Disclaimer: I do not own anything of Scryed
Warning: There's an age gap between Kazuma and Kanami. Although this is some years after the anime, so the gap isn't that big of a deal.
Also, this story may offend people to those who don't like KazumaKanami, premarital sex, or are appalled to see the Twelve Days of Christmas' lyrics being used in such a horrible way. So if you're one of those people, make sure to stop reading right now. For the most part this is made to make you laugh, so try and keep an open mind if you choose to continue reading this.
Twelve Days of Kazu-kun
On the first day of Christmas Kazu-kun gave to me….a long kiss before leaving
On the second day of Christmas Kazu-kun gave to me…two bags of rice
And a long kiss before leaving
On the third day of Christmas Kazu-kun gave to me…three chicken legs
Two bags of rice
And a long kiss before leaving
On the fourth day of Christmas Kazu-kun gave to me…four Women's Lifestyle magazines
Three chicken legs
Two bags of rice
And a long kiss before leaving
On the fifth day of Christmas Kazu-kun gave to me…five golden rings
Four Women's Lifestyle magazines
Three chicken legs
Two bags of rice
And a long kiss before leaving
On the sixth day of Christmas Kazu-kun gave to me…six baby kittens
Five plastic rings
Four Lifestyle magazines
Three chicken leg bones
Two half-bags of rice
And a longer kiss before leaving
On the seventh day of Christmas Kazu-kun gave to me…seven bathing suits
Six baby kittens
Five plastic rings
Four Lifestyle magazines
Three chicken leg bones
Two half-bags of rice
And a longer kiss before leaving
On the eight day of Christmas Kazu-kun gave to me…eight cows to milk
Seven bathing suits
Six baby kittens
Five plastic rings
Four Lifestyle magazines
Three chicken leg bones
Two half-bags of rice
And a longer kiss before leaving
On the ninth day of Christmas Kazu-kun gave to me…nine bottles of perfume
Eight cows to milk
Seven bathing suits
Six baby kittens
Five plastic rings
Four Lifestyle magazines
Three chicken leg bones
Two half-bags of rice
And a longer kiss before leaving
On the tenth day of Christmas Kazu-kun gave to me…ten sexy poses
Nine bottles of perfume
Eight cows to milk
Seven bathing suits
Six baby kittens
Five plastic rings
Four Lifestyle magazines
Three chicken leg bones
Two half-bags of rice
And a longer kiss before leaving
On the eleventh day of Christmas Kazu-kun gave to me…eleven sets of vegetables
Ten sexy poses
Nine bottles of perfume
Eight cows to milk
Seven bathing suits
Six baby kittens
Five plastic rings
Four Lifestyle magazines
Three chicken leg bones
Two half-bags of rice
And a longer kiss before leaving
On the twelfth day of Christmas Kazu-kun gave to me…twelve hours of waiting before proposing
Eleven sets of vegetables
Ten sexy poses
Nine bottles of perfume
Eight cows to milk
Seven bathing suits
Six baby kittens
Five plastic rings
Four Lifestyle magazines
Three chicken leg bones
Two half-bags of rice
And the longest kiss before staying the night
On the day after Christmas Kazu-kun made me into…a woman through premarital sex
Author's Note: Seasons greetings and I hope you enjoyed reading the song fic!