based on a prompt for my tumblr
misssnakeyboots asked you:
Harry gets stuck in the doorway because he is morbidly obese but Draco butters him up and frees him
(okay I treated this plot like when Bobby died in Dallas – and I seriously hope I'm not the only one old enough to understand that reference)
Draco jolted awake and ran frantic eyes around the bedroom. He was alone in a big cold bed.
„Harry?" He shouted as he stood from the bed.
„In the kitchen, Draco. I'm having a breakfast." Sounded Harry's mumbled answer.
„Oh Merlin! Don't eat! Immediately stop eating!" Draco grabbed and hastily put on his pyjama bottoms and Harry's t-shirt from the floor and Apparated to the kitchen where Harry sat with wide eyes and piece of buttered toast frozen half way to his mouth.
„Oh, thank Merlin, you are not fat," he breathed out before collapsing on his usual chair at the table.
Harry put down the toast and gave Draco confused onceover. „Are you feeling okay? I didn't think you had so much to drink last night but if you are still drunk maybe you should go back to bed." Draco gave him a glare.
„What? If you are not drunk I cannot understand how you could have thought I'll get fat in the thirty minutes since I've woken up."
„It was a dream – don't laugh" he added when he saw Harry's expression. „Very vivid dream no doubt fuelled by last night's gluttony."
„Well, it's Christmas" said Harry with fond smile. „But nevermind, tell me what the dream was about."
Draco closed his eyes and with a great shudder he began to talk.
„We had exactly the same Christmas party we had last night. Same people, same food, same games... But one thing was very different," he looked at Harry. „You. You were so fat! And I mean like really fat, like terribly morbidly obese and Ron dared you to walk through the door to another room instead of Apparating and you got stuck and we couldn't move you any way so I had to butter your sides and then we were able to push you through." Draco looked so creeped out at the end that Harry couldn't help but laugh and added: „Yeah, sounds like something Ron would do." At this even Draco snorted.
„Please, just promise me that you'll never get fat. You are allowed pouch and slight second chin as we get older but nothing else."
„I promise" smiled Harry, but laughed second later: „But Merlin, you are shallow."
Draco looked at him with a ghost of his schooldays sneer. „I don't know if you would want a boyfriend sized as four Slughorns." And went to pour himself a cup of tea. As he took his first sip, he felt strong hands curl around his middle and Harry's breath tickled his ear when he whispered: „You are right of course. And I seem to recall certain activity which burns lot of calories. Care to join me? You know, to keep me in shape."
Draco put the cup on the table and smirked at Harry.
„I like the way you think, Potter."