THE SEARCH FOR THE LOST ALBINO
Hello, everyone!! This is the sequel to my story "Far Far Away". This plotline was conceived when the demented ideas of hippy.intellect and myself got together and made hot, steamy love in a bed of fan fiction, haikus, RENT and finger sandwiches and henceforth, gave birth to this story in 9 minutes, about Mark and Roger and the painful separation they have to endure before they can finally see each other again. Co-starring all your favourite characters from the prequel.
Once upon a time, in a magical land called Far Far Away – yes, the same Far Far Away as featured in the story's prequel Far Far Away – there sat a sad, angsty, depressed rock star by the name of Roger Davis, who was sitting on the ancient couch of his loft, clutching a pink cushion and crying endlessly. Well technically, he was crying because his secret lover Mark was zapped to Morocco by Benny, the Witch of Cyberland, but come on!! When is he ever not sad, angsty or depressed?? It's almost like it's programmed into his DNA or something. Anyway, Roger clutched tightly onto this cushion for no particular reason, even though it had no connection to Mark whatsoever. Frodo Baggins, who now shared the loft with Roger and was paying his share of the rent in gold coins and slave girls, looked sadly at Roger from the kitchen.
"Oh my fair Roger," he said wistfully. "What is it that ails you?"
Roger looked at him with teary eyes. "I miss my Marky!!!!" he wiped his eyes furiously. "And since when did you start speaking normal English sentences?" he said, blinking.
Frodo smiled. "When Benny waved his magic wand and sent Mark to Morocco, one of the sparks flew down my throat and cured me of my boring Lord of the Rings speech. Here, I made you some magical peanut buttered tea," he said, bringing Roger a cup filled with something that looked like liquid baby poop. Roger looked at it curiously, then picked it up and sipped it. It tasted surprisingly good.
Unfortunately, Roger was allergic to peanuts.
And he didn't realise it until suddenly, his nose grew so long so quickly that it knocked the tea cup out of his hand. Roger shrieked and tried to clamp his hands over his nose to stop it growing, but alas, it was no use. His nose grew and grew until it became as long as an elephant trunk. Roger sighed.
"Oh, how am I going to find Mark again with this ugly nose that looks like a hose!!" he wailed.
"Hey, that rhymes!!" said Rob, who suddenly walked into the living room, looking like a proper rubber chicken this time.
"Shut up, Rob!!" yelled Roger through his angry tears. "That's not important!! Frodo, I need you to do whatever magic you can to get rid of this nose and then I want you to help me pick out a gorgeous top that'll go with my new orange plaid pants. Got that?"
Frodo suddenly looked up at Roger and he and Rob were playing jump rope with Roger's elephant nose. "What?? Oh yes yes, of course," he added hastily.
"And then," Roger sniffled through his tears. "I shall choose a new spot, upon the window sill, to sit and continue crying about my Marky."
Frodo and Rob looked at him sadly, and then looked at each other sadly. Then Rob suddenly said, "Hey, guess what?? Glinda and Anthony Rapp called us this morning and asked us if we'd like to have dinner with them this evening!! And I said yes! How about it, Roger? I'm sure a nice evening out would make you feel better."
Roger looked at Rob, and then looked down at his nose. "Oh, I'm sure they won't mind," said Rob reassuringly. "Glinda might even have some magical sock puppet powder to help take away that elongated nose."
The depressed, ansgty rock star sighed. "Okay fine. We'll go," he relented. He then got up, went into his room, and slammed the door behind him, probably to go mourn some more. Frodo, Rob and Jeff (who had magically dropped from the ceiling after fixing the lightbulb) all looked at his door, then looked at each other and started giggling.
"I wonder if the enormous length of his nose was taken from his johnson," said Jeff evilly.
Love it? Hate it? Please use le button on the bottom of le screen and let me know……Hippy, that means you!!
Oh hey, I bought the OBC recording of Rent and wow, it sounds really amazing!!! I love hearing all the stuff that wasn't in the movie and I loved hearing Anthony Rapp's voice sounding so young and pretty. He's still young and pretty though. -winks-