A/N: This is my contribution to the Banna Celebration. It was supposed to be fluffy but it turned more into introspective mushy reflection whoops.
The bulk of this was written before that clip from S5E1 was released.
To make my life easier and not have to do research like the lazy person that I am, I've made up the town that they are visiting.
Prompt: "Anna and John spend a day prospecting the hotel they are thinking of purchasing, and sightseeing in the local area."
Disclaimer: I don't own Downton Abbey.
It was always odd to wake up in the wrong bed. The disorienting feeling of not being at home, covered in someone else's blanket, the surroundings unexpected and foreign.
Strangely enough, it did not bother Anna this time, slowly blinking her eyes, adjusting to the light that filtered through the cream colored curtains. Perhaps it was because she got to wake up natural, something that she craved pretty much her entire life. She had been afforded it time to time, but this week she had been blessed by lie-ins everyday, no kitchen maid knocking on the door at 6 o'clock like in years past, no alarm rudely disturbing the silence in the more recent times.
But no, the reason everything still felt familiar was because she could feel her husband's arms around her, closely tucking her against his body, his nose buried in her hair, the occasional snore escaping.
In the end, home was wherever John was. They had unfortunately spent several periods away from each other through one horrible mess or another. But they had always made it through and back to one another, and that's what they were doing now.
Anna was a country girl at heart, having a tremendous soft spot for Downton, imagining her future there in various forms over the years. However, she'd go wherever she had to be with him. Even if they had to leave the country, she once said. Even if they had to go to the moon, she now mused.
They both had mentioned leaving service several times in the past year, often prompted by those bad days she wish she could get rid of forever but knew she couldn't. John would typically be the one to bring up going somewhere to start over, to get away from it all. But a few times she did, the words flying out of her mouth, and then not revisiting them later for a real proper discussion, making her wonder if it was the heat of the moment that made her think such things. But it had been the plan once, long ago. To leave Downton at some point and embark on their own journey as hotel proprietors.
Then about a month ago, she received a letter with their tenants' rent check. They had more to offer on the house this time. John had rejected their previous bid, thinking it too low. He hadn't included Anna in that decision, hastily—and secretly—popping into London to meet with them. This time he said that it was up to her. But she covered his hands with hers said it was a decision that they'd make together.
The couple had been granted some time off, Lady Mary and Lord Grantham insisting that they were due to have a more extended holiday. Initially, the trip was to look at hotels, seeing if there were even any in their price range with the money they'd get from the house grouped with their savings. They started up in Whitby near the sea, and slowly made their way back to Downton.
John was fussier than her. Even though she'd reassure him that they could fix up any of these aging buildings the way they did the cottage, he still brooded. He was just didn't feel like any that they had seen were just right, fixating on a perfect idea that he just was not finding.
But the time spent not looking at the hotels—that was the time they needed. The time just spent… being. They sat hours in the sand, the sea lapping at their feet. They strolled through villages, slowly making their way down the roads arm in arm. He would turn and see the genuine, peaceful smile on her face, and then a grin would unfold on his.
While they had formed their new normal, John found that this was the closest that they had been to living in some time. Anna's way of dealing with stress, as it always had been, was to throw herself into her work, concentrating her energy there and in an effort to not let other thoughts sneak in. That distraction allowed her to get by day-to-day, but he was always afraid that she was bottling it up too much.
Here, it was just the two of them, and they could relax, not worrying about their employers and their bells ringing and dinners and the whole of it. He wished that they could just live in these calm moments, realizing that even if they did buy a hotel, they'd then be introduced to their own world of hustle and bustle, with guests coming and going.
But it would be their world. And there would be that certain freedom they'd gain as their own bosses.
He awoke now hazy, feeling his wife shift in his arms. It took a bit to remember. They were at their final stop, a small inn near Ripon. They hadn't stayed in all of the hotels they were looking at, but they did some to see how it would feel to be a guest there. This inn was smaller then many they looked at in Whitby, apparently often used as a little getaway for couples from York, and often people just traveling through. Anna mentioned that it reminded her of the one that Lady Sybil and Mr. Branson had run away to once. The owners were retiring, and they had their proper appointment with them this afternoon, allowing the younger couple some time to get to know the area a bit beforehand.
John was afraid he was going to have to force himself to like the place, as it was the last, and he didn't want to seem defeated, at least for Anna's sake. But thus far, from what he could tell on their first night, it was the best kept of them all. He already liked the proximity to Downton—with Ripon not to far, it was only a bus ride away. While Anna didn't admit it, he knew that she'd like to be as close to Mrs. Hughes and Lady Mary as possible, and he always appreciated their support that the two women gave his wife.
Anna could tell that he was awake now from his breathing. She turned onto her back, him rearranging his arms to be more comfortable in this position.
He pressed a kiss into the crown of her head. "Good morning, darling."
She smiled contently. "A very good morning to you as well." She now turned on her side toward him, pressing her hands against his chest and snuggling her head into his shoulder. "I could stay like this forever. Or for awhile anyway."
John chuckled. "Well not too long, we have places to be today."
She looked up at him, then raised up a bit to press her lips again his. "Fine," she teased, smiling as she pulled away from the kiss.
He smiled back, content in her contentment.
They dressed and headed to the inn's little buffet for breakfast. The food was set up in a long table at one end, and small round ones filled the rest of the room like a tea parlour.
"I feel like Lord Grantham," John commented as he settled down at their table with his plate.
"Well, you are dressed just as smartly as him if not more," Anna said, eyeing him in his nicest suit. He was trying to play every part the business man in their appointments with the owners they were speaking to. She had on a loose, pale blue dress that brought out the color of her eyes, her hair done up in a bun, as customary.
"I suppose that's because I have in hand dressing both his lordship and I," he joked with a cheeky grin.
She chuckled in reply, but then leaned in, lowering her voice, "But you cut a finer figure than him."
John mocked surprise. "Such talk at the breakfast table, Mrs. Bates! Mr. Carson would not fancy that now would he?" Later, he'd realize that it was almost bittersweet that very soon the people mentioned back home would not be in their daily lives, if everything went to plan.
She was having a hard time suppressing her laughter now.
He grinned and leaned toward her again. "But since he's not here, I will say this: your figure is the most beautiful I have ever seen, and ever will see."
That made Anna blush a slight bit as she swatted her husband playfully on the arm. She giggled, but she really did feel a great sense of comfort in his words. That he still loved her after everything, and still through everything now – loved her even more, he would say. It was almost too immense to describe, filling up her insides to almost an overwhelming level, her heart almost flying out of her chest. John often said that he didn't deserve her, but in her eyes, it was the other way around. And to be able to flirt like this again in such a carefree manner was just a sign of how far they had come in the last two years.
The church was small but beautiful; the stained glass windows portraying Bible scenes John knew well but didn't really believe in. Since first arriving in Downton, he went to church to keep up appearances. Going to service on Sunday was just what the servants did. But as he fell in love with Anna, he went for her sake. Her beliefs did not necessarily match that of the vicar's, not seeing the need for such rules and regulations when God was someone you seek anywhere. According to her that is. John's religious background mirrored his heritage; mother was raised Catholic, but his father Anglican. But what he really worshiped was Anna.
He watched her now, gazing at the architecture, her hat hiding her serene face as turned to face the altar. He gripped the pamphlet that explains the building's history, but didn't bother to read it.
She stopped and turned back to face him. He couldn't stop himself from smiling when he saw that old familiar spark in her eye.
"Remember how you wanted a church wedding?"
"Well, you deserved one. You still do," he affirmed.
She walked her fingers along one of the backs of a pew. "And I still wouldn't change it."
"Neither would I," he said.
"There are other important ceremonies that happen in a church," she said very softly, her eyes now cast down.
After tucking the pamphlet into his pocket, he reached out and squeezed her hand. Someday, the gesture promised. Maybe in this very church. Although he's sure that she had imagined it several times back at St. Mary's in Downton, as had he. Friends gathered to christen their little one, clad in a little white gown. Him still looking like a fool. Anna finally being the mother she was destined to be.
She drew in her breath, not wanting to be carried away in her own day dreams. One step at a time, she reminded herself. She smiled up at him and let go of his hand only to link arms with him and lead them towards the exit.
It would take a service there for her to know if she actually liked the church, but it was a Friday. But she liked the airy atmosphere of the otherwise cavernous hall, and looking at John, things felt right. Long ago she had learned to trust and believe in that.
There were pink and purple flowers adorning the path right outside, reminding her of her wedding bouquet. Still blooming regardless of the turning seasons. Some of the tree's leaves were beginning to change color, dotting yellows and oranges in the branches.
The village was a little larger than Downton, probably because it did not have a large estate of an earl backing it and providing employment. Thus, everything was more centered here in this area. On their stroll they passed the post office, the doctor's, the schoolhouse, the pubs. But the number of small shops was practically double.
John was not very fond of shopping, at least not for himself. He enjoyed spending time with his wife, and did like spending money on her as well. Picking out something for her was something he put his heart into, but getting something for himself was too tedious a process for him. He typically knew exactly what he needed and wanted to be in and out as quickly as possible. But if he was buying a something for Anna, he'd take hours mulling over the right gift.
She, one the other hand, did like to window shop. Growing up without much money, she did not have a huge want for material items, but she did like to look at things she used to not be able to afford. Although they had sustainable funds now, all that she still wanted was to save for the very purpose of why they were visiting in the first place. So they did a lot of looking without buying.
Luckily, today Anna took him into a bookstore. They tended to make book purchases together, as he often read them out loud to her before bed. It used to be an indulgence for when they had time after he had returned home since his release, but in the last years it was more of a routine that helped ease her enough to drift off to sleep.
The selection of titles was quite good for a smaller town, meaning that it wouldn't take a trip into Ripon necessarily in order to get a newer release. Anna examined a few books before ultimately deciding that she didn't want them, at least not today.
They returned to their stroll, Anna commenting that she hoping that all this walking this past week hadn't put too much strain on him. John assured her that his leg was perfectly all right. Every once and awhile his knee would ache after a day of being out and about, but it was nothing too painful and he was glad of it. He knew that she never thought of him as slowing her down over the years, something he was always so grateful for, but he wanted to make the most of this trip.
The village's atmosphere was quaint, and the hotel's clientele would probably mostly be people visiting relatives nearby or a stopping point in a longer journey. But has they had been told last night, many couples came to get away from the city.
And isn't that what they were really doing now? "Getting away." A change of scenery. But it didn't matter how far they traveled from Downton Abbey – she'd never be fully rid of the memories of that horrid night and the months that followed. They were at a point where it was mostly kept at bay, but that didn't mean that they would be tomorrow. It probably helped not being where it happened now. But she reminded herself, that this had been a dream of theirs, almost ten years ago. And she wasn't going to let anything stop that dream, or make her doubt it.
Anna looked up at John from under her hat as they neared the hotel, almost time for their appointment with the owners. He caught her eye and together they smiled.
She sat at the small table, repinning a few loose hairs here and there. He glanced himself over behind her, brushing his shoulders off with a brush.
Their eyes meet in the mirror. "I think… I think I like this place the best." She turned now to look at him. "I know we haven't seen much of the inn itself yet, but things, things just feel right."
"I'm glad that you think like that, because I quite agree." He sat the brush down and gave her shoulder a squeeze. She pressed against him. "We'll still need to see, and we don't need to rush into anything, but… yes."
The two headed downstairs to meet with the owners who were now retiring. The Hortons were also a married couple, and much older than Mr. Carson and Mrs. Hughes. They were going to move in with their daughter and her family in Kirby, and were looking to sell to another couple.
"We were in service ourselves. I was a kitchen maid, and him a groomsman," Mrs. Horton said after introductions were made. Anna liked the woman right away and hoped that they liked her and John just as much.
The husband led the tour of the small hotel, showing off the lobby, sitting rooms, dining room, as well as into the kitchens. It was in very good shape. John could tell that they had taken lovingly care of it, and Anna took notice of all the little touches that the older couple had poured into it.
The last stop was at the cottage that was located to the back of the inn itself.
"Do you have any children?" Finally the looming question had been asked, Mrs. Horton eyeing the Bateses.
After an uneasy pause, Anna answered, "Not yet." She tried to not look too wistful.
John caught her eye and gave her a reassuring smile.
The older woman smiled as well. "Well when the time comes, you'll see that that the living quarters are quite spacious to fit a large family."
The personal residence looked a little more lived in than the hotel, but it still was well taken care of, nothing like the state Mrs. Bow had left their current home. Anna looked at John, who seemed to be scrutinizing every corner. Her eyes fell to the pencil markings on the door frame, labeling the Horton children's heights, wondering that if they were to paint over them that they'd soon be making some of their own.
They could see that they were being judged as well. The older couple had spent a very large chunk of their lives running this hotel, and they weren't going to sell it to just anyone. But it seemed like they were taking the next part in their own journey as well.
Luckily, they seemed to be living up to the Hortons' standards, and they didn't need to do much to pass muster. The four went over some of the details at tea. It was within their price range. Anna glanced at John, but his eyes reminded her that this wasn't something they could do hastily. They would discuss it tonight before making their decision.
The Hortons treated the Bateses to dinner before the latter couple returned to their room for the evening. John settled onto the bed, right leg stretched out. Anna joined him, nestled her head into his shoulder.
They did not speak for awhile. She broke the silence. "To finally leave service after so many years…" She sat up, turning to face him. "I know that it's not a decision to make lightly. But I do think that the time has arrived. I can see us happy here—I am happy here now."
He reached up and rubbed her shoulder. "It is a major decision—major change." There was a pause, his eyes looking squaring into hers. "I'm ready if you are."
She nodded, determined. "I am. I know… I know that so much hasn't gone as we planned. This is one thing that we can decide on."
His hand dropped down to grasp hers, their fingers intertwined. "It's settled then. We'll speak to the Hortons in the morning. The final paperwork will be drawn up later, pending the sell of the house…"
John trailed off, noticing the tears threatening to fall from his wife's eyes as she smiled. Echoes of a conversation held many years ago sprang to his mind again. This was a step towards the future that they had dreamed for so long. A future that had been threatened so many times. But those dreams would not be squashed, and even though they still had a ways to go, they could make the distance together.
A/N: I didn't have the portion with Hortons written up earlier and work has been crazy so that bit is much more rushed that I had planned. I feel it's like "whoops, she ran out of steam!" but alas, real life happens and I wanted this up before S5 and in time for the celebration.