Title:- Feels like home

Couple:- Carter/Abby

Rating:- PG13/T+

Author:- Lu

Summary:- May challenge fic for OCOH. Song title must be used in conversation. This is an AU fic for the time Abby is studying for her exams and Carter agrees to help her study. Kem never happened. My song in Feels like Home by Chantal Kreviazuk.

As Carter entered the lounge he heard the groan from behind the pile of medical journals on the table. He stifled a giggle, how often when he had been studying had he done the exact same thing? He wondered who was sitting behind the books, it could have been anyone of a number of people, but it had sounded like one person he knew very well. His ex-girlfriend Abby. He peered over the books and saw her sitting with on hand in her hair, the other twiddling the pen in her hand. She was so beautiful, but why had he broken up with her?

"You all right?" He asked her.

She looked up from where she sat and into those deep chocolate eyes. She could almost feel herself falling for him all over again. She quickly shook that feeling from her head. He had broken it off with her. She still couldn't believe it sometimes. They had been so perfect together and now look at them. Barely speaking to one another.

"Just having a little trouble with cardiomyopothy." She sighed. "Silly really, I know it backwards but I just can't get the information to stay in my head."

"Do you want help studying? I have some of my books here, we could go grab a coffee or something and I could help you out." He asked, hoping she would say yes. He really wanted to talk to her. He hadn't given her a fair chance to talk after he broke it off so quickly. He had been in a bad place at the time and it seemed like the best thing to do. Now he regretted it something awful.

"If you have the time." She answered, beginning to pack up her books. "Do you mind if we go back to mine though. I seem to study a little better there."

"Not a problem, if that's all right with you." He said helping her place the books into the bag she had placed on the table beside her. He watched as she stood, God, she really was gorgeous. The white coat she wore over her jeans and shirt seemed to accentuate her blonde hair and brown eyes. She seemed almost angel like.

The walk to the EL station was done in silence. It was hard to think of topics that they could both talk of now, but sitting on the train together Abby decided to start a conversation. "So how's everyone been since Gamma passed?" It had been a while, and also the beginning of the end for them.

"So-so. The staff seems lost without her. I know I am. I keep expecting her to be sitting in the same chair she always sat in when I went to visit. Dad has been staying in the mansion since. He's been working for the foundation here, instead of travelling like he always has. He says it's nice to be in one place for a change."

"I bet. You said you were lost without her, how are you dealing with it?" She asked, knowing that he could slip back into his addiction or into another so easily.

"I'm actually doing really well. The first few weeks after she past were the hardest, but then that was when I pushed you away. I felt really bad then, but I didn't slip into anything. I even attended meetings. I though that if I went to them then I wouldn't have the thought to do it."

Abby almost beamed when he told her that. "John I am so proud of you. That was such a great thing to do."

He was so shocked by her response he didn't really have a comeback for it. He felt like they were back in their old routine, as if they had never been apart. Luckily they had reached their station and disembarked the train before walking towards Abby's apartment. An apartment they had shared until he had called it off.

The apartment was warm and homey, John remembered and he wasn't disappointed. She hadn't changed a thing about it. Still the same throw lay across the back of the sofa. The same magazine's, though newer editions, were on the coffee table. The only thing different was the smell. The apartment no longer smelt of stale cigarette smoke. He had forgotten she had given up when she went back to school. He was proud of her, it was the one vice he thought she would never give up.

"Take a seat and I'll make some coffee." Abby said as she discarded her jacket onto the coat rack. He followed suit and took his old seat on the sofa. His mind wandered, remembering the times they had spent on the sofa. How often had they made love in the small hours of the morning and then fallen asleep under the throw. Nights spent with her wrapped in his arms as they watched movies. Movies that made them laugh and movies that made them cry, it didn't matter what kind they were as long as they were together watching them. "Here you go." She said breaking him from his daydream.

He took the scalding hot cup from her hand and felt the surge of electricity that soared through them as their fingers brushed against one another. "Thanks."

After sitting drinking their coffee, Carter decided to start with they studying, he needed a distraction from thinking of her. They way her hair swung as she walked, they way she bit on her bottom lip when she was thinking of things to say. And they were lips that he wanted to kiss again, why had he broken up with her?

Abby put music on in the background, she always liked to have something on as she studied. It was strange how she felt having Carter in the house again. It felt so natural. Even if they weren't at ease. It was something that they could be in the same room as one another. At work, it had been a veritable nightmare for everyone else in the department. They only spoke to one another if they had too and even at that they weren't very civil. Kerry had threatened them both on several occasions that they would be disciplined and work on different shifts if they couldn't be nice to one another. Carter had though about it but realised as much as it was hard to see her, he couldn't work without her.

So the studying started. Carter opened his books, pulling up the latest figures he had on the stuff Abby needed. Every time he brushed past her he could feel the warmth of her skin. It was intoxicating. Her smell, her warmth, how could he ever live without it. He wanted her back so much, but he didn't know how to broach the subject.

Abby watched as Carter worked around her. His eyes she was drowning in, his smile was making her want him. How could he make her like that by just sitting beside him. He was intoxicating, filling her head with feelings she thought she had lost for him. She knew that she would have to do something about it. She just couldn't sit any longer knowing how she felt. She just wasn't sure how to broach the subject.

Carter watched as she pulled her bottom lip into her mouth. She was thinking hard about something. He hoped it was him, even if that was a little egotistical. He couldn't help himself. He wanted her so much, he just hoped she wanted him as badly.

She looked up into his eyes and knew exactly what she had to do. "Carter, why did you break up with me?" Abby asked out of the blue.

He stared at her. "What?"

"You heard me." She retorted.

"I was in a bad place then, and I felt it was the only way I could be kind to you was if I broke it off."

"But it didn't do anything for us, we fight worse now than we did when we were together."

"I know and I hate it. This tonight feels so right. It Feel's Like Home to me." He said moving closer to her.

"I know what you mean. I thought I could live without you but I can't. John we still have things that needed to be talked about but please can we try again." She said edging her way closer to him.

"I think we could do that." He said as he wrapped her in his arms. Looking down to where she sat, he could see the love in her eyes. Love that he felt for her and hoped was reflecting in his eyes for her. "It feels like I'm all the back to where I belong."