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Nico slowly opened his eyes and saw that he was on the ground of a large, noisy, courtroom. A courtroom he knew all too well of. How did he get here? Then it hit him.

"Fuck! Not another one of these stupid dreams!" He muttered angrily under his breath. "I really got to stop it with the late night PF Changs… ah who am I kidding, that's not happening!"

"NICO!" Yelled a deep, loud voice right into his ear.

Nico turned his head and saw just who he expected to see standing right next to him: it was the one and only Phoenix Wright, running his fingers through his Sonic hedgehog like hair.

"Phoenix? What am I doing here? What the flying-fruity fuck is going on here?!" Nico yelled in a panic.

"You don't remember?" Phoenix yelled. "Maya went to continue her training, so now you get to be my partner/buddy that sits with me during court!"

"Wow? Really?" Nico said, his eyes lighting up and a smile growing across his face. "Who are we defending?"

Before Nick could respond, Nico heard and loud, high, scratchy voice coming from behind him.

"It's me, obviously! You forgot? Honestly, youths these days are so careless!"

Terrified, Nico turned his head and saw Wendy Oldbag, wearing a space costume.

"Oldbag?! YOU'RE our client?! What'd you do this time?!" Nico yelled.

"That's Miss Oldbag to you, whippersnapper!" She yelled, while given him her creepy as hell piranha face.

"Will you guys be quiet over there?"

Nico turned his head towards the prosecution table across the room, and saw Edgeworth wagging his big finger at us.

"Besides," he continued. "We have other issues. We cannot start the trial without the judge. And yet, he has not arrived.

Nico realized that Edgeworth was right. He looked around the courtroom and the judge was nowhere to be seen.

"You're right Edgeworth." Phoenix said. "Nico, you go down the hall and get the Judge."

"Fine." Nico moaned. As he got up, and ran out of the courtroom, down the hall, and to the door of the Judge's room.

He knocked on the door, and when there was no reply, he opened the door himself, which he instantly regretted.

There he saw the Judge tied down onto a table, with Nagito Komaeda straddling his waist, and rubbing a turkey sandwich against his lover's bare chest.

"Komaeda… please… I need it… sooooooo bad… put the sandwich in my mouth!" The Judge said, not noticing a horrified and disgusted Nico standing in the doorway.

"You have to beg for it, Udgey." Komaeda purred.

"JUDGE!" Nico yelled, getting the two's attention.

"Why, if it isn't my best friend, Nico!" Komaeda laughed. "You're just in time to join us!"

"EW! FUCK NO!" Nico screamed, as a chill ran down his balls at the thought. "JUDGE, YOU NEED TO GET IN THAT COURTROOM NOW!"

"Just tell them I'm busy spending time with my beloved Komaeda." The judge said.

"Are you sure you don't want to join us Nico? I got a bagel with your name on it…" Komaeda said, as he unzipped his pants.

Not even responding, Nico slammed the door shut and ran away, down the hall, screaming like he saw a monster.

"The Judge is… busy." Is all Nico could say, when he returned to the courtroom.

"Well then, how are we supposed to have a trial?" Edgeworth said. "He was the only judge in this entire city!"

"HOLD IT!" Phoenix yelled. "I have an idea! Nico, you take his place!"

"Me? Nico thought about it for several moments, and then replied:

"Sure! Why not? How hard could it be?"

Nico climbed up to the judge's big seat and sat down in front of the whole court.

"What a great view!" He thought.

"Now," Nico yelled, while reading off some papers on his desk. "Court is now in session for the trial of Miss Wendy Oldbag, who has been accused of sexual assault towards several young male celebrities, such as Justin Timberlake, Bradley Cooper, and Liam Hemsworth."

"And me…" Edgeworth muttered under his breath.

"Your opening statement, Edgeworth?" Nico asked.

"Here's my opening statement." Edgeworth held up a bag of PF Changs. "I have a month's supply of PF Changs, and I have no problem giving it up if you get that crazy woman in jail and OUT OF MY LIFE!"

"The court finds the defendant, Miss Wendy Oldbag GUILTY!" Nico yelled, slamming his gravel.

"What the hell, Nico?!" Phoenix yelled. "You're supposed to be on MY SIDE!"

"Sorry Nick," Nico said, after he ran down and snatched the bag of PF Changs out of Edgeworth's hands. "It's business."

And with that, Nico stuffed his face with PF Changs while the security guards grabbed the Oldbag away as she cried out for her dear Edgey-boy, and while Phoenix called Maya up on his cell phone, and begged her to come back and work with him again.

"Life is good…" Nico thought to himself. "Life is good…"

I love you Nico! You never fail to make me smile and laugh! Please continue to do what you do, and I promise I will always be a picky penguin! :)