Disclaimer: I. Do. Not. Own. Naruto.
A/N: Wheee!! Birthday fic for Itachi, aka Best Character Ever!!!
…Sorry; a little spazzy right now. Anyway, I dedicate this to all of the Itachi fans-and I certainly hope there's a lot of you! ;)
The title is an informal way of saying 'Happy Birthday' in Japanese, btw.
Tanjoubi Omedetou!
-x-
When Uchiha Itachi's eyes opened on the morning of June 9th, his first thought was, Today's that big mission that Father keeps talking about.
His second was, Wait, wasn't there something else going on today..?
And his third: Oh, yeah, it's my birthday.
He sat up and stared at a spot on his bedroom wall. I'm ten years old... Emotionless-seeming as he usually was, he couldn't help but grin just a little.
-x-
He eventually left his room and proceeded to the kitchen. Mikoto was making breakfast. Fugaku was gone, probably already at work. Sasuke was also absent, most likely practicing with kunai knives yet again, despite his mother's concerns. Business as usual.
"Good morning, Mother."
Mikoto turned, smiling. "Good morning, Itachi," she greeted him cheerfully.
Itachi smiled back. He waited.
"Breakfast is almost ready," Mikoto informed him, turning back to her work. "Just a few more minutes."
"All right," Itachi replied, a hint of confusion tugging at the back of his mind. Why isn't Mother saying anything about..today? Has she forgotten?
Impossible! Mikoto was usually so good at remembering things like birthdays, so Itachi couldn't believe she had forgotten her own sons'-after all, she had been there at his birth. Obviously.
But a sliver of doubt wormed its way in. Maybe she did forget, Itachi thought. After all, he himself had forgotten, until that morning, that today was his birthday, so was it so inconceivable that his mother had done the same?
Deciding that this was most likely the case and trying valiantly not to let it upset him, Itachi turned and left the kitchen.
"Oh, and Sasuke's in the yard. He wanted to speak with you," Mikoto called after her elder son.
Sasuke? Itachi sped up a little and headed for the backyard. A small, childish-sounding voice piped up with excitement in his mind: Maybe Sasuke remembered..
-x-
The younger Uchiha brother was, as expected, tossing kunai at an already-shredded tree trunk. A black circle, drawn with a wobbly hand, marked the target, and Itachi winced at the observation that that circle was the sole part of the tree his brother had not managed to hit. Well, he is only five..
"Good morning, Sasuke."
Sasuke turned, his face noticeably lighting up. "'Morning, aniki!" he said happily. "Um.."His tone took a sudden slide towards awkwardness. "I was wondering..if you have some time before your mission..could you help me out with my aim?" he blurted, sounding desperate. "Father's going to ask me about it later, I know it, and.."
He gestured hopelessly at the battered tree trunk.
"Please help," he pleaded in a very small voice. "Or Father might decide to make you an only child.."
"I'm sure things wouldn't go that far," Itachi replied dryly. He sighed. "Go on, let me see what needs to be fixed."
He watched his little brother throw several knives abysmally far away from the target, but his eyes didn't seem to be getting through to his brain very well. He was distracted. A voice of confusion and slight indignation was complaining inside his mind again.
Has nobody looked at a calendar today…?
Stop it, he told himself sternly. It's not like your birthday is anything special. It's just another day of the year. Another day to train, and go on missions, and..other normal, typically violent things. Yes. Nothing unusual.
Besides, what were you expecting? A party? You hate people. Presents? Like what-more weapons, as if you don't already have enough to fill the collective ego of the entire Uchiha clan? Which is saying something..moving on. Cake?
…Well, he admitted to himself grumpily, cake would have been nice. But that wouldn't work at all. I am an Uchiha. Uchihas do not eat cake. I'm pretty sure there's a rule against it, actually. Right between the rules covering sequins and the color pink.
He shook his head, as if to clear it of all the conflicting thoughts, and stood to explain the art of kunai-throwing to his perseverant but obviously direction-challenged otouto.
-x-
"Ah, summer." Shisui breathed the words with a dreamy expression on his face. "I remember a time long ago when summer meant free time, lemonade, and a gloriously large amount of doing absolutely nothing." He turned to his best friend and cousin with a wistful look. "Those were the days.."
"Here's an idea," Itachi suggested tonelessly. "Quit looking at calendars. Wear pants and pretend it's already autumn."
"Can't," was the glum reply. "Too many little kids running around outside the compound, squirting each other with water guns.."
Itachi watched his cousin with bemusement. "So. I assume you're also being deployed on the 'vitally important mission' later on?" he inquired, hoping to distract Shisui before he went off on a half-joking tangent about how overworked they were.
"Actually, no," Shisui replied with a shrug. "Something else came up."
Itachi raised his eyebrows. "I'm sure that if there was something more important going on, I would have heard about it from Father ten times over by now. What is it?"
"Sorry, Itachi," the older boy responded with a grin. "Top secret."
They walked in silence for a few minutes. Itachi silently battled with himself over whether he should tell his cousin outright about today. But that would sound needy and pleading and disgustingly desperate-no, he couldn't do that. Maybe if he just hinted..? Yes, that might work. Shisui was smart, he could pick up a hint. He knew he was still being childish and ridiculous, but he found he couldn't help it. It was his birthday, curse it; was a little recognition of that fact too much to ask?
"Shisui..do you know the date, by any chance?"
"The date? Uh..I think it's the ninth. No-wait, yeah, it is. June ninth," Shisui decided. "Why? Something insanely important happening that I've forgotten about?" A sheepish look came over his face, and Itachi knew why; his friend had unfortunately done just that more than once. The elders had been furious..
He focused intently on the ground while shaking his head, and the pair lapsed back into silence.
The fact was now confirmed: it was Itachi's tenth birthday, and all of the people closest to him had utterly and totally forgotten. Unbelievable.
Even more unbelievable, he told himself in that firm, chiding voice, is that you are allowing this to upset you. Get over it. Everyone forgot your birthday. So what.
He nodded to himself. Begin Operation: I Don't Care That You Don't Remember The Day I Was Born.
..I need to work on that title..
-x-
The mission lasted the rest of the day, and cut deeply into the night as well. Itachi returned home unscathed, but exhausted and hoping to escape to bed before Fugaku could catch up and go over the finer points of the mission with him. Again.
The lights inside his house were off, leaving it dark, which wasn't that unusual; it was late enough that Mikoto might already be in bed. Itachi, doing some quick calculations, realized with a somewhat sinking feeling that it was about eleven thirty at night. In another half an hour, his birthday would be over. He would have been ten years old for an entire 24 hours, without anyone saying a word about it to him.
Sighing, reminding himself that he didn't care, Itachi crossed the threshold and made a beeline for the kitchen. He needed water, and then he could retreat to sleep so his father couldn't lecture him on what could have been done better.
"Surprise!"
Itachi jumped about three feet in the air. The cheer, being chorused by two different people, had come out of the darkness. What the..?
"..Um..Mikoto-san, where's the light switch? I can't find the light switch!"
"It should be about a foot to your right.."
"But-"
"..Your other right, Shisui-kun.."
"Oh..Sorry, sorry, you know I get confused easily when I'm tired..Ah, I think I found it!"
The lights came on, and an extremely confused Itachi found himself looking at his cousin and his mother, sleepy-looking but smiling, and wearing ridiculously colorful party hats. The kitchen table had sitting in its center a small purple cake in a shape that was questionably a circle.
Itachi blinked. Was this what he thought it was..?
"Happy birthday, Itachi," Mikoto said with a fond smile.
Shisui grinned. "Yeah, happy birthday. It's about time you got home; we've been stationed here since you left, which was about..thirteen hours ago. I almost convinced your mom to let me eat the cake without you.." He faked a sigh. "But no such luck."
Itachi was speechless.
"Sasuke tried to stay awake for you," Shisui continued apologetically, "but he conked out awhile ago." The prodigy's gaze was drawn to his little brother, who was wearing his own party hat and sleeping against the refrigerator. "See? Out like a rock.."
"..No m'not.." A sleepy grumble came from the small boy, who moved slightly. "M'awake." He yawned. "Happy birthday, aniki.."
"…Thank you, Sasuke.." was the still-dazed reply.
"What, did you think we forgot?" Shisui asked incredulously, connecting the dots. "Well, I mean, that was sort of what we were going for, but…it should have been harder to convince you!"
"..What?" Itachi said in disbelief.
"Mikoto-san is your mother, Itachi." Shisui stated the obvious. "Sasuke's your little brother and he idolizes you. And I'm your best friend! Give us some credit next time, huh?"
"Well, when you put it that way..I suppose you're right," Itachi admitted. "Thank you."
"Don't mention it," Shisui replied, waving his hand. "And I mean don't mention it. Ever. Fugaku-san would probably have a fit if he knew we'd baked a cake in his house. Isn't there a rule against cake in the Uchiha compound..? Anyway, that reminds me.." He shot the table a leer. "That cake has been sitting there, tormenting me, for hours..can we eat it now?"
"Certainly," Mikoto said, producing a knife from nowhere.
Itachi gave the little cake a better look. It was wobbly, the frosting had been applied unevenly, somebody had misspelled 'birthday' on top, and it was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.
"Shisui-kun and Sasuke decided to relieve me of cake-baking duty," Mikoto explained, sounding amused.
"Ah. Point taken, Mother."
She cut the cake into four big pieces, passing one to Sasuke (who had effectively been awoken at the word 'cake'), one to Shisui (who veritably drooled at the sight), and one to Itachi, keeping a slice for herself.
"We'll have to be thorough," Shisui decided firmly, "so that your dad doesn't find out." His grin broadened. "Dig in!"
They all bit into the cake. A short pause ensued, during which all four Uchihas mulled over the taste of the cake in their mouths.
And then, as if on cue, all four of them started choking at the same time.
Shisui and Itachi battled for the sink in which to spit out the vile substance; Itachi won, leaving Shisui to run for the garbage can. Sasuke dug a bowl out of a cabinet and used it. Mikoto, being the adult, suffered in silence, her face grim.
Once the greenness had faded from their faces, Itachi was the first to ask the million-dollar question: "What was that?!"
"I didn't touch the batter," pointed out a confused Mikoto.
"I only did the decorating," Sasuke defended himself.
Which inevitably leaves…
Three heads swiveled towards Shisui.
"Hey!" he yelped. "Why're you looking at me?!"
"You're the one who made the batter," Sasuke said, ratting out his cousin shamelessly.
"But..but I grabbed the brown bag of sugar, just like you said, Mikoto-san!" Shisui protested.
"…Shisui-kun," Mikoto said slowly, a look of dawning comprehension on her face. "I said the white bag. Not the brown one."
"No way-you..you did..?" There was an audible gulp, followed by a sheepish laugh. "Uh…oops?"
There was silence for a few more moments, eventually punctured by a giggle from Sasuke. As the ridiculousness of the situation hit home, the entire kitchen joined in the laughter.
"What's going on?" a tired and slightly gruff-sounding voice demanded. Shisui and Itachi shot each other nervous looks. Fugaku was home.
"Oh..nothing, dear," Mikoto stammered as her husband came into view. Fugaku caught sight of the bitten cake slices and frowned.
"Mikoto, what-?"
"It's Itachi's birthday, Fugaku-san," Shisui said stoutly. "This is our little celebration."
The frown deepened. Fugaku opened his mouth to protest again, but was cut off by Sasuke. The youngest Uchiha had a suddenly sly look in his eyes. "Try some cake, Father," he suggested, all innocence.
Shisui choked and passed it off as a cough. Itachi's eyes widened.
"It's really good," Sasuke pressed. "I don't-" Fugaku began, but he was silenced by the look on his younger son's face.
(Let it be known for the record that not even Uchiha Fugaku can resist puppy-dog eyes.)
"…Oh, all right," he muttered, reaching for a plate.
Itachi glanced at Shisui, who shot him a grin that was probably only seconds away from morphing into a full-blown howl of laughter. Mikoto was pretending to wash her hands so the running water would cover her quiet laughter. And Sasuke was smiling up at his father in a way that seemed to look, Itachi realized, quite evil.
Shisui edged closer to his cousin and muttered in his ear, "Your gift's in your bedroom. Just wanted to let you know before your dad tries to kill me."
The younger boy couldn't help but smile. "Thank you, Shisui. For all of it."
"Hey, no problem." He smiled back. "And these may very well be my last words, but..Happy birthday, Itachi."
And with high spirits they backed against the door, for easier escape once they inevitably had to start running from Fugaku.
-Fin-
A/N: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, ITACHI-SAN!!!!!