She Ain't Messin' With No Broke
Insert Standard Disclaimer … Here
Setting: Season 1, during "William, Tell" when Karen goes to Will for advice. Will's first and last lines here are his last and first lines in the two restaurant scenes in the episode. This conversation fits in between those two scenes.
"Well," Will began, leaning forward on the table earnestly, "I'm no expert, but the key relationships in my life are based on communication and trust."
Karen didn't look up or acknowledge him for a long moment, seemingly lost in her own thoughts. She fingered her napkin nervously, keeping her eyes focused in her coffee cup. "We have a pre-nup," she suddenly announced quietly.
"What?"
"You heard me," Karen snapped, voice back to regular volume and Will flinched.
She was right; he had heard her.
Will watched Karen as she finished stirring her coffee and deliberately set the spoon down on the saucer. "You know, just F.Y.I. If it helps in whatever lawyering you'd have to do," Karen continued, waving a flippant hand in his general direction. Will continued watching her in silence before she finally looked up and met his gaze. Her hazel eyes bored into his own, telling him things her words neglected to add.
And he suddenly realized why she told him that.
Will cleared his throat and sat forward slightly on his chair. "Karen, you know that when we joke about how you're a gold-digger and only married Stan for his money, that – that's just jokes, right? You realize we're just kidding. I – I'm sorry if we ever hurt your feelings."
Karen laughed richly. "Wilma. You know I don't have feelings."
"Yeah," Will proceeded cautiously, "but, hypothetically, if you did, we'd have nudged them a little bit, right?"
Karen lowered her eyes to her coffee again before answering. "Maybe." Karen took a sip and sat the cup slowly back onto the table before looking up and addressing Will seriously. "You know, if I go through with this, I'm not going to get a damn thing out of Stanley. He keeps his kids and all his money and I'm back where I started. I didn't even hesitate to sign this thing before the wedding." She paused and looked off into a random corner of the restaurant before scoffing at herself. "Idiot."
"No, you're not," Will said softly. "Because that's not why you married him."
Karen turned and studied Will, astonished that this man could see through her walls and even more astonished at herself for letting him. She watched him for a moment, a sincere smile gracing his face, and decided to risk letting him have another glimpse inside the fortress. "The only way I'd get anything is if he did something to make the pre-nup invalid."
She paused as Will's brow furrowed. "There's some sort of clause…?"
"The fidelity clause," Karen clarified curtly.
Will was taken aback for a brief moment before reaching across the table. He laid his hand on top of hers and Karen eyed it suspiciously. He smiled. "Well, then in that case I hope you never win any of his money."
After a moment, Karen effortlessly returned his smile, relieved that someone finally understood. "Me too, honey."
Will gave her hand a quick squeeze before folding his hands in front of him and leaning forward on the table. "Seems to me, in spite of everything, you're still in love with your husband."
He took a sip of his coffee as Karen relaxed and sat back in her chair, walls reconstructed, babbling about Leona Helmsley while drawing forced and odd comparisons between them. Will chuckled at her monologue, glad that he was there to listen to her talk this out, no matter how little actual help he had been, finding that he understood Grace's unusual assistant just a little bit better.
Author's Note: Inspired by the passing mention of the pre-nup in Season 5's "May Divorce Be With You." Because, really, she wouldn't be a gold-digger if she signed the 'nup. Let's think about that one, kids. And I've ditched Shakespeare. Kanye West is now giving me story titles. Don't hate.