Sometimes the truth isn't good enough. Sometimes people deserve more. Sometimes people deserve to have their faith rewarded.
The Dark Knight
You spend your whole life chasing after something, never letting it leave your sight.
Then it's gone.
And with it, your purpose to live.
x
"Is anyone sitting here?" The girl asked, lips drawn in a nervous smile. She was small, very small. Her head would reach his elbow if he was standing.
He thought about it. Jordon and the guys wouldn't mind if she sat at their table. As long as she didn't talk their ears off. He considered her auburn hair, placed in two long braids. Freckles spotted her pale skin. The green hue of her eyes seemed to change when the light reflected on it. He cracked a grin. "Nah, it's fine. Go ahead."
She released a breath; it sounded like relief. Sliding onto the bench across from him, she ate gingerly. "What's your name?" He asked her, trying to make conversation till his friends arrived.
"Oh!" She flushed. "Sorry. My name is Clarissa." She shrugged absentmindedly. "You can call me Clary, if you want."
He nodded. "Jace."
Clary sipped some of her milk. "It's nice to meet you. Thanks for letting me sit here." She glanced around the booming cafeteria. "I probably would've eaten in the bathroom otherwise."
He raised an eyebrow delicately, stabbing his fork into his chicken. "Really? That seems harsh."
She giggled. "Yeah, well, I have a history for harsh treatment."
He wanted to inquire more about that, but before he could, Jordon arrived. He was followed by Raphael and Bat. At the sight of a new girl at their usual table, they hustled over, buzzing with interest.
He shook his head in amusement and watched as Clary tried to shut down their playful advancements.
x
He came home late. About one in the morning.
She sat on the couch, picking at the fabric of her pajamas. When the door swung open, she whirled backwards hastily, a smile spreading on her face.
He didn't see her. He was untucking his shirt, launching his tie on the kitchen counter. "Jace?" She called out to him, hesitant.
He didn't turn around.
All he replied with was, "I'm tired."
Then he went to their bedroom and never came out.
x
"Oh my gosh!" She started, her voice high pitched. "My economics book, I forgot it in your car." They were walking upstairs to their third hour and had a minute before the bell would ring.
He threw his head back with a groan. "How many times have we went over this?"
She cringed slightly at his accusatory tone. "I know, I know. I'm sorry." She met his tawny eyes. "Please. You know Mr. Garroway won't let me in if I don't have it."
He stared at her for a few moments. She was pouting without realizing it, her full lips pink and shining with gloss. "Whatever. You're stayin' with me for detention, though."
She grinned broadly, clutching her binder tightly. "Thanks! I will."
Then he went back to his car and she went to class.
x
The next morning, she awoke to find him gone. No longer on his side of the bed. With eyebrows knitted, she padded to the living room and was glad to find him watching television. "Good morning." She greeted, bending down to kiss him on the cheek.
"Morning." He grunted, flicking through some channels.
"Did you sleep well?" She asked, searching for a pan in the kitchen. She dug inside a cabinet and found one, pulling it over to the stove.
He shrugged, sighing. "I guess."
She sent him a worried expression. "Do you wanna talk about it?" The eggs were sizzling in the background, making the air smell pleasant and sending her stomach waves of hunger.
"No."
She sucked in a breath and nodded to herself. "Okay."
x
"You haven't had your first kiss?!" Jordon shrieked like a girl, pushing himself up from the backseat to stare at her incredulously.
Her cheeks were the color of ripe tomatoes. "Who cares? It's not a big deal."
Raphael, who was too busy playing some fortnite on his phone, managed to retort helpfully, "It is a big deal, my lady friend."
She shook her head and stared out the passenger window. That didn't stop Jordon from saying, "I'll save you the trouble, Clary." She turned to him in confusion and he continued, oblivious. "Maia will let this slide, I think."
"What are you talking about?" She asked, looking to Jace for an answer. He shrugged, releasing a laugh.
Jordon cleared his throat and announced, as if he were performing a speech, "I'll kiss you. Then you won't have to live in misery your entire life."
"What?! No way, J." She scowled, waving her arms around defensively.
"Look," Jordon reasoned, "Once a person realizes that you're a seventeen year old girl who hasn't gotten her first kiss..." He faltered, the volume of his voice dropping. "I don't even know. The horrible possibilities are endless."
Jace stopped at a red light and turned to the back momentarily, "Dude. You're so fucked up."
Jordon howled and smacked Raphael in the process. "I'm looking out for our chick, man." He reached out to poke her head. "Come on, Clary. A life of torture or a kiss."
Raphael shoved his phone in his pocket. He joined the conversation, "What's your deal with kissing Clary?"
Jordon sighed, loud and dramatic. He muttered something they couldn't decipher.
"Say what?" Raphael demanded, leaning in to hear him.
Jordon huffed. "It'll be the first time I kiss a red-head."
The car blew up with insults, laughs, and screams.
x
"I don't know." Clary replied to her friend, swirling her straw in her coffee.
Isabelle rolled her eyes and leaned against the office refrigerator. "And what's the reason this time?"
"I wanna stay home with Jace." Clary placed her cup on the counter and cracked her knuckles, the pops relaxing her muscles.
"What are you talking about?" Isabelle asked, pushing herself toward her. "Jace'll be out on a business trip."
Clary frowned. "What? Since when?"
"Since Alec and him signed a deal with some other firm." She stared at her like she was stupid.
"But he didn't tell me..."
Isabelle grabbed her hand, swinging it in the air. "Chill, Clary. He probably forgot. He's an idiot sometimes, y'know?"
Clary swallowed.
He never told her anything these days.
x
"You dropped Clary off at a party and left?" Jace spat out, the hair on his head shaking. Jordon backed away a step and glared at the anger in his friend's words.
They were outside Jace's house, near the parking lane. It was around nine p.m. and the sky was dark, crickets singing their customary melodies.
"Dude. It's a party. Stop freaking out." Jordon replied. "She's probably hanging out with her friends or whatever."
Jace fisted his hands and trudged to his car. "Where are you going?" Jordon called, sounding exasperated.
"Fixing the fucking mistake you just made." And he drove off.
x
The party was bigger than he had thought. There were students from so many different schools, it was difficult for him to target anyone he knew. He pushed passed a kissing couple and checked a bathroom. It was empty. Music pumped through the house, making his feet feel as if they were vibrating. He opened the door to a bedroom and heard the groans of a few guys. "Shit." He cursed.
He couldn't text her. She never read her messages.
"Hey. Aren't you the football player from-" He shrugged the girl away and dodged some dancing arms in the hall.
She couldn't be with these groups. She had to be somewhere quiet. He narrowed his eyes, thinking.
The roof.
He climbed a flight of stairs and kept going until he reached the top floor. Then he found another bedroom, this time small and without any guests. The window inside was wide open. He grinned.
x
"Clary?" He asked, seeing her small figure sitting in a crouched position.
She turned around, her hair whipping in the light breeze. "Jace!" She shouted over the music. He carefully walked towards her.
"You doing alright?" He asked when he was sitting beside her, her shoulder touching his side.
She shivered slightly and wrapped her arms across her chest. "Better now."
Jace gritted his teeth. "I'll beat the shit out of Jordon. I told him to come with you."
Clary laughed. "No, don't. How could he have known?" She bit her bottom lip. "It's okay. No biggie."
He sighed and rose up, holding his palm out for her.
She didn't waver to take it.
x
She thought he would come home by dinner. She thought he'd arrive to be surprised, taking in the scene she had created. Instead, it was midnight and she was sitting at an empty dinner table, the wax of candles gleaming in the low light.
Her eyelids were starting to droop. She stood up and gathered the glass plates, placing them on a single stack. The meatloaf was cold and the wine untouched. She gripped the sink tightly.
She wouldn't head to bed until he came.
And then they would speak to each other.
x
"Busy working?" She asked when he entered their apartment room.
He didn't respond, only placed his coat on the rack.
"Where were you?" She asked again, inching closer to him.
He didn't answer.
She grabbed his arm and pulled him roughly to face her. He did, his face emotionless. "I'm talking to you. Why the fuck are you ignoring me?" She knew she sounded desperate and afraid, but she didn't care. She needed to hear his voice.
He gently removed his arm from her grasp and walked into the bathroom.
She crumbled to the carpet.
x
They didn't speak for a week after that.
He slept on the couch.
She slept on their bed.
x
She talked to Isabelle.
And Isabelle promised, determined, "We'll figure this out."
x
Sometimes, he didn't even come home.
He didn't bother.
x
"When did it start?" He asked, tilting his head to the side.
She rubbed circles on his chest, comforting him and nearly lulling him to sleep. "Awhile ago. Can't really pinpoint a time."
He took a curl of her hair. "Talk to me about it."
She cleared her throat. "Okay, Jace." Her mouth quirked at the corner. "Time to get into the real stuff." He could feel her heart. Pumping like the pounding of a horse's hooves.
"My mom was a dancer. A professional actually. She got awards and trophies and all kinds of stuff. Like, she was famous. And then my father left her. My mom was pregnant with me at the time. His name, I think it was Valentine. Yeah, that's his name. I don't know why he left either. My mom turned to stripping. She wasn't getting any gigs or shows for her professional dancing. She needed the money to pay for when I would come into the world." Clary smiled. "My mom, she's amazing. What I'm gonna tell you now..." She released a breath. "It'll make her sound bad. But she's good."
He pressed his lips against her knuckles, rubbing them on her skin. "She got a boyfriend. He was pretty nice. Bought me stuff and everything. Barbies and other dolls. She didn't marry him, but he stayed in our lives for a long time."
Clary ran her fingers through his hair. He shut his eyes, listening. "When I was fourteen, he raped me." She didn't cry. She didn't shed a tear.
"What?" He sat up briskly, wondering if this was a joke.
"Yea." She nodded to him, letting him know she wasn't lying. "Give me credit, I was a dumb kid. Maybe I deserved it."
"No, no." He took her face in his hands. "Don't fucking say that. If you even think that, I won't ever talk to you again." She stifled a strangled sound, the color coming back to her cheeks.
"You beautiful angel." He murmured, breathing in her scent.
x
A month after she had tried to confront him, Isabelle had texted her an address.
She left work early and drove down to the house, not knowing what she'd see, but hoping for answers.
x
She didn't remember the details.
Just the fact that when she knocked the door a woman her age answered. With Jace.
x
And she knew it was over.
Just as they had begun, their story had concluded.
"Oh, baby." Isabelle whispered, stroking her back as she cried. "Love's a cruel joke."
x
She loved him. Too much to put into words. Too much to tell Isabelle. Too much to describe to her therapist. Too much to explain to her brother.
x
Even though he was her brother, Isabelle cut Jace off completely.
Nothing connected them anymore. Just lost memories.
x
When she was packing her clothes into a suitcase, she heard footsteps behind her. She already knew it was him. Isabelle had already advised him to keep away from her, or else she'd call the cops. He never listened. He was always stubborn.
She folded a pair of her jeans. Without turning, she asked, "Why did you do it?"
For once, he responded. "Because I'm not who you think I am."
She sniffled, zipped the piece of luggage with finality. "Then who are you?"
His voice was raw. "My father's son."
x
He helped with her boxes. Lifted them into a truck she had rented.
When everything was set and organized, they stood across one another. She could finally peer at him, without interruption. His hair was long, stretching into his eyes. From the sun's rays, his orbs were a rich orange. She would never see him again. He was just going to be an obstacle she had to pass.
Clary shook her ponytail back. "Thank you." She licked her lips. "Good luck with whatever you do."
He leaned closer to her and she flinched. He frowned, moving back. "You had to have known."
"Known what?"
He said it tenderly, like they had both kept a secret for a long time. "We weren't gonna last, Clary." He nodded his head at her and tucked his hands into his jacket pockets. "You're an angel. Don't let anyone forget it."
x
"You cheated on her. With a girl you didn't even know." Alec said, staring at him with venomous eyes.
Jace shrugged. "She can't be with me."
His friend laughed bitterly. "There you go again. Playing the pitiful bastard."
"No." Jace placed his face in his hands, his words muffled. "I'm a fucking idiot, but I know what I'm worth."
His brother asked, "What are you worth?"
"Nothing but shit."
x
"What happens after high school?" She mumbled.
"What do you mean?"
She rose a little on the bed with the help of her elbows. "I mean, what happens to us?"
Jace's breath stirred her hair. His skin was hot on hers. "Whatever happens, happens."
Her face fell. "What is that supposed to mean?"
He pecked her on the forehead. "It means that even if we're not together, you'll always know that I love you."
She smiled, cheeky. "Really? Always is a long time."
"It doesn't matter what happens." The gold in his eyes grew darker. "We had our fun and maybe the universe is telling us that we're too great of a couple to stay that way."
He nudged his nose with hers. "Okay?"
She nodded. "I'm with you."
x
While she didn't know it, he'd only live till the age of twenty six, three years after they separated. He never married again.
She fell in love with someone else. Then, she fell out of love. And even though she tried to find someone who could complete her, the universe seemed to scream otherwise. In the end, she remained alone.
x
"Oh, no! Don't!" She cried, giggling uncontrollably. She shifted away from him and he simply dragged her small body to his.
"So, you are ticklish?" He asked, his fingers finding her skin. She squirmed, her cheeks pink and her eyes shut.
"Please, stop." She breathed out, pushing his hands away.
He did stop.
She tried to arrange her hair back to normal and he watched her with distinct amusement. "Are you mad at me?" He asked.
"Never."
x
[a/n]: So yeah. That's it. Hope you guys liked it, especially Jujubean23. This one's for you. If anybody's got requests, PM me. As for the cheating part in the one-shot, I didn't dwell on it too much. When you get cheated on, everything is a blur. Oftentimes, the girl is forgotten and all you can really remember is your significant other. Sometimes, you don't find love in this life. And sometimes, you do.
Happy Thanksgiving to all of you. May you celebrate with friends and family. I am thankful for all of you. I hope, with all my heart, that you find love. And I hope you are happy.
Review.