned out to be a disaster. And my job? I've only been in it for three years, but I knew it wasn't going to last much long either."
"Nothing's permanent." Susan said fondly.
"Would it be naïve to hope for something permanent? To find myself still searching for it?" Hannah asked, looking down at her drink. "I'm always looking beyond the years, but the people around me don't seem to."
Susan smiled in understanding. "I suppose it isn't. But I think it's the temporary that helps us treasure something we have. Permanence guarantees a lifetime with no blemishes, but people often take it for granted. Knowing that they had something to lose… that they could lose that something… makes them cherish it for long."
A small silence descended upon them. Hannah blinked at Susan, who still looked ever more hopeful. She never saw life in that way because she was always searching for the permanent. But perhaps in the long run for looking into the permanent, she didn't know a good thing until it was pretty much gone.
She leaned back and stared at Susan now, her lips curling into a slight grin. "I suppose you're right."
Susan beamed at her. "Of course, there's nothing wrong with finding the permanent if that's what you truly wish to do. But you have to look forward then back if you still wish to pursue it. You can't move on if you're still in the past."
Hannah bobbed her head in agreement, lifting her mug to her lips as she considered Susan's words.
"You know… there's a firework display at the beach just a couple of minutes away from here tonight…" Susan trailed off, blue eyes gleaming with delight. "Perhaps you'd want to come and watch? Something to keep your mind off of the events of last night."
"Susan Bones, the pretty barista, are you asking me out on a date?" Hannah asked teasingly.
She found that Susan looking all red and worked up made her adorable in the most heart-wrenching way.
"Oh, well, I suppose I am!" Susan said bravely this time, her cheeks still the color of tomatoes. "Only if you want to."
Hannah grinned, her first real smile since last night. "I'll be there."
The fireworks illuminated the night sky as it flashed in multiple colors. They took form in many different shapes: hearts, smiley faces, and one even looked like the leaves of a palm tree.
Hannah delighted in the marvelous view as she sat on the sand next to Susan, who was still looking up at the bright fireworks. She found that she adored Susan's delight and laughter every time a firework takes a particular shape. The scarlet-haired girl would tug on her shirt and ask her to look up, but most of the time of the display, she had eyes for nothing but Susan.
"I could kiss you." Hannah declared in the midst of her joy seeing Susan's delight.
Susan's attention finally turned to her, blue eyes wide in surprise. The fireworks did little to hide the blush on her cheeks. Suddenly, Hannah felt her own cheeks redden at her sudden declaration.
"I could. I mean, I'd like to." Hannah wanted to say it was a joke, but ended up stumbling on her own heart's confessions. "I–may I? We may? I mean, may we? Wait, what?"
A bright laugh escaped Susan's lips before she scooted closer to Hannah. Her proximity made Hannah's heart race. She was certain the girl would run the other way after what she just blurted out. But to her surprise, and she had not been prepared for the best of it, Susan captured her lips in hers.
Hannah leaned into the kiss to deepen it, and she was certain—just almost certain, that she might have found that something permanent after all.
When Hannah went back to the coffee shop the next day, she was disappointed to find that Susan wasn't on duty.
A barista passed by after having just delivered an order to one of the tables.
"Excuse me?" Hannah asked, causing the barista to stop in his tracks to look at her.
"Can I help you?" The barista beamed at her. Her name tag read Cho.
"Hi, Cho! Is Susan not here today?" She inquired.
Cho's face slackened, as though a dark cloud had passed through and ruined everything for her. "Didn't you hear?"
Hannah shook her head. "Hear what?"
"Susan passed away last night." Cho replied delicately as she fidgeted with her apron.
The world felt like it was crumbling around her. Her head spun all of a sudden, far worse than any hangover could have ever produced. She wanted to sink into the depths of the earth, if only to block out the truth.
Her voice wavered as she watched Cho draw tears. "How?"
"She had leukemia. It was so sudden. She's only been in her second stage, and she'd been doing so well." Cho's voice cracked as she wiped her tears away with the back of her hand. "We told her not to go back to work, but she said something about not living life to the fullest. It was so dangerous for her and…"
Hannah took a step back, feeling her own tears come. "She didn't tell me."
"I suppose she wanted to save you the trouble." Cho breathed out heavily before she looked up at her. "Are you… do you happen to be Hannah Abbott?"
"Y-yes…" Hannah's voice quivered.
Cho nodded before she rummaged through her pocket, soon producing a white envelope with her name on it in perfect cursive. "Susan's parents found this in her room when they… when they discovered that she's…"
Hannah didn't want to hear much of it anymore. She sniffed as she took the letter from Cho.
"I think you meant a great deal to her." Cho said as she attempted to compose herself. "The letter's unopened. Her parents thought it'd be best to give it to you."
There were still so many questions that ran in her mind, but before she could ask more, Cho had already left to go behind the counter.
Hannah opened the letter.
Dear Hannah,
Words cannot express the joy you have given me in this lifetime. My life, I've always known, is short-lived. Temporary, as we've talked about yesterday. I don't know when I will leave this earth. It could be today after I write this letter, tomorrow after I see you again, or many years later when I would have wished for us to be together. But regardless of how short-lived my life might be, I just wanted you to know that you could have been the permanence in my life.
You were right about the search for something permanent. All I've ever saw life in was the temporary, as I have thought my life to be. But after meeting you, knowing you, and even loving you, as quick as it may sound, I have learned that perhaps finding something permanent wouldn't be so bad. That finding my permanence—you—would make life worth living.
No matter what happens in our days to come, I want you to know that I would give you everything you have wanted, give you the permanence in life that nobody bothered to. You are the light that has told me that I have a life worth living. And I am forever grateful that I have met you in this world full of dark.
All my love,
Susan Bones, the pretty barista
Susan Bones's funeral was perhaps the greatest permanence she thought she would have that has shattered her. Forget how her parents were going to be separated, or how Neville left her, or how she's lost the job of her dreams. Nothing hurt more than losing someone she had considered a life with.
But despite her gloomy mood, Susan's funeral was nothing short of bright. Susan had requested that everyone wear brightly colored apparel, for she didn't want them to make her funeral like any other. She wanted them to give her flowers with all the colors in the rainbow. The event was so lively colored, it was almost impossible to decipher it as a funeral, and yet here they were.
When it was Hannah's turn to place a flower on Susan's casket, Hannah brought with her brightly colored sunflowers. She placed them on the closed casket, and then felt a soft breeze in the summer morning.
Hannah looked up at the sky. She found that the sun hid behind the clouds, but the brightly lit expanse of blue and white gave her a sort of comfort. A comfort that made her feel that Susan was looking down on her.
For the first time in that supposed dreary day, Hannah smiled. She had been looking so hard for the permanent in life, when really; all she was really looking for was something or someone that could make life worth living.
And although Susan was gone, she believes she's already found that something worth living in the girl with the scarlet hair.
Prompt(s):
Fanfiction Writing Month: 2,174 words
Dragon Breeding Club: Peruvian Vipertooth - Marcus
Eastern Hogwarts FunFair: Ferris Wheel - 6: (pairing) susan/hannah
Southern Hogwarts FunFair: Hedge Maze - Southern Corner: (plot point) a death
Northern Hogwarts FunFair: Tunnel of Love: Pirate Ship #15 - coffeshop!AU
Insane House Challenge
110. Pairing - Hannah/Susan
365 Prompts Challenge
328. Trope - Coffee Shop
Writing Club
"I could kiss you. I could. I mean, I'd like to. I–may I? We may? I mean, may we? Wait, what?" (Disney Challenge: Quotes)
2. Take What You Get - (dialogue) "You can't move on if you're still in the past." (Showtime)
5. Hannah Abbott (Count Your Buttons: Characters)
[Summer] Seasonal Challenges
World Gin Day: Write about a morning after. (Days of the Year)
Mahogany (Colour Prompts)
Alexandrite - (dialogue) "I thought I'd hit rock bottom, but apparently rock bottom has a basement." (Birthstones)
Black-Eyed Susan - (character) Susan Bones (Flowers)
(colour) Scarlet (Gryffindor Themed Prompts: Other Prompts)
34. Oliver! - alt. write about the search for something permanent (Shay's Musical Challenge)
Delta Aquarids Meteor Shower - (scenario) Watching fireworks (Summer Astronomy Prompts)
AN: Thank you so much for reading! Please R&R. :')
EMPG22HoPe