Bubbles And Boxers


You just got disclaimed!


Seifer pulled his truck up in front of a building with the sign 'Lex's Luxurious Laundromat' on the front. Raijin had been going on and on about how soft his underwear had been after getting them washed at this place. A sharp smack to the back of the head had shut Raijin up, but Seifer still decided to try this place out anyway.

Hoisting the large laundry bag out of the bed of his truck, Seifer slung it over his shoulder as he walked into the building. The first thing that he saw was a hulking brute of a man standing behind the counter, looking very intimidating. The only thought that Seifer had was that this place had to run by the mafia. Hearing a customer come in, the man stood up from where he had been leaning on the counter, revealing a white lace trimmed apron with two large pockets on the front with 'Lex' embroidered on the front.

'What the fuck?' Seifer thought, 'Is this guy some kind of fruit or something?' Walking up to the counter, Seifer set the bag on the floor. "I hear you guys have an awesome drop off laundry service."

Lexaeus just nodded, pulling out an order pad from one of the pockets of his apron. "I'll need your info then, Kid."

'Shit,' Seifer thought, hearing the deep voice that was more than a little intimidating. This place was definitely mafia owned.

Quickly giving out his information, Seifer handed the large bag over, taking the claim slip that was handed to him and walked out the door, wondering if it had been a good idea to give out all his information to such a frightening man so freely.

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"Bubbles! There are bubbles on the sign! Look, Seifer! Look!" Demyx squealed, pulling on his cousin's sleeve as they walked through the Laundromat doors.

"Shut up, bubble brain," Seifer said, rolling his eyes as he walked up to the counter, ringing the bell when he got there.

Hearing a huff from behind the counter, the cousins were both surprised to see Hayner sitting there, video game in hand. The counter had basically hidden him from view. "What the hell? Are you blind? Couldn't you see me sitting there? Why'd you ring the stupid bell?" Hayner growled, his mood instantly fouling when he saw who was there in front of him.

"Hey Hayner!" Demyx smiled, "I didn't know you worked here."

Hayner turned away from Seifer, ignoring him for the time being. "Yeah, my Dad owns this place. Being prom season, he is overrun with alteration requests, so he needed an extra set of hands on the counter."

"Whatever, lamer. I'm just here to pick up my laundry," Seifer sneered, thrusting the claim ticket towards Hayner.

Grumbling to himself about moronic assholes, Hayner snatched the slip out of the older bully's hand before walking into the back room.

"Aw, Hayner is growing up to be such a cutie, isn't he Seifer?" Demyx smiled, wistfully as he leaned on the counter.

Seifer just glared at his airhead cousin. "The fuck? Who would ever think that that Chicken Wuss is cute?"

Demyx gave a smirk worthy of his cousin, "With an ass like that, I'd totally tap it."

Raising an eyebrow at the completely non-Demyx like thing to say, Seifer just growled before punching Demyx in the shoulder.

"Owie! Seifer, that hurt!" whined Demyx playfully, rubbing his shoulder.

At that moment, Hayner returned, toting the large canvas bag that Seifer had dropped off the day before. Seeing Seifer with a fist raised and a grinning Demyx rubbing his arm, Hayner raised an eyebrow. "Do I even want to know?"

An evil gleam shone in Demyx's eyes as he smirked at his cousin before turning to Hayner with a large smile. "We were just talking about cute asses that Seifer wants to tap."

Not bothering to dignify that with a response, Seifer just swung his fist in his cousin's general direction.

Anticipating just such a move, Demyx quickly began to move sideways to dodge. "Ha ha! You missed m…" As the last word left Demyx's lips, his hip met the edge of the counter with such a force that it sent the young man flailing, feet in the air over the counter only to land flat on his ass next to Hayner's feet.

Hayner looked down with a slight chuckle at the youth on the floor who was wearing a grimace of pain. "Uh, you know it probably would have hurt less to just let him hit you."

Seifer just leaned over the counter, smirking at his fallen cousin. "Serves you right, bubble brain."

Rubbing his butt where he had fallen on the concrete floor, Demyx winced as he looked up first at Hayner, then at Seifer. "You do realize that Hayner has been rifling through your Capt. Cactuar and the Tonberry Prince underpants, right?"

Flushing only slightly, Seifer then grabbed the bag from Hayner's hands and with a huff, slammed some munny on the counter before storming towards the door. "You can find your own way home now, Asswipe."

Hayner quickly counted the munny, scowling when he discovered the total. "Hey, what about a tip? I folded all your damn clothes."

Seifer didn't reply, just raised his hand over his shoulder, flipping Hayner the bird.

Growling and letting out a string of colourful expletives, Hayner cursed Seifer's existence several times over.

"I think he likes you," Demyx said with a grin, still sitting on the floor.

Glaring at the fallen blond, Hayner saw a large pile of white out of the corner of his eye. Not caring about the consequences, Hayner pushed the large pile of clean sheets right over onto Demyx's head. Ignoring Demyx's cries, Hayner just sighed and walked into the back room.

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A month passed by before Seifer realized that he was just about out of clean clothes. Walking into the Laundromat, he smirked when he saw his favourite torture victim standing behind the counter, dealing with a perky brunette who was talking a mile a minute.

"Alright, Hayney? I want the hem brought up just below the point where my dad won't kill me, alright?"

Hayner looked up when he heard someone else enter the store, brown eyes going wide when he saw just who it was who entered. "Uh, okay, Selph. So that means that you want it floor length with no flesh showing?" he said with a smile, trying not to think of who was standing behind his cousin.

"No no no no no, Hayney! Just enough to cover my cute little bum," Selphie grinned, shaking her ass for emphasis.

"Uh, I'm not going to be the one responsible for your death at the hands of Xigbar, because I'd be the next to die. Maybe you should come back tomorrow when Pops is in," Hayner said.

"Oh poopie drawers. You're no fun," Selphie answered with a pout, "Well; I'll leave the dress here and come back tomorrow then. Okay, bye bye Hayney!" Selphie then turned and bounded out of the shop.

Lifting the dress up and holding it out as to not let it drag on the floor, Hayner turned to walk into the alterations room, nearly forgetting about the other customer.

"I don't think that yellow is quite your colour, Hayney. But you should try the same style in green."

Growing beat red, Hayner turned quickly to face the smirking blond bully. Making a retardly frustrated noise, Hayner glared at Seifer. "I don't have time for this crap," he muttered, hustling to put the dress in the alterations room. Trudging back out, Hayner's vision narrowed when he saw that Seifer was still there. "What are you still here for? Couldn't you have just filled out the ticket and left it for me?"

Still smirking, Seifer dropped the heavy bag on the counter. "If I did that, how will I know that you will take care of my things just how I wanted them taken care of?"

"Listen here," Hayner snapped, "I have been doing your fucking laundry long enough that I know what the hell I'm doing, asshole. And you don't even have the courtesy to give me a goddamn tip!"

"Aw, little lamer is going to make the perfect little housewife for someone someday," Seifer smirked, "You even have the dress for it now."

That was the last straw for Hayner as his entire vision went red as he swung to the other side of the counter without thinking. "I have had enough of your crap, Seifer!" Standing chest to chest with the taller bully, Hayner lost it as he began to push and shove the man who had made his life hell for so long backwards into the Laundromat section. "You've picked on me since the first time you saw me! What have I ever done to deserve the shit that you've put me through? I have dealt with it long enough! I'm not going to put up with it anymore! You are an asshole and a bully. You never think about how the things you do and say affect other people. No one should have to put up with any of that!"

Without realizing how far they had moved, Seifer's legs hit against something solid after being forced backwards across the room by Hayner. He was pressed against the washing machine. He never knew that the little Chicken Wuss had it in him.

At that moment, Hayner finally realized just what was happening and who it was he was verbally attacking. Brown eyes widened to the size of saucers as the situation suck in.

Taking opportunity of Hayner's temporary paralysis, Seifer seized Hayner by the shoulders and flipped the shorter man around so that he was now the one pressed against the washing machine. "You sure have a set of balls on you, kid," Seifer said with an odd tone in his voice.

Gulping hard, Hayner winced and slammed his eyes closed, waiting for the blow to fall. Before he knew what was happening, a warm set of lips were pressed against his own. Brown eyes flew open to see that it was indeed Seifer kissing him. A million thoughts were running through his head, but before Hayner could figure any of them out, Seifer pulled away.

"I didn't fill out a ticket, so don't fuck up my clothes, Chicken Wuss," Seifer whispered with a husky growl before turning and walking out of the store, leaving a stunned Hayner still leaning against the washing machines.

Hayner just stood there, a hand pressed to his lips as he tried to figure out exactly what had just happened. Had Seifer really just kissed him? Why had he done that and why did it leave Hayner wanting more?

At that moment, the door opened and for a moment, Hayner thought that the large silhouette was Seifer returning to finish what he started. He was slightly disappointed when the figure stepped further into the building that it was only his father returning from his errands.

"Hi son, how's the day going?" Lexaeus questioned, walking behind the counter.

Snapping out of his daze, Hayner just sighed. "I'm not quite sure what to tell you, Pops."


Capt Cactuar and the Tonberry Prince is the property of Crym And Pahoyhoy's seriously deranged minds, please don't steal them, because honestly, they will take over your souls and force you to watch old reruns of their long cancelled TV show, including the banned musical episode!

Now for the obligitory ending message:

If you like this story please check out some of our other stories from our Family Tree Universe in our archives :) And as always, if you would like to see where the pairings and family lines came from please go view our deviant art page, http :/ crymsonpahoyhoy . deviantart . com /, minus all of the spaces ;) The deviations are called FF KH Family Tree.

P.S. Oh please, oh please, oh please review! It will make us want to write more if you like it :D