AN: This episode freaked me out when I saw it, the beginning at least. Damn Booth.
Temperance Brennan was a woman of many talents. She was intelligent, witty, brave, she had a strong sense of right and wrong, of justice. She was rational and an excellent writer, she had the capacity to love unconditionally and to bring out a person's strong attributes. To some, she seemed cold and harsh, to others she was loved and revered. Those people overestimated her, and sometimes, they didn't see that she was hurting, badly.
She didn't compartmentalize as well as they thought. An empty vodka bottle was on the floor of her flat's living room, and several more stood idly by, just waiting for her to drown herself in them. Forget everything that she had seen for a little while. Her shirt from earlier was dangling down from the back of the couch, the ends of the sleeves still seeped in crimson blood that gave her chills every time the fabric caught her eyes.
The sound of the gunshot still rang through her ears, the sight of him collapsing, blood staining his shirt, covering her hands. He took a bullet for her. She knew that she shouldn't be surprised, but somehow, the though sent her brain into a mindless frenzy. Would she have done the same for him? Temperance would like to think so, but her mind was so fuzzy that she couldn't even think straight. She just called his name over and over again, begging him to not leave her along. Begging him to stay. Her heart ached painfully.
And on top of everything else, she had taken another life. She had stripped the world of someone with a swift bullet to her throat. Brennan knew she was a good shot, but somehow she didn't expect to hit her mark so accurately. The girl just collapsed to the ground, dead in a pool of her own blood.
Traumatizing as that event was, she couldn't even bring it to the forefront of her mind. All that she could do is think, Seeley is dead, Seeley is dead. Booth had saved her life, but she had killed him in a way. It was her fault that he died, so young and prematurely. It wasn't fair. Life just wasn't fair to her at all. There was no way she could work with someone else. No one else got her like Booth did, no one would put up with her. Her friends wouldn't trust another agent.
She gulped down a double shot of the vodka, straight, and dropped the glass. It shattered on the floor, and finally, tears poured down her cheeks. This would have to be it. She couldn't cry in front of anyone else. Temperance knew that she had to be strong for the rest of her friends, not show any emotion, pretend to be okay with what was going on. It was the only way she wouldn't lose her mind. But she would also have to avoid the funeral.
There was a chance that she would lose her resolve if she went, and she wouldn't have any of that. No matter what, she couldn't let anyone else see how hurt she was. Especially Angela. Angela was already sobbing her eyes out, already hurting so badly. Temperance had to be the rock that Angela could hold on to. What else were best friends for? She would throw herself into her work, what she usually did when she was upset, but this time she had to be ten times as firm as she normally would have been.
There was no room for tears, no room for sadness or regret. All there was room for was truth and justice. That was all that she could fit into her heart anymore. Booth had taken a bigger piece of it than he ever could have guessed.