"Sirius"
"Remus"
"JAMES!"
"SIRIUS!"
"Sorry, couldn't help it!"
"Honestly, Sirius!"
"Move your fork."
"No, you move yours!"
"Sirius, this is not the time to argue. Just move your damn fork from my arse, I'm starting to bleed!"
"Remus, this is no time to talk about your arse, no matter how sexy it may be. The more pressing matter, is your wand sticking into my crotch- come on Remus, don't you want to have little Pudlets?"
"WHAT THE HELL SIRIUS, IS A PUUDLET?!?"
"A Pudlet would be my offspring. I am Padfoot, hence them being Pudlets! It makes perfect sense if you think about it…"
"…"
"Remus?"
"…"
"Remus, come back! Nooo don't leave me! Remus I can't live without you!"
"I am not speaking to the person who will spawn Pudlets."
"Aw but Remus!"
"…"
"I have chocolate…"
"Yes, yes, ok, I love you, now GIVE ME THE CHOCOLATE"
"Say please"
"What?"
"You know, manners"
"You know manners? Who would have thought…? Please?"
"You may think I'm inhuman, but really I'm just an alien!"
"…"
"I gasp at you! You mouth is covered in melted, sticky chocolate"
"Sirius, wipe your mouth, your drooling"
"Let me just lick tha-"
"SIRIUS!"
"Sorry… it does, just… give me that chocolate back!"
"Not until you move your fork!"
"Ohh, so we're back to the fork talk now are we?"
"Sirius, stop that!"
"Why?"
"Don't you remember what happened to James last time?"
"You mean the time he fell down the stairs…?"
"Yes"
"And he broke his arm?"
"Yes"
"And he broke his leg?"
"Yes…"
"And he couldn't play in the quiditch finals the next day because he'd fallen down another flight of stairs on the way to the hospital wing…"
"Yes Sirius, that time"
"And-"
"Sirius, SHUT UP!"
"Yes, yes, ok sorry, yes"
"Sirius?"
"Yes?"
"STOP SAYING YES!"
"Yes, sorry"
"Sirius?"
"Yes?"
"Oh, never mind"
"Remus?"
"Yes…:"
"Can you please move your wand now? I'm starting to see stars"
"Oh, if I must… BUT MOVE THE FORK!"
"…"
"…"
"God that feels better… Remus?"
"Yes Sirius, what is it?"
"Do you want to go to Hogsmede with me?"
"Ah, Sirius…"
"Yes Remus?"
"We're in Hogsmede…"
"Oh, yes, that, I'd forgotten… you know, these cheap hotel rooms"
"SIRIUS!"
"What?"
"We're by Zonko's, NOT in a cheap hotel room…"
"Ah, yes, my mistake!"
"…"
"But Remus?"
"Yes?"
"Would you go with me next trip?"
"Well…"
"Ow, come on Remmy!"
"Oh fine!"
"Yay, now to dance!"
"…"
"Sirius, give the women back her glasses"
"Ow…"
"And her broomstick"
"I want your broomstick…"
"Sirius, shut up!"
"Never! You can't caaaaaaaaaatch me!"
"…"
"Sirius, THE DOOR!"
"Whoa-? Oaff"
"I told you about the door!"
"Remus, is my nose supposed to bend this way?"
"…"
"Remus? Is it?"
"…"
"Oh god, those are my new shoes! You vomited on my new shoes!"
"Oh god…"
"Oh god Remus, YOU VOMITED ON ME AGAIN!"
"I'm ok now… no you're nose… is…"
"Could you have at least of missed my shoes for the third slosh?"
"Just put your nose right, and I'll…"
"Remus, run, over there, vomit in the bushes, NOT ON MY SHOES!"
"I'm ok now…"
"Ok, I'm ok, if you're ok…Remus?"
"Yes?"
"I … lo-"
"Yes?"
"Well… I… ILOVEYOU"
"…"
"…"
"I love you too Sirius"
"Aw…. NOW GIVE ME THE CHOCOLATE!"
"Anything for you my lovely."
"Mmm, Remus…"
"What?!?"
"The chocolate it's sooo good…"
"…"
"Well this beats chocolate."
"Mhmm."
"I love you Remus"
"I Love you too Sirius"
"Now move the fork!"