This fills the gap in Cassie's life between her return from Scotland and the evening she smacked Sid

If you like it, please leave a review

I don't own the characters, much as I love them.

Note: Katie is Water Bottle Girl from the Restoration Clinic, NOT Katie Fitch.

Cassie was feeling down. No. That was an understatement. She had just had her heart totally shattered by the one person she truly loved - Sid.

She was sitting on the bed in her best friend, Katie's bedroom sobbing convulsively, with tears streaming down her face. Katie could not get a sensible word out of her, so she gently held her, caressing her shoulders and back until her sobs began to subside. Cassie had run from Sid's house after an awkward encounter with Sid and Michelle, who now appeared to be lovers.

Cassie had met Katie at the Restoration Clinic when she was undergoing treatment for her anorexia. The two girls shared a bedroom at the clinic and became really close friends. In fact, Katie was now Cassie's closest friend. Cassie had spent the last couple of nights at Katie's and went to Sid's house on Sunday morning hoping to meet him when he returned from his camping trip in South Wales. She had hoped to talk to Sid and repair their relationship.

She was waiting in Sid's bedroom when he came back. He entered the bedroom with Michelle and it was plain that the couple were in the process of removing each other's clothes.

"Hello Sid. Hello Michelle." said Cassie.

Sid and Michelle momentarily stopped what they were doing and looked round. Cassie, tears forming in her eyes gave them a look that meant "Oh! I see." and left the room. She ran down the stairs and out of the front door. She just managed to reach the street before she actually started crying.

Six weeks previously, Sid had attempted to initiate a video chat with her and it had gone horribly wrong. What Sid saw on her webcam gave him a totally wrong impression of what she was doing in Scotland. He saw her friend Lachlan apparently stripping her naked. He drew his own conclusions and cut the link. That evening, Sid contacted her again and told her he had seen everything she was doing and he no longer trusted her. She ended the relationship saying that she couldn't talk to Sid. That same evening Sid's father died. He was heartbroken. He travelled to Scotland to sort things out with her, only to find that she wasn't there. On the weekend of Michelle's 18th birthday, much against his better judgement, he went on a camping weekend with the gang in South Wales. On the Saturday evening, he was sitting between two sand dunes, contemplating his situation when Michelle found him. She took advantage of his depressed state and seduced him. On Sunday morning, they returned to Sid's home in Bristol and headed straight up to the bedroom, encountering a shocked Cassie.

And so it was that Cassie was sitting on Katie's bed sobbing convulsively, with tears streaming down her face.

"Oh, Cassie!" said Katie, when she sensed that Cassie had eventually begun to calm down, "What's happened?"

"Ther – There's nothing left for me in life." sobbed Cassie, "I wish I was dead,"

Katie embraced Cassie and spoke softly to her.

"Oh, Cassie." said Katie, gently, "I haven't seen you like this for a long time. You can tell me. What's gone wrong?"

"I, I've – I've lost Sid!" said Cassie, still sobbing, "He's betrayed me with Michelle."

"I thought you'd dumped him." said Katie, "Anyway, you told me you had. He must have believed he'd lost you."

Cassie started crying again. Katie held her gently in the hope that this might console her. After a few minutes, her sobs once again subsided to a level where she was able to speak.

"I know I told him I didn't want to talk to him again." sobbed Cassie, "But I didn't really mean it. I suppose I held off contacting him for too long."

"Why?" asked Katie, gently.

"I suppose I wanted to 'teach him a lesson'." said Cassie, "I even blocked his number so he couldn't call me."

"Look, Cassie," said Katie, "If I was Sid, I would certainly think I had been dumped. Is it surprising he went to the only other girl in his life, especially as she had just ended her relationship with Tony? He's had a crush on Michelle for nine years. He still wants to be loved, Cassie. Incidentally Sid's father died about six weeks ago. That must have been about the time you two 'broke up'."

Cassie gasped. She looked shocked and sad.

"Oh! I didn't know that." said Cassie, "I feel so guilty now. Please tell me that isn't true."

"I'm afraid it is." said Katie, "I was at college the day after. Sid came in, but he was walking round like a living zombie. I asked what had happened. Please don't let what I'm about to tell you make you feel worse. Jal told me he'd lost his girlfriend and his dad on the same evening. Anyway, don't blame yourself for what happened. You weren't to know his dad would die that same evening."

"You were always someone who 'told it like it is'." said Cassie, "But I do feel bad about it. I love Sid a lot, and I thought he loved me, but he's never told me. Now I've lost him."

Cassie started crying again. Katie consoled her.

"Have you ever told him you love him?" asked Katie.

"I don't think I have." said Cassie, "Not directly anyway."

"I get the impression from what you've told me about him that he's somewhat shy." said Katie. "I'm sure he would have responded if you'd told him how you felt about him."

"But it's too late now." said Cassie, "He's gone now, and I don't know how I'm going to get out of this."

Cassie let out another sob and another tear ran down her cheek. Katie once again embraced her, gently caressing her back.

Oh, Katie!" said Cassie, "I know I'm sad, but I feel so secure when I'm with you. You seem to know how to make me feel better."

"I think that's why you came straight to me when you returned from Scotland." said Katie, "You've just had a disappointment, but I don't think you've lost everything. I know that sounds like a cliché, but I think you may be able to get back with Sid. It'll take time, but be patient."

"I suppose you're right." said Cassie resignedly, "You usually are."

Cassie was still near to tears, but was gradually becoming calmer. Katie sensed this and the germ of an idea formed in her mind.

"I've got a suggestion." said Katie, "How do you feel about getting some fresh air?"

"What do you mean?" asked Cassie.

"We're close to Clifton Down here." said Katie, "So we could take a walk on the down, then go into Clifton Village for a coffee. How do feel about that?"

"That's a wonderful idea." said Cassie, almost smiling, "I'd better sort myself out. I must look a wreck."

Cassie spent the next few minutes removing as much of the evidence of her recent tears as she could. Since it was a warm day, Katie collected a couple of bottles of water from the fridge. Cassie put them in her shoulder bag. The two girls then set out to walk the short distance to the Down.

"Where do you want to take me first?" asked Cassie.

"One thing I like doing is walking across the suspension bridge." said Katie, "We could go up to that bit of lawn near the 'Observatory', find a bench and have a chat, then we could walk across the bridge. I love the view."

"That sounds fine." said Cassie, "I love the bridge."

Katie and Cassie emerged onto the Southern part of Clifton Down and walked along Suspension Bridge Road towards the bridge. They climbed up to the 'Observatory'. Before Katie selected a bench, the two girls looked over the wall and enjoyed the view of the Avon Gorge and the bridge.

"We're so lucky to live here." said Katie, "This is such a lovely view."

"It is." said Cassie, "You've been getting to know Bristol while I was in Scotland. You were totally lost when we had our little farewell trip round the city."

"I've got to know the places I like." said Katie, "And this is one I love."

The two girls spent some time contemplating the view before selecting a vacant park bench and sitting down.

"Are you feeling better now?" asked Katie, "You're looking a lot calmer."

"Yes." said Cassie, "I feel comfortable when you're around me. You're so reassuring."

"That's good." said Katie, "I'm so glad I can help you. Anyway, would you like to tell me what happened? I know it will probably bring a few more tears, but we've got to find a way out of this. I don't want you to be pining for your one true love for the rest of your life. That could be a waste of two lives, yours and Sid's."

"I appreciate that." said Cassie, "Where would like me to begin?"

"I suppose, when Sid tried to arrange a video link." said Katie.

"Have you heard of that television programme, 'A queer eye for the straight guy'?" asked Cassie.

"Yes, I have." said Katie, "What has that got to do with anything?"

"When Sid tried to contact me," said Cassie, "I was contemplating paying him a surprise visit. I wanted to wear some sexy underwear when I called on him. I was getting Lachlan's opinion on which bra to wear."

"Who's Lachlan?" asked Katie.

"He was one of my gay flatmates." said Cassie, "He was so gay, he almost made Maxxie look straight. Anyway, to continue. While I was doing this, my laptop beeped. It was Sid. I guess my webcam must have been activated and he could see and hear me. I could neither see nor hear him."

"What were you wearing when you responded?" asked Katie.

"Only this bra, a skimpy pair of panties and an unbuttoned cardigan." said Cassie, "I suppose that must have looked a bit odd. Getting no response from Sid, I went back to what I was doing, not realising that my webcam was working. I sat on the side of Lachlan's bed, took off my cardigan and let him unclip my bra, so I could try the other one."

"That must have looked bad." said Katie, "What happened then?"

"Once I'd changed my bra, I went back to the laptop." said Cassie, "The link had been cut. I just thought Sid had got fed up with waiting. I didn't realise he'd seen everything I was doing. Late that evening, he called me again. This time, the video worked both ways. From what Sid said, it was obvious that he had seen everything Lachlan was doing with me. Sid drew his own conclusions and wouldn't let me explain. He went on to say he no longer trusted me. That really hurt."

Cassie's voice was cracking as she said this and she started to cry again. Katie put her arm across Cassie's shoulders to comfort her.

"I replied that I couldn't speak to him and cut the link." continued Cassie when she had recovered her composure, "I was so angry. I picked up my mobile phone and blocked his number. That night, I cried myself to sleep."

"Oh, Cassie, you always seem to end up hurting the people you love most." said Katie, "I know you went to the Canaries a short time after that, because you sent me a card. I so envied you going back to nature."

"Yes, that was nice." said Cassie, "It did take my mind off Sid for a bit, but at first I was so frightened of being naked where there were other people. I'd just begun to really enjoy it when we had to fly home. I'll tell you all about it some other time."

"Anyway, Cassie," said Katie, "You decided to come and visit Sid anyway. What prompted that?"

"I thought about what happened on that fateful day." said Cassie, "I realised how bad it must have looked to Sid. I still loved him dearly. I wanted to sort things out with him. Unfortunately, it seems he'd already moved on. He can't have loved me all that much."

Cassie's face twisted into a grimace and the tears started flowing again. Katie comforted her once more.

"As I said before," said Katie, "Sid needs to be loved. He now knows you're back in Bristol. That might make him think. I'm sure, deep down, he does still love you, Cassie"

"I hope so." said Cassie, "Is there anything we can do?"

"Give me a little time." said Katie, "I'm just beginning to have an idea. Earlier, you said you felt 'so guilty'. I think we have to make Sid feel 'so guilty' somehow."

"How?" asked Cassie.

"I know that your group of friends, including Sid have started meeting at a new club." said Katie, "I'm in touch with Maxxie. I'll try to find out when they're going there next. The next club night there is this Wednesday. You will have to think hard about what you're going to say to Sid. Does anybody other than Sid and Michelle know you're back?"

"Not as far as I know." said Cassie.

"That's good." said Katie, "Your unexpected appearance in the club should be noticed. Anyway, I think better when I'm walking. Let's walk across that bridge."

Cassie carried out further running repairs to her make-up after the most recent tears. The two girls got up from the bench and made their way down to the bridge. They walked slowly across it holding hands. In the middle, they stopped and looked over the parapet. The River Avon was a narrow stream flowing between muddy banks.

"It's a pity the tide's out." remarked Katie, "It looks so much better when it's in and the river's full."

"Oh, Katie!" said Cassie, "I'm so lucky to have you as a friend."

"What!?" remarked Katie, "What suddenly prompted that remark?"

"But for your soothing words and consoling arms, Katie, I'd probably be down there, dead." said Cassie, "Now, you've given me hope."

"I'm so glad I've helped." said Katie, "You must realise suicide doesn't solve any problems, and you would break a lot of hearts, mine included. A lot of people here love you Cassie. Anyway, let's have no more depressing talk. Don't forget, I love you like a sister. I always have, ever since I first met you. There's something very wonderful about you, and our task today is to begin to get Sid to realise that."

"I suppose so." said Cassie.

Cassie and Katie continued their exploration of the bridge by completing their westbound crossing, crossing the road and walking back to the middle of the bridge. They once again stopped and appreciated the view.

"There's so much happening down there, but it seems so peaceful from up here." said Katie, "Anyway, let's go and have that coffee."

The two girls returned to the Clifton end of the bridge and made their way, hand in hand to Clifton village itself. They were soon both seated in the Clifton Caffè Nero with large lattes.

"Have you had any other thoughts about making Sid feel guilty?" asked Cassie.

"I think you might have to deliberately hurt him." said Katie, "Not necessarily physically, though."

"I don't know whether I could do that." said Cassie, "I don't like hurting people."

"I'm sure you'll find a way." said Katie, "Anyway, don't worry about that for now. Tell me all about the Canaries."

"My folks could tell I was really down." said Cassie, "I hadn't meant to break up with Sid, but I had. They were quite worried about me. They felt that a fortnight away from everything might help, so they quickly booked two weeks at this resort in the Canary Islands, but they didn't tell me everything about it until we got there."

"Why?" asked Katie.

"I suppose they thought I would refuse to go if they told me." said Cassie, "And they would have been right."

"I suppose you're referring to the nude sunbathing." said Katie.

"Yes." said Cassie, "What they hadn't told me was that it was an FKK resort."

"What's that?" asked Katie.

"FKK stands for Freikörperkultur." said Cassie, "It's a German word. It means Free Body Culture. It's the German naturist organisation."

"So?" said Katie.

"It meant that when I went onto the beach, I'd have to strip completely naked." said Cassie, "I was terrified. I'd only been totally naked in my bathroom up to that point."

"Surely, you'd been naked in front of your Scottish flatmates." said Katie, "You said Lachlan stripped you."

"I still had my briefs." said Cassie, "I wasn't completely nude. In any case, I was in a private room with someone I trusted, not outdoors in public."

"Anyway," said Katie, "You were about to tell me what happened on the holiday."

"The first morning, I just stayed in my room for a couple of hours, still crying over Sid." said Cassie, "In the middle of the morning, my mum came back and sat down with me. She had a long talk with me. She can be very persuasive. We could see the beach from the balcony. She got me to look at it. She also told me that I shouldn't be ashamed of any part of my body. She also, somehow, succeeded in persuading me, for the time being, that I did look good naked."

"Did you go out later on?" asked Katie.

"Yes." said Cassie, "My mum took me to the poolside coffee bar. I was dressed in a t-shirt, black rollneck sweater, jeans, boots and a denim jacket. Everybody else was naked. I must have looked really odd."

"Were you embarrassed?" asked Katie.

"Oddly, yes I was." said Cassie, "I never thought I could feel so out of place. After that I did strip off and go on to the beach just before lunch. I felt so vulnerable once I was outside, so fragile. I almost felt as if I would fall to pieces if I wasn't wearing any clothes."

"Oh, Cassie!" said Katie, chuckling, "That's silly. Your legs don't drop off when you go to the bathroom, nor does anything else."

"I know." said Cassie, who also saw the absurd side of what she'd just said, "But it was such a strange feeling being totally naked outdoors and in public."

Katie was pleased to hear Cassie laughing again. She smiled.

"That's more the Cassie I know and love." said Katie, "You're now out on the beach, stark naked. How did things go after that?"

"Strangely, after that morning, I gradually got used to being naked." said Cassie, "At first, I thought that everyone would be looking at me, but they weren't. Since nobody else was wearing anything either, I suppose I merged into the crowd."

"Some people must have noticed you." said Katie.

"A few did." said Cassie, "It was quite nice when I heard people telling my mum how lovely a daughter she had. I didn't think I was even pretty, especially when I was naked."

"Oh, Cassie," said Katie, "I wish I was as lovely as you. Don't keep putting yourself down. You're really beautiful, with or without clothes. You've got a perfect figure and beautiful skin."

"I don't know about that." said Cassie, "Anyway, by the end of the first week, I didn't mind being naked. More people were complimenting me on my figure, particularly when I was picking up a bit of a suntan. It felt good. I started to enjoy myself."

"I guess that's when you sent me the postcard." said Katie.

"Yes." said Cassie "It was. I was actually beginning to feel good about myself. It was wonderful. I so loved the second week that I didn't want to come back home. I'd spent more than a whole happy week in this warm, friendly place and, for a change, thoughts of Sid were a long way from my mind."

"So, overall, once you got used to nudity, did you enjoy it?" said Katie.

"I did." said Cassie, "It was an attitude changing experience. I no longer have any qualms about being naked. It is now a really happy memory."

"That's good." said Katie, "How do you feel now after recalling it?"

"I'm beginning to feel happy again." said Cassie, "You seem to be able to find ways to pull me out of any depression. You're wonderful."

"Well, you should try to keep that feeling, Cassie." said Katie, "You should feel good about yourself all the time. That way we can work out how to deal with Sid."

"Have you had any thoughts about how we might do it?" asked Cassie.

"Well, you've told me that nobody else knows about Sid and Michelle." said Katie, "I think it might be quite entertaining if, when we go to the club, you let that particular cat out of the bag. Then you should talk to Sid."

"What should I say?" asked Cassie.

"I'll leave that up to you." said Katie, "But don't forget, you're trying to make him feel really guilty."

A germ of an idea was forming in Cassie's mind. She would appear in the club with a white dress. That way, she would stand out from the generally dark clothing of the rest of the clubbers. She had not yet decided exactly what she would say to Sid. She would think about that on the evening, but she knew she would have to be firm with him. It would depend on his reaction when she let it be known that he was in a serious relationship with Michelle.

The two girls left the coffee shop and spent the next couple of hours exploring the down.

"Would you like a little peace and quiet?" asked Katie as they returned to the Southern part of Clifton Down.

"What do you mean?" replied Cassie.

"When I really want to think, I sit in the Catholic Cathedral." said Katie, "It's usually very quiet on a Sunday afternoon. It's just down there."

"OK." said Cassie.

Cassie and Katie walked down towards Clifton Catholic cathedral, which is quite near the Down. As Katie had anticipated, the cathedral was quiet. Katie selected a seat between the very colourful baptistry window and the altar. Katie knelt and prayed as Cassie sat beside her. The two girls stayed there silently for about twenty minutes. Cassie was formulating her ideas about what she would say and do on Wednesday evening. Katie prayed silently for her friend's happiness and well being.

As they left the cathedral, Cassie said, "I thought Catholic churches were very decorated places. Apart from the window behind us, that one was almost all plain grey concrete and granite."

"It was different wasn't it." said Katie, "I think the architect felt that there should be fewer distractions from worship. I do know that you can see the Altar from every seat."

The two girls returned to Katie's home and spent the rest of the day trying to develop a strategy for dealing with Sid.

Katie 'happened' to meet Maxxie on Monday afternoon and gleaned the information that, since it was half term, the gang were indeed going to the new club on Wednesday evening.

Since Cassie was staying, with Katie, the two girls had a little more time to plan.


Wednesday evening arrived. Cassie wore a short sleeved white dress with a scoop neckline. There were silver sequins around the waist and neckline. Unusually for her, she put on some sparkly eye make-up.

"You look really amazing." said Katie, "You don't usually wear much eye make-up, but you seem to be quite an expert."

"Do you think anybody will notice me?" asked Cassie.

"Of course they will." said Katie, "Let's hope the first people are Jal or Anwar. Anyway Cassie, I'll stay in the background as moral support."

As Cassie and Katie entered the club, it was evident that something was going on involving Cassie's friends and the singer in the group playing that evening. Jal approached the stage, embraced the lead singer, kissed him passionately and snogged him to the ground. When Jal got back to her feet, she was wearing the singer's hat. Cassie was so astonished that she nearly forgot why she was there. One of the club's bouncers picked Jal up. This caused her to gain a bit of height. She looked across the dance floor and saw Cassie coming in.

"It's Cassie!" announced Jal over the still open microphone.

Maxxie, Anwar, Kenneth and Chris surrounded and hugged Cassie. They were so pleased to see her back in Bristol.

"Too loud!" said Cassie as she escaped from the group hug and approached Sid and Michelle.

"Hi!" said Sid.

"Hi!" said Cassie.

"Hi!" said Michelle.

"Hi!" said Cassie again.

"Hi!" said Sid again, nervously.

"Hi!" said Anwar.

After these 'formalities', Cassie moved closer to Sid and Michelle.

"How was it?" asked Chris.

"It was like..." said Cassie, but tailed off. She paused, then looked Sid straight in the eyes and said: "I want to hear all your gossip. When did you two get together, by the way? By his hospital bed?"

"Eh?" queried Anwar.

Katie stayed nearby, but just out of sight. Cassie now felt confident enough to drop her bombshell.

"Lovely Sid and Lovely Michelle are fucking." announced Cassie. Tony looked on, astonished.

"We're not." responded Sid, "Not in the way you're thinking anyway."

"Don't lie, Sid." said Cassie, smiling, "I know your dad's dead, but - but you can't just go round doing whatever you want."

All through this, Cassie was looking Sid straight in the eyes, making him feel extremely uncomfortable. What she did next astonished everybody. Even Katie wasn't expecting it.

She approached Sid even more closely. The sweet kiss she planted on his cheek couldn't have been any more gentle or tender. She then faced him for about three seconds, still looking straight into his eyes. Then, like lightning, she slapped the cheek she'd just kissed - really hard - turned away and walked back to Katie. As she walked back, second thoughts were forming in her mind. 'Have I done the right thing? Will it have the desired effect? Will Sid feel guilty or have I driven him right out of my life?'

When she reached Katie, these doubts overcame her, she embraced her friend and burst into tears. The two girls left the club and headed for Katie's home.

"I think I've just really hurt him." sobbed Cassie, "Tha - that's something I didn't want to do. I still love him so much."

Cassie started to cry again

"Don't cry, Cassie." said Katie in an attempt to pacify Cassie's emotions, "I think you did very well. I think you did everything you could. It'll take time, but I think Sid will eventually realise that you still love him."

"You really think so after what I've just done to him?" asked Cassie.

"Yes." said Katie, "I saw the look on Sid's face after you hit him. I think you did enough to make him think about his situation."

"I really hope so." said Cassie in a somewhat tremulous voice.

"All you need to do now is to let time do its work." said Katie, "You've sown the seed. Hopefully, in a few weeks, you'll reap the harvest and Sid will show his love for you. I'm sure that he will want to find a way back to you. Hopefully, he will get some help."

Cassie stayed with Katie until Chris found somewhere to live. She then moved in with him so she could be closer to what was going on in her circle of friends.

After the incident in the club, Sid no longer felt entirely comfortable making love to Michelle. Cassie had achieved her aim, to make Sid feel guilty about his relationship with Michelle. Cassie, meanwhile had turned to prostitution. This rather risky behaviour served the dual purpose of earning some money and sending a signal to Sid that 'I am sexually desirable'. In due course, Tony recovered and, eventually, with Effy's help, reclaimed his girlfriend. Effy also helped Sid get back with Cassie. She did this by making Sid jealous and angry enough to actually confront Cassie about her behaviour.

Sid ran all the way to Chris's flat, where Cassie was living, and confronted her about her recent immoral behaviour. He entered in a really angry mood, but he had reckoned without Cassie's principal weapon, her wonderful eyes. She used them to great effect during the confrontation. It only took fifty six seconds for her eyes to reduce Sid from a blazing fury to a quivering tearful wreck. When Sid's anger had subsided, he confessed to her about his relationship with Michelle. He admitted that he had had 'great sex for three days, guilty sex for the rest'. When Cassie heard this, she realised that her slap had had exactly the desired effect. She forgave him and showed him her love. She, at last felt justified, and relieved. The confrontation had cleared the air between them and set their relationship back on track. They declared their total love for each other. It goes without saying that Sid forgave Cassie for everything. He did love her deeply after all. Sid never again betrayed Cassie's love. He realised that she was the one person with whom he wanted to share his life.

Once they had come back together, Sid and Cassie existed in a state of blissful happiness until the death of Chris a couple of weeks before the 'A' level results were announced. Sid was devastated by Cassie's sudden disappearance. Yet again, circumstances beyond the control of this sweet couple had brutally ripped them apart.