I wasn't one of those lovingly wrapped up in blanket babies that were placed in baskets and placed gently on the orphanage doorstep while some loving mother rang the door bell. Then again, I wasn't one of those all knowing orphans that were left to watch their parents be killed by a drug dealer from their crib. I was just a six year old girl who's mom was sent to jail. She didn't kill anybody or anything, but she might as well have. It didn't really matter to me what she did, she still left me. She still willingly handed her daughter over to the state eleven years ago. She didn't fight with the police as they carted her off to jail, she just went willingly. Probably because she knew she was guilty. That's what hurt the most.
It's been eleven years, and I still remember the look on her face when the police kicked down the apartment door and told her she was under arrest. She just starred at me. Her eyes were wide and she looked like she was going to tell me something. She never did.
That was the last time I saw her. Not that I really minded. I mean, I loved her, I missed her, I needed her, yet I could never have her.
I visit her sometimes. I bring her pictures I sketched and other things she might need. She would always smile and tell me how big I've gotten. She would tell me I was the only good thing that came from the swine that was my father. She didn't like my father. Then again, neither did I.
Apparently he was some low life who didn't really have a home. Thank god too, because I don't think I could have stood living with him. I mean, not that I enjoy where I'm living now. Which is basically a new place every week.
You see, I'm what you call a ghost child. The kid that refuses to talk to anyone. I mean, I don't do it to spite people, its just that I have nothing to say. I do talk to someone though. Matter of fact, that person is my best friend. Yeah, I was seventeen, and yeah, my best friend was the fourteen year old boy, Kyle, that I found crying in one of the rooms at an old foster home of mine. After that, we've been inseparable. I have him tell people we're brother and sister so we have to be brought to the same foster homes together. It worked, even though they knew we were lying.
See, they took these fancy pictures of us and sent them out to a bunch of foster families. Then those families would pick which kid they wanted and we would be shipped out to them. When they realized they didn't want us, they would send us away again. I grew used to it though. I didn't talk to anyone but Kyle because I knew that sooner or later (Usually sooner) we would be sent to live with some other smuck who didn't want to deal with an overly hyper kid and a girl who refused to talk.
Kyle and me were very different. I was shy, and Kyle, well, he wasn't. He was outgoing, and brave, and smart, and just down right amazing. He was the only kid I've ever gotten along with. His hair was a light brown and shaggy, contrasting nicely with his green eyes. I wasn't like Kyle at all. My hair was long, curly, and red, falling over my left eye, and covering most of my freckles. My eyes were blue, but not the nice, dark blue that models have, but that nasty ice blue that made you want to shiver. I was disgusting. Not that I cared what people thought of me.
If I did care, I would at least talk to people. Not saying that people didn't talk to me. Because believe me, they tried. Social workers, foster parents, kids, and even babies. But I wouldn't budge. I didn't feel like taking my time to form words, or use my breath to have a conversation. It just wasn't worth the effort. Everyone always left you in the end anyway.
"Kira, when do you plan on finishing packing your clothes?" Kyle asked as he walked into my room where I lay on my bed reading a book about ant hills.
"You mean, when do I plan on putting the whole three outfits that I actually own in a plastic bag?…Soon." I said shrugging at him sarcastically. He just rolled his eyes.
"I do believe it's four outfits oh precious sister of mine." Kyle smirked as he opened my closet and took out the seven shirts, and five pairs of jeans that hung there. After stuffing them into a bag, he pulled out the giant trunk that was under my bed that held all my books. Since I knew we never stayed in one place for long, I didn't bother to unpack my books. Instead, I kept them in their trunk. I had a lot of books. Not enough to fill a library, but enough to satisfy me.
Most of the books had to do with nature, or history, something that Kyle didn't find exciting at all. He stuffed the plastic bag in the trunk, above the books and closed it up again.
"We're leaving any minute. I have a good feeling about this place." Kyle said. I sighed drastically as I stood up and closed my book. He was three years younger then me, yet he still towered over my five foot frame. I scowled at this.
"You said that about the last place." I told him truthfully.
"But I really mean it this time! I mean, they seem pretty nice. Apparently they live on some Indian reservation. That should be fun." Kyle said, being his optimistic self. Kyle was so much more mature then me, which is probably why he treats me like I'm two sometimes.
"They'll be just like the others. After a week they'll get rid of us because 'we're too much to handle.'" I told him, a hint of a grimace playing on my lips.
"Well I heard this woman can't have babies or something. Apparently she's always wanted kids and her and her fiance wanted to foster. Maybe if you actually talk to them this time they'll keep us for more then a few days." I doubted it. I always felt bad for Kyle. I knew he didn't like to move around so much, but he would always insist that we were siblings so he would be moved to a different house when I was. God I loved this kid.
"Yeah, well I'm not going to make friends with these people when we'll just be leaving again in a week." I stated bitterly, causing Kyle to sigh at my negativity.
"I'm not asking you to be their friends babe, just for you to talk to them. Even if it's just a little." He said as if he were talking to a five year old. It was my turn to sigh.
"Yeah, yeah." I said dismissively as Kyle picked up my trunk and we started to go down the stairs and to the front lawn where we waited for the social worker to pick us up.
I could see Kyle struggling with the heavy trunk. Even with his newly grown muscles, I knew it must be heavy for him.
When the social worker came, she immediately started talking to me, in hopes of a conversation. No such luck.
"But I can't believe he did that. I mean, yeah he's a super star and all, but that's insane!" The young woman gossiped from the drivers seat, brushing her curly black hair out of her eyes.
I just nodded dully from the backseat before laying my head against Kyle's shoulder and closing my eyes.
I hadn't talked to anyone besides Kyle in about four years, what made her think I would start now? I didn't need anyone besides Kyle. He was the only person I really liked. The only one I really wanted to have with me for the rest of my life. The only person I needed. He knew this. And he needed me too.
We drove for hours. It was extremely frustrating, even if I was asleep for most of it. We usually didn't move this far away at one time. I mean, moving from one side of Washington to the other was kind of intimidating.
"We're getting close." Kyle whispered. I nodded, sitting up and leaning my head against the cool glass of the window.
We pulled into a small town called Forks a little bit later, apparently that meant we were really close. I no longer had butterflies in my stomach like I used to when moving to a new place. It was such a common occurrence now that I wasn't even nervous.
We would go meet these new people. They would be mad at me for not talking, along with other things like how I wake up extremely early, or how I drink all the coffee in the house, or even that I refuse to eat sometimes. They would also get mad at Kyle for doing things like eating all the cookies, or talking really loud, and even because he's too 'happy.' I don't know how you can be too happy, but believe me, it's possible.
"This is it kids!" The social worker, I never really bothered to ask her name, told us as she pulled up to a small red brick house with flowers all over the place. Flowers. That meant I could come out here late at night and garden when no ones around. I took it all in approvingly.
"I like it." Kyle said as he scooted out of the car, grabbing my hand and pulling me out behind him. He kept my hand in his as he smoothed out my twisted blue sundress that I wore to every new house on Kyle's orders.
"I'm glad you approve." I whispered to him smugly as we approached the front door with the social worker.
"Ready?" The woman asked as she knocked on the door. I didn't answer, not that she expected me to.
A tall guy opened the door, a shorter woman beside him. They were both really tan and excited looking, though I didn't see anything exciting about the situation.
The woman had long scars running down the side of her face, but I didn't pay much attention to them because everywhere else she was beautiful. The tall guy wasn't wearing a shirt and I thought instantly about one of the foster kids at an old home who told us about how his step father sexually abused him. I instantly shrank away from the big man and into Kyle's side. He didn't seem to mind, but the couple in front of us did.
"You must be Kyle and Kira! It's so nice to finally meet you guys! We've heard so much about you! I can't believe you're finally here." The woman, who Kyle said was Emily, exclaimed.
"It's good to be here!" Kyle said throwing himself at the woman and hugging her wildly before turning to the man and shaking his hand. The woman looked like she was on cloud nine as she turned to me, probably expecting me to hug her too. Not a chance.
"Well why don't you two go get settle while I talk to Emily and Sam about Kira's, uh, condition." The social worker said kindly. We were ushered into the house and into the kitchen where we sat quietly in the chairs while Sam and Emily talked to the social worker in the living room. No doubt she was telling her about how I didn't talk to anyone but Kyle.
"You really should talk this time Kira. Maybe make them like you?" Kyle asked hopefully. I just nodded my head before responding quietly.
"I'm not setting myself up to get hurt Kyle. If I talk to them, I'll start to like them. I'll become attached, and it will be ten times harder when they kick us out."
He looked disappointed but nodded his head in understanding. We waited a few more minutes and eventually Emily and Sam came into the kitchen.
Emily looked at me sympathetically. Geez lady, it's not that I can't talk, its just that I don't want too.
"Well, are you guys hungry? I could make you something to eat?" Emily asked, looking at me the whole time. I didn't even bother to shake my head no, I knew Kyle would answer for me.
"Well, Kira won't eat. But I'm pretty hungry." He replied cheekily. I looked at him and rolled my eyes, a smile playing at my lips.
"Oh…" Emily asked, looking at me with a confused expression. "well, what would you like to eat?"
"Eh, anything. But if you don't mind, Kira could probably go for some coffee." I nodded my head vigorously along with his words, smiling my thanks when Emily handed me a cup.
"You know Kira…"Sam started as he sat down next to me. I visibly shrunk away, but he didn't seem to notice. "If you need anything, you could just ask."
I looked at him for a moment. Was he seriously trying to get me to talk? I mean, shouldn't you just let it be? I haven't talked to anyone but my 'brother' in four years, and this creepy, half naked, foster parent guy was not going to change that.
Sensing my unease, Kyle quickly came to my rescue, putting a protective arm around my shoulders and taking time out of eating his food to reply to Sam for me.
"She knows." Kyle reassured him before he finished eating.
After Kyle ate dinner, Emily showed us to our rooms. I got the small one with a single window over looking the woods that was right next to the bathroom. The walls were white, and only a bed and a dresser stood in the room. I didn't bother unpacking, because I knew Kyle would do it for me later. He was better at that stuff. Kyle's room was right next to mine, and looked almost exactly the same, except his didn't have a window.
"It's really nice here." Kyle said, plopping down beside me on my bed. I nodded agreement.
Emily and Sam retreated into the kitchen after showing us where our rooms were. They claimed they wanted to give us time to unpack, though I secretly knew they were going to talk about the whole situation.
"What are you reading?" Kyle said, flicking the cover of the book in my hands.
"It's a book with a collection of Edgar Allen Poe's work." I told him seriously. He gave me a weird look before standing.
"Well as much fun as this is, I think I'll be going back to my room now." He said, kissing the top of my head and walking to the door.
"Good night." I said numbly, getting to engulfed in a story about a crazy man killing an old guy and hiding his heart under the floor boards. Oh the wonderful work of Edgar Allen Poe.
"Night." He said with a salute before walking out.
I snuggled down into my covers, pulling them up to my chin. This house was freezing. Not even cold, when I say freezing, I mean freezing.
I finished my book before it was even ten at night so I decided to go to sleep. I mean, I wasn't one to stay up late anyway.
I woke up at five thirty about to freeze to death. I usually wake up around that time, but the fact that I was so cold wasn't at all pleasant.
I got up, walking down stairs and into the kitchen. I sat in one of the chairs, not knowing where anything was to make coffee. I sighed. I would have to wait until Kyle woke up s he could ask for me.
"Kira? What are you doing up so early sweet heart?" Emily asked as she walked into the kitchen, a pink robe wrapped around her as she rubbed her eyes.
I simply shrugged. She nodded.
"Well…would you like some breakfast?" She said sweetly. A little too sweetly if you ask me. I shook my head no. I wasn't really hungry.
"Coffee?" She sighed, looking expectant. I gave her a small smile and a nod. I could tell she wasn't really a morning person. I was.
She handed me a cup and I drank….four cups.
"Do you always drink so much coffee?" She asked, laughing slightly at my guilty expression. I nodded. I did. I liked coffee. It wasn't my fault.
"Don't worry Emily, you'll get used to it." Kyle said smiling as he walked into the kitchen, yawning loudly, which made me yawn quietly. Emily laughed heartily at that. Well at least she thinks my drinking habits are amusing.
"What do you guys want to do today?" Emily asked as she handed Kyle a plate piled with way too many eggs.
"What's there to do? Kira loves the beach. Or rather, she likes to look at the beach." Kyle siad, adding in some of my favorite things in the world. I loved the beach. I loved the look of it, I loved the sand, but I hated the water. Mostly because I didn't know how to swim. No one ever taught me. And with the no talking to people thing, they wouldn't know if I were drowning, because I wouldn't call for help. So no one bother teaching me.
"Well we can go there if you want. It's not far from here." Emily said, a perfect house wife smile on her face. Gag me.
"Is that food I smell!" A booming voice called from outside, making me jump. Emily frowned before screaming for Sam who tumbled down the stairs seconds later.
"Sam! I thought you said you would keep the boys away until the kids got settled!" Emily exclaimed, pointing at Sam's chest accusingly.
"Sorry Em, I told them! They don't listen!" He whined before going outside to talk to some people.
"Who are they?" Kyle asked in his curious voice.
"Sam's friends. I told him not to bring them around here just yet." Emily said, looking out the window accusingly.
"Well it's alright with us. We don't mind people." Kyle said, hoping to ease the tension that was rising in Emily. I didn't say anything.
"Well…if you really don't mind…I'm sure they're hungry…" She said, looking outside with a caring expression before yelling, "Let them in Sam!"
After that, Sam and four other giant guys came stumbling into the kitchen. When I say they were giant, I mean it. They were four of the biggest guys I've ever seen. At first, I just thought Sam was abnormally large, but now I see its all the La Push guys.
"Guys, this is Kyle and Kira." Sam said, watching the boys intently. I looked at each of them impassively. I didn't really care to talk to them.
I looked at the one guy, the one who seemed to be starring at me for some reason. Okay, weirdo, no need to stare at me, I know I'm weird.
"So who are you guys?" Kyle asked, throwing an arm around my shoulder and leaning over me to look at the guys. I turned away and took another sip of my coffee. I saw the guy who was starring at me start shaking out of the corner of my eye. What was wrong with him? If I cared enough, I might have just asked.
"What's wrong with him?" I whispered in Kyle's ear.
"Um, she want's to know what's wrong?" Kyle said to the shaking boy. He quickly calmed down and looked at me. I blushed and turned away.
"Why doesn't she ask me herself?" The boy asked, a smirk wide on his face. Kyle just laughed at him like he was an idiot. I wondered if he really was.
"Because she hasn't talked to anyone but me in years." He said through breathes. The guy frowned at this and the guy beside him started laughing and patting the guy who was starring at me on the back like he felt bad for him. Apparently this only made the guy who was starring at me more angry and caused him to start shaking again.
"Who is he?" I whispered to Kyle again, making everyone frown at my secrecy.
"His name is Paul." Kyle answered back. I nodded. Okay, so the creeper was Paul. I had to remember that, if I wanted to avoid him at all costs.
Hey guys, what did you think? I'm honestly a little unsure about