DISCLAIMER: This anime and all its original contents and characters belong to Amano Akira-sama.
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A/N: Inspired by Goong/Princess Hours OST "Crystal Flower", "Instrumental 1", "Instrumental 5" and "Ice Pond" [gosh, classical music is so good!] and those adorable R27 KHR fics out there. Er, but this one is really 27R, not the other way around. *wink* Title is taken from Cowboy Bebop Episode 8 "Waltz for Venus". ^.^
Er, and yes I almost forgot. Listening to the OST disclosed on the above paragraph might be of great help in understanding the mood of the story better. *wink* It's available on youtube and very easy to search.
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WALTZ WITH VENUS
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"Reborn."
"Yes?"
"I have been your student for a long time…and you taught me everything I needed to learn…but…"
"But?"
"…but…there is—there is something else I have always wanted to know."
"What?"
"I want to… I want to know how to make love to you."
…o
Sounds were coming closer. He didn't mind. His eyes were closed and there was no way he could nudge them open. But someone was calling to him. It was no more than a faint whisper but he was sure there was.
"Reborn."
He didn't move. He couldn't even if he wanted to. Tubes were inserted in almost every part of his body, pumping air onto his lungs and warmth to his almost-frozen body and fluids and substances that were supposed to keep him alive. Alive. Lying in this wretched bed alone in the world, condemned to be alive. Death would have been a more pleasant alternative. At least to him.
Was it really?
Of course it was. Pray tell, what else was he to do? He didn't want to waste his time all over again waiting for something he knew would never come true. He couldn't be, shouldn't be, waiting. He had been waiting for how many years already and all that was given him was but another set of empty promises fated to be unfulfilled forever. A person in his sane mind would immediately realize the nullity of such, and yet, as though his keen reason had snapped, as though he weren't the world's strongest hitman gifted with the ability to steal countless lives without batting an eyelid, he believed those promises, cherished them, clung to them, as if they were already attached to the core of his being from the time he was born, the reason of his existence.
"Reborn."
Sounds were coming closer. Footsteps, glasses clicking, merry laughter and the sound of violins.
…o
He was tired. A cheerful atmosphere filled the hall and the faces gracing the celebration were mostly familiar but he didn't have the heart to talk to anyone save for Leon walking on the brim of his fedora which cast a shadow fairly covering his dark eyes. The soft waltz played by the mini orchestra seemed to be a lullaby humming him to sleep and he had almost considered taking a nap in his chair if not for the hand gently touching his shoulder.
"Reborn." It was him, Sawada Tsunayoshi, the newly honored Vongola Decimo who officially received his title just an hour ago. He still wore that familiar gentle expression on his face and his eyes bespoke concern…and something else even his tutor couldn't figure out.
He lifted his face and stared back. "Yes?" Their eyes met.
His student seemed flustered for a moment, as though he had forgotten his original intent. "I-I…no, I mean, everybody was looking for you a-and…"
"And?" he said, almost chuckling, urging the young boss to go on.
"E-eh? A-and, well…yeah. B-Bianchi too and..a-and..yeah."
"I could see you're still uneasy." He tossed his wineglass empty and walked away.
"Hey, don't blame me," said the young mafioso running after him. "I'm just…not used to it. Seeing you like that." Was that a blush? And the other one a sigh? "Really. You should have chosen to stay a baby forever. It would have suited you better."
His eyebrows quirked in reaction, fingers reflexively pulling a gun from his holster, and pointed it to his converser's forehead.
Tsuna's hands went up in the air immediately, as if he were some burglar caught in the act. "I'm sorry already! I won't say anything anymore!"
He smirked, putting the gun down. They were silent for a moment, walking endlessly, wordlessly, around the decorated chamber. The guardians and the members of the famiglia and its associates were obviously enjoying the night, either drinking or chatting or waltzing on the dance floor, except the Decimo's right hand man who had been viciously eyeing every suspicious person sticking close to his Juudaime. But Reborn wasn't someone suspicious, thus escaping the Storm Guardian's glare. And so, they walked on. The silence between them was eerie yet there was no room for discomfort and Tsuna's prior uneasiness had miraculously evaporated.
"Say," said Sawada all of a sudden. "Adonis was foolish, wasn't he?"
"What makes you say so?" the hitman asked back, realizing they had just stopped in front of a statue, an almost perfect copy of Venus de Milo.
"How could he refuse the goddess of love herself? Had he done otherwise, they could have been happy forever."
The former smirk became a quasi- chuckle. "Even if he had done otherwise, his fate would remain tragic. She was a goddess; he was no more than a mere mortal."
"You're right," replied the young Vongola, and even if it was faint, he could hear a tinge of sadness in that gentle voice. "But maybe…maybe if he had just said yes, maybe he could have been happy even if it were but for a moment."
His brows quirked for a second time and his lips involuntarily smiled. What could have brought this topic on, he didn't know. Maybe it was the statue. "Adonis never cared about her. It was Venus' fault for jumping on him. She had no goddess pride at all."
The formerly forlorn aura was torn apart by a reproachful look and a protest. "Oi, Reborn! You really are so…"
"Speaking of Venus," he said facing Kyoko's direction, "she had been waiting since last hour. Why don't you dance with her, Dame-Adonis?"
A blush. "But I don't know how to dance."
"Inventing excuses, huh. You're quite excellent. Keep it up and your Venus would also keep on ignoring your feelings."
For a moment, he thought he saw a flash of pain in those ochre eyes which was immediately washed out by a fake sunny smile. And he didn't like it. He didn't like seeing such lack of resolve, such cowardice. "I wouldn't mind," said Tsuna. "My Venus never looked at me anyway."
'Gah, that was it.' The gun was pulled from its holster once more and everyone was startled by the sound of fired bullets. "You call yourself my student yet you've got no backbone. Honestly, did you really learn anything from me?"
"I did! Of course, I did!" said Tsuna nervously who had hidden himself behind the statue. How pathetic.
"Then show me your courage and go dance with her." Or else…he added to himself.
"I get it! I get it already! But…" It was that but again and he hated it. "…but I really don't know a thing about waltz and I don't want to disgrace myself in public so…" There was that blush again.
He suppressed the urge to roll his eyes but he couldn't help but twitch. "And so?" He didn't like how Tsuna acted so helpless as though the rough, Spartan training he had gone through with his tutor did not transform him a bit. He never changed.
"And so…" There were those footsteps coming towards him, slow footsteps, too slow, too soft.
That uncertainty. Maybe there was something he didn't know? He didn't want to think anymore. He was losing his cool. His prior weariness had gone deep down his bones and yet here he was, coaxing some timid young man to muster his courage for something so…
"…so…will you…will you teach me?"
It couldn't be helped. He sighed. He wanted it to be over consuming as little time as possible. "Alright. Stand back and follow me."
"E-eh? You won't hold me or something?"
He laughed, mockingly that is. "I'm not a woman, you see, and I only know how to dance as a man." There was that frustrated look on his student's face and he almost shook his head. "Just follow the beat of the music. Waltz is slow and you'll easily learn it even with that slow brain of yours. Are you ready?"
And so, they danced to the rhythm of the violins, a voice asking, the other instructing, a slap, a low cry, a couple of bullets firing, a timid sorry, a stern 'this way, that way'. It lasted for almost an hour.
"No, not that way. How many times do I have to tell you? Remember, I'm not a dance instructor and my patience is short. I might just strangle you to death here."
"Sorry…"
"I'm getting tired of this. Maybe this is enough. Go."
"E-eh? B-but…"
"Just go already." Well, it wasn't his fault that his foot was itching to kick Dame-Tsuna's butt which sent the poor guy flying towards his lady love, nervously asking for a dance. He chuckled. How embarrassing must it have been for the young Vongola. Kyoko, however, was so gracious and accepted the timid offer.
He smiled at his success and sat on a chair enjoying his red wine. The violins kept playing and Leon walked on his fedora. He had almost fallen asleep but stopped himself to see how the young boss was faring. 'There he is.' There they were indeed, dancing with hands held together, bodies so close almost in a tight embrace, both young and beautiful, a perfect pair, he thought approvingly.
"Darling." It was Bianchi. He nodded at her and she sat beside him and clung to his arm, leaning her head on his shoulder. Just then, when he lifted his eyes to see his student's progress, there were those ochre eyes transfixed on him, that familiar expression of pain and sadness and longing. He was burned. He looked away. That was something he didn't quite comprehend.
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"Reborn. Are you leaving?"
Leaves were falling, dry and dead, almost crumpled, blown away by the autumn wind, whirling around as they fell down, down, down.
"Yes," he simply replied not looking back. He needed to escape. He hated showing any signs of cowardice yet he had to run away as far as he could; he couldn't be too picky, he simply had no other options to choose from.
"I see. Be well."
I will never come back.
He did his best for weeks already. Did his best ignoring those glances, those stares which seemed to undress him every time sending goosebumps on his skin. Did his best pretending not to understand the hidden meaning behind those gifts, of those flowers. He did his best and it hadn't been an easy task. And when it had gone too far, when it had been too obvious for him to pretend not to notice, for the sake of the famiglia, for the sake of his precious student's reputation and for the sake of his own dignity, he chose to run away.
I will never come back.
And yet when the summons came, he couldn't refuse.
"The famiglia needs you. We need your opinion concerning delicate matters."
"The boss is there. Couldn't he formulate decisions on his own?"
"The Tenth is still too young and you know that our rival families might use his lack of experience to take advantage of the Vongola. The Ninth is in the other world already and no other person could provide the boss the guidance he needs. He needs you."
He closed his eyes. He couldn't say no. He could only sigh in despair. He needed to escape because Tsuna might just persuade him and he might just be carried away and say yes.
"It was Venus' fault…she had no goddess pride at all."
"I have been your student for a long time…and you taught me everything I needed to learn…but…"
"But?"
"There is…there is something I have always wanted to know…"
"What is it?"
"I want to…I want to know…how to make love to you."
A warm finger touched his cheek gently. He closed his eyes. He couldn't say no.
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There were flowers in his palms, fingers on his wrists, that familiar fluff of hair, that scent, that head lying face downwards, warm breathing on his neck, lips touching his collarbone. He wanted to open his eyes but the sunlight coming from the window was just too bright. He must have forgotten to close the blinds again. He moved a little. The young mafioso on top of him stirred, waking up, and whispered, "Dear Venus, are you awake?"
His face turned sour, disgusted at being called by such name. "Stop calling me that. And yes, I'm awake so get moving before I kill you, Dame-Tsuna."
It had been like this for a long time and nobody in the famiglia noticed anything odd between them. Nobody knew of the promises they made, of the happiness they shared within the confinements of this little room. Tsuna's room. After all, would there be anything wrong with a male student sharing a room with his male tutor?
He got up, dragging the blanket along with him, and went to lie on his hammock. He closed his eyes and sighed. He had lost his mind already and he wanted to keep his cool at least.
"I would really love it if you'd dance with me."
"For the sake of the famiglia, have some shame. I already let you do what you wanted to do with me. Wasn't it enough, for you?"
"So...does it...does it mean you just…forced yourself?"
"...No, I..."
"Do you love me?"
"…Of course I do…"
"If you do, why won't you just trust me? You know that I'm ready to leave everything for you. Why don't we just tell them everything about us?"
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"I want to marry you."
"You already know you can't. This relationship is a breach to our Code of Honor and you will be sentenced to die the moment this leaks out."
There were those tears again falling from those ochre eyes and he couldn't help but kiss them away.
"I'm sorry. It's all my fault, isn't it, dragging you into this? I'm sorry. But I promise, I will stay with you even if I die. I know there will come a time when I can just dance with you without minding what other people would say."
He almost laughed, bitterly that is, at such foolish vow. But he believed.
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An invitation was given to him.
"What for?" he asked.
Yamamoto looked surprised. "But Reborn-san, didn't you know? Tsuna and Kyoko are getting married this spring. You have been sleeping in the same room and he didn't tell you?"
He smiled. "Uh, maybe I just forgot everything about it. Thank you for reminding me."
Wedding bells were ringing. He smiled, Bianchi was clinging on his arm, whispering her plans to have such gown for their wedding and such, but he didn't almost understand what she had been telling him. He was silently berating himself, chastising himself for giving in to such foolishness. He shouldn't have expected anything. Everything had been void from the beginning. Kyoko was where Tsuna belonged. And he belonged to no one else but Bianchi.
Wedding bells tolled once more.
"You planned it, didn't you? Tsuna and Kyoko last spring then you and Bianchi this fall?" Shamal teased. "Ah, I should have been more vigilant."
Bianchi frowned. He only smiled.
"At last, you decided to tie the knot, eh."
"Please take care of my sister."
"Congratulations."
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It should have ended already. They have been separated for good and he admitted it had been for the better. He didn't expect any problems anymore. There shouldn't be. It was over after all. And so, as he sat alone guarding the headquarters, he was surprised upon seeing those hands touching his. Arms were wrapped around his body as the lean torso pressed itself onto his back. Tsuna...don't...I...
"If you insist, this will be adultery on my part and yours as well," he whispered.
...might just be...
"I don't mind. I insist."
...carried away...
Long, slender fingers began undoing the buttons of his shirt. His tears began to fall. Again, he couldn't say no.
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"I want to marry you."
"You know you can't."
"I will marry you no matter what. I promise."
He lifted the wineglass and took a sip of his champagne. Bianchi was clinging to him. It had been two years since Sasagawa Kyoko died and Tsuna was standing on the altar with Miura Haru, his new bride.
"She had been waiting for so long and there she is, happily married at last. She's really something, isn't she, darling?"
He nodded in response, putting an arm around his wife's shoulder.
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A kiss was planted on his shoulder.
"You've been married twice already and yet…"
"I will take all the blame."
"Even if you did, I'd still be responsible. Don't you know when to stop?"
"I don't. I'm sorry."
And when those fingers touched his face, he could only cry. He couldn't say no.
"Time will come, I could dance with you without minding what others would say. It will come, believe me. I promise you it will."
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Sounds were coming closer. Tears were in his eyes. There was that voice calling him.
"Reborn. Are you awake?"
'Yes.'
"Dear Venus, do you still remember what I promised you?"
'Of course I do. How can't I, you good-for-nothing? And stop calling me that. It pisses me off.'
There was that laugh. "Then will you come with me? I have learned much about waltz already and I have been dying to dance with you."
'I can't.'
"You can."
He tried to open his eyes and he was surprised that he actually could. Maybe this was a dream? But it was too real to be a dream. He could clearly see that face leaning over him. "Can you walk?"
"I can't," he replied.
"Figures. I'd have to carry you then."
He was lifted up. He didn't want to look so helpless but he didn't mind his pride at all as he felt those warm arms around him. It was too late when he remembered the life-prolonging tubes which were so easily torn away from his body. And he was too surprised to know that he didn't need them at all. He closed his eyes.
When he opened them, he could see that hall of long ago, where Tsuna had asked him to teach him how to dance. He laughed despite himself. And he was standing on the floor, gun on his holster hidden by his black suit, the fedora on his head, half-covering his eyes. There was the sound of violins, those warm hands on his waist, the fresh scent of flowers, white curtains hanging on the walls.
"I told you, didn't I, that I wanted to marry you? Well, you never answered me. So, dear Venus, will you marry me?"
"Gah, stop calling me that already."
"Come on. Just say it. Please."
"Oh well, I will marry you then, Dame-Adonis. I don't have the choice to say no, right?"
"Yep. You don't." There was that cheeky grin and his heart began to flutter.
"I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health... I will love you and honor you all the days of my life..."
It might have been absurd, but there was a ring slipped on his finger, and Tsuna had it on his finger too.
"Take this ring as a sign of my love..."
Their feet stepped from side to side, backwards, left, right, a turn, a glide, dancing over and over again to the melody of the violins. He felt himself melting in Tsuna's arms. He closed his eyes and let himself be drowned by the bright lights, by the soft music, by the overpowering sensation floating all over him. He knew then and there that love was both bitter and sweet and that the fleeting moment of happiness was worth more than the pain that came through with it.
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Gokudera was startled by the commotion outside. There were rings in his eyes and his nerves were too frayed to be disturbed. But he walked nevertheless till he heard something disturbing.
"The boss is gone!"
He frowned. Such foolishness. He couldn't blame the person yelling such absurdity though. The family had been very reliant upon their head and everyone couldn't just imagine Tsuna gone. But there was no running away from the truth. His Juudaime was dead, found ten days ago in his office with a dagger on his chest. Everyone was shocked and Reborn who had been very close to his boss suffered a nervous breakdown and was confined in the hospital barely alive and in a comatose state.
"Gokudera! The boss' body is gone!"
He frowned all the more, running towards the coffin where the cold corpse of his dear Juudaime was supposed to lie. And his mouth opened in shock when he actually found it empty, his feet stepping backwards as he saw footsteps on the floor, white lilies scattering all around. His phone rang. He answered the call, still in a daze.
"Reborn is gone!" It was Yamamoto who had been stationed where the respected hitman was confined. He could hear his comrade panting and he could hear sounds, other voices, besides the Rain Guardian's.
'Didn't you notice anything? Isn't this hospital supposed to have a high level of security?'
'There was nothing in there! We looked for evidence already! Watch the videos taken by the CCTV and see for yourself!'
'It must have been a rival family taking advantage of the boss' death.'
'But still, how couldn't there be a proof of the kidnapping? Are you trying to tell us he just disappeared?'
'Look. There were footsteps all over. And these white flowers!'
The Storm Guardian froze. Footsteps? Flowers? Just then, there was the sound of violins, as though coming from a performing orchestra. "Y-Yamamoto…"
"What?"
"I think I know where they are."
Everybody was startled. What could have happened? What could have happened?
They found themselves following the music towards that lonely hall. And before them, there were the white curtains, white flowers, wineglasses and tables as if there had been a wedding. Above the piano was a music box playing endlessly and beside it was the statue of Venus torn into pieces.
"What in the world is this..?" whispered Hibari.
For there on the floor filled with fresh lilies was their boss and his tutor, locked in a tender embrace.
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Owari
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Ouch…what has gotten into me? Writing some tragedy, huh? Yay…
Please review, reader-sama. Onegaishimasu…