just a quick, angsty future!fic that popped into my head. very, very loosely inspired by the movie 'brothers'.
i hope you guys enjoy it!
When Finn Hudson finds her she's a mess. Sure, she's had her moments where her diva antics lead to similiar positons; her in a puddle on the floor with tears streaming down her cheeks, eyeliner that she should get a refund because it is obviously not waterproof, and her tiny form can't stop shivering. This time it feels justified. This time, Finn feels like he could (should) be on the floor next to her and shed a few tears of his own because this girl? Looking so broken and lost? Yeah, it's a little hard to watch.
His large hand settles on her spine. Beneath the material of the dress he can feel her sobs, every breath she forces herself to take. There's the occasional word uttered from her lips, spilled without a thought or any sense of coherency and he doesn't know what's more surprising; the events that led to this evening or the fact that Rachel Berry is absolutely speechless. All of the words she had studied for SATs, for college, for plays, they've all failed her now and she's left without her armor, defenses gone.
Finn's jaw is clenched so tight. Never in his life has he been able to deal with girls when they cried. Quinn cried and she gained his forgiveness. His mom cried and he managed to come home from every trip the Marines sent him on. And when Rachel cried? He swears he'd go to the end of the earth to utterly obliterate whoever did this.
Trouble is, he knows who the culprit is. Fuck, Finn even knows where he can be found. What's stopping him from grabbing the guy and going all Braveheart?
It's his goddamn best friend Noah Puckerman. Their friendship managed to survive one fight over a girl (well, several fights, but only one violent one) could he start another? As Rachel lifts her head and buries herself against him, shakes his body with her violent sobs, he's quite sure that yeah, he could start another.
But the jackass is in prison. A few years ago and this just wouldn't be surprising because it's not like Puck wasn't known for his delinquincy but a few years with Rachel in New York seemed to have straightened him out. For awhile there it seemed he was headed in the right direction.
"I'm so sorry," Finn can only mumble into her hair, mindful of the pins and clips that decorate the chocolate tresses in their current up-do. She had looked so beautiful and now this?
Rachel is trying to string enough words together to show that she's still sane, still Rachel goddamn Berry but it is just impossible because she doesn't think that her brain can function without her heart and right now that traitor is in a million tiny, absolutely miniscule pieces.
It really doesn't help that when she tries to stand she trips on the dress, the train, and all that lace Kurt insisted on sewing into this. Both her arms slip from around Finn and while she sniffles and cries she manages to work the zipper down.
The male watches for a long moment before he reaches around to held her shimmy out of it, and when she's standing there in her white slip with the dress on the floor he takes her up in his arms once more and whispers all the words that he's heard, never before used.
And he means them, every single one. He's going to be there from the start of this to the very end, he's not going to leave her like he did, and yes, she still looks wonderful and sure, she can stay at his place for the next few days.
All Finn can do is breathe and try not to think about any of it. And all Rachel can do is stare blankly.
Those few days? Yeah, turns out she really meant she was going to stay there permenately. Not that Finn is complaining. As those days turned to weeks and eventually months, they're coming up on their one year anniversary. On that night they're out for dinner at a run-down chinese restaurant that they both love and she's actually smiling even with her eyes and he's just so happy to see that, so caught in the moment that he leans in and steals a kiss. One that she actually responds to.
They don't bring up her almost-wedding or the almost-groom that is still in prison. They don't talk about visiting or about anything that's too important.
This, whatever this thing is, is easy. Rachel enjoys that about Finn. How could she not? He's so easy to be with. There's no fighting, no worry about getting hurt, and he's so utterly safe. After all this, after all of that, she's content with safe.
Sure, there are some nights when she reflects, when she wishes, when she's so sure that she's going to wake up and he will be there but when she sees the tanned arm of Finn wrapped around her waist and feels their height differences, their absolute inability to fit, her heart breaks a little.
It takes another three months for her to get past that, for her to settle in a routine that actually makes some sense. She hasn't returned to the stage yet. Instead she spends the majority of her time at a building that Finn bought for her awhile back and they're gutting it to turn it into a dance studio that is already promising because hello, it's Rachel Berry's and she's got the Midas Touch. She turns everything into gold, into good.
Well, almost everything. It obviously didn't work on that one guy but they're not going to mention that. This balance is delicate but it works. They're happy.
So happy that it leads to a child. A little girl with the brightest eyes and a tuff of dark hair that goes down the middle of her head and looks so much like his hairstyle that Rachel has to take her from the nurse and soothe those curls so they're tamed, laying flat and longer so that it's no longer his.
They name her Jude. She's so small and energetic that chasing it's all Finn can do to keep up with her. When Jude and Rachel are together the poor guy is certain that they've got energy to power all of New York for an entire week.
When he watches his two girls together there's this feeling in his chest. He's so happy, so proud of what they have created together, and when she looks at him? Her eyes are sparkling with love and not that sadness that haunted her for so long.
Together, they're a family. And since it is Rachel Berry she plans their outings while trying to accomodate all of their likes so that's how they end up at the local ballgame despite her inability to understand (or even try) baseball.
Finn loves it. He has that childish smile on his face that Jude has perfected and he's teaching their little girl how and when to cheer which Rachel joins in on, as loud as possible. This day has been nothing but fun like every day since Jude's birth. Like every night Rachel is so grateful because when she was drowning, unable to find her way, Finn was right there alongside her. Some days he might have had to drag her kicking and screaming but as she looks at the two of them it was so worth it.
Those days are perfection which is why Rachel is having such a hard time understanding what Finn is telling her as they sit in their bed, enjoying the quiet that they have while Jude naps.
"Baby, I'm sorry but this is my job."
Rachel can understand that, "but I thought you said that you were stationed here? It's why we moved here in the first place because this is your base, right?"
For the last year and a half they've been living in Kentucky at the Ft. Knox base, raising a family and planning to add more when things seem to become more settled, when Jude turned five and could better react to the addition. That was just a few months away and now she gets this? This news is not exactly helping the settling part.
"I know and that's what I thought too but apparently the earth doesn't follow your rules, Rach. There was an earthquake in Haiti and we're being asked to help. This country ... it needs it Rach. You know it does."
Despite all her efforts she's still such a selfish creature and she just doesn't want him to go, to leave, even if it was to help the deprived country. And yes, they need him more than she does and she knows he'll be back soon enough because really, how long does it take to pick up after an earthquake?
So she doesn't cry or whine or any of the other things Finn had expected, prepared a speech for. Instead she nods slowly. "Okay, I understand."
Finn is so relieved to hear that that he reaches across the comforter and finds her hand, squeezes gently. "Thank you Rach, for being so supportive. I couldn't do any of this without you." He gives her one of those charming smiles that she can't help but respond to with a smile of her own. "Do you ... it's going to be hard staying here with Jude so I thought that you might want to go home for my visit. I talked to my mom and she'll be happy to let you stay there with her. I think she gets lonely since Burt's at the garage so much."
Rachel is relieved to hear that suggestion because she didn't want to stay here. It was fine when she was with Finn because she had a partner to spend her days with but if he's going to leave her then... yeah, she'd rather be home.
"I'm sure my dads would just love seeing Jude again. They're always saying that picture aren't enough!"
This appears to be the silver lining in the dreary situation and she is so glad that he thought of her, of her wants in all this, to arrange a living arrangement for her and their daughter. She slides closer to him and he watches, opens his arms and takes her in as he has done countless times before.
"I'll be back before you know it," he promises with a kiss to the temple as though it sealed their verbal contract.
Those are the words that she repeats to herself every single night for the next three weeks. His kiss is what she feels every time Jude looks up at her with round eyes and says, "Mommy, where's Daddy? Is he coming home yet?"
And yeah, Carole and Burt are great and seeing her dads has been wonderful but she wants Finn to come home. Now. Especially since it's harder to fall asleep in the empty bed in his old room and every time she turns on the T.V. the damage is all she hears about while they predict that tremors are still runing the place.
It's an uphill battle, if you ask her, but he doesn't and when he calls her (whenever he possibly can) he's just so tired and she's distracted by raising Jude alone that he is starting to think along the same lines as her without a word being said.
Rachel and Jude have been in Lima for two months now and they've managed to avoid being spotted by anyone she recgonized that would actually engage in a conversation. It figures it would be the damned grocery store where she runs into him.
It just figures that he would still be so good-looking it's frustrating.
It doesn't help that Jude is watching him because her mom is staring and she's curious. What does the little girl go and say? "Mommy, he looks like a movie star!"
Jude is so excited because she is convinced that he is a movie star and maybe he can introduce her to Dora the explorer since they're bound to be best friends.
Of course, all this ruckus pulls his attention away from the fresh fruits he had been admiring and towards the pair. The little girl in the cart is bouncing and it causes him to smirk. Yeah, he's such a stud that even children can recgonize his greatness. That's right little girl, look up to him. He's a fucking star.
Puck as to admit though that the kid is cute. See, she has these brown curls that look like that little girl from decades back that started singing about animal crackers and soup. And her eyes are so big - fucking Disney character eyes, seriously. Not to mention all that excitement in such a small package. It reminds him of -
He looks up and spots her mother and it's her and suddenly he wants to be out of there. Like, we're talking he wants to be gone faster than he is when one of his lady friends starts getting clingy or their husband walks in. That's how badly he wants to be anywhere (even with the aforementioned clingy whores and shotgun-toting husbands) than right here, right now.
Jude is looking between the two of them and trying to process their expressions. "Mommy, do you know him? Does he know Dora?"
Even if she wanted to reply to that she couldn't because she didn't know how to answer that, any of this. Her head shakes, her hands shake, and she takes in a deep breath. She is Rachel goddamn Berry and if she could survive High School she could survive him.
"Yeah, I know your mommy and yeah, I know Dora. She's a pretty cool girl, huh?" He has a sister that grew up on that shit too, okay? That's how he knows who Dora is. Not like he actually volunteered to watch the cartoon. He was just too tired and irritable to fight with her for the remote in the mornings, honest.
Rachel watches as Jude grins, flaunts her dimples and charm. "Hola! She taught me how to say that. I can speak spanglish!"
Puck can't help but laugh because he's not entirely sure what spanglish is to this girl but he's certain that it's not the message Dora was trying to deliver. Either way, he's entertained and if he keeps this shit on the light end of things than he'll be able to look at Rachel and not like, die.
Right?
Wrong.
Because now he's looking at her again and she's pale, her lips are pursed and she looks so livid that he is actually fearful for his life. Legit.
Not that he really blames her because hell, he did kind of get arrested on their wedding day. He left her in a white dress with an audience of a hundred people or so to witness her heartbreak. Looks like she moved on though, if that kid is anything to judge it by. Who's the father? Does he have a right to ask?
No. Not really. But if she would just let him explain ... By the time he got out he was gone and her dads? Yeah, they're not exactly the forgiving or sympathetic type. No, they're more of the went-out-and-bought-a-gun-for-this-moment type which is fucking scary.
So maybe Puck got the best of her a few years ago. And yeah, he's pretty much the only person to ever do that because, again she must make mention of this, she's Rachel Berry and no one does that. He's not going to do it again. So with her chin lifted and her face as clear of any emotional attatchments she nods, "Hello." She doesn't say a name. Doesn't know what to call him. Noah seems wrong, Puck never sounded right from her lips, and Mother-Fucking-Cock-Sucking-Assface seemed a little inapproriate in front of a child. Even if they summed up her feelings pretty accurately.
Deep in his gut he has a reaction to this and that's alarming because he's done reacting to her. Got that, anatomy? He's done, so stop responding. But his throat apparently doesn't get the message because his voice cracks - fucking cracks! - when he tries to respond. "Hey Rac-" it cracks, he curses under his breath and clears his throat. "Hey."
Now, this isn't awkward at all. Nope, not at all. It's not like she'd be running as fast as she could in the other direction if she thought she could carry Jude and make it out alive in those heels. Why was she cursed with good shoe sense? Why hadn't she just passed them up at the mall?
Jude doesn't really like the feeling she gets from all of this and even though she doesn't understand it she's trying to ease whatever this is. "My Daddy will be home soon!"
Puck blinks, turns to look back at her and frowns. "Where is your daddy?"
Should he be asking questions like these? Probably not but Jude's all too happy to engage in conversation which is refreshing when compared to Rachel's stern face and clenched jaw.
"In ... uhh... that earthquake place."
"Haiti?" Puck asks and raises his eyebrow in a move that has become trademarked, he swears. Only this time it's a genuine show of confusion, determination to understand. He looks between Rachel and Jude then. There's something about this, something that he knows, he can figure it out.
"Yeah! That place. He has to wear his uniform over there and Daddy doesn't like it. But everyone else does! They're always thanking him and stuff. Or they did in Ken'ucky. They don't do it here because they know him. That's what Mommy says."
Oh motherfucker. Finn Hudson! Puck should have known. That little girl has that easy nature and appealing smile and those goddamn dimples! Of course that bastard swooped in, his goddamn suit of armor or army uniform or what-the-fuck-ever.
Rachel can tell he's put the pieces together because he's suddenly so stiff and when he exhales it's long and low and somewhat frightening. There's the smallest, coldest part of her that rejoices in seeing him like this, in causing this pain, but the majority is too tired to deal with this. Who knew running into an ex could be so exhausting?
It takes Puck a few cleansing breaths before he is able to nod, plaster on a fake smile that's for Jude's sake more than his. "He sounds like a good guy." And that shit? That's classic Puck right there- he can lie straight through his teeth to appease the fairer gender. "I've gotta go Squirt."
"Say hi to Dora for me!"
He wants to laugh because she's so cute, so perfect, and so much like her mother that he's completely under her spell but there's also that need to punch things and cry like a little pussy so he's leaving now before this girl can drag him further into her sorcery. "Will do." he says with a two fingered wave over his shoulder, the fruits abandoned in favor of getting the fuck out like he should have done earlier.
It's the first night that Rachel leaves Jude with her dads. Instead of staying in she goes out and indulges in the nightlife of Lima which is admittedly limited but after a few shots she doesn't even realize how small this town is. In fact, this tavern is suddenly looking like New York because it's so expansive and everything is sparkling.
She watches as her bartender (they've become best friends, she feels) is whispering to some guy with his back to her, apron being tied around his waist. She is the subject of their conversation if the looks back at her are anything to go by. The guy, who has really lovely arms she's not ashamed to admit, still has his back to her but he's nodding with whatever her bartender is saying.
"Goodnight Rach. Be sure and call someone to pick your cute little ass up."
And suddenly her bartender, her best friend, is out from behind the counter and leaving. Is his shift over already? How long has she been here?
Four shots and three beers ago. Where's the clock that keeps track of that and would there be a cuckoo bird in it...?
Apparently her musings were said aloud because a husky chuckle drags her out of her mind and back to the counter, into the musk of the bar and the rattle of bottles and glasses and jukebox speakers.
"What are you drinking?"
Oh fuck. Even wasted, absolutely blitzed out of her skull, she just knows who that voice belongs to. Of course. Of all the (two) bars she could have chose she had to choose this one. It's far from ladylike but she groans and sags on the seat, elbows flanked on the bar to keep her somewhat upright or at the very least, keep her on the stool.
"Water," he says simply enough because her eyes are glazed and she has yet to yell at him which is just one of the many signs that shows how far gone she really is. Does their encounter lead to this?
He's going to say yes because he has an ego that's quite large and he can back it up, thankyouverymuch.
Rachel watches with narrowed eyes and labored breathing because she's always been a ... well, a handsy drunk to put it lightly and him here? Like this? It's a reminder of the first time she got drunk and the night that followed after.
Let's just say she woke up with the biggest smile and he fucking strutted down the halls the next day, worse than usual... and that's after they showed up fifteen minutes late (another first) because of the pit-stop they made in his truck (another first, dammit).
That first drink of water is enough to allow her to speak, to which she could only murmur a meek "thanks".
Puck is trying his best to remain smug and whatnot because if he keeps standing there, looking like an absolute whipped puppy he's going to lose tips. No one wants to tip a sad bartender. Worse than that, he's going to lose his appeal to the ladies and he refuses to give up sex for Rachel Berry again (a first for him).
So he's formed a plan. He's going to keep his distance from this girl - this poison. Yeah, it's little hard to do when she is at his place of work, signaling him for drinks and napkins and eventually chips. And it's especially hard to do when it's near closing time and she doesn't want to call someone to pick her up because god forbid anyone see her for the drunken mess she is. They'd know she wasn't perfect then.
"I'll give you a ride home when I'm done." the fuck? How is that going to help him further his plan? It's not but the words just tumbled out and for one agonizing second she looks like she's going to smile and then he will really be fucked but goddamn, her smile. So amazing.
But she doesn't so he can breathe and instead she presses her lips together and just nods.
It's an hour later before they're walking (well he is, she's stumbling and refuses to let him help) out to his truck. He's bribed one of his coworkers to do his closing duties so he can get out of there earlier. It's four in the morning and all he wants to do is get her home and out of his life (again. not a first for either of them).
But that's when she realizes she doesn't have her keys and she's too afraid to ring the doorbell. By this point Puck is more than a little convinced that this girl is trying to piss him off. If she wasn't so drunk he'd probably just leave her on the doorstep with a bow on her goddamn head so someone else could take this 'gift' off his hands.
He's trying his best to stifle another curse and think about what to do with her. He's convinced that taking her to his place is all around a bad idea because not only is that place his pad, where girls don't go, but when she sobers up and realizes that it's his she's going to freak the fuck out and he doesn't want his stuff damaged.
That's how they end up in the deserted parking lot of the 7-11 where the vast majority of his youth was spent. It's there that she's just drunk enough, just clear-headed enough to whisper, "Why'd you do it?"
How many times did that question plague her as she tried re-building her life with Finn? Was it something she did? Was he just scared in the end? Did he ever really want to do this?
Honestly, he was hoping to avoid having this conversation. Ever. It haunted his nightmares almost every single night and this? This shit was no nightmare and surprisingly he wishes it was just so it wouldn't be real, just so he could wake up. But then she gives a quiet, tiny sniffle and he can sense the tears before he actually sees them.
Fuck. Wake up wakeupwakeup.
"It was because of my dad," he says so softly that Rachel is forced to lean towards him. She has to hear this, has to know. Maybe then that will ease the ache, the feeling that something is still so wrong despite her life being so perfect. "He was in a bad spot. I couldn't say no and I knew it was crazy and yeah, I know it's all fucked up but it was my dad Rach. We've both fucked up plenty, me and him, but after mom died? We \reconnected. We had to, for the sake of Maddy." Puck inhales and runs a hand over his shaved head. It hurts to think about his mom or his sister, Madison. "He was going to do it with or without me but I thought that maybe he would have more of a chance if I helped, you know? That maybe he'd be smart enough to pull this off but he's no good Rach. He's a goddamn bastard. He left me again and I took the fall for all his shit. All of it. What could I do? He's the reason I'm here." a bitter laugh as he reflects on that, "he's the reason I'm so fucked up right now. I can't get my shit together. Maddy doesn't want to see me because she doesn't understand why everyone is saying her brother is a fucking thief. Guess I can't really blame her for that."
Now she's crying for some other reason that he can't really understand because a crying Rachel is a makes-no-sense Rachel. He really doesn't know what to do now. Years ago and he would have her wrapped against him so fast and her tears would be gone in seconds.
But those seconds stretch into minutes and he doesn't know what to say, how to ease any of this. It's all so fucked. He really shouldn't be surprised that she's not speaking to him, that she hasn't. Hurts all the same though.
"It wasn't because you didn't love me?" Her voice quavers as the inquiry is posed.
Puck reaches for then and pulls her to him, across the worn leather of his truck and tight against him. He doesn't even care if this is going to piss her off because frankly? That question broke what little shards of a heart he still had.
"What the fuck? Don't you dare ask stupid questions like that. Aren't Jews supposed to be smart? Fuck." He's breathing hard and he doesn't know if she can even breathe because he's holding her so goddamn tight. "I loved you. I meant it every time I said that, every single god damn time. You were my life. I fucked it up, baby but it had nothing to do with you. It was never your fault. Shit, I'm such a fuck up. Rach, baby, you are fucking perfect and wonderful and so goddamn beautiful and I'm an idiot. Fuck, I wish I knew some of your SAT words here to express how much of a goddamn moron I am. I fucking love you, okay? What I did is beyond fucking repair but it didn't change how I felt, how I feel now."
She's drunk and crying and so emotional. She didn't even cry this hard when Finn left or any of the nights she was alone. Big shocker that the last time she was so torn, so heartbroken, it was a result of this guy. He's so close and all she can think is how well they fit together, that he's able to settle against her smaller frame without hesitation.
They're the right pieces and for so long they've been working on this same puzzle in the wrong spots. It's with that in mind that she tilts her tear-stained face upwards and seeks out his lips, his touch, the stubble on his chin.
And when they fuck in front of the 7-11? It's not a first.
It is the first time that she doesn't answer when Finn calls from Haiti and all he can do is leave a worried voicemail and the promise he'll call back soon to check on her, his love being sent to both of his girls.
Trouble is, after that night in Noah's truck, she doesn't really feel like Finn's girl anymore.
This is so wrong. Jude and Rachel are over at Noah's apartment and they're watching some crappy movie. His arm is tossed on the back of the couch and Jude is cross-legged on the floor in front of him with a coloring book. This has been the standard for the last few weeks or so.
Rachel is off in the kitchen and she's singing which he hasn't heard in so long. Jude has her head cocked to the side, straining to listen. "Is that my Mommy?"
Puck can only nod because fuck yeah, that's her mommy. Doesn't she know how great Rachel is at this?
"I've never heard her sing. She doesn't sing at home." Jude says simply before reaching for a yellow crayon because hello, clouds are yellow.
"I'm going to see if she needs anything. Yell if you need me." Puck mentions as he stands, watches Jude nod absently in agreement because she's too focused. He walks into the kitchen and remains leaned against the counter, watching Rachel before he remarks, "You don't sing anymore?"
Rachel pops the pizza in the oven and levels a look on him. They've spent hours, days, and now weeks talking and repairing and building this friendship (or whatever it was) but she doesn't know how to talk about her past or her future (or whatever it was) with Finn. Funny how she can't define either of her relationships even though they clearly should be.
"I didn't really have a whole lot of reasons to," Rachel admits, looking a bit glum. Yeah, Jude and Finn were great, they were wonderful and she loved them both so much but she had lost her inspiration to be a star, to wow anyone with her voice when she lost him.
All of that goes without being said but he's always been so good at reading her so he pulls her close, steals the warmth she has naturally from being such an energetic person and keeps her for an extended, stolen moment of time.
"We'll give you more reasons. So many goddamn reasons that you'll never stop singing."
The way he says it? So casual and nonchalant as though this was a real relationship makes her heart break a little but it doesn't stop her from smiling, grinning really, and he's momentairly stunned. This Rachel is so goddamn amazing.
"Thanks Noah," she whispers and starts to pull away so that Jude wouldn't get the wrong impression if she happened to walk in on one of their moments.
They put Jude down for a nap a little while after that and it should have been a quiet, peaceful hour or so but instead it is filled with her moans and his gasps and the sound of a love being re-erected from the shambles they had left it in.
It's two days after that - just two days later that she's watching the latest reports on CNN and she gets the news. There's been another horrible quake and the damage done is off the charts. So many casualities have been claimed including several U.S. soldiers.
Her heart sputters and she's convinced that it stops because the only thing she can think of is Finn being under one of those buildings. It takes a three attempts before the air actually reaches her lungs, before she can function and when she can it's to call Noah and inform him of what she just witnessed.
He's groggy and half-asleep because he didn't come home until almost 7 that morning and now it's only ten but he agrees to come over and he's there for her, hand held tightly as they spend the rest of the morning watching CNN and the phone. Every time it rings she's startled, grateful that her dads took Jude to the park that morning, and before she knows it there's tears because she is just so scared and she's been an absolutely horrible partner to him. She's been sleeping with Noah and letting him raise Jude, more or less. This couldn't be worse.
But the day goes by and the call never comes and they both fall asleep on the couch. Her dads don't even bother them (even if both wanted to get a gun and nip this in the bud, early) and they just take Jude out for ice cream. They've heard about the events and they know where Finn is stationed, what Rachel is thinking.
It's after eleven and everyone is asleep and Noah's at work when she finally gets that call and she's so relieved to hear Finn's voice that she tells him she has missed him, so so soso much. She can't even articulate properly what has been going through her mind.
But he can sense there's something else, something she hasn't said. It's been months, closing on a year since he was there to hold her. Everytime he tried to take leave, to come back, mother nature threw that trip out the window. It's so frustrating and what's even worse is that when Jude takes the phone after being woke up, she mumbles something that sounds like, 'Noah?'.
Finn doesn't know how to react to that and he coos goodnight to his daughter, promises to see her soon, and spends the next half hour talking to Rachel about nonsense until he finally just comes out and says it.
"Puck's in Lima still, isn't he?"
They've been dancing around this but now his voice is soft. She doesn't know what to say and that silence? It speaks volumes.
"Rach... I love you." is what he's finally able to come up with and again, she doesn't know what to say because she knows that she loves him. She does. He has been her best friend, her saviour, and he's so goddamn nice and sweet. "And I know you love me. I need you to remember that. I'll be home soon for you and our daughter. Will you wait for me?"
Her eyes are closed because there's tears brimming behind her lids and she doesn't know what to say which only makes him sigh. She hasn't been very good at waiting this past year. Under normal circumstances this would make him livid but it's Puck. Worse, it's Puck and Rachel and he really doesn't know why he expects better out of any of them, especially together.
"I-... I'm pregnant." she blurts out finally.
This was not the way to tell him, to explain to him that while he was out fighting the good fight she was doing the opposite.
"It's not mine," he says in that low voice of his and it almost cracks because he's near his breaking point, he's so damned close. All he wants to do is be home with her and with Jude and without Puck. He wants all of this to go away because it's out of control, out of his hands.
Her reply is a soft, whispered "I'm sorry" but that doesn't do him any good because this has just effectively ended their strained relationship. He should have known this day was coming but he doesn't know what to say. He loves Rachel, how could he not? She's nearly everything he's ever wanted and what she wasn't - Jude was. And now his girls aren't really his anymore.
"Jude is ours, Finn. You and I. She's your little girl too. You know that, you're always welcome to her. You're her father. When you get home we'll make this ... work out."
Truthfully, he wants to yell and claw and just break down because this is beyond the worst news he's ever heard in his life but then Rachel starts crying. Those tears - those fucking tears are what started this and he finds himself agreeing, promising that things will work out because it's Rachel goddamn Berry and for her he'd go to the ends of the earth, they've established this.
Now it's just a little bit easier to breathe.
Relief doesn't really come until Puck learns the truth and spends the entire night singing to her stomach.
It's gone the next day when her dads find out and they are less than enthused to put that shit lightly. She and Jude stay at Puck's for the next few days.
She's six months pregnant when Finn fnally, finally gets home. He's so tanned and his muscles are so defined. Not to mention he's tall and impossible to miss but his recent improvements have earned him the stares of quite a few people. They mostly turn to jealousy when he scoops up Rachel in one arm and Jude in the other, spins them around the airport while laughing.
They've been talking almost every day for the last few months and they're honest to gosh friends, as they always were, and there was no pressure or tension. Not even when Rachel asked him to be the godparent of the little boy in her stomach which he accepts.
Finn even finds a way to get along with Puck even if he spent the next three months of Rach's pregnancy avoiding the guy. When they're all assembled in the hospital it's impossible not to talk to him. When the baby is born and the news is announced by Puck who stands there proud, covered in the typical baby fluids that Finn had once on his scrubs, Finn gives him a tight hug. He's so proud.
Landon Eli Puckerman is a beautiful specimen and Jude remains the ever-doting sister. She doesn't understand the situation but since her mom has two dads, she thinks it's okay that she does too.
Their baby is two when Rachel starts down the aisle in white once more and this time there's two guys at the end who both love her in different ways, have saved her in just as many. And when she says 'I do' and seals her vows with a kiss, everything seems to fall into place.
Puck and Rachel finally got their wedding that was years (and years) in the making and they've almost managed to convince her dads to put down the shotguns.
... almost.