"You know of me, yet I am nothing"
Growing up, I was told that I just have to give my best to be someone. Someone who mattered. Someone who was needed. It was a mistake to believe them.
I have dedicated all my life to the only craft I know...
...the craft of art.
I am Guertena.
You might have heard of me as a famous artist, a sculptor and a painter. Spare your words for I do not have the need for your praise, for deep inside, I am still nothing. I have no need for fame neither do I need anyone to tell me how great I am. All of those are lies; deceitful words meant to entice a person's desires. They know nothing about me, and they never will. Never shall I trust another soul with my thoughts.
All I wanted was for someone to recognize me for who I am, not the riches that I am capable of having. No man ever thought twice about what was truly inside my heart. I was beaten, bashed and humiliated for pouring my thoughts, my precious emotions, onto paper and wood. They never even realized how much sorrow and pain I have held against them.
They never realized how much anger fueled my madness.
I created the most beautiful and exquisite works that lines up the museum walls, but do they understand me? No! Every art I made was just another money-making piece for another person! They tell me how great I was but they never even tried to understand who I truly am! If they never knew how much value in money my artworks costs, they would surely be back to beating me, cursing me and calling me insane for trying to convey who I am. In the end, they just used my name to fill their pockets. I was just a name. I had no value. I am nothing.
I take another piece of paper and some select colors and I start painting again.
Trying to stir my broken heart, I find myself painting something different. Something that was not me. Something that has it's own identity. Something that was alive.
Before I knew it, I had a daughter painted in canvass. I shall name her Mary, my only daughter. The only girl I will ever love. The only one who will understand me. The smile in her fair maiden's face soothes my heart, her yellow wavy hair brightens my day and her deep green eyes pierces my soul.
She, my daughter, was my greatest masterpiece.
I put her in a special room, in a special wooden frame, that is my gift for her birth.
Alas, the days of happiness will never last. Soon enough, the sharks returned to force me into doing artwork that I never wanted to do. They need my hand and my name to get their riches. The poor souls who view my gallery will never understand. No one will ever come to help.
I stood fast and refused to do their bidding. With their fat hands and gnarly fists, they bashed my frail body and left me to "learn my lesson".
Broken, I gathered everything I have to do one last artwork. My biggest piece was about to unfold. I forcefully and painfully led my right hand, I damped my brush in both blood and paint and started bringing life to another place. Another world where Mary and I can live together in peace. A fake world. A Fabricated World.
I hanged myself immediately afterwards.
-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-
I woke up in an unfamiliar place. As I rolled my eyes, I immediately recognize the dimly lit world around me. I made it. I was inside The Fabricated World.
Little did I know that it was going to be my undoing.
I tried to move my limbs but there was no response, rather I had no limbs. I have no body. I have nothing. That is when it hit me.
All my pieces, all my artworks...
...all of those is a part of me.
This is not just a Fabricated World... this is the World of Guertena.
This place represents who I truly am. This place is me. Everything is covered in sorrow. Everything is covered in pain. There is no way out for me and there's no else in here...
...Mary, what have I done?
-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-
I hear a distant crying... who was it? I put my all into manipulating my thoughts to see my daughter.
There she was in her pink room, just like I imagined her to be. She was lying down near her own portrait, my painting, and crying on her crossed arms. Her deep green gown was disheveled. She was shaking and uttering words...
"F-f-father... where are you?"
"Who are you father?"
"I don't understand anything!"
"I don't understand you..."
"WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME ALONE IN THIS PLACE?!"
"WHY DO YOU HATE ME SO MUCH?!"
For a very long and solitary time, I watched her.
I continued to watch her as she hung her portrait in the lonely pink room. I continued to watch her as she traversed the dim halls of this world. I continued to watch her as unknown things began moving to her side...
...then she picked up a doll. A ragged doll. A doll filled with malice and madness.
I saw a sharp smile on her face as she said to the unknown things...
"Let's be friends forever"
The world shifted and shook violently. Even after all that, I was a failure even to my own daughter. She failed to understand who I truly am and I failed to be beside her forever. I was wrong. I was always wrong. I had nothing. I am nothing.
If it weren't for them. The people on the other side. If they only understood, none of this would have happened. They should die. They should all be trapped in this world instead of my beloved Mary.
As my rage takes over, I see my daughter playing with her crayons. She was smiling but her eyes were empty. Indeed, she is my daughter and I intend to keep it that way. She will never frown again. In this world, she will always be smiling. She will never leave. She will never escape. I will keep my promise and she will obey. She is my creation.
She is Mary.
I am Guertena.
Welcome to our world.