Unreal
By Steph first time posting Homicide fic here. If the first chapter looks familiar to anyone, it's because I posted a rough draft of it several years ago on 11 cents. I reread it recently, and decided to rewrite it and add another part.
Rating: I don't think it's at the NC-17 level. Probably R. Language and smut.
Timeline: During and post the Homicide Movie.
Summary: After learning of Gee's death, two detectives (current and former) turn to each other in an unexpected way.
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters. I also do not ship the two characters, but believe there is enough feeling between them where it could happen.
There was some part of him that couldn't believe that he was back in the squadroom again. After all, the last time Mike was here, for the dead baby case, it was not the most pleasant experience. He could have lived without seeing the forced friendliness of Lewis, the disgust of many of the other detectives, the expression of both anger and fear in Stivers' eyes. But he didn't need any of them. He was actually doing fine by himself. He enjoyed his PI work, calling all the shots. He had family, he had friends. He didn't need
to be back.
He was there because Gee was shot. His former lieutenant who had been nice to him in spite of everything. Without thinking, he knew he had to help. The first thing that he noticed was that he wasn't the only one who had that bright idea. It was like some twisted family reunion. There was Howard and Pembleton...weird. No one even gave him any dirty looks or anything. He even got a quick, fleeting smile from Lewis, which he considered a small victory. After all, there was nothing like a tragedy to bring people together. He gave Lewis a quick smile back.
And like a shot the detectives were off doing what they do best-investigating, working the shooting. Even the ones who were no longer detectives officially were investigating, but he felt out of it. He had no desire to work the streets. He was dying to look at the video of the shooting though. As a PI, he looked at videos and pictures a lot. It is how he found out things like cheating spouses. Videos were now his forte.
He went down to check out the video and much to his dismay Stivers was down there scrutinizing the video. She didn't hear him come in so he had the advantage. Unlike Lewis, he was still angry at her. He understood why Lewis did the things that he did. He used violence. Violence he understood, tattling he didn't. Covering for your partner he understood, telling on a friend is something completely different.
He and Stivers were friends before. Well maybe not friends, but at least acquaintances. They worked a case together when he was in arson and she was in narcotics. They got along so well that they went out to dinner one night. It was him and Annie and Terri and her boyfriend at the time. He remembered that her boyfriend was a major ass-he kept checking out every woman who passed by, all in front of his girlfriend. Mike knew he was never in the running for the Best Husband or Boyfriend award, but even he was appalled by this guy's blatant leering.
The next day he actually said to her, "You know that you could do so much better then that guy. He doesn't deserve you."
She smiled at him then, one of the saddest smiles that he had ever seen in his life and said "That's nice to hear, Sir Michael."
They didn't really talk after that. He wondered if the dinner and his statement had embarrassed her. He didn't even see her again until the Mahoney fiasco began. Lewis tried to introduce them and Mike (still reeling from the arson allegations and happy to see a friendly face he could tell his story to) was about to ask her if she wanted to go out to dinner sometime. He and Annie had divorced and he didn't think that the ass was still in the picture so who knew.
But he got his answer before he had even asked his question. He got the answer when he saw the way she was looking at his partner and the way his partner was looking back. His very newly married partner! Jealous? He was a little, but it wasn't that big of deal.
Between the bribery investigation and his new up-and-down relationship with Cox, he didn't focus too much on it. When Mahoney was just beginning, he was amused by Lewis and Stivers and their interactions. With the aftermath of Mahoney's shooting, he just wanted Stivers as far away from him as possible. Hard to do when she was transferred to homicide.
She still hadn't noticed him so he said in his jolliest tone. "Like the hair, Stivers. Looks good long."
When she saw him, she sort of backed away like he was going to attack her or something. It was kind of funny so he laughed. "Don't you know you're supposed to say thank you when you're complimented?"
She took a deep breath and finally found her voice. "Thank you."
She kept backing away and he laughed again. "Christ, Stivers, I'm not going to hurt you."
His words seemed to have flicked a switch and she said angrily, "Well, how am I supposed to know? You tried to hurt me last time."
He didn't think that that that was true. He had grabbed her to make a point, to
get her to listen to him, not to hurt her. Some of his anger faded as he realized that she thought he was really going to hurt her. That was too much for him to think about so he wanted to break the ice to cool things down a little. His nervousness and what was left
of the anger made what he wanted to be funny, extremely insulting. "Why'd you change your hair? Think Meldrick might start paying attention to you again?"
It was mean and he knew it. Despite his anger toward her, he got absolutely no satisfaction at the look of incredible pain on her face. It only made him wish that he hadn't said anything.
"What do you want me to say, Mike?" she asked, her voice steely cool. "That I am sorry? Will you stop doing this to me, Mike if I do? Well then, I am sorry. I am sorry that I ever got involved in the whole damned thing and I'm sorry that I worried enough about the three of us enough to say something. I didn't do it to get you or Lewis in trouble...I did it to help us. I went and told Gee the shootup was all my fault. I didn't mention either of you to him."
She couldn't be that stupid, could she? "You didn't have to. You think Gee would believe that you were the one to pull the trigger? Just opening your mouth was enough to implicate all of us."
"Shouldn't it mean something to you that I wanted to take all the blame for myself? No, forget it, Mike. I don't want to argue about it anymore. Just..."she stopped and said softly, practically whispering. "leave me alone. Please."
The pitiful tone in her voice and the plaintive request was what may have shocked the meanness out of him. He began to feel a little guilty so he decided, for the time being, to switch subjects. "Whatever happened to that jerk you were seeing? That one who went out to dinner with us that one time."
She said in a flat tone. "Oh, him. He left me for some woman he worked with."
"He didn't deserve you." It was a last-ditch attempt to make up for him bullying her (which is what he had been doing), clumsy, but good-intentioned. His words only seemed to hurt her more though.
"It doesn't matter. I just keep going after the same kind of guy." Her voice isn't flat anymore. Now it is just sad, painful.
As soon as she said that and he fully understood the implication (that she was talking just as much about Meldrick as she was about her ex), something weird happened. His anger melted into something else and it shocked him.
Just watching her there looking so sad for a second, he almost wanted to hold her.
It was the same feeling he had when he saw her again with Lewis. This feeling was odd and inappropriate but it was also extremely strong and he knew that he should probably leave before he made a total fool of himself.
"I'll leave you alone, Terri," he said. "Let you get back to work."
"Mike," she said lightly touching his arm. "I know you hate me. Meldrick does too to some extent. But I am sorry."
Touching his arm was not a good idea. He swallowed and backed toward the door. "I know you are, Terri. I'll see you around."
The next time that he saw her was when they were all at the bar celebrating Gee. She was behind the bar, standing near Lewis, but she might as well have been alone. Lewis barely acknowledged her. He wondered if she still had feelings for Lewis.
He wondered if she would like to go out to dinner sometime.
They were all feeling happy and then along came Death...well actually Brodie. And everything changed. Gee was dead. He couldn't believe it and yet there was no reason to doubt it. He felt so sad but he also felt out of place, like he shouldn't be there. He watched people's reactions because he didn't really have one of his own yet. Everyone was sad and crying and he just knew he needed to get out of there as soon as possible. Apparently he was not the only one who felt this way because he saw Terri slip out the back way and like an idiot he followed her.
She was walking fast and some stupid part of him wondered briefly if he could catch up with her. He did after a few seconds and grabbed her arm. Not like before, gently this time.
"What?" she asked him. Her eyes were still dry and she looked annoyed. "What do you want, Mike?"
"I want to make sure you get home okay," he said. It was the first thing that popped out of his mouth and he wondered what her reaction was going to be.
She shrugged. She didn't want to argue. He understood it. So he followed her home and walked her to her apartment.
"I'll be okay," she said to him. She still hadn't cried yet. It hadn't hit her yet the way it hadn't hit him. "You can go home now."
But he didn't. He kissed her instead. He couldn't explain it. There were so many things wrong with this situation. He knew this, but as soon as she kissed him back he forgot every reason.
The whole thing was very unreal. They stumbled into her apartment, kissing until she broke away and led him into her bedroom.
He knew it was unreal, knew it while he was kissing a trail down her neck, as he was trying unsuccessfully to unbutton her blouse. She had more success in unzipping his pants and pulling them down, and in celebration, she pulled his head down and kissed him again, before pulling away and taking his shirt off. He closed his eyes at the sensations of her lips and hands on his chest.
The second time he tried, he was successful in getting her shirt off and he let his hand skim her stomach, her back, her hips, listening to the change in her breathing. He stepped out of his pants, his boxers, and gentleman that he was, helped her out of her remaining clothes as well.
Even though he had been able to silence the word "unreal" (for it had become a refrain in his head) for the last few frenzied minutes, it hit him again, as he positioned himself above her on the bed, and she looked up at him with huge, anxious eyes.
He was about to have sex with Terri Fucking Stivers. It didn't get any more unreal than that.
He kissed her again, licking at her neck, kissing and nibbling his way down to her bellybutton and making his way back up to her lips.
"Mike," she moaned. "Please."
That was all he needed to hear. Again, the word "unreal" hovered in and out of his consciousness, but what they were doing right now, which ended with them calling each other's name, was enough to silence it completely.
They were silent afterward. He wondered if she was in shock. He wondered if he was in shock. He should say something though.
"I meant what I said before," he said. "I do like your hair."
She laughed, her laugh abruptly ending in a sob. "I can't believe it. About Gee."
It was hitting them both now. He held her as she cried, feeling so incredibly sad. For Gee, for her, for himself, even for all his ex-coworkers.
It wasn't unreal now. Quite the opposite.
He turned off her small bedside lamp. Her crying had slowed to an occasional sniffle. He pulled her closer to him.
"I'm glad you're here," she said hoarsely.
"Me too," he said, meaning it. He closed his eyes and soon they were both asleep.