Chapter One

2007

I had been nothing but a hollow shell since the night that Edward had decided to walk out of my life forever. That was almost 2 years ago. Today I sat with my friends, Jessica, Angela, Ben, and my boyfriend Mike Newton, as they listened to speech, after drawn out speech. Today I was graduating from high school. I've been told that this day is the one that marks the rest of your life, but for me, it was just another way to forget about him. The thought of those green eyes, and that hair, that sexy hair, made me want to cry less and less each day. It had taken a very, very long time, but I had finally made it. The pain was gone, almost.

When I thought of the person I was a year ago I cringed. I was nothing, and it was embarrassing to think about how I acted, I was so much stronger than that. I didn't need a man in my life to make me feel whole. I cant believe my thought process now. I'm so proud of myself. I never would have been this way before.

The person sitting next to me squeezed my hand reassuringly. I looked to my left and saw the huge toothy grin Jacob was giving me. He was a year younger than me, so he wouldn't be graduating until next year, but since our families are so close, they were the first ones Charlie decided to invite to my grad. After Renée of course. Billy Black was sitting in between Charlie and Jacob, who was also grinning at me. I suddenly got a shove from my right side.

"Bella, what the hell is wrong with you ?" I heard Jessica say under her breath. I finally got snapped out my daze, and realized that I had been called up to receive my diploma. I blushed profusely as I rose slowly out of my seat and stumbled over peoples feet and graduation gowns, nearly falling on my face as I tripped up the stairs leading to the stage. I got a round of applause when I was handed my diploma. I didn't know if it was because I had successfully made it through high school, or that I had successfully made it made it on stage without tripping, falling off the stage, and dying.

I noticed Jacob and Charlie were up on their feet, battling for who could clap and cheer the loudest. This made me laugh.

Jacob.

I don't even know how to begin to describe how I feel about Jacob. Of course I love him. With ever fibre in my body. He saved me after he left. It was a strong friendly love though, nothing romantic at all. We tried once, not recently, but it didn't take long for us to figure out that we couldn't be together that way. It would just ruin the great relationship that we already had. If it wasn't for him, I donty know what I would have done with myself last winter. He picked me right back up and put me back on my feet, made me feel alive again. Nothing I could ever do for him would repay him for how he helped me while I was down. I gave him a smile and walked off stage, being careful not to trip and fall down the stairs.

I got a huge group hug from the rest of my friends, and a round of "congratulations" and "way to go Bella's" once I made it back to my seat. For the first time in a really long time, I felt happy. Truly happy, and it was on my own terms, when I wanted to feel happy, not being forced to be happy, or putting on a fake smile for everyone. I cant even remember the last time I felt elation like this since I was with him. It felt good.

"Your still coming tonight, right Bella?" Jessica asked, leaning across Mike's lap. I smiled and nodded, yes.

Jessica had taken the longest to crack after my mental breakdown last year. It took her so long to forgive me after I had completely blown off my friends. I think it hit her the hardest. She was the first person who talked to me when I arrived at Forks High School, and the first person who I had become friends with. She must have felt so betrayed. It had taken her so long to forgive me, but she finally did. Now it feels like the past didn't even happen. We were inseparable. When I wasn't with Jake, I was with her. She was my rock.

And then there was Mike. For the first two years I was here he followed me around like a puppy dog, drooling over my ever word. I finally let him in just a few months ago, and right now I'm feeling like it was the best decision I had made in a long time. He didn't make me feel inferior. I felt love again with him, real love. This is what I had been waiting for. Of course our relationship upset both Jake and Charlie. Jake, only because I knew deep down he still held feelings for me, and Charlie, well, because Charlie wanted me to be with Jake. No matter what I did. I couldn't make everybody happy.

Mike leaned over and gave me a quick kiss on the cheek, and the student body erupted in cheers, hats flying everywhere. We had done it, graduated.

"I love you." Mike whispered softly enough, that only I heard. I rested my forehead against his and whispered back.

"And I love you."

Yes, life was good.

I had always felt stupid in dresses. Jessica and Angela both dragged me dress shopping, saying that grad was one of the biggest days of my life, besides my wedding. It was also one of the biggest days for pictures, hair makeup, primping, dresses, more primping, and…ugh…dancing. I shuddered.

Dress shopping was probably one of the most traumatizing experiences of my life. I stood helpless in the little dressing room as dozens of dresses in all shapes, sizes and colors were flung over the door by Angela and Jessica. I finally got the courage to tell them they needed to slow down, and then actually agreed to my choice of a short dress for the night. I finally found the one, that I thought was perfect. It was classy but still had that 'Bella-Rocker' edge that I had in mind. I was surprised to find out that both my girlfriends approved. It was a short and strapless cocktail dress with jewelled embellishments down the center. I have to admit, it was pretty sexy.

We were sitting in Jessica's bedroom all three of us crammed around the mirror she kept sitting on her floor. It was now propped up against the wall and both kept fussing with my makeup.

"What's the point?" I finally blurted out, shooing away Angela's hand. It came dangerously close to my eyes, holding fake eyelashes, "my face will just be hidden behind a mask anyways."

Jessica turned around, mascara brush in hand, "Ya but they can still see your eyes, and your smudgy makeup, Bella just let me help you." I felt like if I said no both girls would have pinned me to the floor and had their way with their brushes.

"Fine," I grumbled, "but hurry up, I think people are supposed to be here soon." Both my friends faces lit up after hearing my submission. "Why are we going through all this trouble anyways, you were the one who told me that told me this day really wasn't a big deal to a lot of people." I asked.

"Exactly Bella," Jessica huffed, "I want to be the one who will give everyone a night they will never forget."

"More like a night no one is going to remember, have you seen how much liquor you have downstairs. You could fill an Olympic swimming pool with it." Angela stated.

It was true, the amount of alcohol everyone had pitched in for was ludicrous. Of course since my father was chief of police, I was supposed to sweet talk him into letting us throw this party. He agreed, only stating that everyone hand over their keys to the police if they were driving, since he didn't want to have to hand out tickets, arrest my classmates, or worse, deal with a tragic death. Of course everyone agreed, and Jessica promised that no one would be driving.

Jessica's place was pretty big, and her yard was even bigger. Tents had been set up everywhere in the yard since not everyone could stay inside.

At about ten o'clock everyone started arriving, and about thirty seconds before that, both my friends had announced that they had finally finished getting ready. Thank god, that only took about three hours.

Jessica had made the party a masquerade theme, only expecting a few people to actually take it seriously, since no one really stuck to themes. I guess since it was grad everyone had a change of heart. All three of us were surprised to see girls draped in silky flowing fabrics; faces covered by elaborate masks, and boys looking mysterious and sexy in their tuxes and 'Phantom-of-the-opera' masks.

"Hey beautiful." came a voice behind me, followed by a pair of muscular arms. I turned around quick enough to see Mike slip pull up his mask, give me a quick wink, and pull it back down over his eyes. "Your mask is awesome, where did you find that?"

I smiled. "Thanks, Ren-I mean my mom was touring Italy earlier this year, she picked this up for me in Venice after I told her about our theme. How did you know it was me?" I asked, laughter in my voice slightly.

"No one else I know walks like a duck on heels. It had to have been you. Plus everyone else here is in ball gowns, I know you wouldn't be caught dead in one."

I punched him lightly in the arm, and he pulled me in for a searing kiss. And then dragged me across the room to grab a few shots off the table. Jessica had gone all out and hired a bartender for the night, who made absolutely killer shots. Here was a chorus of whoops and cheers as he set everyone's shots on fire. I threw my head back and threw the liquid down my throat, only after being warmed that the liquor needed to cool off. I cringed. The shot tasted like cracked pepper, hot sauce, and ass. At least the fire thing was cool.

Limo after limo arrived at the house as Mike grabbed my hand and led to to the dance floor Jessica had created in her living room, pushing all the furniture out of the room. She had really out done herself. Her house looked like a nightclub in Vegas. I spotted my two friends across the room and gave them a quick wave as Mike and I started moving to the house music that was now blaring from the stereo.

This is the best night of my lifeAnd I wish this between you and ICant last foreverLet's make it last foreverLet's make it last foreverLet's make it last foreverLet's make it last for...

I was lost in the beat, I could feel all the alcohol flowing freely through my veins. My body was warm and I could let go for the night, I felt totally free and relaxed. I looked up and saw a stranger staring intently at me from across the room. His eyes were locked on mine, and as I looked into them I swear I saw something familiar in them. It made me sick. I ripped myself free of Mike's grasp and without an explanation I ran to Jessica's private bathroom.

I collapsed on the cold tile in front of the toilet and threw up the contents of my stomach. My friends and Mike were quick to enter the room behind me. Mike clutched a glass of water. They all gave me a sympathetic look and I greedily took the water from Mike gulping it down as fast as I could.

Breath Bella, I prompted myself, it cant be him. He's been gone for two years.

"Bella are you okay?" Angela asked, pulling the mask of my face.

"Ya, thanks guys, I guess I've just had a little too much to drink I guess. I think the party is over for me tonight." I smiled up at her, hoping she would buy my lie. She obviously did. She took me to the guest bedroom, that I had dibs on for the night and I pulled myself under the covers. She opened the window for me and told me to feel better. Mike stayed with me for a little bit. Wrapping his arms around me and whispering me to sleep. I forgot about the boy on the dance floor while he was there, it was just me and him. I must have fallen asleep. When I woke up I was alone and the only thing I heard was the thumping of the music coming from downstairs. I pulled myself from under the covers and walked to the bathroom, splashing my face with cold water, washing away the light sheen of sweat that coated my forehead. I tugged at the zipper on my dress and oulled it off before getting back into bed.

Suddenly I felt something sink into the bed beside me, thinking it was Mike, I curled up to him as he rubbed my arm up and down.

"I've missed you so much Bella." came a voice. It was not Mike's voice. I knew that voice. It was like velvet, erotic and sexy. I leaped out of bed, but not fast enough. His strong arm pulled me back towards him.

"Edward….no…..it cant be. You don't exist to me anymore." I choked. I couldn't believe this was happening to me, after finally ridding my thoughts of him.

"Don't say that my love, I needed to come back, I haven't been able to live without you." he spoke again, pulling me even closer towards his chiselled body. I wanted to cry and fly form the room, downstairs into Mike's arms. But the part of me that still yearned for him and his touch glued me to this spot of the bed.

We were suddenly all over each other, our lips crashed together, we had not forgotten how to kiss one another. It was like he never left. Arms, and legs were everywhere. We were meshed together in a tangle of limbs. I couldn't get enough of him, we couldn't get enough of each other. There wasn't any part iin my brain that was thinking of Mike, telling me that cheating on him was wrong. There was also no part of my brain that told me Jacob would not like this very much either. All I knew that I was in the arms of Edward and that's where I should be, should have been for the past two years.

When our bodies touched it was like electricity was shooting from his fingertips and traveling through my veins. Our bodies were on fire, we were made for each other. I had given up two years of this, and I wasn't about to let him go this time around. I pulled the jacket off his shoulders, loosened the tie around his neck and pulled it off. Next came his white dress shirt. I let my fingers trail the expanse of his chiselled chest. God I've missed him. Nothing was going to take him away form me this time. Our lips were mashed together again. I felt his arousal pressing against the inside of my thigh. Feeling brave I trailed my fingers down and stroked him through his pants. He moaned. This was the furthest we have ever gone. I quickly unbuttoned them and he pulled them off and threw them to floor.

My thin lace panties were next, although he was not gentle. He discarded the shredded black material onto the floor with the rest of our forgotten clothing. I felt his finger trips slide further and further up my leg until he reached my hot wet core. This was it, if he went any further, it will be the furthest we have ever been in our relationship. He teased me, rubbing th sensitive bundle of nerves before driving two fingers into me, causing me to gasp in pleasure. He pumped in and out, rubbing my clit with his thumb simultaneously. Just as was about to topple over the edge he stopped. I groaned at the loss of contact.

He pulled me down and positioned himself at my entrance, kissing my collar bone lightly before pushing himself into me. It didn't take long for the both of us to find our rhythm. Within a matter of minutes we were both gasping from release.

He didn't stay after that, thinking that if someone found us it would be too difficult to explain the situation. I suddenly felt guilty for what I had done, I cheated on Mike. The man who had glued the pieces of my heart back together after Edward had shattered them. I watched him as he dressed in silence. "When will I see you again." I asked quietly. He leaned down and kissed my temple.

"Soon love, I promise."

And with that he slipped out the door and was gone.

2011

That was nearly four years ago, and I haven't seen him since. I had to suffer the pain of losing him all over again. It eventually drove Mike and I apart, and we broke up. Although he thought it was just us, that we were drifting apart. The break-up was extremely hard on him. Especially after Brooklyn was born.

Brooklyn.

Of course Mike had assumed she was his. We had slept together many times after grad. But I knew better, Brooklyn had Edwards eyes, but only I could see it. I had gotten sick about a month before I graduated, and forgotten that the antibiotics I was prescribed would counteract the effects of birth control. I had conceived my little girl that night with Edward, and she was the best thing that he has ever given me. Mike was so great with her I thought that she was actually his sometimes. But Brooklyn belonged to Edward and no one but me knew. It was killing me. All I want to know is why he didn't come back, like he told me he would.

"Why are you crying mama?" Brooke asked in her sweet voice. It was velvety just like Edwards.

I promised I would take her for ice cream today. She needed all her flu shots, and I know how much she hated them. I told her that if she sat still and was brave, I would buy her, her favourite flavour.

I brushed the escaping tears from my face and smiled at her.

"No reason baby, I'm just so proud of how brave you were today." I told her, cleaning off her sticky fingers. I may have convinced her, But I didn't convince myself.

Okay guys so how do you like chapter one? Just a few quick notes, I do live in Canada, and up here we call our "Prom" grad….so if anyone id wondering that's the answer. Also I posted the link to Bella's dress and mask at the bottom of the page, just remember to add the dots and the slashes! A lot of you are probably wondering why I didn't put Bella and Jake together, and I just have always seen them as best friends and nothing more, so for all of you Bella/Jake lovers, please don't kill me. Please review and send me your thought on what I have written so far, or if there are any grammatical errors, or spelling mistakes. I can never catch my own errors when I go through my work. Reviews are also my motivation to continue writing. If you haven't already feel free to check out my other stories. Xo!