This was written in response to a writing challenge on another site. We had to write a story about Fear.
ENJOY!
Warning: it's a bit of a weepy!
Well I wouldn't say I was frightened, as such. It's just that in our line of work it's something we have to think about and it never was more evident than it had been the past few months.
Watching him lying there, well then, I'd never been so scared. Oh we've both had our share of time in the hospital, but this time………well let's just say, I didn't think we'd make it through.
I made it my mission then to find the man responsible for my partner not being able to work anymore. And I did. I found him, but through all that time I was so scared, scared that he'd not be alive when I made it back from where ever it was I was searching.
I was scared he wouldn't know me when I got back, afraid that the damage was so great that all I could do was watch him as he fought against disability, but it didn't turn out that way.
He can't work, so I care for him. But he doesn't fight against it, he embraces it, just like he does everything in his life. Always taking the good with the bad as long as we're together, he'll tell you, nothing else matters. The rest is just gravy.
So I started by saying that I wasn't really frightened and maybe I'm not, not of losing him anyway, but now I'm frightened that I wont be able to be around him all the time. I'm frightened that I might give up before he does, you see we're both getting old now. Too old to work the streets anymore but more than that, I have a heart condition. I haven't told him. What's the point? He'll only worry and I'm worrying enough for both of us right now. I'm keeping it to myself. Oh Huggy knows but he's sworn to secrecy too. So partner it seems that maybe I'm going to bail out before you do.
And that is what I'm most afraid of………leaving you.
"Me and thee" and it always will be.