Author's Note: I wrote this piece here after I once again lost a game of ping pong against my mother. And yeah, I admit it I can be a really sore loser
Disclaimer: I don't own Tony, Gibbs or anyone else of the NCIS fandom.
Summary: Tony will never be able to live up to Gibbs, but he is very well aware of that fact.
He couldn't be.
He couldn't be Gibbs. He knew that.
Tony was well aware of the whispers that were cursing around the office. People said he was trying to be Gibbs and that he could no way live up to his former boss. He saw the look in their eyes and realized what they really thought about him. He was considered a stupid boy that was chasing everything in a skirt and had only had the luck to be taken under Gibbs wing for no obvious reasons. They said he lacked the experience and the morale to lead his own team, he would make a mistake and someone would have to pay for it.
He knew he couldn't be Gibbs.
But it weren't the hidden remarks and looks of the other employees in the NCIS headquarters that really hurt. The most painful was the reaction of "his team". Once he had been made team leader he had realized that none of his co-workers was able to see through his mask. Neither McGee nor Ziva were willing to accept him as their new supervisor. Not even Abby believed that he was able to lead a team. Tony saw it in the look of her eyes. Her eyes were filled with pity. With pity for the little immature boy that wanted to play boss but would never succeed. The one who was trying to fill shoes that were way to big for him, that's what he would always be for her, for them.
He couldn't be Gibbs and he knew it. But he sure as hell wouldn't stop trying.
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