A/N: So I know I have other more important works to be updating, but this little -haha if nearly 6,000 words is considered little – one-shot just came to me and wouldn't leave me alone to work on other things until I wrote it. Not my best work, but I think it turned out decent especially being my only fic –well only fic that makes sense – that isn't rated M for very explicit reasons. Anyways enjoy and leave reviews purty please!
We Are Young
Dean exited the bathroom where his supposed "friends" were currently getting higher than the Empire State. He sat down at his table and looked over to the bar. He groaned and instantly hated the man in sunglasses whom was currently sitting in a chair that he used to be able to call his. It wasn't that dude had stolen his chair per say, it was more his motives for sitting in the chair. But that wasn't exactly it either.
Dean hated the man in sunglasses with a fiery passion because 1.) he was talking to Castiel, 2.)he was touching Castiel, with one hand on his leg and the other on his cheek, and 3.) Dean just knew that he was asking about his scar by the way he was gently caressing Castiel's cheek.
But Dean didn't just hate the Sunglasses across the bar. He also hated himself because he knew that he was the one who had given Castiel that scar – not to mention the one mostly hidden by his left eyebrow – months ago.
Dean's heart ached as he continued to watch Castiel and realized that it had been going on 4 months since that night and subsequently nearly four months since he had gotten to do more than just watch the beautiful man across the room.
Also Dean's own personal fault.
Just four months ago they'd been bestfriends going to college together and then Dean had gone and fallen for his completely-out-of-his-league bestfriend and then -being the emotional-retard that he was - hadn't just told the guy, got rejected, and gone on with his life. Nope. He had had to and get jealous over Castiel flirting with one of their mutual friends Balthazar while all three of them had been drinking and start a fistfight.
Well no. Not exactly how it had happened. Castiel had technically thrown the first punch, hitting Dean square in the face, hard enough to nearly dislocate his jaw. But that happened only after Dean practically kicked Castiel's childhood bestfriend out of their dorm and called Castiel himself a slut.
That being said Castiel's punch had been accompanied by the same insult to Dean. To which Dean responded with a punch of his own, blacking Castiel's eyes and splitting the skin below his eyebrow.
Castiel's response had been a swift kick to Dean's balls, but before Dean went down he managed to swing his arm again, not connecting with as much force this time, but his class ring still cutting a gash across Castiel's cheekbone.
To Dean's credit he had tried to apologize once he could breathe again, but Castiel had angrily dragged him out into the hall and locked the door for the first time since they'd lived in the dorm.
Due to Dean's emotionally-shut-in status and Castiel's predicament of rusty people skills that had not simply talked things out once they sobered up. Instead Dean moved to a new dorm across campus to room with the nerdiest student he could find – some Smarty McSmart-Smarts named Kevin something – so that he wouldn't be at risk of falling for his roommate and royally fucking everything up. Again.
"Dean? Are you listening?" CJ asked.
"Huh? Yeah, of course," Dean assured when in reality he hadn't even noticed that him –whatever CJ was to him – was back with fresh drinks.
CJ moved his crystal-blue gaze to where Dean had been looking and sighed, "Dean, I know you still care for him and all, but we need…I need to know what we are."
Dean's heart throbbed again as he looked into CJ's blue eyes because that's all they were: blue. Not even beginning to get close to the cerulean mixed with ocean and a summer sky of Castiel's eyes. Dean shook his head and repeated CJ's question on his head. What were they? Sure they'd gone out a few times and they'd slept together more times in the last two weeks than Dean could count on both hands, and yeah Dean liked the guy well enough, but at the same time - "I can't even remember your friggin name," Dean breathed aloud.
"What?" CJ asked with a head-tilt that reminded Dean more of Castiel than any of his other Casscentric traits.
"No I mean- " Dean shook his head. "I know that you're CJ, but I can't for the life of me remember what the C and J stand for."
"Well it sure as Hell isn't 'Castiel James' if that was what you were hoping," CJ hissed, sounding more hurt than actually pissed, because he wasn't stupid he knew that what had attracted Dean to him was the fact that he resembled Castiel.
Dean looked at his beer guiltily, "I'm sorry CJ. I am, and I don't mean to, but I just-"
"I understand, Dean, first loves are always the hardest to forget," CJ smiled sadly, "I get it Dean, I do. That being put into consideration…friends?"
"Friends," Dean agreed with a small smile.
"Alright, well seeing as we're friends now," CJ began, "I feel obligated to inform you of something."
"What?"
"You're not the only one who came here tonight to try and make it with your first love's doppelgänger."
Dean followed CJ's line of sight to the man in sunglasses, he was puzzled for a minute because sure the guy had a similar build and semi-spikey dirty-blonde hair, but besides that…And then he was pulling his sunglasses up to rest on his head and Dean seen the freckles and green-eyes.
"That being realized I would bet my two front teeth that Castiel is over there thinking that sure Mr. Sunglasses has green eyes, but they're nowhere close to being a pool of emerald forest mixed with flaming amber and I'd bet even more that his last thought was that although there are freckles present their count is off by approximately a quarter of a dozen."
Dean blushed, feeling like even worse crap for using CJ for his Castiel-like qualities. "I'm sorry," He mumbled.
"Don't worry about it, just…My advice? Man the fuck up and either move on or say fuck the past and go in for another shot." He stood and kissed Dean lightly on the cheek as the green-eyed man stared at him open-mouthed. "Good luck, Lover Boy."
After recovering Dean looked back over to Castiel to see him shaking his head and gently pushing Sunglasses' hand from his face, a clear sign that he was trying to forget how the scar had happened and quite possibly the person who had given it to him. And as much as he hated to admit it, that thought made Dean want to cry.
Dean scoffed at himself, grabbing his beer and turning away, because as much as he wanted to just man up and go over there the happy smile that Castiel was beaming at the man across from him was enough to keep Dean firmly in place and with that he decided on the second option of moving on and promised himself to not spare Castiel so much as a glace for the rest of the night.
And he didn't. At least not until he heard Castiel laughing, only it wasn't his Being-Around-You-Makes-Me-So-Happy-That-All-I-Can-Do-Is-Laugh laugh. No, it was his I'm-Buzzed-Off-My-Ass-And-The-Room-Is-Starting-To-Feel-Fuzzy-Which-I-Find-Incredibly-Funny laugh.
And so he looked up - simply telling his protesting brain that since it was past midnight he hadn't technically broken his promise – to see the man in sunglasses catching Castiel as he nearly fell off of his stool.
"I should be getting home," Castiel half-sighed, half-giggled.
"Oh come on, Casper," Sunglasses cooed.
"It's Castiel," Dean heard Castiel mumble half-heartedly as Sunglasses continued .
"Just another drink…or two."
"But I-"
"You don't have class tomorrow," Sunglasses purred, placing a hand on Castiel's inner thigh.
"I drove here though and…" Castiel began uncertainly, his eyes wide like a scared kitten's.
Sunglasses rolled his eyes and sighed in annoyance, "Oh come on Castor-"
"It's Castiel you douche-nozzle," Dean grit unable to stay in his seat as Sunglasses got more and more into Castiel's personal space. "And if he says no, then he means fucking no."
"Excuse me? Who the Hell do you think you are, guy?" Sunglasses spat.
It took all of Dean's will power and more not to fire back with "Who the Hell am I? Motherfucker please, who the Hell are you?" Instead he took a deep breath and spoke as calmly as he could, "An old friend of Castiel's."
"Dean, we haven't been friends for months," Castiel informed him, sounding annoyed.
Dean turned his eyes from Sunglasses to Castiel, "That doesn't mean that I don't still care about you."
Castiel's eyes softened for a split second before hardening full-scale, "Oh, so now you care about me?"
"I've always cared, Castiel. Even if I was too stupid to tell you, I have and even though I tried to for both our sakes, I never stopped," Dean took a deep breath and turned fully to Castiel, hoping to have the conversation he wished they'd had four months earlier. "Now look, I know that -"
"Do you fucking mind asshole?" Sunglasses interrupted. "I was having a conversation with Blue-Eyes here before you showed up like a dick."
Dean rounded on Sunglasses in agitation, "Listen you mouth breathing ass mon – "
"Dean, he's right," Castiel sighed, his voice holding no particular tone, just sounding slightly tired and somewhat slurred. "Just leave us…me…alone. You owe me that much at least."
And for what felt like the millionth fucking time that night; Dean almost cried, because he knew that Castiel's words were true. "As you wish," He breathed lightly and Castiel's eyes widened because that was the only reference people made that Castiel understood. And even then it had taken watching The Princess Bride nearly a dozen times to fully understand, but after he had him and Dean had used it as much as possible, shipping anyone in TV and movies who used the phrase and after a while it had become almost like their reference.
But then Sunglasses was placing a double-something in Castiel's hand and the brunette was slamming it down like he really was trying to forget all about Dean.
Dean turned away and left the bar with his shoulders slumped, believing that he would never see Castiel again and thinking, "Well at least I tried."
~o0o0o0o~
However as fate would have it Dean seen Castiel only two weeks later, in a whirlwind of Déjà vu at the same bar, complete with Castiel chatting , laughing, and drinking with another guy in sunglasses.
Dean quickly brushed off the Déjà vu, deciding to count his blessings while he still had some, and settled into another evening of watching Castiel with his sunglasses clad friend who seemed to be incapable of keeping his hands off of Castiel for more than five seconds despite Castiel pushing them off.
"I have work tomorrow, Tad; I have to go," Castiel slurred, trying to slide out of his seat.
"Aww, come on baby," Sunglasses 2.0 –Tad – purred, "Just a couple more and I'll take us back to my place."
"But –"
"Hush," Tad soothed, "Everything's okay, okay?"
"Okay," Castiel mumbled, taking the drink Tad handed him and sipping it, despite the fact that he still looked like deer caught in a drunk driver's headlights.
"I'mma go take a leak I'll be right back," Tad told him standing and heading for the bathroom.
Dean continued to watch Castiel and his heart did that aching thing again as he watched Castiel wobble on his stool with a pitiful look on his face. "What am I doing?" He heard Castiel mumble to himself.
And then with one last glace at the bathroom door to make sure Tad wasn't coming back, Dean was out of his chair and sitting in the stool opposite Castiel.
"Dean? What-"
But Dean cut him off knowing that this was his last last chance, "Give me a second I…I need to get my story straight." Castiel remained patiently silent as he watched Dean with wide eyes. "Look Castiel I know that you can't go anywhere now without someone asking about your scar. And I know I gave it to you months ago and that you're trying to forget. And I know that you probably hate my guts and never want to see my face again, but between the drinks and subtle things…the holes in my apologies…I'm trying hard to take it back."
Castiel gave him a blurry look as if he's only understood half of what Dean said. "I don' 'ate you…'least not all the way," He spoke slowly in a slurred voice. "But…I 'ready promised Tad that-"
"That you'd go home with him? Hanging out with douches who can't remember your name, sure, but going home with them? Cass that…that's not you, buddy."
"I know," Castiel sighed, "Not the old me 'least, but…times 'ave changed. I sometimes enjoy goin' home with people…living a little an' all."
Dean shook his head at Castiel slurred words and caught him as he nearly fell over again. "I'm going to respect what you want Cass, if you want to go to some dive motel and suck Tadley off, by all means go. But…if by the time the bar closes and you feel like falling down…I'll carry you home."
Before Castiel could even open his mouth Tad was back and speaking for him, "I don't know who think you are, but trust me guy; I got this."
"You'll carry me home?" Castiel asked sounding small and vulnerable.
"Of course! Yours or mine…Preferably mine." Tad winked and trailed his hand up Castiel's inner thigh.
Dean bit his lip hard enough to draw blood as he flung himself off his stool and hurried to the bathroom to cool off. Once in front of the mirror he grimaced at the blood running down his chin and began carefully cleaning it off, taking more time than was honestly necessary in hopes that by the time he got out Castiel and Sunglasses 2.0 would be gone.
Half way through his cleaning he heard a snorting noise from behind him and turned to see one of his classmates – Chuck Something - and another dude he didn't know leaned over a toilet snorting something off its seat.
He watched them for a moment longer soaking in the fact that all the people he hung out with did for fun was get high, before he quickly finished washing his face and exited the bathroom. He settled slowly back into his booth, and took a swing from his now room-temperature beer as he checked his watch. 1:30 A.M. He sighed as he stood, not really wanting to go home, but not having anywhere else to go. He had made it to the door when he was stopped in his tracks by a small pained noise – similar to that of a kitten that had just been dropped.
"But you said you would…"
"Yeah, but that's when I thought I would be getting laid tonight, Casper!"
"My. Name. Is. Cas-ti-el!" Castiel half-hissed, half-whimpered. "An' I'm not some cheap whore who fucks a guy on the furst date after a couple a drinks… 'least I'm gonna try an' not be that guy anymore." He made the dropped kitten noise again, "Please, I just want to go home and you said you'd take me."
Tad scoffed, "Like I said, that was when I thought I was gonna get laid, and seriously if that's not happening I'm not going to drive you home, let alone remember your stupid freak of a name!"
Castiel made another noise – this one more like a kicked puppy – and two seconds later Tad came storming past Dean and out of the bar.
Dean instantly became torn between chasing after Sunglasses 2.0 to punch his lights out and going to Castiel. In the end he headed over to Castiel who was laid half on top of the bar and shaking ever so slightly. Dean placed his hand on Castiel's shoulders and the smaller man flinched violently before looking up. The moment his eyes found Dean they lit up in a way that Dean hadn't even been aware of missing until that exact moment.
"Dean!" He practically sobbed, standing up on wobbly legs and collapsing into Dean's warm embrace.
"Shh, you're okay," Dean soothed, gently rubbing Castiel's back.
"I jus' 'ate people, 'ean," Castiel sighed, his words slurring together more and more. "I mean, I like ta thin' Imma decent person, ya know? But da they see that? No, all my life, all they sees a nice ass and purty eyes combined with a fr-freaks name an' all they wanna do is get laid. Tha's all I am ta them; a hole for their dicks." His words desolved into sobs and he clung to Dean's shirt as if his life depended on it. " 'cept you," He continued brokenly after nearly a minute of silence, "But then you called me a…you calt me a slut and I – I'm not! I mean jeezus I…I'm still a virgin for crissake!"
"I know sweetie and I'm so so sorry. I was drunk and jealous and hurt and I wasn't thinking at all and I'm just sorry." Dean pulled Castiel impossibly close and inhaled his sweet scent of vanilla and cinnamon the best he could from under all the alcohol.
"Sweetie?" Casiel sniffled. "Does…does that mean yu'll carry me home?"
"Always." Dean promised.
~o0o0o0o~
Dean gave Castiel a bottle of water to help sober him up a bit but nonetheless his next stage of drunkenness was kicking in by the time they got to the car.
Now most people only had one kind of "drunk" personality wise, but Castiel was what Dean liked to call "The ADHD Drunk" because of his tendency to move through several stages of drunkenness.
First Castiel was the giggly buzzed drunk. Then came emotions and hair-trigger crying. Next up: the arrival of the frisky drunk. From there it was the never-shut-the-fuck-up drunk. And lastly Castiel had one of two options: sleepy or pissed-the-fuck-off.
The flirting with Balthazar had happened towards the middle and end of the frisky stage and the falling out had happened at the peak of the angry drunk.
And that's where Castiel was after Dean's promise: horny as all Hell, pressing Dean to the side of the Impala and grinding their crotches together before Dean could even comprehend what was happening.
Dean allowed Castiel to rut against him and suck marks into his neck while Dean himself gripped Castiel's hips desperately as he peppered his hair and forehead with kisses, simply because he had missed the blue-eyed man so damn much.
But when Castiel's trembling hands began fumbling with his zipper, Dean gently pushed Castiel back, receiving a small pout from the brunette. "But, Deee-eeeannnn…"
"Cass, as much as I want you, you're drunk off your tits and I can't take advantage of you like that."
Castiel tilted his head adorably, his speech finally beginning to un-slur, "I can assure you that I possess no mammary organs, surly you are aware of this, Dean –
(And there was the Castiel Dean had fallen in love with)
And," Castiel's voice dropped to the level of pure sex as he spoke again, "As for the second part, it wouldn't be taking advantage of me, because drunk or not, I want you to do everything you want to me and more."
Dean groaned and forced himself to stand up straight, "Get in the car, I'll take you home and we can discuss this when you're sober."
Castiel sighed, but complied, climbing into the car from Dean's side, purposely displaying his toned ass to Dean.
Dean groaned again, but managed to control himself as he too climbed into the car.
They drove in silence for exactly .o5 miles before Chatty Cassie kicked in. "But why can't we discuss this now? If anything the copious amounts of alcohol we've consumed will make us more open and honest about our feelings. Taking into consideration of course that they are 'feelings' , which I assume they are if the 'as you wish' reference has any relevance at all. To my understanding it is used to proclaim love when one cannot physically state the love that is being felt, correct? Do you love me Dean? I mean I know that you used to as a friend, but do you love, love me? As in like, are you in love with me? And if so, why not tell me? I thought that we were so close…like family you said. Is that why you didn't openly proclaim your feeling? In fear that myself or others would consider them incestuous? And what is technically considered to be incest anyway? I mean cousins get married all the time, and it's no big deal, but yet if two siblings wish to wed, they cannot be. Step-siblings sure…although it is still frowned upon in many societies, considered just as high of a taboo as if they were blood related. And speaking of siblings, what about two siblings from one family marrying two siblings from another? I've always found the topic quite intriguing. In fact, back in high school I – "
"Cass!" Dean shouted, his head throbbing.
"Yes Dean?" Castiel asked softly, his eyes finally focusing on Dean instead of staring glassily out the front windshield.
"Could you maybe stop talking? Or at least not talk so goddamn fast, my head can't take much more of that shit."
"Of course, Dean," Castiel spoke softly, his voice sincere, much calmer and his words finally un-slurred completely. Castiel exhaled slowly, tapping his fingers against his lap, and giving Dean a happy smile as reassurance that he was doing as told. But only a millisecond later, his calm shattered and he was going again, "But you must also realize that we are young now – as young as we will ever be for that matter – therefore we must enjoy it before we are just dust in the wind. After all Kansas couldn't have been more wrong in saying that nothing lasts forever, but the earth and sky. The sky perhaps, but that would all depend on your personal perception of what exactly the sky is, but definitely not the earth. Each year – Hell each day – we kill it more and more. Even now, as we speak, we're killing it with every single gallon of gas your car is expelling into the atmosphere…That being said, we must truly embrace our youth…and what's youth without someone to love and share it with?"
Castiel fell silent and for some stupid reason Dean felt himself missing the beautiful – no matter how overly excited – gravelly lull of Castiel's voice. "And what – besides what we're not talking about until we're sober – do you propose we do to embrace our youth?"
"We'll set the world on fire," Castiel breathed quietly, finally starting to slow down. "We can burn brighter than the sun. I mean we were born in this world as it all falls apart so…why not? I mean sure, the angels never arrived like they were supposed to, but I can hear the choir. And I found someone to carry me home…" He trailed off and smiled sleepily at Dean before he began singing a vaguely familiar tune, "Tonight… we are young. So I'll set the world on fire! We can burn brighter, than the sun…"
Dean smiled and was preparing to join in when Castiel's eyes slipped closed and his head fell against the window with a painful sounding crack. Castiel jolted back up with a small mewl before shifting and settling more comfortably against the door panel.
Dean had to contain the 'aww' that was threatening to break out of his lips and instead thanked his lucky stars that Castiel had gone to "sleepy" instead of "pissed off."
~o0o0o0o~
By the time they reached Castiel's dorm, Castiel was out like a softly snoring light that didn't even come on when Dean opened his door. Dean chuckled lightly and gathered Castiel up in his arms to carry him inside.
He made it easily up the stairs and to Castiel's room, but couldn't quite figure out how to open the door with a sleeping Castiel in his arms. "Crap," He mumbled, realizing that he was going to have to wake Castiel up. He sighed and gently jostled Castiel in his arms, "Cass? Hey buddy, wake up."
"Mmph," Castiel mumbled bringing his arms up to wrap around Dean's neck. "What happened to 'sweetie'?"
"Not used to it," Dean answered honestly.
"Mm," Castiel hummed, nuzzling his face into Dean's neck.
"Cass, bu – um sweetie? Would you mind standing for a minute so I could open the door?"
Castiel grumbled, but obediently slid his legs down to the ground, his arms staying firmly wrapped around Dean's neck for support and general comfort.
Dean quickly reached out and turned the knob – knowing it would be unlocked – and shoved the door open. "Up?" He asked once the door was open.
Castiel nodded against Dean's shirt and slowly picked his legs up, wrapping them securely around Dean's waist.
Dean sighed and entered the dorm, kicking the door closed behind him and heading towards Castiel's room.
"Not my room anymore," Castiel sighed sleepily.
"What?"
"I…I moved into your room when you left…well when I made you leave."
"Why?" Dean asked puzzled as he entered what used to be his room and gently set Castiel down on what used to be his bed.
Castiel remained silent as he pulled his many layers of clothes off and Dean was preparing to repeat himself when Castiel replied. "It smelled like you," He sighed, rolling over and snuggling into a SpongeBob pillow that Dean quickly recognized as his own – a gift from Castiel's brother that Dean had forgotten in his impromptu move. "I've missed the smell of you."
Dean cleared his throat, the room suddenly feeling too warm. "Okay, well um, I should go so…uh y –"
"Dean?" Castiel interrupted. "Stay? I want to sleep with you tonight."
Dean actually blushed at that, "Dude I um…I uh, well not that –"
Castiel exhaled and Dean could practically hear him roll his closed eyes. "Not that wouldn't be nice, Dean, but it is completely not what I meant. I swear sometimes…please remove your head from the gutter, Dean! If I desire coitus; I would request coitus."
"So by sleeping you mean sleep? Like snoring, cuddling, drooling on each other's pillows, the whole nine yards?"
"Yes, Dean."
"Is that snuggling part optional?"
"No, Dean."
"Well alright then," Dean sighed in defeat. He stripped down to his boxers, crawled into bed and – under protest – wrapped his arms around Castiel and used his chest as a pillow.
~o0o0o0o~
When Dean woke up the first thing he did was panic because he didn't know where in the Hell he was. The second thing he did was become aware of the fact that his, mouth tasted like an armpit. And finally he realized that he was lying on top of a warm body and the entire night came back to him. He shifted and the body below him groaned. He looked up to see Castiel's eyes crack open. "Morning, sunshine," Dean croaked.
"Dean?" Castiel asked, sounding confused and panicky. He quickly shoved Dean off of him and sat up against the head board, pulling the blankets up to cover his exposed body. "Shit," He groaned, clutching his head as it tried to explode. "What are – how did you – did we – I don't –"
"Jesus, Cass, breathe," Dean insisted. "Take a deep breath and try to remember last night."
Castiel's brow furrowed as he forced his mind to function. "Oh," He breathed after a few moments of awkward silence. "Tyler simply wished to get me intoxicated so that I would engage in coitus with him, but I said no…to the coitus part at least." He paused for a second before tentatively meeting Dean's eyes, "We need to talk."
"Obviously," Dean nodded. "Are you sober enough?"
"Um, perhaps we should discuss it over coffee and breakfast?"
"Sounds good," Dean smiled hopefully.
~o0o0o0o~
Twenty minutes later they were fully dressed and sitting in a diner down the street.
"I'm sorry," Dean started to break the silence. "For…well everything, from the jealousy to the scars, the shitty half-baked apologies before now…all of it."
"As am I, Dean," Castiel spoke, surprising the other man. "As much as I'd like to deny it, the situation was as much my fault as it was yours."
"So…" Dean trailed of hopefully, "Friends?"
Castiel remained silent, scrutinizing the jelly on his toast before replying, "I had hoped that we could perhaps be…more."
"Roommates?" Dean offered, not wanting to get his hopes up too much, based on Castiel's drunken actions.
"And I thought that I was generally the one without a clue," Castiel chuckled dryly. "Alright Dean, you leave me no choice: we're going to have to discuss our feelings."
"Our?" Dean breathed. "As in you have feelings for me? Cass why…I know I probably don't have the right to ask this but, why didn't you tell me before?"
"Tell my straight best friend that I was – well am – in love with him?" Castiel shook his head. "I could've lost you Dean. I couldn't take that risk." He set his toast down and placed his hand over Dean's where it was resting on the table. "The real question is, why didn't you tell me? I mean I get why you didn't vocally tell me, but why not just show me how you felt, the way you do with everything else?"
"I…I couldn't stand to see you with anyone else, but then at the same time, I knew that you deserved so much more than me." Dean sighed flipping his hand over to hold Castiel's properly. "But now I don't think that I can push those feelings away anymore. Not now. Not after I got a taste of the world without you. Not now that I have you back…Now I know that I'm not all that you've got, but besides Sammy you are all I have. So please just…I want to make you happy. I want us to rebuild each other, even if it is just so that we can find new ways to fall apart. And I know that I don't have a lot to offer you, but I promise I'll do my best. And I know that there's so much more I could be giving and…and…"
"Dean," Castiel sighed, cutting off Dean's ramble. He smiled up at him, squeezing his hand tightly, "You…whether you realize it or not, besides Gabe, you are my everything. Or at least you were, but either way, I want you. And I cannot lose you. Not again."
Dean grinned like an idiot for all of two seconds before his face fell completely. "Oh, but Cass, you still deserve so much better than me just trying to –"
"Dean –"
"And looking and myself, I just know that I can't possibly be all that you want, but – "
¡Slap!
"OW! What the Hell are you slapping me for?" Dean asked, sounding hurt.
"For being stupid, even by your standards," Castiel stood and moved to sit on Dean's side of the booth. "You think that you're not what I want, but that's the thing, Dean! You're not just everything I have, you're everything that I want and so, so much more…even when you act like dumbass…which you're doing right now."
"A broke hick from Kansas who's barely passing college classes to become a mechanical engineer to support his baby brother and drunken father, is everything you want?" Dean scoffed in disbelief.
"If by all that you mean a hard working amazing person who puts everyone else's needs above his own, and is not only supporting himself, but his family, then yes."
"Cass –"
"This conversation is over, Dean." Castiel spoke calmly. "You either love me or you don't love me. If you don't: leave and we never have to see or think about each other again. But, if you do love me: stay and after breakfast we'll move your stuff back to our dorm and watch movies while eating popcorn and pizza. Then we can go to bed to snuggle and make out like a couple of horny teenagers. So, Dean…do you love me the way I love you?"
Dean stared unblinkingly into Castiel's beautiful eyes. He wanted to tell Castiel that yes, he loved him more than life itself, but his lips and throat refused to move.
"Either words or actions are acceptable, Dean," Castiel prompted, leaning into Dean's personal space.
Dean's breath caught in his throat as he took in the heavenly smell of Castiel so close up –and intoxicating mix of vanilla and cinnamon. "I…"
Castiel's face fell as he removed himself from himself from Dean's personal bubble, sliding out of the booth. He sighed and was turning to leave when Dean stood and his hand caught Castiel's arm.
Castiel turned back around and looked at Dean with pleading eyes, "Dean, I'm not a mind reader; you have to say something, anything…please."
"As you wish," Dean managed to choke out.
A grin split Castiel's face and he jumped into Dean's arms, knocking him onto the floor and landing on top of him. "God, I love you too," Castiel beamed, capturing Dean's lips in a passionate kiss.
Dean grinned against Castiel's lips, tangling one hand in his hair while the other found its way to the brunette's hip.
After what seemed like an eternity and yet still not nearly long enough, Castiel pulled away, blushing at all the eyes that were on them. "Home?"
Dean smiled at the fact that they shared a home again. "Yes, please," Dean grinned, sitting up. His expression softened slightly as he took in Castiel's face and gently stroked his fingertips over Castiel's scar. "I'm sorry."
And then they were kissing again, their lips working together in a sensual, passion filled lock.
And in that moment if the world had been set on fire, burning brighter than the sun around them, neither Dean nor Castiel would have cared less.
The End!
A/N#2: Not sure how I feel about that ending…maybe a nice steamy sequel, or multi chapter continuation in the future after I complete what I have going now? Let me know what you thought of this please, it fills me with happiness and the feely feels that feel
